Guess what? NakedApe is 'dominating the popular page'!
Please use this thread to leave him messages of congratulation, offers of film/television work, tit-shots, cock-gazzes and the like. This is a Big Deal for him - things have been pretty tough 'chez Ape' lately what with his erectile dysfunction and those (UNFOUNDED) nonce accusations, so let's all get behind him and really give the blithering dimwit something to drool about on his way home on the Sunshine Coach tonight, yeah?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:33, 113 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

The Popular Page is a lot like competing in the special olympics.
Win or lose, you're still a retard.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:38, Reply)

This reply is lacking the 'feel-good factor' I was looking for.
Can't you come up with something a little more upbeat?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:42, Reply)

Not really. No.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:49, Reply)

Not even for the Apester?
Come on Jeff! You can do it!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:55, Reply)

Err... Umm....
Of all the people posting on Off Topic going by the name Naked Ape, Naked Ape is by far and away the best of them...

Does that work?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:58, Reply)

He's not that good. Calm down.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:01, Reply)

Okay, consider it amended.
Of all the people posting on Off Topic going by the name Naked Ape, Naked Ape is by far and away the best one of them...
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:03, Reply)

That's better.
He's already gone mad with power - let's not stoke the furnace, eh?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:05, Reply)

I'm not planning on stoking anything.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:11, Reply)

Hey, I was pretty chuffed being on there for two posts at the same time
also, I win biggest post on there at the moment I reckon

and yes, this is my greatest achievement
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:20, Reply)

Nakedape is a well good poster, but he'll never be a Wet Ham Man

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:41, Reply)

RIP MY NIGGAH.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:56, Reply)

Now that NakedApe is king of popular he can suck my dog off anytime

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:42, Reply)

Nakedape is so popular he's now getting gaz messages from Bella inviting him to her munchy box

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:44, Reply)

It's a roll-over week at Ape Towers.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:44, Reply)

Shut the boards down, NakedApe is the hands down winner

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:47, Reply)

if he is a member of the church of Rome
We could rename him NakedPape.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:45, Reply)

Now the charges have been dismissed (after the witness 'went missing')
we can no longer call him NakedRapeOfAMinor.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:46, Reply)

I heard he likes a bit of 15" black rubber cock action.
NakedGape.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:50, Reply)

I heard that too. From his mum.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:53, Reply)

I've just checked, he still maintains his stranglehold over the popular page :((
It's a tyranny!
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 17:55, Reply)

he has piles.
Naked bumgrapes.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:03, Reply)

We're just slaves, toiling under the oppressive yoke of his hilarity.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:04, Reply)

bit late but
i read this as "it's a tranny".
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:00, Reply)

i'd bake him some cookies

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:06, Reply)

I wouldn't even open a packet of biscuits for him.
Granted, if I had some biscuits in the house, my position on this might change.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:10, Reply)

Have you got your metalwork installed yet?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:12, Reply)

School nick-name lols

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:14, Reply)

Hahahahahhaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:15, Reply)

I was trying to find a picture of popstars and nonce, 5 Star (I'm pretty sure they all had metal teeth)

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:17, Reply)

i don't get this joke >:(

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:30, Reply)

It wasn't very funny K.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:32, Reply)

i've been looking at pictures of people with braces
i'm going to look like a fool
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:36, Reply)

wear them with a bit of pazazz and you could make it a new fashion statement

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:38, Reply)

i think i will get hot pink bands to show how sassy i am

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:39, Reply)

I think you can get invisible braces now.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:42, Reply)

i'm sure you could but i can't
because it's less of my teeth and more of my jaw
plus you are only allowed a certain amount of them, once you run out, if your shit isn't fixed, you'll have to buy more
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:43, Reply)

It sounds like they are quite expensive anyway.
So fingers crossed the ones you're getting do the job.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:46, Reply)

actually they're cheaper than the standard metal lot, but you get 10 sets, if that doesn't work you get 10 more
but that's it, you'll have to buy more

also, with these metal ones i get the rubber bands which works with my jaw
and i pray i won't need headgear :(
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:51, Reply)

tomorrow
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:17, Reply)

I think nakedape is lovely.
I want to give him a big squishy hug.
( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:32, Reply)

Howdie Blousie.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:33, Reply)

How do!
*winks*
( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:38, Reply)

I'm tired Blousie.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:40, Reply)

Why?

( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:41, Reply)

I've not had enough sleep over the last few days.
How are you?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:41, Reply)

Are you all excited about the AV referendum on Thursday?
Is that keeping you up?

Evenin' Dogfucker. Evenin' all.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:44, Reply)

I need to read both the 'no and 'yes' pros and cons. I've had my head in the sand about the whole thing.
Alright TD, how is ya bid'ness goin?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:45, Reply)

Too slowly for me
I go on a course this weekend to get my professional accreditation, then it's all systems go.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:51, Reply)

Good work!
Are your IT skills coming along at a rate at which you're happy?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:54, Reply)

Incredibly yes
Taught myself an awful lot whilst sitting in a coach park in Blackpool yesterday for seven hours.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:58, Reply)

I'm ok.
I'm getting a bit stressed about the bash though. Thinking about what food to get and where everyone is sleeping etc
( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:44, Reply)

How many folk do you have bashing with you?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:46, Reply)

Quite a few on Friday and even more on Saturday : /

( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:49, Reply)

How do get rid of the clagnuts come Sunday afternoon ?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:50, Reply)

Easy. With one of these.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:52, Reply)

The corpulent unwanted b3tan is more tenacious than that

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:54, Reply)

send them all to stay at scaitcliffe hall

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:51, Reply)

Enzyme was going to stay there last year but the whole place was booked for a wedding.

( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:53, Reply)

i wonder how they keep going
whenever we have a family event there, we seem to be the only ones there.

maybe this says more about the yorkshire side of my family, come to think of it...

there's todmorden old hall too, that's nice.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:57, Reply)

Bash Bash Bash!
That is all.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:47, Reply)

Who are dreading turning up?
You know the most boring or tedious or just plain old frighteningly socially crippled
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:47, Reply)

Unlike normal bashes, my bashees are hand picked for their looks, intellect and humour.

( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:48, Reply)

And sometimes I turn up as well

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:49, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:49, Reply)

Have you ordered the big cage?
As I'm the bash equivalent of a dancing bear.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:55, Reply)

Thanks for the gaz!
I never realised that about them, gee whiz
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:50, Reply)

*wiggles eyebrows*

( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:51, Reply)

I'd never realised that you were racist as well

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:55, Reply)

Don't forget my rampant homophobia.

( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:56, Reply)

It's all cool, if you keep this up I'll nominate you for the s****t board

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:59, Reply)

i would have liked to come
but instead am going to the BEST hotel on the beach in dorset, it's chocolate themed, and you get unlimited chocolate all day. i made sure we booked the white chocolate suite.

then i rememberered that i don't eat chocolate any more. FML.

had i been there, however, it would have answered rory's question for you.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:51, Reply)

Why are you not eating chocolate anymore?

( girlinthehole, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:52, Reply)

it reminds me of something i want badly to forget!
i'll get over it, but in the meantime i am relishing the emo-ness of it, because it stops me eating chocolate, which has got to be a good thing.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:56, Reply)

*Memories* Naked Piston in the chocolate fountain, a couple very much in love

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:57, Reply)

funnily enough
you can order your very own chocolate fountain in the hotel we're staying in. i could re-create the magic...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:59, Reply)

WHO'S BEEN STICKING THEIR NOB IN THE NUTELLA AGAIN?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:15, Reply)

haaaaaaaaaaaaa
my flatmate loves the stuff, she'd never look at it in the same light again!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:24, Reply)

I rekon you'd blow off at least one fat virgin with poor personal hygiene there

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:53, Reply)

oooh are you going to be in dorset too???
woohoo, threesome!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:56, Reply)

Man I'll break out my FISTING gloves for that

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:00, Reply)

you mean your boxing gloves?
erm. maybe i'll just play with the chocolate fountain whilst you do my friend?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:01, Reply)

Man / woman details please
Gaz a few intimate photos, it best not be munchy box time
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:02, Reply)

she has long dark hair and green eyes and big boobs
and irritatingly everyone always thinks we are sisters (my brother loves to wind us up by calling us "special sisters"). she lives in south manchester and has appeared in the odd story on here from time to time (most notably involving a tampon and anal sex).
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:06, Reply)

Right I'm there, I'll try and have a wash but well you know, the six month stink has set in, and there's little that I can do about my virginity
You'll both fackin love it
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:08, Reply)

I'll bring my warhammer game board

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:09, Reply)

I didn't think Warhammer uses a board.
You tell me though.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:13, Reply)

huff HUff HUFF HUFF *WHERE@S MY INHALER*
www.games-workshop.com/gws/catalog/productDetail.jsp?prodId=prod730814&_requestid=2182102
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:15, Reply)

i have "guess who's naked"
which is a "hilarious" adult version of the kiddies' favourite (actually it IS funny that all the black guys have cocks like bratwurst and all the white guys have chippolatas), we can have a game-off.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:14, Reply)

Racism AGAINST WHITES is never funny.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:16, Reply)

this is

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:17, Reply)

My willy is tiny.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:18, Reply)

there is no need to state the obvious

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:20, Reply)

yes there is.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:21, Reply)

You'll be pwned by warhammer

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:17, Reply)

yeah yeah like you'd do anything after a MFF threesome involving unlimited chocolate
other than collapse on the floor and snore!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:18, Reply)

there is an ocean right outside
and the room has a roll-top bath and a monsoon drench shower.

there is no excuse for stinking.

we'll just cover you in chocolate to mask the smell anyway.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:13, Reply)

get a room you two.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:14, Reply)

dude
can't you read? we already HAVE the room.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:15, Reply)

You make a lovely couple.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:17, Reply)

:D Thanks for the gaz, I'll ask my mummy if I can go

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:18, Reply)

tell her we promise to have you in bed before 7

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:19, Reply)

god this work is sooooo tedious
i could do with something to give my client a big squishy hug. something like a boa constrictor.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:44, Reply)

NakedApe is another one I have had little or zero interaction with so meh.
Today we went for a walk around a roman fort and saw a couple shagging in the field.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:54, Reply)

HIS LOSS

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:56, Reply)

oh Rory, you are awful.
But I like you. I LIKE YOU A LOT.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:03, Reply)

A'int I a stinker

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:06, Reply)

A heady scent of anal musk.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:10, Reply)

yeesh
that's quite popular there innit
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 18:59, Reply)

Oh, I forgot when we were doing the sick jokes before.
How do you make a horemoan? Give the bitch a slap. (whore moan)
Did you know that 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:12, Reply)

gawd

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:18, Reply)

I remember the days when I dominated the popular page
until I insulted people so much they refused to click my posts. You know who you are.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 3 May 2011, 19:42, Reply)

Chin up PsychoChomp you were 'Champ' for a time, now that it's over you can always dine out on the memories

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 3 May 2011, 20:03, Reply)