Having drunk too much last night
This evening, I'm stopping in with a curry.

What has stopped you from going out with normal people this evening?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:25, 115 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm a billy no mates mainly
but tonight - although I wouldn't say no to the right kind of company - I really don't mind being on my own. I'm watching Kick Ass, eating baked camembert and I'm going to have a great big fucking spliff in a bit.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:27, Reply)

I like the first two parts of this!
and I'm just chilliiiiiiiiiiiing.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:52, Reply)

Cheers midear
you're back in the UK, aren't you? Where are you off to next?
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:57, Reply)

Staying put until Noel and I go off on our Thames adventure.
Was quite unwell for the last week or two and Noel was lovely and offered to put me up.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:58, Reply)

They're coming to mine.

(PsychoChomp, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:31, Reply)

Doing work
Or more accurately, telling everyone I'm doing work and pissing about.
(StapMyVitals wouldn't mind a bit of that, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:36, Reply)

Chicken wiiiiings!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:38, Reply)

Got your nibbles sorted then?

(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:43, Reply)

Yeah I was lame, Marmite cashew and a bag of Kettle chips.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:44, Reply)

A singular cashew?
I'm sorry dude, but that really is lame.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:47, Reply)

Told you.
Are you more calm now?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:49, Reply)

Yes, mostly, thankyou
I haven't felt that wound up in a looooong time. I will feel even more calm later when I have one of my bimonthly smokes.
Hows you, Noely Noel?
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:52, Reply)

Oh dear lord, not you too !
Self murder via the means of illegal drugs is prolific around here !
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:57, Reply)

Drug-free here uncle Gonz
What's my reward? Funding for a community-based arts project?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:00, Reply)

Good lass !
I don't get this thing when you hear teens saying "I never stollen anything, I never taken any real drugs, I'm 16 and don't have a kid"..... like they want an award for not doing the things they're not supposed to do in the first place.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:02, Reply)

I once put my shopping into a hessian Tesco bag,
and when I got home I realised I hadn't scanned the bag.
So I'd stolen it. But I didn't mean to.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:05, Reply)

You drink and smoke and you eat food that's bad for you
tell me exactly how a £40 a year weed 'habit', if habit it can be called, is any worse for me than, for instance, any of the things above? It isn't. I'm a biologist and I know exactly what weed and alcohol do to the body, and I really don't think I have anything to worry about. Are you by some miracle more informed than I am on this matter? I find it unlikely.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:01, Reply)

It's a slipperly slope berk
A £40 a year habit could easily grow for a £45 a year habit or more.

You need help.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:03, Reply)

I probably spend more than that on chocolate for fucks sake
in fact...that's less than a quid a week, so I definitely spend more on chocolate than on weed.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:04, Reply)

So you get really bad munchies?
berk, this ADDICTION is SERIOUS.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:07, Reply)

No, I just eat that much chocolate anyway
a quid a week on chocolate really isn't that much!
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:10, Reply)

A bullet can cost less than £40, and that can also kill.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:10, Reply)

So can smoking cigarettes, drinking booze and eating fatty foods
what exactly is the point you're trying to make here?
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:11, Reply)

I wasn't making any point, it was an off-the-cuff jokey comment that you bit at (and one I've made 100s of times) and then you felt the need to justify yourself for some reason.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:13, Reply)

You mean you make jokes?
You mean you, Mum, Barbara and your cousin weren't outside BGB's that time?
You're a FRAUD.
I bet your bleeding mother isn't even going to take me the pics and buy me jelly worms is she?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:20, Reply)

Yeh', but if she refers to you as her daughter, she means it in a friendly way, rather than because I told her we're getting hitched.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:39, Reply)

Should I bring my wedding planning book with me?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:47, Reply)

That would be great, do you mind if I borrow it first so I can cut out pictures of my head and selotape them over other people's heads and verious points?
Oh god, I've thought up of a great NSFW blog post.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:57, Reply)

But I guess you're right, popular opinion in the medical comunity, espeically the mental health side of things, is probably wrong anyway.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:11, Reply)

Oh, I agree with you
that long term, heavy use of marijuana, particularly skunk, will affect your mental health. But two spliffs a month? Christ, I take a bigger risk by cycling in to work every day.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:14, Reply)

I think anything in too much excess on a regular basis is bad for anyone.
I think it's well documented that if you're prone to mental illness, then even the once can be enough.

I'll be honest, I really don't care, personally I don't like the stuff, but I also don't like Tuna and loads of people eat tuna.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:26, Reply)

Don't get all blasé about tuna abuse now Gonz
With your lax attitude you're inadvertently endorsing it to the kiddies
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:28, Reply)

Blasé ? Like the blaséing squad? Oh my dear sweet lord, I think we've uncovered an entire drugs culture in modern rap music !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:34, Reply)

*burns cds*
*stops burning cds in case I get high on the fumes*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:35, Reply)

Hahahahahahahaha.
That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:14, Reply)

Oh, are bullets more expensive than that? I donno, never tried to buy one.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:19, Reply)

Ah, but the pen is mightier than the sword!
Oh, you mentioned bullets, not swords.
And we're typing, not writing.
Oh boy I've ballsed up here now haven't I Gonz.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:17, Reply)

The main thing is that you're not murdering yourself on a bimonthly period, while helping the downfall of society.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:20, Reply)

No, but I might make a skirt next week.
I know how to be dangerous.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:22, Reply)

Double pleet?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:28, Reply)

Oh not yet. Too much for me.
You some kind of pleat dealer??
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:29, Reply)

Nah', I'm a bit like Puff Daddy (oh good, do you think that's where his name comes from? ___DRUGS??!??!?!__ ? Oh god, I bought his album, I'm funding a druglord !!)
... in the respect that I only tell people I'm a Dealer, but I'm not really.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:33, Reply)

Uh huh
we'll see which of us gets lung cancer first, shall we?
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:23, Reply)

Maybe none of us will have to get lung cancer if you* wern't "Smoking the wacky backy" and getting "well gnarlly" every two weeks.... and did the job my** money is paying for !
* and by you, I mean the entire biological, phamacutical and medical comunty.
** and by that, I mean, the entire country, in tax form.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:31, Reply)

Gonz that is bloody ridiculous. Weed is no worse than cigarettes and alcOhol

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 22:45, Reply)

Good mate ta, good news today, fucking batty houseguest and chicken wings makes for a good day.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:58, Reply)

Sounds like it's all sunshine and roses with you :)
lucky git. I take it you're putting Poppet up currently?
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:08, Reply)

Yup, she's considerably more mental than she makes out to be on here.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:09, Reply)

Somehow, I have no trouble believing that...

(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:12, Reply)

thanks guys. Feeling the love here.

(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:13, Reply)

Pork chops in a mustard'n'honey'n'curry(ish) sauce... really sticky and slightly crispy but perfectly cooked.
And pearl barley cooked with chicken stock and dried porchino mushrooms and chopped parsley.

OH BOY OH BOY OH BOY, I'm _such_ an amazing cooker.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 19:42, Reply)

Chicken and potato bake with a creamy dill sauce and a crispy cheesy top
I'm good at inventing things with whatever's in the fridge, and it's similar to something I had once when I was on holiday.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:01, Reply)

Oh that sounds goooood.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:41, Reply)

Because none of my people are normal.
Me and my mate cannot be bothered leaving our respective flats, so we're going to talk on the phone for a bit and pretend we shared an evening of each other's company.
I need some 'me' time and have to do my nails. And maybe some sewing. Maybe in the morning...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:03, Reply)

Because I hate the outside world.
Might have a bubblebath tonight. Have an early night and try not to get to scared by Doctor Who.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:14, Reply)

Sounds perfick.
Should I have a bubble bath?
Nope. I'll do my nails and toes and then I'll have some vino.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:21, Reply)

I rarely paint my nails, really can't be bothered to wait for them to dry
Going for dinner with my sister tomorrow to a restaurant Rachelswipe suggested, been planning what I'm going to have :D
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:24, Reply)

Is it a restaurant or a gym?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:26, Reply)

Nup, honest-to-god restaurant.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:30, Reply)

Get everything. All of the food.
Can you tell I've had no crisps and minimal cheese since Tuesday?
:(
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:27, Reply)

I've been on my diet for just under a week.
I'm looking forward to it. Means I can't really eat anything tomorrow though.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:30, Reply)

Course you can, just not naughty stuff

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:35, Reply)

I'll try and have breakfast this morning. But I'll be in the library so can't have soup for lunch which would be excellent for being light in the day.
Ooh, I fancy eggs at some point.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:37, Reply)

Eggs are no harm whatsoever
Have a nice omelette.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:38, Reply)

I miss having a bath in my flat
and being able to drink wine and read books and being all pruney and self indulgent.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:22, Reply)

Ooh, I don't like reading in the bath.
I tend to twitch a lot and don't want to risk dropping it.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:25, Reply)

Can't you get one of those tin baths and have it in your living room?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:25, Reply)

I went from having a shower only to a bath/shower combo in the new place.
I consider this to be a fucking result and have had more than my fair share of particularly girly manly bubblebaths since moving in.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:25, Reply)

JEALOUS
you big girl
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:26, Reply)

he's a massive pansy

(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:27, Reply)

-high fives-
How are you, Mr Noel? Hope you're well.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:31, Reply)

Good thanks Lampers, full of chicken.
What are you full of?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:34, Reply)

I'm full of veggie sausages and smilie faces, because I'm a massive child like that.
And full of information rattling round my head. I need to relax a bit, hence bath.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:35, Reply)

Ooooh smilie faces, I haven't had those for yonks.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:38, Reply)

Have you got any Party Rings for 'afters'?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:49, Reply)

She may, or she may not
but I'm going to have hazelnut chocolate ripple ice cream in 45 minutes, I'm so excited I might do a Gonz and start saying Oh boy oh boy oh boy.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:53, Reply)

This is homemade ice-cream yes?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:01, Reply)

Whatever it is, it sounds delicious.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:02, Reply)

Indeedy it is
I keep peering in to the window in the lid of the machine like an excitable child.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:29, Reply)

No, I had a frozen mars bar because I've barely eaten today.
And the calories are all sleeping, aren't they?!
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:56, Reply)

Yes Lampito, yes they are.
Likewise, food taken from someone elses plate has no calories, and broken biscuits have had all the calories fall out of them.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:58, Reply)

Calories mean "heat" or something, don't they, so cold calories aren't calories at all!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:02, Reply)

I am stealing this
for I will shortly have 2 litres of extremely fucking tasty ice cream.

See also: calories eaten whilst exercising do not count, and chocolate is a bean, therefore a vegetable, therefore one of my five a day.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:05, Reply)

I've got a similar view on cider.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:06, Reply)

Ah, the 'it's made of apples which are fruit which are good for me'?
yeah, I think that too.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:15, Reply)

Correct!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:54, Reply)

Calories eaten while exercising?
Walking's exercise, right. So if I eat while walking up and down the stairs...negative calories?!
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:08, Reply)

Yup, that's the one.
this is why I used to go to McDonalds after the gym. Totally counterproductive, but mmmm, endorphins.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:12, Reply)

Yes. Yes that's correct.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:05, Reply)

I can't stand baths.
I wish I could, but I get bored and then disturbed by the fact I'm sitting in dirt. And then I get in the shower instead...
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:09, Reply)

Taking a nice bath is good.
A nice bath beats a refreshing shower.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:25, Reply)

Mmm, but I never feel clean when I've had a bath
they're more for relaxing in.
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:25, Reply)

Well you should shower after your bath.
Otherwise you'll just have sat in your own filth for half and hour and be unable to rise.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:26, Reply)

I do
for exactly that reason. But...a mere half an hour? Nah. I have to add fresh hot water at least three times, and drink at least half a bottle of wine :)
(berk, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:29, Reply)

I always start a bath thinking
'I'll read a book and drink some cider whilst I soak.'

Reality is always 'Right, that's TalkSport on the radio, I'll loaf about here until the reported traffic jam on the M6 has cleared'

But I end up getting bored and about half an hour after getting in, I'm ready to get out again.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:46, Reply)

Ooh, I remember when I came back from the first festival I went to, I had a 20 min long shower then a long, long bath
with many cups of tea.

I hate feeling grotty.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:32, Reply)

The post-Glastonbury 'clean' is quite an operation.
I tend to go with shower, bath, shower - and still be amazed at just how much more dirty I find the following day.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:48, Reply)

Nothing's keeping me in
I've got to go to work soon. I've had a really good day and it's about to be ruined by having to go and hear the shite band we've got on. Not that anyone who is willingly in the pub tonight can be described as 'normal'.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:26, Reply)

Is tonight your U2 tribute act?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:27, Reply)

*sigh*
Yes. Some utter cunts were phoning the pub this afternoon and being all excited when I said what it was. So now not only do I have to fill bottles with piss to throw at the band, I have to have some for the audience too. *starts chugging water*
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:38, Reply)

I just did a weird brainwrong 'cus an internet group I follow on facebook phone up pubs that let EDL have their meet ups.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:46, Reply)

I follow them too

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:56, Reply)

Yay !
Although I don't always agree with them. Have you seen the "Laughing at the EDL" group? That _sometimes_ is a good laugh.

SPORT ARE TROOPS
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:59, Reply)

Yeah I posted a video on it the other day.
Fucking hell this is like torture. Expect an extreme rant tomorrow.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:54, Reply)

Because the hairdresser stole my fringe in the barber's today.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:29, Reply)

The bastard

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:30, Reply)

I'm angry with myself as well.
I didn't need it cut, it looked class. I just thought if I got it done before going back to Newcastle I could get out of paying for it. It's come back to bite me on the bottom.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:37, Reply)

Fucking theif =(

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:40, Reply)

Well nick something from Tescos to restore the balance of power.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:44, Reply)

There isn't a Tesco near me down here.
Only Sainsburys and the guardians of the treasure are well on top in there. Otherwise I'd have nabbed some ham and sellotaped it to my forehead.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:49, Reply)

ham? Don't you mean SPAM?
Oi! SPAM-HEAD!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 20:57, Reply)

I just made what promises to be the best sandwich ever.
And now, I am watching a film with the mrs. Nice.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:07, Reply)

That sandwich is gonna be awesome.
Did you pour the jucies from the pan in with the mushrooms?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:09, Reply)

Nah, they didn't need it.
Butter, garlic, brandy and Worcester sauce were enough... Some of the juice went in to the loaf though. Not too much, I don't want floppy bread!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:12, Reply)

bra-vo, sounds amazing.
If you want some really good chips, ASDA have these potatos (they're not asda brand, I don't know what they're called) that come in a paper bag with a net window... fry them up until yellow, put them on the side to cool, as you might have to do more than one batch depending on your biggest pan.... then fry them up with thick-silced onion until the chips are golden brown and the onion is blackened (about 30 mins and then another 30 mins).

Then for a vinigar, try and get Sushi viniger, or "Seasoned rice viniger" and some salt.

I promise you, there is no better chip on the planet.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 8 Jan 2011, 21:27, Reply)