Modern movies suck.
To remedy this situation, implement these 3 rules:

1) Forbid all remakes.
2) Forbid all sequels.
3) Take away Hollywood's computers.
( Felis Concolor, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 20:14, 23 replies)

Take away a Director's right to direct if a movie makes less than it cost. And producers as well.

(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 20:18, closed)

Then by process of Hollywood accounting, there'd be no directors or producers left.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 20:21, closed)

Michael Bay will probably survive.
Blockbusters for all, and nothing else.

Is that what you want, Felis?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 10:30, closed)

You're trying too hard.

( Felis Concolor, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 11:00, closed)

What??
Some of the best movies ever made made barely any money at all! You can't trust the box office to be any measure of a film's worth, especially nowadays!
www.cnbc.com/id/41762460/The_15_Lowest_Grossing_Oscar_Winners
(idle insomniac enjoys listening to Sigur Rós at stupid hours, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 10:38, closed)

Over what timescale?
Even the biggest turkeys do have a tendency to recoup their costs based on video/ DVD sales, TV repeats, and so on.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 11:07, closed)

There are a lot of good films that bombed at the box office...
...Donnie Darko being one example. In fact, I'd go so far as to admit that I avoid watching the Hollywood blockbusters, because I know I'll be disappointed somehow.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 29 Sep 2011, 12:19, closed)

4) Forbid all 'origin stories' movies
5) Forbid all 'reboots' of superhero franchises (at least have a compulsory 10-year gap)
6) Make leading actors of bio-pics resemble the person in question at least 60% (and not just get Denzel Washington and Morgan Freeman to play every famous black man)
7) Horror movie franchises that hit cinemas every halloween must not be allowed to have more than 1 sequel (No more SAW 71 or Paranormal Activity 25)
8) There should be a '3D Movie Approval Board' on the lines of the Soviet State-controlled Cinema Body that decides which films really deserve to be shot on/ converted in post to 3D.
(aliantartic hasn't been spotted on the island since, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 20:23, closed)

If it bothers you that much, you could just not watch them.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 20:24, closed)

Hackneyed answer is hackneyed.

( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Wed 28 Sep 2011, 20:35, closed)

You still agree with me, admit it.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 21:10, closed)

You have a point

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 29 Sep 2011, 12:21, closed)

If it bothers you that much, you could just not reply

(aliantartic hasn't been spotted on the island since, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 20:35, closed)

That will never happen

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Wed 28 Sep 2011, 20:39, closed)

I vehemently disagree with all of these,
except maybe number 7.
(idle insomniac enjoys listening to Sigur Rós at stupid hours, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 10:40, closed)

Number 8
No need, just the ritual public disembowelling of any producer who authorises the post-production conversion of a 2D film to 3D. The modern 3D process is fine when it's used from the outset, or at least it will be once it's mundane enough for directors not to try and poke your eye out all the time.
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 11:59, closed)

Yes
bring back boring movies.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 21:03, closed)

So...
1. No The Thing (John Carpenter version)
2. No Godfather II
3. No Jar Jar Binks...

You win!
(McChinaman banned, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 8:31, closed)

I posted this on links a few weeks ago, in response to a similar post but here it is again.
The Thing is a remake, and a fucking class movie. Same goes for A Fistful Of Dollars, Magnificent Seven, Invasion of The Body Snatchers, Outland, etc etc etc. Hollywood started out plagiarizing old books and play, and even in the very early 20thC was remaking films from just a couple of years before. The 30s and 40s were chock full of endless sequels and prequels: look at all the old Dracula and Frankenstein movies. There are DOZENS of them, all milking an initially good idea until it becomes a pale, dull immitation. Even Hammer films are mostly rehashes of Universal monster movies. I don't think films are any better or any less shit than they ever were, we just remember all the good stuff from older eras BECAUSE its the good stuff. Think of all the absolute shite that was made around the same time as Jaws and the French Connection. No one cares about the bad films from those periods because they were as bad as most of the rubbish movies of today.
(Kitty Fantastico "Dwarf, Anorexic and In a Fight ", Thu 29 Sep 2011, 9:36, closed)

Every version of Invasion of the Bodysnatchers
is shit.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 10:22, closed)

Not to mention that Shakespeare plundered every old tale and myth he could find for material

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 10:50, closed)

A bit too Campbellian, that.

( Felis Concolor, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 11:00, closed)

The Forbidden Planet
Was ace. But is was really The Tempest set in space.

I would go so far as to say that not enough old books are turned into films. My point being that 2012 took away valuable screen time from something else more worthy. Anything.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 29 Sep 2011, 12:23, closed)