Morning bastards and token decent human beings
I'm going to the Harry Potter studio tour thing tomorrow, the highlight of which will likely be trying to negotiate the tube - twice - during an Olympic Games. I'm thinking barbed wire around the forearms, but a case can be made for heavy flatulence.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 9:55, 4 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

London fucking stinks anyway

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 9:56, Reply)

G. A. Y.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 9:57, Reply)

That's on Saturday

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 9:57, Reply)

He's doing a live PA with 'H' from 'Steps'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 9:59, Reply)

PA DP
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:00, Reply)

Hahah

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:01, Reply)

Neither of his real names start with H
So it was obviously just a very subtle hint. Like if you were in a boyband your name would be N. Or S.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:05, Reply)

The gay guy who sits next to me has been to dinner with H from Steps.
His opinion: "Annoying screeching queer"
(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:10, Reply)

I've never been
I've heard it's fabulous. Can you confirm or deny this?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:03, Reply)

Monty and I went a couple of weeks ago.
It's a casino now.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:06, Reply)

EPIC SADFACE
Even I would struggle to lose badly enough in a casino to get bummed as a consequence
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:07, Reply)

Quitter.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:11, Reply)

Poolett: red is safe, black gets you a bumming
You don't want to know what green does
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:08, Reply)

with your histroy of shitting yourself whilst out and about
I suggest you leave your butt plug in stick with the barbed wire
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 9:57, Reply)

It's in Watford, nobody wants to go to Watford, it's not even in London

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 9:57, Reply)

Cf Luton and other such shitholes "london Luton" my arse
"oh it's only half an hour on the train" - get out and stay out
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 9:59, Reply)

YOUR SO RACIST
just because luton is full of muslamics
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:01, Reply)

It's because it's a tedious shithole with nothing to see or do there
You need monty if you want to bash the muzzers (my friend calls muslims this. It sounds like it should be racist, but I can't quite work out why. ESP as her mum is Muslim).
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:03, Reply)

I'm indifferent to Londoners, locals, daytrippers, whatevs
surprisingly they all annoy me
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:02, Reply)

I don't mind if they admit their ignorance and stay out of the way
It's the pricks who insist they know it really well and know where they are going and then refuse to admit they re lost but stand in the middle of the street talking loudly about how it's just over there. Those are the kind of twunts that really grind my minge.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:04, Reply)

I like the ones who go to London especially just to jump in front of a tube, or off Archway bridge
top trollin
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:08, Reply)

You're not even a Londoner.
Cheek.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:09, Reply)

I am when it suits me
Or when it comes to paying fucking council tax
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:11, Reply)

It's full of Elton John, that's what I heard.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:01, Reply)

The Harlequin Shopping Centre just keeps em coming back for more

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:03, Reply)

Yeah I know
but you can't get anywhere in the South of England direct from Norwich by train, you have to go via London. This includes BIRMINGHAM. Luckily no-one ever wants to go there.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:02, Reply)

The other cheaper option is to go to cambridge and get the x5 coach to Milton keynes then the train again

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:05, Reply)

Where was this thinking when we were booking tickets weeks ago?
You need to anticipate all my potential future journeys Chompy, what kind of Jedi are you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:06, Reply)

Keep it in mind if you need to get to the south east

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:07, Reply)

I will, cheers
When are you next down my way?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:09, Reply)

WHY HASN'T OUR RELATIONSHIP THAWED IN THIS WAY ???!!

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:10, Reply)

Oohhh second date eh?
What base will you get to?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:11, Reply)

How did you know we'll be playing capture the flag?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:14, Reply)

Gayest euphemism ever
L
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:21, Reply)

Not for a while Baroness is coming here on Tues for a week.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:11, Reply)

You can show her the railway station, scene of one of Supermans greatest speeches

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:13, Reply)

That was our first date.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:15, Reply)

Chicks dig superhero films

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:20, Reply)

especially if you point out all the ways the film isn't true to the original comic

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:20, Reply)

She's a massive geek.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:21, Reply)

pretty low calling your girlfriend fat in public

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:22, Reply)

Keeps her on her toes

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:25, Reply)

That's no excuse*







*It is really
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:15, Reply)

Or indeed to norwich

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:05, Reply)

Norwich is lovely and, more importantly,
it's not full of fucking Brummies
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:06, Reply)

And if you get divorced you're still brother and sister, right?
I went to some little village near Norwich just once. I was sharing a room with my friend. The evil middle aged inbreds running the guesthouse assumed we were lezzers and were really quite rude to us. We LoL'd. Then on the Sunday I went home and my mate's black bf arrived to spend the next 2 days with her. Turned out if there was one thing they liked less than lesbians, it was African men. Really horrible cunts they were.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:10, Reply)

Norfolk does have chronic blacklack
In fairnes, they assumed you were a lesbian because you look like a lesbian
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:11, Reply)

Only in your dreams
Put that puckered quivering arsehole away, nobody's going to kiss it for you
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:13, Reply)

I'm sure I don't know what you mean
I assume it's some kind of lezzer code
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:17, Reply)

Something like that
But less lezzers and more your shameful bumhumming ways
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:19, Reply)

You've got African men written all over your face.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:12, Reply)

In spunk?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:14, Reply)

You are so hot.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:16, Reply)

I try

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:19, Reply)

Hahaha.
Northern bird slagging off Notts Norwich bloke.

*ironylols*
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:08, Reply)

Cheshire darling
If they'd let you in, I'd have shown you round
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:12, Reply)

In the immortal words of Groucho Marx
I wouldn’t want to belong to any club that would have me as a member.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:14, Reply)

What about club biscuits?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:14, Reply)

What about club foot?
TURN THAT FUCKING MUSIC DOWN!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:15, Reply)

Late night last night, was it darling??

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:18, Reply)

he does seem a little manic

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:19, Reply)

Like a big coke powered firework

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:20, Reply)

I love fireworks.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:22, Reply)

I remember winning a quiz
drinking lots of wine and finger banging a colleague.

After that it's all a blur.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:20, Reply)

Finger banging a....
.... But you work in the insurance industry. All your colleagues are men!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:21, Reply)

And your point is?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:21, Reply)

Meh
Good work shitfinger

(Shirley bassey's less successful etc)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:22, Reply)

Was she the fat office bike from finance?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:23, Reply)

All the women in my office are fat bikes.
Except for two, who are just bikes.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:25, Reply)

dunno dude, AA's congleton, thye're not that discerning

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:14, Reply)

My sister in law is from near there
How she laughs when my brother calls it mongleton
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 10:15, Reply)