Now that I have my FIRST EVER Oyster card
the world is my, er, oyster. Well, London, anyway.

Where should I go? What should I do?
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:39, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Why are you in my town?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)

Guildford.
Edit: Sorry, I thought you said "where".

Real answer: I'm not.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

You said you'd moved to Muswell hill?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Planning to.
But snags are being run into on an almost daily basis. For once, they're not of my doing.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Fucking Aussies coming over here, leaving piles of sausgaes everywhere
So does this mean you have a new job? Or are you commuting out to Slough?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)

You're a 'sausgae'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)

HAhahahaa

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)

I think that should be pronounced "Saus-Gay"

(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)

I ALSO THINK THIS AS IT IS PRECISELY THE JOKE WHICH I WAS MAKING

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

WHICH IS PRECISELY WHY I WAS LAUGHING
GOD AL IS THICK
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)

I feel a WTN coming on.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)

I work in Uxbridge.
I shall be moving and then I shall take care of the job.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)

yeah good luck with that
my colleague commuted to the bridge from belsize park, it nearly killed her.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)

*crosses fingers*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)

hahaha
poor froggie
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)

She's really keen on this place in Wanstead.
Fucking Wanstead. That's an hour and a quarter away by tube. It's practically in Essex!
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)

Oh man wifey has really got you under the thumb eh?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)

She's a friend, I dont sleep with ALL the women I know.
I'm goign to be moving jobs, so I don't really mind how long hte commute to Uxbridge is as I shan't be doing it for much longer. But still, fucking Wanstead.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)

Wanstead is nice.
Met line at Liv Pool Street. 25 mins into West End. 15 into the City.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

That's not so bad.
I'm learning that the problem is Uxbridge being in the middle of fucking nowhere, rather than north London being inaccessible.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:59, Reply)

being in the middle of fucking nowhere, rather than north London being inaccessible

see also liverpool, wolverhampton, runcorn, widnes, hull, coventry, milton keynes, stockport...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

I reckon a commute to Coventry would be far easier.
My missus used to work on Piccadilly and could get there quicker then colleagues who lived in London.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)

I thought you had slept with her?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

OK, yes, but that was ages ago.

( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:59, Reply)

yes but not now
hence the use of the present tense rather than the past tense

i suspect this will be the argument
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:59, Reply)

Kindly shut up.
You're making me look bad.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

hey
i keep my dick in my pants
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)

I thought it was just a big hairy clit?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)

you and your silverback fantasies

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)

Wanstead is very nice indeed and you could zip across town on the Central Line.
Be reasonable prices too. Dinnae write that off. Se'sly.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)

I've said I'll keep an open mind.

( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

if she keeps an open pair of legs?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:59, Reply)

That's well past us both.
The upside to it is that I don't have to worry about whether my wanger's out when I'm walking around the flat.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)

worry about it? how can you not KNOW?
unless it's too small to tell, of course
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)

I meant it in the "I won't care/be embarrassed" sense.

( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Swinger, eh?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:59, Reply)

Yeah, Rache. An hour commuting nearly KILLED someone.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:53, Reply)

what part of she was commuting FROM belsize park
TO uxbridge did you not understand?

that would make anyone's soul shrivel up and die.

much like your cock.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Is Belsize Park not a nice area?
Please note: this is addressed to Stunned, as you have ideas well outside of your Mancunian station.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Yes it is, but really fucking expensive.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)

I won't live there
if only because Fish from Marillion has had sex there.

Gross.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)

i am not from manchester
i have never lived in manchester. on no level could being born in yorkshire, raised in buckinghamshire, and then moving to cheshire, and then living in london since 18 be considered "mancunian". god it's like you don't know me AT ALL.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)

I love that Northerners get post code envy.
Such an irony.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Yeah alright 'Liam Gallagherr' calm down

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:06, Reply)

The met line out to Uxbridge takes on average 7 1/2 hours, just so you know

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)

and it bounces
my arse clean left the seat on many occasions
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Big seat.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

double seat double seat

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:06, Reply)

I heard they have to strap her to the top of the train.

( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Go to any tube station and then simply jump in front of an oncoming train. HTH.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Add a couple of kisses and that could be a dozer post.

( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)

Eurgh.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)

It wouldn’t work anyway
The French gene would take over so that he could outrun the train.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)

There's a superb exhibition on at the Musuem of London about grave-robbing.
I went last Sunday, you should go too. It's jolly good.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)

You'll be in a grave in a minute.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)

Stop making an 'exhibition' of yourself.
DO YOU GET THIS JOKE?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)

LoL.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

He's certainly gets himself in to some grave situations!!!!1111!!!!

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

It's funny cos it's true!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)

I love musuems.

( Kroney, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)

There are good ones near TRAFALGAR Square.
Which is quite close to WATERLOO Station.

Where else did we spank the French?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)

The bot-bot?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

WE CAN BE MUSEUM BUDDIES WHEN YOU MOVE TO TOWN THIS IS SO EXCITING

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)

uems lims.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)

morning?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)

No justzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:53, Reply)

Monty, I dreamt last night that I bought a 5-bag of weed.
I don't know if a 5-bag is a real thing, but in my dream it was £5 bag with 5 bags inside it containing 1 joint worth of weed. It looked like chinese seaweed though. I bought it gray-area-legally off a supermarket stall. I smoked it and got high. I then woke myself up laughing and confused.

You must have had dreams where you get wasted, I reckon there is something there where you can get yourself hypnotized to get wasted without doing drugs.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:53, Reply)

A five bag of weed these day would get you about two joints tops. It's fucking ridiculous.
I have had dreams in which I have taken loads of coke and can't sleep, and then woken up after a full night's kip feeling utterly exhausted, that's well weird.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:55, Reply)

Exhausted because it was so REAL!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:57, Reply)

THAT'S RIGHT THAT'S EXACTLY RIGHT

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

It's an absolute joke, isn't it?
The days of a cheap oz seem long behind us.
It's all overpriced 1g bags round here now.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)

You can make more money selling an oz of weed in bits than you would a quarter of cocaine.
It's PC gone mad I tell you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)

Have you tried knitting your own out of yurt off cuts and homemade guacamole?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

He fucking sold me some of that the cunt.
Did fuck all.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

new thread new thread
i made a new thread
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)