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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(

rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)

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Americans are stupid
www.theregister.co.uk/2011/08/31/mcdonalds_woman_wooden_ipad/
Or clever depending on which american you're talking about in this story.

Only (Gooseberry) Fools and Horse (meat)
(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:39, 104 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Dull Yank bashing.
Like picking on in-breds from Milton Keynes.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:41, Reply)

You seem to be confusing your insults about milton keynes
We've got "no history" "no culture" "lots of concrete" "roundabouts" "concrete cows" that sort of thing, not known for inbreeding.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:42, Reply)

Yet you seem so good at it.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:43, Reply)

NO YOUR MUM

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:44, Reply)

You have upset my Mother now.
I suppose at least I know mine.

Your sister is your mother etc.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:46, Reply)

He seems to be confusing you with infamous Norfolk local, the web-toed bumlord
Darth Foxtrot
(

Kroney, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:44, Reply)

Butter-flies

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:41, Reply)

I don't get that one.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:41, Reply)

tv show called butterflies
butter
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:42, Reply)

I've never heard of it. Butter that is.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:44, Reply)

you're wearing it, you fool

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:45, Reply)

That happens all the time in the UK
usually with expensive speakers in a box vs bricks in a box. Why does that somehow make Americans more stupid?

Also, what the fuck are these pathetic food/comedy show puns all over the place? are you actively trying to turn this place into /talk?
(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:42, Reply)

It started here
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1337241
(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:43, Reply)

that's no fucking excuse to carry on doing it.
That's basically just the excuse used by concentration camp guards.
(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:46, Reply)

Dads Army Rations

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:47, Reply)

Soupergran

(

The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:51, Reply)

fucking hell
right, time to find something else to do then.
(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:56, Reply)

^ this ^
this thread has killed offtopic
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:59, Reply)

B-olognese-gerac

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:01, Reply)

I'm glad I could contribute

(

The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:38, Reply)

Didn't you
just try to call me out on making assumptions that any one set of people is fundamentally different to any other set of people?
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:44, Reply)

Yes but when I do it it's funny.
Anyway I was hoping for wood puns.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:45, Reply)

Oh, dear lord. Not a priapic pun-thread, please ...

(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:47, Reply)

It's being investigated by special branch

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:47, Reply)

I think he's just twigged

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:48, Reply)

Rosmary and Thyme

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:50, Reply)

Pie in the sky

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:50, Reply)

They think it's all apple turnover.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:51, Reply)

Pork the week

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:51, Reply)

Pork and Mindy!

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:52, Reply)

TFI Fried egg.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:54, Reply)

Yoggart
"thers bin a murrdar"
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:56, Reply)

Young Dumb and living off chewing gum.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:59, Reply)

Snog, Curry, Avoid

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:00, Reply)

Toast (coast)

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:01, Reply)

Woking with Dinosaurs
EDIT that's Wok-ing, not Woking, which is shit
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:01, Reply)

The Eggs files

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:03, Reply)

South Parkin.
/proud of that
(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:04, Reply)

it'll be about 3 more posts before you start with the
"truth fairy is hot. wonder if she's single" shit.
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:07, Reply)

You shouldn't be

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:08, Reply)

But might be less shit if it had some Dinosaurs?

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:07, Reply)

You're such a Beech sometimes

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:47, Reply)

Ah, OK.
Sorry, I mean, ah Oaky. I hadn't twigged. What a plank I am. Stick around and I'll try harder. Wood it be OK if you came back in a minute? I may have to branch out, but if you leaf it to me I'll come up with something.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:48, Reply)

please don't!

(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 14:58, Reply)

are you sycamore tree jokes

(

Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:00, Reply)

a mahogany all?
(am I hogging them all?)
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:04, Reply)

my eyes are actually bleeding
there is blood pouring out of them and onto the keyboard
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:06, Reply)

Poor yew

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

That went against the grain.

(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:12, Reply)

Hey - lay off, my bark is worse than my bite.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:13, Reply)

oh dear god

(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

Fawlty Tower Burger.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:06, Reply)

Soldier, Soldier
(and eggs)
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:06, Reply)

Life on Mars Bar

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:07, Reply)

Prison Break(fast)

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:08, Reply)

Quantum Leak

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:08, Reply)

that sounds disgusting, you mean Leek

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:10, Reply)

dude, this tool couldn't spell "shit" if he had his fingers sellotaped to the correct keys
and then pressed in the correct order for him.
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:16, Reply)

Maybe when he was at school he should have been given the birch.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

Would everyone mind stopping being so bent please?

Thanks
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:11, Reply)

you first

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:12, Reply)

I thought better of you.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:14, Reply)

I disagree.
Also, you'd be proud of me, I managed to get in a fight after all.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

I know you are I said you are but what am I.
What the fuck is going on here?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:16, Reply)

It's like a global gay-off to the power of ten.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:25, Reply)

That was your first mis-steak

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:18, Reply)

I do think this might be the worst thread ever

(

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:13, Reply)

psychochomp never starts good threads
they are either newslinks or him asking what he should cook for people at the weekend just to get them to spend any time with him.

but this is a particularly shit new low. i even miss bert.
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

I'd start a new thread, but i fear it will descend into puns again
instead i shall try and rewrite my CV without wanky corporate bullshit
(

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:16, Reply)

That I shall never do.
I have been taking archery lessons, you see.
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

oh dear, i shall have to ask you to kill yourself please

(

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:18, Reply)

If you spell and punctuate every post correctly for an entire month I shall do that very thing,
after first signing over my organs to Edmund for medical research. I will then fly through the air and travel through time.

All you have to do is use correct Enlish for 30 days.
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:21, Reply)

English or Enlish?

(

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:22, Reply)

Enlish.
A language I made up - so you have no chance.
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:24, Reply)

I could arrange for your petard to be unhoisted if you like, chap.

(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:24, Reply)

Thanks awfully.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:25, Reply)

haaaa!
thank god you have started to improve the place.

i am getting to the stage of almost revealing who is good and who is shit in bed on here just to liven things up.
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:18, Reply)

How many people could you out?

(

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:19, Reply)

if i made it up?
or if i told the truth?
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:20, Reply)

little bit from column a)
little bit from column b)
(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:21, Reply)

Tripe and Retribution

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:14, Reply)

If this is you trying not to be bent I have some bad news for you.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

You've got face cancer.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

The A Bream

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:16, Reply)

that would be shit
but why would it be bent? surely rectal cancer is more bent?
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:16, Reply)

Someone with rectal cancer has been sitting on his face

(

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

i think it's a girl
or did you mean monty?
(

rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Oh, I assume everyone is male until proved otherwise

(

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:21, Reply)

man, that's a left-field attempt at titgaz acquisition
almost subtle by this place's standards.
(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:27, Reply)

The cancer was incidental to the bentness, in this case.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:19, Reply)

coincidental bentness
should be a Jazz Fusion group.
(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:21, Reply)

I likeed their second album 'Incrementally bent'

(

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:22, Reply)

Thanks! It's one of our best.
Mighters' 20 min triangle solo on 'Homo Erectus' is the stuff of legend.
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:23, Reply)

It took me fucking ages to get the hang of drop de-tuning a triangle, man.

(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:25, Reply)

I'm in.
*buys beret*
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:22, Reply)

*borrows bongos*

(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:23, Reply)

Have I got Couscous for you

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:15, Reply)

I have a high powered rifled for you.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

Mother's Pride and Predjudice

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Hovis met your mother

(PsychoChomp, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:20, Reply)

Jesus fucking titty christ
would you two just get a room?

then, ideally, seal the windows and doors and introduce a malfunctioning gas fire?
(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:22, Reply)

this is fucking awesome

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:23, Reply)

yes. yes it is.

(

the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:25, Reply)

I actually guffawed. In the office. Oops.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 31 Aug 2011, 15:16, Reply)

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