Most revolting thing was probably when someone threw up in out downstairs bathroom.
We have the type of radiators with the vents in the top. They didn't make it to the toilet and threw up down the wall and in to the radiator. He then cleaned up as best he could, sprayed a bunch of air freshener around and said nothing. The next morning the central heating came on and filled the house with the smell of hot vomit.
( Peej, Mon 12 Oct 2015, 9:24, 7 replies)

Housewarming
Threw a housewarming party about 20 yrs ago, invited around 40 people.
There was a large piece of waste ground next to the flat so we had a huge bonfire, that apparently could be seen for miles away. Anyway it attracted loads of gatecrashers, ended up with around 200 people.
The food and booze vanished in minutes, we had a whip round and restocked from the local co-op
Some crusty locked themselves in my bathroom and took a bath , there was no hot water , they used a whole bottle of bath oil and left a black greasy tide mark round the bath.
Someone stole a pair of curtains, some bikers turned up and had a fight, someone ended up thrown onto the bonfire.
I spent the whole night fretting a bit and going around introducing myself as the party host and asking who they were.
I ended up locking the flat and keeping the party outside.
Made cups tea in the morning for the dozen or so randoms who spent the night sleeping by the fire.
Was a bloody good night in the end and made some new friends.
I would overhear strangers talking about it for a couple of weeks afterwards.
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Sun 11 Oct 2015, 19:06, 2 replies)

House Party!

( $$ ✅, Sun 11 Oct 2015, 12:25, 3 replies)

when I turned 21 I was a stoner failing his way through university
I thought a house party was a good way to celebrate, and used it as an excuse to invite a bunch of people I thought might be fun. Along with big drinking suburban relatives I invited two brazilian drug dealers. They were friends of a friend, but I'd once donated my hydroponic setup to them, and they recriprocated by supplying the whole party for nothing, or at least those who made the trip to the bedroom. Another friend who went on to have a reasonably successful music career agreed to play his two-piece led zepplin cover band in the backyard. A mate who I hadn't seen in 10 years and had spent the last few of them in the punk scene in bulgaria turned up, mohawk and piercings. I remember my dad's springer spaniel spent the whole party with his wet nose wedged up against his punk girlfriend's clunge. We figured she was on her rags. Trying to mingle, stoned drunk and e'd up, I remember going upstairs to see somebody standing on the pool table while hacking down with a sword to somebody blocking with another sword while an old high school mate blithely attempted to scratch DJ on the decks to poor effect. Somebody had given me a set of sumurai swords as a present and the sword fights had been going on all evening. Saw the sun come up sitting in a swimming pool still talking bullshit with the last of the guests. Bit of cleaning up the next day, but it was a good party.
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Sun 11 Oct 2015, 12:19, 8 replies)

hoose trashed
i was at a party where the houseowners dalmation got the dots joined up by marker pen, and eggs and flour were put in the toaster. hallions!
(terryhoosh remembers when this was all fields, Sun 11 Oct 2015, 12:03, Reply)

Mt favourite party was the one when we were hanging upside down being held by our legs and spraying beer on everyone down below .. that and some drunk girl wandering around telling everyone her boyfriend had no pubes so we all had to pluck a few ... she was walking around with a handful of pubes + we nearly killed the family dog because someone gave it a chicken drumstick and it started choking. I miss the 80's.

Another one I went to ended up as national front page newspaper news, a sort of sign of things to come with those idiots who used to post on facebook about upcoming parties at their parents house but this was before facebook. After I left that party, someone had stolen a bulldozer and driven it into the side of the house after everyone else had robbed the place.

I threw a party once in my parents garden because my Sister was wise enough to lock us all out. One of our guests decided to show us how sharp his bowie knife was by running it along the back of his wrist. After we called the paramedics and he'd been stitched up at the hospital, he surprisingly came back to the party and continued drinking before hiding up a tree.
(Swafty, Sun 11 Oct 2015, 9:25, 2 replies)

I was *that* guy
I got way wasted at a house party and the girl in question who was having the party ended up in bed with me....being a teenage house party : everyone at school assumed I'd shagged her....oops!
(SpIrItZ420 If alcohol isn't the answer...fuckit, Sun 11 Oct 2015, 3:07, 3 replies)

My phone keeps saying
This page is in Thai. Translate to English?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Sat 10 Oct 2015, 13:56, 4 replies)

This situation really is awful.

(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Sat 10 Oct 2015, 12:12, 2 replies)

Things learnt from party guests
One fellow had just returned from Point Barrow, Alaska. Sun never sets there in the summer, and it's always foggy, so people lose all sense of time, never sleep, get drunk, drive around and have lots of crashes.
(Perv With A Dog had his eyes pecked out by scrub jays on, Sat 10 Oct 2015, 1:30, Reply)

Haha, someone was sick in the back garden.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 21:03, Reply)

come on, we can do this together

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(Guy Debord cette mauvaise réputation..., Fri 9 Oct 2015, 15:15, 7 replies)

What's happened to the newsletter?
I miss the weekly round-up of witty Amazon reviews and somesuch.
(Porcupine, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 14:25, 2 replies)

I went to a party where a lad was wearing a spiked collar.
I impaled an apple on one of the spikes, then ate it. My other half accused me of leading him on.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 11:13, 1 reply)

Yeah me. Posting an in joke that only a clique of morons will understand. And then pretend that it's funny. Period. Oh hahaha they'll type you are the funny. Hahaha.
teeheehee
(DOCTOR FUCK your friend and colleague, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 11:12, 3 replies)

Nothing, I am only ever the soul of decorum and the spirit of moderation at parties.

( Kroney, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 11:07, Reply)

Inside Joke Reference #6 that upsets DOCTOR FUCK

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 10:41, 1 reply)

A few years ago we were invited to the engagement party of my cousin's daughter
The evening seemed to be going swimmingly, until the bride-to-be and groom-to-be had a massive argument, culminating in them splitting up on the spot.

We then discovered the following day that the groom-to-be had narrowly avoided imprisonment for war crimes following his time in the army in Iraq.

More gallingly, we never got our fucking gift vouchers back.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 9 Oct 2015, 10:14, Reply)

I don't get invited to parties any more :(

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 10:07, 6 replies)

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 10:06, 1 reply)

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 10:03, Reply)

FOUR Weddings and a funeral

( buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 9:50, Reply)

omg a richard question

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 9:50, 1 reply)

TURD

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 9:41, 3 replies)

second

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 9:41, Reply)

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 9 Oct 2015, 9:39, 10 replies)