I reckon most people on here are secret swingers
and there is a secret calendar where all the cliquey members plot orgies and try and convince Tutt and Madam Marlboro to join in.
( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 14:56, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

hang on,
I remember being linked to an event on calendar that was a fetish swing thing.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 14:57, Reply)

Me too
It was everyone but Wormulus invited
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 14:59, Reply)

Imagine if everyone turned up
Just pause and imagine it.

You'd have BGB naked in the same room as Piston Broke.
( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:00, Reply)

I don't know who Piston Broke is

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:00, Reply)

Replace the words Piston Broke with
baldmonkey
( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:02, Reply)

Or more simply replace with 'any b3tan'

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:05, Reply)

Imagine Sexface getting down and dirty with Clendrix
whist Gonzo tugged off over b3rt's tits.
( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:06, Reply)

Why did you just make me think of sexface soing anything at all?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:07, Reply)

And now I've remembered that he shagged Lampito.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:07, Reply)

I don't know who Sexface is either

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:09, Reply)

You live a lucky life cow.

( girlinthehole, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:11, Reply)

It would seem so!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:12, Reply)

He was single handedly responsible for getting Catface and CHCB together.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:12, Reply)

Maybe I should borrow him and get him to pretend to make advances.

( girlinthehole, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:14, Reply)

Was that due to CHCB desperately trying to not be accosted by Sexface?
Genius.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Pretty much, yeah.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:21, Reply)

I'd like to think my toilet played a small, yet significant part in that event.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:21, Reply)

posts as jimbob sometimes I think
did terrible terrible standup 'comedy'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:02, Reply)

Be glad.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:02, Reply)

I echo this sentiment.

( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:03, Reply)

All eyes would be on my amazing muff.

( girlinthehole, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:02, Reply)

*irl boke*

( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:03, Reply)

My work here is done.

( girlinthehole, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:04, Reply)

Do you put your hands in it to keep them warm on cold days?
Is it coloured like a Dalmation?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:03, Reply)

Muff Diving 101

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:04, Reply)

Who is tutt?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 14:59, Reply)

Top Up The Tea
I've seen her on some bash photos
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 14:59, Reply)

Unwilling recipient of lots of pandering.

( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 14:59, Reply)

I would suggest
unwilling possibly, but if she didn't want the sweaty-handed cockgazzing her it probably wasn't the cleverest move in the world to link to her Flickr pool here..
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:02, Reply)

Who would have thought that the internet is populated entirely by needy virgins with no social skills

( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:05, Reply)

who indeed.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:05, Reply)

Good point well made.

( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:07, Reply)

I shall agree with you, because, of course, this implies that I am not a fat sweaty, needy virgin.
Oh no, perish the thought.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:07, Reply)

But we know that Wormulus is a real hit with women.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:09, Reply)

Its the mouth that makes it.

( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:12, Reply)

Yes, I've seen him in action.
it was.... impressive
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:12, Reply)

The trick is to find the one thing in their life which they are most insecure about
and then mercilessly bully them about it until they convince themselves that sleeping with me is somehow 'getting their own back'.

N.B only works on b3tans.
( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:14, Reply)

It's actually worked?
Wow, I'm impressed
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:15, Reply)

it generally works very well with the needy and insecure
the problem is, it requires you to be an utter cunt to people.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:18, Reply)

This must be why I have yet to loose my V plates
Well I can go to my fat, sweaty, virginal grave secure in the knowledge that I was the better man.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:19, Reply)

*lose

( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:24, Reply)

You can actually get all the being a cunt out of the way in the first minute or so
It helps if you already have a reputation as an arrogant cunt but loyal followers who will tell everyone 'He's really nice once you get to know him'.

All my posts on b3ta are basically a vast web of lies created to entrap nerdy girls who don't know how to wear makeup properly.
( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:21, Reply)

I've got to make tracks
we can continue this later.
( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:24, Reply)

well, duh.
I think most of us knew that. What impresses most is that the women know that too and yet still fall for it. One of life's many mysteries.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:25, Reply)

Interestingly you seem to giving the textbook b3tan signs that you desire me sexually.

( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Take me Wormo, take me now.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:20, Reply)

..and they are?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:20, Reply)

Reflecting my approach.
Talking about me a lot.
( WormuIus, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:23, Reply)

I see

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:23, Reply)

I have no idea what reflecting means in this context
but I barley talk about you at all these days.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:29, Reply)

But you do deliver corny lines with a rye smile

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:39, Reply)

Do I?
Good, good, not sure what bearing this has on my desire for hot gay sex with Wormy boy though.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:42, Reply)

top up the tea.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:00, Reply)

Oh I remember seeing some pictures of her.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:01, Reply)

I still don't understand how Damion managed to pull so much.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:14, Reply)

I know
Blur were shite
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:16, Reply)

they were quite fun
not worth the hype, but what ever is?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:17, Reply)

Tayyabs

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:18, Reply)

aparently that's gone down hill
Needos is the place to go now.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:20, Reply)

It was worth the hype when I went
Needoos will be the next one
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:21, Reply)

Tayyabs is still great
but Needoo is the fucking bomb.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:27, Reply)

Needos was good when I went
but I was too drunk to really appreciate it. *shakes fist at Monty and his Brandy*
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:27, Reply)

Hang on a sec
What did you eat in there??
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:40, Reply)

curry type stuff.
I asked for a cress sandwitch but they didn't have it.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:41, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Mon 19 Dec 2011, 15:46, Reply)