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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Big day on thursday!
Im getting my hurr did, getting my braces off and having a birthday party.
big day coming up for you?

Alt: jewelry
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:45, 218 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
Flying to Malaysia tuesday!!1

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:46, Reply)
What, for real?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:52, Reply)
Fo sho,
going to a wedding.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:52, Reply)
thats cool! Have fun

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:54, Reply)
I friggin will,
I'll be eating loads of food and arseing about on the beach.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:57, Reply)
Don't do too much arsing they are pretty fiercly muslamic down there

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:58, Reply)
woohoohoo!
nothing exciting coming up for me. I have a house warming party in a couple of weeks though
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:48, Reply)
that is exciting, congrats!

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:54, Reply)
VALANTINES DAY TOMORROW

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:49, Reply)
woohoo

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:55, Reply)
WILL YOU GO OUT WITH ME?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:56, Reply)
Chicks love the CAPSLOCK

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:58, Reply)
I'M IN HERE

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:00, Reply)
Shit, Quintin's in the crawl space again

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)
he's everywhere man, he's coming out the GODDAMN walls

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:02, Reply)
"3 metres... 2 metres... that can't be right, according to this he's right on top of us"

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
totally read that as 'cockslap'.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:28, Reply)
Not really, got a few gigs coming up, and I'm at a b3tan housewarming in about 3 weeks time
Aside from that, nothing much going on with me at the minute.

Alt: The only thing even close to jewellery I wear is my watch.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:49, Reply)
after all the rants ive had,i shouldn't say this but I want to go to a gig

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:53, Reply)
I don't think you'd like these ones K

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:57, Reply)
I have bruises and a sore neck from Mastodon

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:58, Reply)
Hilarious strikethrough about wanking

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:59, Reply)
LOL*


*not really
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:00, Reply)
Good gig then?
My friend saw them last Monday, said they were incredible
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:10, Reply)
Yeah really good, the support was good as well
Dillinger Escape Plan and Red fang
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:12, Reply)
I'm yet to be impressed by Dillinger Escape Plan, I know a lot of people who rave about them, but I just don't see it.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:16, Reply)
Well I don't really listen to them, but live they were incredible

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:17, Reply)
I'm not sure I can top these exciting events you have coming up.
Alt: What about jewellery?
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:56, Reply)
How much can you fit under your foreskin when trying to avoid Russian Secret Police?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:57, Reply)
When my foreskin is blinged up I don't hide it from anyone.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:58, Reply)
Faberge would be so proud

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:59, Reply)
Does it smell of egg then?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:35, Reply)
i like foreskin, and jewelry

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 15:59, Reply)
Another reason to come to the UK, we have more foreskins per head than the US, FACTBOMB

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:00, Reply)
you shouldn't really have foreskin on your head
perhapd on your forehead, though
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:06, Reply)
More than me, I'd wager

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:11, Reply)
oh man did anyone else see jamelias breasts on room 101 last night
cor and all that
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:00, Reply)
Why would you put jamelia's breasts into room 101
How would the So Solid Crew feed?
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)
i don't understand what your saying, but i agree

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:01, Reply)
nod and smile, just nod and smile

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:02, Reply)
yes, jamelias breasts, of course

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:02, Reply)
I like her.
Is she a reality telly person? I've only ever seen her on never mind the buzzcocks. She's quite sweet for a brummie. And she has smashing breasts.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:07, Reply)
thats all true, i don't think she's a reality thing
she was a pop star, might still be
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:10, Reply)
this is her one and only hit of all time
www.youtube.com/watch?v=_egs4VXHLYYQ
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:11, Reply)
Nice one playa.
Getting your braces off is the best feeling in the world.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:03, Reply)
i cant wait to properly floss

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:05, Reply)
You eyeing it up for scrap?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:06, Reply)
I wish I'd had spasticated horse gnashers then I could have the pleasure of having a contraption removed from my gob.
Sadly I have a lovely set of human teeth.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:08, Reply)
It means you can eat ribs again, I'd missed them so much.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:12, Reply)
maybe you should get them reattached, tubby

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:13, Reply)
hahaha

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:14, Reply)
I haven't eaten ribs in years, turns out they weren't as good as I remembered them to be

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:15, Reply)
cos i'm such a nice person i'm not gonna post what i nearly posted here
your welcome
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:18, Reply)
gaz me

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:19, Reply)
no
yuo creepy pervert
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)
Dead mums ribs obviously, it's quentin, he is predictable.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:32, Reply)
your sick, i was gonna make more jokes about him being aft

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:33, Reply)
You should post this story in this week's QOTW

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)
oh yeah

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)
This is pretty cool
www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-17012968
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:13, Reply)
Now poor people have no excuses at all

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:15, Reply)
Apart from you know, having to have enough time to do it,
enough money to pay for a computer and internet connection etc.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:16, Reply)
What about thick people?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:17, Reply)
And lazy people?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:18, Reply)
Well they should fuck off back to pakistan
stupid woman
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:18, Reply)
and people
with audio or kinesthetic learning styles...zzzzzzzzzzzz
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:22, Reply)
No it's not.
Unless 'cool' is the new word for 'dull as piss'.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:22, Reply)
Yes.
I've invited myself to your birthday and am currently packing my bags!

Alt: In my b-boy years I used to sport what is known as 'truck jewellery'. This involved a substantial weight of silver round my neck and wrists. One bracelet I had weighed so much I had to take it off to DJ. I looked like a penis.

Nowadays I sport two hefty silver skull rings (or would if I hadn't lost one of them in my flat). I look like a penis.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:20, Reply)
You are never too old for skull rings

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:22, Reply)
This is what I explained to my mother on the weekend.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:22, Reply)
you'll always have a skull

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:24, Reply)
unless you're over 14

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:23, Reply)
No-one told this chap:
www.courtsandhackett.com/keiths_ring.html
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:25, Reply)
and it proves my point beyond any doubt

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:25, Reply)
You're right.
Keith Richards isn't cool.

*does proper belm-with-fliddy-arm-wave combo*
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:27, Reply)
maybe like 40 years ago, but he's way too old now
and that little girl he was banging, yuck
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:28, Reply)
You're thinking of Woody Allen.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:30, Reply)
no keith was knocking uglies with some girl of about 19 it was really horrible
i saw it in heat magazine
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:31, Reply)
oh wait it was ronnie wood, but they're practically the same person

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:35, Reply)
He was in a superb band call the Birds in the mid-60s*.
Because of The Byrds they had to change their name to...'Birds Birds' which really is incredibly shit isn't it?

*best tune 'Say Those Magic Words'
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:38, Reply)
i like nickelback

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:39, Reply)
God me too.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:42, Reply)
i like photograph and rock star
and how you remind me, i don't like the explicit lyrics in S.E.X tho
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:44, Reply)
Or this one:
crazypigdesigns.blogspot.com/2010/05/iggy-pop-skull-ring.html
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)
he was alright til he did adverts

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)
He's much more alright now than he was between about 1975 and 1990
when he was proper shit with terrible hair and hanging out with that cunt Bowie.

'The Passenger'?
'China Girl'?

No thanks Jim.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:28, Reply)
i liked passenger and lust for life and mask

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:29, Reply)
I didn't.
Siouxsie and the Banshees did a great cover of The Passenger though.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:30, Reply)
of which one?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:30, Reply)
Edited.
Soz.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:30, Reply)
i liked the wesley snipes film passenger 87 too

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:31, Reply)
My pal recorded a song with Iggy Pop*.
He practically shat himself with excitement when he met him. Tried to take a picture of him with his arm round him and fucked up: he has a picture of his own arm to show the grandchildren. I pretended not to find this hilarious.

*www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzZzDbRp3z4
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:36, Reply)
my mum met susannah from brookside

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:37, Reply)
My mum's actress mate was in Crossroads.
Unfortunately I mean the shit TV show, not the 'blues Karate Kid' 80s lol-fest of the same name.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:40, Reply)
i saw les dennis at a function once

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:41, Reply)
I can't top this.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:42, Reply)
I can.
I served Mike Nolan a cup of tea in a pub once. I don't think he's allowed alcohol now he's retarted.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:44, Reply)
i saw that simon guy who was on the radio in the 80s at an airport

EDIt Mayo, it was Simon Mayo
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:45, Reply)
No, he's too famous, sorry.
He still does a radio 2 show, a film show on radio 5 AND he's about to start hosting Blockbusters.

Mike Nolan just drinks tea, argues about who has the right to use the name Bucks Fizz and drools a lot.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:47, Reply)
I saw 80s pop sensation Paul Young at Heathrow once.
He was wearing a hat which he took off and put on the desk. Unless he was LYING in his lyrics that therefore meant that he now lives in Heathrow airport.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:47, Reply)
penelope keith stole our lawnmower

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:48, Reply)
Airport spot #2
I saw The Cheeky Girls at Malaga airport. That was life.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:48, Reply)
i saw doctor fox in1996

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:49, Reply)
...where he still lives to this very day

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
I saw Valerie Singleton in Birmingham Airport
Top that.

(with glitter and sticky backed plastic)
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:02, Reply)
I know Ben from A1
he is a cunt
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:49, Reply)
I'll bet you do.
I'M SAYING YOU ARE BENT.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:49, Reply)
toby anstis caused a swingball accident which cost my brother four of the fingers on his left hand

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
AA was sexually abused by Neil Buchanan between the ages of 6 and 13

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:51, Reply)
sean maguire repainted my grandad's bedroom

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:52, Reply)
My pal Mat had a wardrobe delivered by Stewpot from Grange Hill.
All of mine bar the AA one are actually true.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)

ages of 6 and 13 bumcheeks
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:02, Reply)
Hahahahah
^ Childish lol of the day
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)
The guy who plays the nasty old English rapist in Braveheart drinks in my local

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:54, Reply)
The weasally cockney man from 'Lock Stock'
drinks in the Yucatan Bar in Stoke Newington
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)
I wanted to speak to this chap and Say i recognised him as the nasty old rapist from Braveheart
but I was told in no uncertain terms not to : (
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:59, Reply)
In case he raped you?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:01, Reply)
My brother went out with the girl who played Adele Murray in Brookside

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:45, Reply)
Your brother sounds like as big a liar as mine.
Mine does actually exist though so I'm still winning.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:52, Reply)
They went to the same school, it's not out of the realms of possibility

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:02, Reply)
Your brother did not go to the same school as mine.
Now YOU'RE doing it too.

STOP WITH THE LYING, OK?
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:07, Reply)
I mean my brother went to the same school as her.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:08, Reply)
Backpedalling AND lying, AA?
I thought better of you, I really did.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:28, Reply)
Yes. You are.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:31, Reply)
ive got one to wear with my party dress

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:33, Reply)
sofa arrives in 3/4 of an hour!
man, my life is ordinary
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:26, Reply)
Set fire to it as they deliver it to spice things up bit

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:28, Reply)
might be the only way to get it through the door

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:29, Reply)
The B3tan of the sofa world

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:36, Reply)
You could dance round it and tell them you are Lord of the dance settee.
That would liven the delivery up.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:38, Reply)
for some reason the woman in the shop already thinks I'm crazy
when she asked "miss, Mrs or Ms" and I said "Ms" she said she thought I would be. I think I was insulted there, I'm not sure
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:43, Reply)
I don't even know what Ms means

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:46, Reply)
to me it means
"fuck off defining me by my marital status"

I used it when I was married, too
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:48, Reply)
To me it means
"I'm really bitter about my marital status"
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
or 'I AM A LEZZA' and an angry one at that

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:50, Reply)
my headmistress was a Ms and she was obviously a massive lezzer
got your back, homes
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:52, Reply)
I see you've learnt about editing posts on the popular page.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:52, Reply)
yeah it was soo cool

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:53, Reply)
but why does anyone give a fuck about
my marital status when I pay for a bill or something? Boys don't get asked if they are married or not all the time
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:53, Reply)
I do, mainly by chicks after a little action.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:55, Reply)
popular in the coop are you?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)
he's cock of the walk in there

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:57, Reply)
It's a single coated peanut sweet.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:51, Reply)
Basically it means either "spinster" or "divorcee"

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:53, Reply)
or "married a guy with a shit surname"
i have 2 married friends who use ms + maiden name for that exact reason.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:07, Reply)
Is it wrong that i want to make this?
www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/gallery/2012/feb/08/how-to-make-a-doner-kebab#/?picture=385573540&index=0
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:38, Reply)
No.
I saw that a couple of days ago and thought the same. I haven't had a kebab in years, and I think making it myself might be the only way I'd ever trust one again now.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:42, Reply)
Nothing wrong with that.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:43, Reply)
I rather fancy a go at that myself.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:51, Reply)
Or just go here:
www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/12/jay-rayner-restaurant-pitt-cue

yes, I'm bored of work and reading the Guardian's food section watcha gonna do about it?
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)
Best kebabs I've had:
www.mangal1.com/
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:00, Reply)
Well if it's good enough for a young Saddam hussain, it's good enough for me
www.mangal1.com/gallery.htm
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:04, Reply)
Mein Gott!
Talk about a celebrity endorsement.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)
Thanks for a glorious feast Mangal
It was even better than Scud-u-like in Bagdhad.

Love, Saddam.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:14, Reply)
Might just buy mince
rather than buy lamb breast and a mincer.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:56, Reply)
I didn't even know lambs had tits

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:57, Reply)
Precisely what I thought.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 16:59, Reply)
Poncy fucking chefs.
He looks easily smug enough to be the sort of person to mince his own meat, too.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:01, Reply)
The fucking mincer.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:01, Reply)
alt: yes please
nothing tacky though
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:06, Reply)
Was my reply so disturbing that it needed the sub thread deleting?
Sorry about that...
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:20, Reply)
what did you write?

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:21, Reply)
Something about wanking over Pamela Stephenson.
I also just discovered that if you start to google Pamela Stephenson Not The Nine O'Clock News the second auto suggestion is "Pamela Stephenson Not The Nine O'Clock News Breasts"
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:23, Reply)
was it about the hens and their orgasms?
I still don't know if they do or not
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:23, Reply)
They do. Oh trust me, they do.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:24, Reply)
I wrote a rather crude reply too, am a little upset it was deleted

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:23, Reply)
he's thoughtful like that

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:25, Reply)
Right, I'm going home to watch my football team get humilated in front of a TV audience of...well...tens, probably.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:32, Reply)
Child

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:38, Reply)
haha
i am tempted to post some of the gazzes i am getting about this. poor old shallowcunt.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:40, Reply)
What the fuck is going here?
I am old and a little confused...
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:45, Reply)
i post
psycho deletes it because "he doesn't want me posting in his threads". this apparently means more to him than annoying other people by deleting their conversations.

end of.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:46, Reply)
Psychochomp posts. People reply.
If swipe posts anywhere in that subthread, Psychochomp deletes his post thereby removing all the replies.

Because Swipe's being snide.

I don't give a shit whether those two are fueding or not, but deleting other peoples' posts makes you a cunt. Offtopic is turning into a playground. It's pathetic.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:46, Reply)
I don't even care if they are feuding, let alone what you said.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:48, Reply)
Yes I am reduced to shit spelling gags, sozzers.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:48, Reply)
Angry finger mash keyboard RAR

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:48, Reply)
KRONEY MAAAAADDDDDD

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:49, Reply)
He's done it again.
It really is aggravating.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:51, Reply)
no no
it's clever and charming and witty.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:52, Reply)
sometimes i am being snide, but who the fuck on here isn't?
often i am just replying to other people. but "he doesn't want that" apparently. pfffft.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:48, Reply)
If only there was an ignore option...

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:55, Reply)
he used it perfectly well for ages
god knows why he felt the need to change. i tried it, but he posts so fucking often that i missed out on too many conversations.
(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 17:58, Reply)
Yeah, but that's his excuse.

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 18:01, Reply)
he'll get bored soon enough

(, Mon 13 Feb 2012, 18:05, Reply)

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