Last night, dinner with the inlaws
I offered to split the bill and they suggested we pay for the wine and they would pay for the rest, which is a nice gesture, but for some reason it annoys me, if you want to buy someone dinner, buy them dinner, to get them to put an arbitrary amount in seems odd.

They then started questioning the bill which was a bit embarrassing.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:00, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

sit down for this
but.... i TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:01, Reply)

So when we go out for our hot date I expect you to pick up the tab
but I might buy you a coffee on the way home if you're nice.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:03, Reply)

are you going to the sep bash?
i might actually buy you a pint. because i hear you're a cheap date.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:04, Reply)

No, I'm running a half marathon in Bristol the next day
so I shall be staying with CHCB and Clenders and Captain V and Crackhouseceilidhbaby.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:05, Reply)

oh well
i'll buy it and monty can drink it
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:07, Reply)

Please don't encourage him by buying him drinks.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:10, Reply)

I APPROVE OF THIS PLAN

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:10, Reply)

let's do it, let's really do it

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:12, Reply)

Over the bar, like an essex girl

(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:15, Reply)

Where's my fucking pint?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:16, Reply)

patience my pet

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:16, Reply)

I won't even fucking bother asking
I'll get filthy pink shit again if I get anything.
( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:20, Reply)

hahaha i had forgotten about bristol
didn't we even make you go and get a round of it?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:22, Reply)

Yeah, you pulled round rank on me.

( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:23, Reply)

i blame berk

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:24, Reply)

Why? It was your fucking idea in the first place

( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:28, Reply)

why does that mean i can't blame someone else?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:29, Reply)

Caution: Lawyer at Work

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:38, Reply)

It's because you're not lovely to her.
Like what I am.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:22, Reply)

HAHA!
You must be gutted, she professes to like you and yet she won't get you a drink, but me, whom she actively despises, she'll fill up with beer until the cows come home.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:22, Reply)

She goes out of her way to give me the worst hangovers in the universe.
It's more of a love/hate thing, really. I should probably marry her.
( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:23, Reply)

hang on
when did i EVER profess to like him?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:24, Reply)

Last night when I was disappointing you again

( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:34, Reply)

ssssh
don't spill the details of our sordid association like semen on a duvet
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:36, Reply)

Or...
it's a way of allowing you to contribute something while still mostly paying, thus not indirectly suggesting you're a povvo.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:03, Reply)

But I offered to split it
so they know I'm not a povvo.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:05, Reply)

maybe, but i think after a certain age when everyone has a job etc
it's a bit odd. either take it in turns or split the bill equally, don't split it randomly. it would be different if there were loads of people there, so the alcohol bill was much higher than the food.

i always find it a bit odd at our age when someone wants to get the calculator out at a meal. unless they've not been drinking or the other person had something much more expensive, just split it, man! my friend's husband mike actually once refused to put in £20 on the basis that theirs had only come to £18... he has been known as "pike" ever since...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:07, Reply)

I hate people like that.
Hate them.
( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:08, Reply)

Even if people aren't drinking alcohol, most soft drinks will be as expensive as an alcoholic drink
so unless they only had water, they will still be racking up a fair amount.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:09, Reply)

I meant this Mike guy

( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:12, Reply)

Oh I hate him too.
But mainly because he's friends with swipe and is therefore obviously a cunt.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:14, Reply)

he ain't no friend of mine
he married my friend. now i hardly see her!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:16, Reply)

his other classic was when they went to france with another couple who are friends of mine
the other lad didn't speak any french, so pike ended up taking a 50 euro note off him to pay the bill - it was only about 10 euros, as they'd just had hotdogs. guess whose pocket the 40 euros change went into?? my friend's bloke didn't say anything at first, because he didn't want to embarrass him, and assumed it was a mistake. but no.

next stop was for beers. pike paid out of the 40 euros..... THEN gave it back. he's unbelievable.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:15, Reply)

quite often i'll have had the veggie option and been driving
so mine is a bit cheaper, but i would always just say split it. it's going to be about £2 difference, between friends, and doubtless if you added up every single meal and drink you'd ever had together, it would come out at 50/50. it's so annoying.

"well, my lasagne was £15.50 and your stew was £14.85, but then you had a side dish of carrots at £1.75"... urrrgh
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:11, Reply)

The only time it's really worth it is if someone just had a main
while everyone else had starters and desserts too.

That said, I once went for a birthday meal and the food was shit, the service was shit, I hardly drank anything and some other people must have been getting shots and loads of beers and I ended up paying about £50 for a really awful meal. But I still paid, I just complained to the mrs about it on the way home.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:13, Reply)

me too
my posh friend's cunt rah mates kept ordering champagne and i was driving. but for a birthday meal, you don't want to be That person, you just cough up and fume in silence.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:16, Reply)

I think in that situation you're justified in saying fuck off.

( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:18, Reply)

Seems a bit odd.
They should die dog or shite the licence really.
Alt alt, vegi-meatballs, which seems a contradiction in terms. Surely vegi- balls?
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:09, Reply)

What?
Seriously, what the fuck did what you just write actually mean?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:10, Reply)

Sorry, just seen your comment.
"Die dog or shite the licence", is an Irish term for choose one option, or another. To not sit on the fence.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:32, Reply)

Oh Bear Pookie, we all like a lunchtime pint
But really it is too early to be this drunk.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:12, Reply)

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:12, Reply)

Haha, I wish I had the origional of this so I can make it spit out some code and make poeple at work lol.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:30, Reply)

seriously, bees into what, now?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:13, Reply)

What the?
I don't even...
( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:15, Reply)

The sad thing is you've only just woken up and your polyester bedwetting sheet is still stuck to you
bad internet
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:22, Reply)

this also made me LOL
you guys are on fire today
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:22, Reply)

bear pookie the befuddled middle aged man with unrestricted access to the internet is a sad sight
he's like that bloke down the park with piss all down his trousers and a dazed expression
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:27, Reply)

Hahaha

( Kroney, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 12:25, Reply)

maybe they were hoping to draw your attention to the alcoholism that is tearing your family apart

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 7 Sep 2012, 13:10, Reply)