I almost shed a tear when the kids were born
Bizarrely, I had the old jelly-lip going at an episode of ER many years ago.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:15, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

It was that moment of realistation that you'd never get your own life back
for about twenty years that did it, isn't it?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:16, Reply)

haha!
yes
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:16, Reply)

No, it's the fact the kid was black.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:16, Reply)

haha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:17, Reply)

hahahaha
This actually happened to a FOF, they moved to Milton Keynes and it was so dull they turned to swinging. She ended up expecting his kid and...wasn't expecting a 'Donnie' to pop out. LOL.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:18, Reply)

shamon!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:19, Reply)

I thought Chompy was white?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:19, Reply)

He blacks up to go raping

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:19, Reply)

I heard he injects his testicles with marmite for the lols.
That way he can deny the kid's his.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:21, Reply)

Love him or hate him

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:22, Reply)

hes like the oppersite of eminem.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:22, Reply)

I think it's traditional on the swinging 'scene' to have a partner to swap.
Just turning up on your tod looking like a horny Kim Jong-il is somewhat frowned upon.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:22, Reply)

HAHAHAHA!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:22, Reply)

I think it's traditional on the swinging 'scene' to have a partner to swap.
Just turning up on your tod looking like a horny Kim Jong-il is somewhat frowned upon.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:22, Reply)

You just have to hope that someone can squeeze you in.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:23, Reply)

My laptop is shit.
Expect more Phil-lolz today.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:25, Reply)

Laptop shit but a good seat?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:25, Reply)

Great seat. I'm at home on the 'good sofa'*
*the one that hasn't been broken by Stunned. Twice.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:32, Reply)

What a fat cunt

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:00, Reply)

can you tell a kids skin colour from the ultrasound?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:20, Reply)

Ultrasound pics make kids look like aliens anyway

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:21, Reply)

no i don't think sound reflects colours

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)

i mean maybe it does, i bet the frequency of the soundwave changes when reflected from different colours
but you'd probably need like a spectron telescope or something to see it
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:29, Reply)

No

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:25, Reply)

I didn't enjoy the birth of my daughter at all.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:17, Reply)

Because you weren't there?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:17, Reply)

It's cos she pushed him out

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:17, Reply)

I was there, and was the first to hold my daughter when she was born.
I'm quite a softy at heart but the experience did nothing for me at all.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:19, Reply)

That is odd
It was an amazing experience for me
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:20, Reply)

Different circumstances though I suppose.
My ex and I hated each other's guts by that point
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:22, Reply)

True

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)

i want to make a joke about how you could see some of her guts, but cant put it into words.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:25, Reply)

I'm guessing your wife isn't a monumental wanker though

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:23, Reply)

She's not bad

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)

I thought it was incredible, although it was a bit weird when just the head was out
the misses looked like a playing card
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:27, Reply)

Your missus is black?
/spade
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:28, Reply)

Tee hee

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:30, Reply)

Ours was a caesarian, so it all happened behind a screen.
They couldn't believe how much painkiller she needed, they reached the maximum safe amount and she could still feel it. Ex drugwhore, you see.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:29, Reply)

Epidural for the win
she stopped moaning after that.

The funniest bit was when they were "tidying up" and the doctor very nonchelantly said, "I'm just going to stick my finger into your anus" with no explanation as to why.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:32, Reply)

He was checking your prostate

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)

I'm not as old as Monty

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:35, Reply)

checking your prostate not a real doctor
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)

Magic Mushrooms I imagine made the experience pretty terrifying

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:18, Reply)

Fuck no.
Them and all the gas I nicked were the best bits by far.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:20, Reply)