An average lovers spat
Well, this is possibly the most pathetic argument ever to arise in the history of mankind and so petty that I only remember what it was about for its pettyness.

It was about if a burger uncooked was called a "patty" or not.

This turned into an insanely intense fight, my husband firmly shouting that it was called a patty when uncooked and me saying it was just a raw burger. This soon brought up kinds of things from the past, money troubles and anything else would could use as ammo. Throw in some cheap insults for good messure and drag on through the entire night with no sleep and you soon get the picture.

So it gets to about 6am and he continues shouting and leaning into my face and I obviously shout back, till we are inches a part and I say "if you dont get out of my face I'm going to hit you!"

He replies with "if you do it will be the last time you ever do!"

to which I retort in a matter-of-factly tone "..... not if I hit you twice."

End of argument, cue laughter.

P.S
I'm still pleased at winning this argument even now :)
If anybody can tell me whether it's a patty or raw burger I will be eternally grateful. And if after you don't see me post again it's probably because one of us is in jail.
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 3:27, 45 replies)

patty
I am of the belief that "patty" refers to the shape. If it's basically round and flat, it's a patty, cooked or not. Just proves you don't have to be right to win an argument.
( madrabbit is fully prepared, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 6:50, closed)

damn :(

though that doesnt mean a burger is a patty :O
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 7:07, closed)

I think you both lost.
But, on the plus side, you've married one another so everybody else wins.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 8:00, closed)

So your story is 'we're both too mentally unstable to google something?'

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 8:09, closed)

we were both too terrified of the outcome....
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 9:08, closed)

As it turns out, you're both wrong, patty and burger are interchangeable terms, whether the meat is cooked or uncooked.
So I think a joint suicide is the only option.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 9:14, closed)

Considering some of the other QOTW posts, I think mine was kinda normal...
Anyway a joint suicide wouldnt work, we wouldnt trust eachother....
(I bet he's just trying to trick me into it, so he can cash in on the life insurance).... *isnt at all paranoid*
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 9:22, closed)

Joint suicide
My wife and I decided to do joint suicide....she went first......funnily enough i felt better after she had gone...so i am soldiering on!!
(spinks its only kinky the first time, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 13:10, closed)

Oh thanks btw, now he's all smug ... fucking patty, who calls it a fucking patty...
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 9:25, closed)

Americans.
So if your husband is american, then he's fine. If not, he's a prick.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:25, closed)

What she said ^^

( snee held his breath since, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 13:37, closed)

We once fell out like that over two bananas
His mother sent me some fruit, including the bananas, which I didn't eat because they irritated a bad tooth I had at the time. He thought I was being ungrateful. It got really vicious. Over two bananas.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 9:45, closed)

Is anybody on here capable of an adult relationship?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 10:37, closed)

Of course not
We're all internet geeks. And that's the closest we've ever been to a woman.
(Chickenwire social lubricator extraordinaire, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 11:09, closed)

I'm sure that, were they clinically assessed, 98.5% of QOTWers would be classified as having a mental age of 12 or under.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:21, closed)

I had a huge fight with my mum once over a tin of butterbeans.
HUGE fight. I bought her five of her own bloody tins the next day and stuck a big bow on them so she knew to leave mine alone. =D
( vix0r was not Matthew on, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:14, closed)

Me and my then-girlfriend once had an argument, which ended in shouting,
about whether a time machine would be better, or an anarchist revolution.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 11:14, closed)

Now that is something to aspire to :P
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 11:27, closed)

This place
(http://www.murrys.com/products/burgers) sells "frozen burger patties", implying that they're still called patties before being cooked.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 11:16, closed)

I'm with you
A burger is a burger, cooked or not.

I'll even go out on a limb and say that 'patty' is probably one of those Americanisms they invented in place of using a proper word. (Runs and hides)
( fluffymitten NAN, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 11:33, closed)

Oh god..
If my husband thinks he's doing a barbeque this summer he can fuck right off. He's just got my whole family (including my grandparents) arguing about whether the term "sausage" refers to the meat or the shape.
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 11:52, closed)

So you're married to an argumentative retard, and also come from a family of argumentative retards.
It's clearly not the fucking meat, seeing as sausages can be made from a variety of things, some of them not even cunting meat. Honest to shitting zombie jesus, you're on the internet, where every possible piece of information is easily available.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:13, closed)

I love this.

(__, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:31, closed)

Hmmm
I think he was just doing it as a test, as he had no input to offer, he just sat back and listened.
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:33, closed)

So you're married to a man who starts family arguments?
EXCELLENT CHOICE THERE.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:35, closed)

....
he says "they love me, fuck knows why but they do" so he's a bigot aswell....
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:51, closed)

How does that make him a bigot?
Are you actually just a mentally handicapped, attention seeking teenager? Because you seem to know fuck all about anything.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:55, closed)

By the way..
I forgot to mention I'm a vegetarian.
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:39, closed)

This gets better all the time.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 12:39, closed)

Beth
Go back to the kitchen and leave the internets to semi intelligent people theres a love!
(spinks its only kinky the first time, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 13:12, closed)

I'm not Beth, you reply idiot.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 13:15, closed)

fucksocks!
(spinks its only kinky the first time, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 13:43, closed)

twat
(samurai_beth, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 13:18, closed)

that'll be MR twat to you!!
(spinks its only kinky the first time, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 13:43, closed)

of course it's the fucking meat. If it's not got meat in it, it's not a sausage.

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Sat 12 Feb 2011, 13:30, closed)

Don't you fucking start.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 13:37, closed)

Coming from a similar family, it's not so much the lack of information
as the fact that your opinion is FACT. For example, we didn't play Scrabble this Christmas because we spent the 3 hours we'd set aside arguing over which dictionary we should use. (It was between a school one and a concise Oxford, the argument my grandma made for the school one was "The proper words are all in there, it's the complicated stuck up words in the other one, and it's cheating to use snobby words.")
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 22:35, closed)

I'm just glad to know of all the other insanely stupid arguments,
It's making me feel like less of a twat.
(samurai_beth, Sun 13 Feb 2011, 4:29, closed)

Well I understood that a patty referred to the shape.
Way back when if you were making a pie and you had a little left over pastry you would roll it, flatten it, put a little jam on top and put it in a patty tin. It would then be eaten by the children after dinner with a bit of custard.

Therefore an uncooked burger could be called a raw burger patty.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Sat 12 Feb 2011, 17:36, closed)

*learns*

(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Sat 12 Feb 2011, 22:32, closed)

but why's a burger made out of beef called a hamburger?
(spinks its only kinky the first time, Sun 13 Feb 2011, 10:26, closed)

Because they came from Hamburg...
and then the the Germans moved to the US
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Sun 13 Feb 2011, 11:21, closed)

And what about that airline food?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 13 Feb 2011, 12:42, closed)

One assumes that you cook the pastry at some stage.

(ThomsonsPier consumes, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 14:43, closed)

Who flipping cares ;)

(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 12:31, closed)