Woh', really? You must be really really unwell.
What kind of cake do you like?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:48, 1 reply, 14 years ago)

Lemon cake, coffee cake, vanilla cake
I love lots of cake.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:49, Reply)

I bet you like caterpiller cake
I bet you could squish two or three between your toes during a really good session.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:52, Reply)

Caterpillar cake is fucking win

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:53, Reply)

I disagree
except for the chocolate face and feet
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:56, Reply)

Last time I bought a £4.99 ASDA Chocolate Catpillia cake, I took it to a b4sh for everyone; everyone likes cake, so why not?
But I looked in with absolute horror when the first slice, the slice with the fondont head, got cut off. I saw them slice it down and watched it fall over, while I was using my strongest mind power going "Nononono, don't you dare give that slice to someone else", you see, I couldn't say anything, because I'd look like a right fucking autistic internet fatty if I demanded the head piece, which is without a doubt the best one (every single bite has some fondunt !). You know when you give someone 'evils' willing them to do something, knowing that if it was possible for someone to read your thoughts, they would read the shouting going on in your head, and this would be the perfect time to transmit my phsycicness "Give Me The Head PIece". But then, the person who cut the slice, puts it on a plate, and eats it ! Can you believe it? The cake cutter cut off the best bit on the whole cake and served it to themselves ! Fucking prick, should have glassed the cunt with an ashtray while he's doing a piss in an allyway.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:01, Reply)

Can we take caterpiller cakes into the sushi restaurant?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:02, Reply)

I don't see why not, but I'm bagsying the head piece this time, I'm gonna speak up my mind and speak up for my god given devine heritage... I want the head bit.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:04, Reply)

Keep a glass ashtray to hand, just in case...

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:14, Reply)

As a child, one of the most vicious battles
in our family was over who got the white chocolate face off the caterpillar cake
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:06, Reply)

Deffo, that slice is an honor bestowed upon whoever is the subject of the occasion.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:08, Reply)

Even funerals?

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:10, Reply)

"...And that's why I'm banned from all future open casket funerals."

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:14, Reply)

We weren't allowed sweets
so I have no doubt our battles were specially vicious and unlimited by any petty considerations such as whose birthday it was
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:12, Reply)

Coffee cake = crime against humanity
As is fruit cake, in my experience.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:55, Reply)

You're completely wrong on both counts

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Every fruit cake I've ever had has been dry and dense, not enjoyable in the slightest.
That's why I haven't eaten it in years.

And coffee is inferior to Tea.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:58, Reply)

You are wrong on that last point
they are both equal, the winner is determined by the time at which you are drinking them.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 9:59, Reply)

Coffee = never

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:00, Reply)

Your face = Munchy Box*

*In both senses of the word
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:01, Reply)

Fatty, greasy, would be helped by a good battering?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:06, Reply)

I was gonne go with, unpleasant to look at, randomly hairy
and full of your own spunk.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:09, Reply)

I wasn't even aware I could self fellate...

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:14, Reply)

I'm referring to the "munchy box"

(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:15, Reply)

Just got that, ahh fuck.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:17, Reply)

I think most men know whether they can do this or not.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:16, Reply)

It's all so clear now...
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1377375
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:18, Reply)

HAHAHA!!!

(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:20, Reply)

Sporto is married with two kids
You can't blame him for trying
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:24, Reply)

I think if I could do that, I wouldn't swallow, and I wouldn't kiss myself afterwards until I brush my teeth.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:38, Reply)

If Christmas Pudding was nice, people would have them more than once a year and wouldn't need to drown it in brandy and creme.
OH MY DAYZ, last christmas, I had a real hankering for marks'n'sparks brandy cornish clotted creme over microwaved mince pies.

Today, this evening, I shall recreate this pleasure.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:06, Reply)

Christmas pudding is delicious
Christmas dessert of choice, though people unbelievably opted for cheesecake last year
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:07, Reply)

I wonder if you could combine cheesecake and christmas pud?
For the last, like, 5 years, I've wanted to try frying christmas pudding in butter. I saw Heston Bloomingtile do it, but the thing is, all the left overs end up going to Debs and Aunty Barbera, and even though I'm one of the "Single people who lives by themselves", I _never_ get left overs, and I'm growing very very bitter about the whole thing. Like, seriously bitter. Last year I sliced off some really crispy bits of fat on the duck, then put them behind all the bottles of pickles in the fridge, and STILL they went missing. 4 years in a row now I've been neglected. AND WHATS WORST, right, is that Aunty Sonya (Deb's mum) declaired last year that Debs was supposed to get all the spare duck because Sonya bought it.

Even though I bought and made an entire course, I was to be a second class citizan in my own mother's house.

I've given up expecting any leftovers this year, they can take the lot for all I care, don't cry for me, I'm already dead inside.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:14, Reply)

You should come for dinner at my in laws instead,
You can spend the entire dinner staring at my sister in laws knockers and drinking wine.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Do you have mulled wine? I love that stuff, tastes like spicy ribeena.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:22, Reply)

If you want mulled wine Gonz
I will make mulled wine.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:28, Reply)

I have these mulled wine teabags
that I bought in France where they take that shit seriously. You just pour in your wine, add some sugar, add a teabag or two and warm it up.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:28, Reply)

Oh man, yes please.
And do you think that Marks'n'Sparks have started doing their chocolate port yet? I'll bring some of that if they do. I bought two bottles last year, but Sexface drank them both and didn't replace them.

Oh god, I really sound like a whiney "OH WOE IS ME, I'M SO HARD DONE BY" person today.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:33, Reply)

We got some Mulled Wine Tea from Whittards last year
It's lovely stuff
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:30, Reply)

The thing is, they know that I'm really funny about eating in front of people, and that I can't really eat a lot in one go...
... that I normally have my meal over a few hours, just grazing, rather than scoffing the lot. I can't eat lots of food 'en mass. So I make up my plate, and have some, and then leave it for a bit, have a fag, have a bit more... so the left overs are more important to me because I've only had like 1/4 of a meal. But the other "Aww, moi pour baybi, live by your own? No love in your life? Well, here's a plate of cold food, that might make things better"ers get to stuff their gobs TWICE.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:19, Reply)

You could just ask for them?
And I've had Christmas pudding cheesecake. It was okay, not brilliant though.

Alternatively, pile your plate with three times the amount, eat what you like and clingfilm the rest
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:19, Reply)

That's the thing ! I do !
I ask for them, I talk about them, I say what I want to do with them, talk about them for ages and ages.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:19, Reply)

I agree
I can't stand the stuff, although it is far better than standard fruit cake.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:08, Reply)

Oh cool, I do a lovely lemon drizzle cake. Really sharp lemon syrup soaking through it.
I think I might on the way to work go to Costa, they do a fucking lush banana cupcake thing.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:03, Reply)

Lemon Drizzle cake is wonderful

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 10:05, Reply)