Elevenses
Morning all, been stuck in phone calls all morning and doing lots of w*rk. Bastards. However, I've taken delivery of a bacon and egg sandwich and a jam doughnut and pub time is calling soon.

Best day of the working week and why? Worst day and why?

Alt:
Weekend plans? Lunch? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:12, 128 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

sorry, decided not to contribute to this thread

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:15, Reply)

I do like the way you are sure to notify us.
Saves us getting our hopes up. It's considerate.
( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:17, Reply)

wouldn't want to let the team down

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:18, Reply)

So have you been away Truthy, or have you been moonlighting as Quentin?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:19, Reply)

Quentin looks like a retard
thanks for that, glad I joined in this thread now
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:22, Reply)

I've missed yoooooou

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:20, Reply)

you too babe
how's tricks?
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:21, Reply)

Good, I have another hilarious failure with women to tell the board about

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:21, Reply)

oh please go on!

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:22, Reply)

I invited a girl I know up for the weekend to do the stuff mentioned below.
Her response after about an hour was "oh sorry I forgot to reply I was too busy playing scrabble"
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:23, Reply)

You sure know all the exciting women, Chompy

( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:24, Reply)

It's ok, it was only applebite

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:25, Reply)

Did she agree to go, once she'd finished scrabbling?

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

Nah she said she wants to come to another retro night next month
but to be honest I was only using her to make another girl jealous so increadibly maturely I'm now not bothered.
/she was aware of this
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:28, Reply)

the only thing missing from your plan
was success
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:29, Reply)

you forgot pride

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

haha
click
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

If it wasn't for my failures I wouldn't have anything to talk about online.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:32, Reply)

Casandwichnova
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:33, Reply)

RomOreo

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:46, Reply)

LOVE it
mine was poor
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:57, Reply)

custud
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:59, Reply)

how have you overtaken me as the queen on the puns?

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:01, Reply)

Practice!

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:02, Reply)

Oh, no great loss then!

( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

*spiderman theme*
Friend zone, friend zone, chompy's stuck, in the friend zone.
Can he watch, her undress? Will she let, him touch her breast?
Yes he can, 'cus he ain't a threat.
Watch out, chompy's in the friendly zone.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:36, Reply)

I did an office lol at that
now I want to kill myself.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Hah, it'll be stuck in your head now.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:40, Reply)

two almost dates in two weeks?
you internet stud, you
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

I'm very charming and witty

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

You forgot suave

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:27, Reply)

that too

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:29, Reply)

Go on then. It'll cheer me up.

( girlinthehole, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:22, Reply)

I'm going to a gig and then a retro night tonight
Watching the fireworks and a suprise birthday party tomorrow.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:21, Reply)

What is the gig?
trying to shoehorn in a boring music thread here
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Local bands I think
Hidden Image, supported by Brothers & Bones and my mates band Final Clearance.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Listening to Rebound right now
I'll be honest, I'm not a fan so far...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:46, Reply)

Synth Song is worse
I'm sure your friend is lovely and all, but their band isn't.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:49, Reply)

I think they're good :(

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:54, Reply)

Perhaps it is unfair of me to judge them on one and a half songs (didn't make it to the end of Synth Song)
But there was nothing new or particularly interesting about them. I'm sure they put on a very slick live show.
Do you think you would feel the same about them if you didn't know any of them?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:57, Reply)

I think so, but it's hard to say that.
I think they're better than playing pubs though.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:02, Reply)

Sadly (for them) they are unlikely to progress beyond that.
And that is not just a reflection of my opinion of their music, just an unfortunate truth.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:06, Reply)

wtf is this shit?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

olith
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:37, Reply)

Elevenses are always a tempting idea, but I'm pretty sure that adding an extra meal into the day is a surefire way to becoming a fatty
Unsurprisingly the best day of the working week is Friday - I get to leave at 3pm, I get to collect my son from school and I don't really do any work.

Alt: Record night tonight, some lame celebration of failed terrorist attacks tomorrow night.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:26, Reply)

elevenses? a new lunchtime low!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

hi swipey

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

where have you been?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

beginning of the month, work's always really busy

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:32, Reply)

that's a lame excuse

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:39, Reply)

she could tell you
but then she'd have to kill you.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:32, Reply)

badger!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:39, Reply)

yes, petal?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:39, Reply)

oh, nothing
now i have your attention, i don't want it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:40, Reply)

Haha, textbook XX chromosoming, there.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:42, Reply)

If you don't know what she wants, she's certainly not going to tell you.
God! Don't you even know her at all? Has she been wasting her time all these years?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:45, Reply)

Woah, that's the bar raised.
I'd say that's London 2012 qualifying level. Congratulations ;)
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:48, Reply)

oooh you sexist sexist pig

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:48, Reply)

ah, don't you worry your pretty little head about it.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:50, Reply)

it's more beautiful than pretty

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:51, Reply)

Textbook XXX chromosoming, you mean
oooh, zing
( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:49, Reply)

ha, he wishes!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:51, Reply)

Oh dear
No, an extra chromosome gives you Downs. I was calling you a disabled.

Good job you totally didn't just live up to it, there.
( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:52, Reply)

even an internet shut-in like you
knows that XXX means hawt.

so there!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:53, Reply)

I thought it was something to do with mints

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:54, Reply)

Error
Downs is trisomy 21. If you're going to zing people, get your facts right. Trisomy X does very little because instead of having one X chromosome inactivated, you simply have two which are inactivated.
(berk, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:05, Reply)

WHAT?

( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:07, Reply)

She called you a cunt

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:08, Reply)

Sorry, thick cunt.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:08, Reply)

Oh right.

( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:11, Reply)

Chromosomes, right
You have 23 pairs of them: 22 autosomal ones and 1 pair that determine sex.
If you have three copies of chromosome 21 you have Downs. Three copies of X does essentially bugger all.
(berk, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:10, Reply)

Oh you pesky scientists and your slavish devotion to fact.
You should be like me, playing fast and loose with the rules. I toy with them, but they never catch me, man.
( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:38, Reply)

While we're being pedantic about science, how about English too?
If something is a fact, then it is right. If his point was incorrect, then it is not a fact.
You might consider using "get your facts straight", or perhaps highlighting his error by using quotation marks, or simply using another word.
Hope this helps.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:16, Reply)

got brunch?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:32, Reply)

i need to come up with a new way to get a tttention, going back to talk now

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:34, Reply)

Alt.
Same as we do every weekend, Pinky. try to take over the world drinking and hockey.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:34, Reply)

huh
i thought YOU were the pinky??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:39, Reply)

I would be the Brain.
If the brain was allowed to be slowly pickled in gin and wine.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:40, Reply)

and stabbed with a Q-Tip

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:48, Reply)

Something d.o.o economics?
Every other working day is followed by another so it has to be Friday. I'm going out for lunch soon to buy a tune baguette, alcohol and some sparklers. Most of those things are for later.

Alt: Bonfire and fireworks at the local park tonight and a quiet weekend preparing for the next one.

When did trainers start using two sets of laces? This confuses my puny human mind. Are you supposed to keep tying them together until you've got a gargantuball of laces that your jeans don't fit over? /newtrainersfail
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:36, Reply)

are you sure they aren't different colours
as a kind of "option" ? If so, take one set out. I've no idea, mind you, but the last set of converse I bought had two sets in for that exact purpose.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:39, Reply)

the second set is to hang yourself
you should post them to quentin
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:40, Reply)

I did wonder why they came with a stamped addressed envelope.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:43, Reply)

so that he can kill himself...

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:48, Reply)

You might be entirely correct here
*hides feet under desk*
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:41, Reply)

I quite like Mondays, as it's rarely particularly busy for me, unlike the rest of the week.
Friday afternoon is always good though!

Alt: None whatsoever, I was originally going to be seeing several b3tans, but my finances have just taken a kicking, so I'll leave it for the month.

I have no idea what I'm on for lunch yet, ah well.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:36, Reply)

Mondays are the worst, because I have computers for spastics
Sunday is probably the best for me. Even though it's a stupidly early start, I get finished by lunchtime, then sleep for the whole afternoon, and there's the pub quiz in the evening. If only all working days were like that.

Alt: sitting inside with the curtains closed and the TV on full volume so the dog doesn't notice the fireworks outside.
I get to go out to lunch today. *fidgets excitedly*
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:44, Reply)

Any day I have to work, rather than indulging my various hobbies
is the worst day of the working week. I resent working for a living extremely.

Alt: I am going to be out a fair bit this weekend. It seems being single gives you an active social life. Who knew?
( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:45, Reply)

Wednesday as my boss isn't in
I get the same amount of work done but I don't have to go to so much effort to disguise the non-work parts.

Or Friday for sausage and egg butty delivery and end of week attitude.

Alt: poker night for a mate's birthday. She normally drinks Tia Maria but I've got her a bottle of Toussaint instead just to surprise.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:47, Reply)

UNRELATED SUPREME IRONY POST
My boss, whilst failing to grasp a really very simple thing I was saying to him, has just informed me that I am talking 'gobbledigooch'. I think this may be a cricket reference but am unsure.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:50, Reply)

a gay cricket reference by the sound of it

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:51, Reply)

Indeed. The worst kind.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:52, Reply)

Something about Darth performing sex acts on ex-cricketers?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:52, Reply)

sorry
i beat you to it
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:52, Reply)

S'ok, I was a little out of my depth with sport references anyway

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:54, Reply)

Timing isn't everything, mind,
Badgo's late entry down there seems to be better than yours. I'm assuming that the detail in his is accurate to the sport in some way.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:59, Reply)

I'm sure Graham loved it

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:53, Reply)

don't judge him by your standards!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:53, Reply)

It refers to a little-know rule from the 1980s
where for a while, a 12th method of dismissal was listed in the laws of cricket, that of being dismissed for being caught in the changing room fellating a mostachio'd England opening batsmen.

The law was removed by the ICC in 2001.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:55, Reply)

Ah, I see. Thanks

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:56, Reply)

DELETER!
I was replying to your job rant there!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:57, Reply)

Sorry, it was both gay and woe-is-me so it had to go.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:04, Reply)

I like Thursdays.
Though Thursdays this term knock me out, I got into bed and slept for a couple of hours when I got back yesterday.

I'm waiting for a washing machine delivery and I hope they don't expect me to help carry it down the stairs.

Alt: Fireworks in Blackheath. I just had breakfast. I might get something else to eat though. I'm well hungry.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:51, Reply)

Last time I had a washing machine delivered, my housemate and I had to take it in turns to sleep, as we'd only slept about an hour between both of us the night before
Then the fucker didn't show up until 3pm!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:54, Reply)

Then boy was he a "lucky Pierre"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:57, Reply)

Is that the "sandwich" you are having for elevenses?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:13, Reply)

Friday is obviously the best day
it's cake and pub day.

I'm going to sit in a damp field and watch fireworks and lasers whilst somebody plays Pink Floyd really loudly, whilst stuffing my face with sausages and cider. Winner.
(berk, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:08, Reply)

I want sausages now,
even though I made 40 meatballs last night.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:11, Reply)

Hehe
n +e
( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:14, Reply)

Pike Floyd?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:40, Reply)

It took me a while too
But I think "the joke" is: Wiener.
Or did you already know that and I have missed yet another "the joke"?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:41, Reply)

I looked, couldn't see it, posted
And then crawled the entire post for 'n's until I figured it out.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:46, Reply)

I feel that Kroney hasn't just let me down, nor just /ot
But he's let himself down.

+onto a subzero botdog
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:50, Reply)

He is as disappointing as this thread has turned out to be.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:52, Reply)

All by myseeeeeelf...
Don't wanna be...

Have you all fucked off home?
( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:30, Reply)

I thought it was just me

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:31, Reply)

Oh I see, you'd rather be all by yourself then...
Charming.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:34, Reply)

People keep calling and I'm on my own at the minute.
Stupid Fridays are usually quiet.
( Kroney, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:35, Reply)

It's ok, you don't need to make excuses, I'm not offended.
*sniffs*
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:40, Reply)

No, but it's been dull and I have work to do
so I pop in, see nothings going on and get back to work.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:33, Reply)

Too passive an approach Quey
You need to shake this thread up and make something happen. Probably.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:34, Reply)

Or start a new thread

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:36, Reply)

Who? Him or me?
I got nothing...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:40, Reply)

Tend to agree
However, as mentioned I have work to pretend to do and no inspiration today. Might see if I have any ideas at lunch time.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:44, Reply)

I'm eating mine right now
Does this mean I should start a new thread to ask what everyone else is having?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:53, Reply)

Dear god no.
Started one now.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 4 Nov 2011, 13:00, Reply)

All the days are the same
though I do like Wednesdays.

Alt: I was going to head down to Brighton, catch up with my brother, see some fireworks, then head to London for college drinks and maybe seeing Lampito and Charmander on the Monday. To do this I need to book some tickets.

Lunch is the supremely boring soup, supplemented by a profiterole
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 12:56, Reply)

That's the pastry that makes bakers the most money.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 13:01, Reply)