Hey guys,
I realised that I shouldn't let work get to me, I am wasting energy being annoyed by idiots. What winds you up at work? Any good stories about idiot customers? Did I tell you the one about the guy that shit himself? That was well lol.

Alt: What gets you upset outside of work, when I ride motorbikes I was much calmer than now, I get angry driving my car sometimes,

Altalt: what do you enjoy most about work and life?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:04, 142 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I just do this job for the money.
Not that it's bad or anything, i just don't care about it.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:06, Reply)

it's this kind of attitude that lead to the abuse seen in mid staffordshire

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:07, Reply)

Yes.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:10, Reply)

The Dukaz enquiry

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:14, Reply)

Afternoon Windy poo
Rep. speak irritates the fuck out of me
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:07, Reply)

examples please

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:08, Reply)

Shit like this
www.theofficelife.com/business-jargon-dictionary-B.html
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:16, Reply)

Clients do my fakkin nut in

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:08, Reply)

Just had a bug raised that this rule we've created is bilateral when they wanted unilateral
The idiot had only gone and confused a RULE with an AGREEMENT. CRAZY!!!

I would have hoped it would be clear that a rule is something that applies to both parties whereas an agreement just applies to one.*


*this is sarcasm, our system is set up this way and it makes me cry
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:09, Reply)

CITSB

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:10, Reply)

China International Travel Service Beijing?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:16, Reply)

Cool IT Story Bro

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:17, Reply)

i.qkme.me/5cwl.jpg
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)

Cool information technology story, bro.
Better?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:27, Reply)

It was more directed at the idiots who set up our system in the first place

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)

finding tea cup left all arpound does my nut in
altalt: baby Badmons is by far and away my favorite thing about life
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:09, Reply)

Idiotic customers, suppliers fucking up, making mistakes, my boss, not being allowed to eat at my desk, etc
Alt: Racists and associated idiots. I was particularly angry at the reports of the anti-abortion protestors last week, telling the women they were 'murderers' if they'd had an abortion, etc.

AltAlt: A lot of things, but I appreciate the joy of a good pint after a long day.

I hear Badmons loves ale.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:10, Reply)

ale semen
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:10, Reply)

+ Patel

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:17, Reply)

An uncle of mine is being a busybody prick about a Will he's not even named in.
That's doing my lid a bit at the moment.
( Kroney, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:10, Reply)

Is he the one that used to work you like a ventriloquists dummy?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:11, Reply)

Nah, this is the other one.

( Kroney, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:30, Reply)

I can't offer sound legal advice, but I will punch him in the throat for you.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:12, Reply)

Altalt: my daughter.
I also miss riding motorbikes.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:12, Reply)

otorbikes y wife
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:13, Reply)

a mechanic with battereds bike
www.reachouthyderabad.com/newsmaker/sudhkhar2.jpg
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:13, Reply)

My last bike was one of these:

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:17, Reply)

Same size, too.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:21, Reply)

He would get a grown up
to rev it up on his Evil Kinevel turntable before going out
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)

what is that?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:23, Reply)

A motorbike

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)

A mid life crisis :(

( Kroney, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)

600rr

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)

why did they make it so ugly?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)

Because fuck you that's why.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)

Dunno, but it handled extremely well.
I really want a GSXR 750.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:35, Reply)

gah.
I don't think we should talk about motorbikes anymore.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

Why? What's your taste?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:38, Reply)

A penis extension.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)

A desperate clinging to long lost youth.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:32, Reply)

Yes.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)

That's it, get Bartleby going as well.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

My last bike was one of these :( I miss it but I was very scared of dropping it, its quite rare

( Peej, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:27, Reply)

looks like C5 on stilts

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:28, Reply)

And yes that is a flip up headlight.
It looks white but it was pearlescent paint and glowed different colours as you rode it.
( Peej, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:28, Reply)

Note lack of rear indicators
they were built in to the tail to make it more streamlined. meant they were so close together that you could only tell which way you were indicating from up close.
( Peej, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)

I thought the one battered had was ugly, that, is ugly.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)

That sir, is a classic drag racer
and your opinion is worthless
( Peej, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)

What engine does it have?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)

internal combustion most likely

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:36, Reply)

Shut up Nakers.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

4 stroke I reckon

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:40, Reply)

unleaded

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)

Shut up Nakers.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)

(◉‿◉)
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:51, Reply)

750cc
Excellent over the 1/4 mile. I loved that bike :(
( Peej, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)

its the gsx750 engine

( Peej, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)

it's still horrid looking.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)

Anyone who uses the word horrid
is either a 11 year old girl or wrong or both
( Peej, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)

jesus pj,
It's only a bike.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)

Superb.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:35, Reply)

yes

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:35, Reply)

hahahahahahahahahahahahah

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:36, Reply)

?
www.bbc.co.uk/cambridgeshire/content/images/2005/08/25/monkey_bikes_4_340x270.jpg
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:14, Reply)

www.small-bikes-for-visual-gags.org
(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:15, Reply)

i clicked that :O(

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:16, Reply)

This one wins.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:16, Reply)

Work doesn't wind me up, I occasionally get mildy irritated when someone needs me to do something when I'm trying to waste time, but then I remember I am paid to do this.
Alt: I only ever get angry about really pointless, stupid little things. A quiet reflective joint helps.

Altalt: Specifically relating to the two - the fact that I can keep them separate.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:13, Reply)

'Ning The AWESOME Win Pug
I'm past getting wound up at work now.
I don't tend to get upset much outside of work other than in a standard OLD way, like shouting at the telly and being racist and hating kids and other pensioners and everybody else and that.
From work I mostly enjoy money, and from life I mostly enjoy BOOZE. And being OLD.
:D
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:17, Reply)

Yo Stuji

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:20, Reply)

Oh HAI!
:D
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)

Got any veras?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)

I work in customer support where all the customers think they're anonymous
This leads to much people telling me I'm a cunt and calling me names and so on. Doesn't matter really, they're not important.

I just have to deal with idiot manager speak and dull office shite really. They were all slapping themselves on the backs this week because they came up with an 'infograph' - which featured such wonderful things as a tick next to the number 93%. 93% what? Who knows

See I'm even boring myself now. Offices am dull. I work in office cos they give me too much money. I should get better job, but current job is good for lazy man who get paid money. Hello.
( Theoban What of it, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:19, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1865681
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:22, Reply)

Yeah
Ours have read some books recently I think, they've all started telling us they're 'quantifying' our data and that we should all 'tank' some projects.
( Theoban What of it, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:23, Reply)

I just tell em to
SPEAK PLAIN FUCKING ENGLISH
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)

Racist.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)

Yeah, me boss is Spanish and his boss is French and his boss is Danish and his boss is American

( Theoban What of it, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)

It's all a bit much for a simple Irish lad, eh?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:27, Reply)

Probably, I'll go ask him

( Theoban What of it, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)

how old are you hartley, where do you live and what do you do>?
I feel i know nothing about you
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)

I know
i'll let you have them one thread at a time I don't want to seem like a slut afterall

Age 42

Happy now
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:32, Reply)

Another "silver surfer" eh?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)

I COULD BE FAT AND BALD AND TAKE OFFENCE AT THIS STATEMENT

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)

Are you one of Al's sock puppets?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:35, Reply)

I am no ones sock
Darth won't have me :(
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:36, Reply)

He'd get so deep inside you, that when you died you'd wiping jizz off your soul

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:38, Reply)

Haha
Brilliant

(◉‿◉)
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)

bad language
i.qkme.me/5cwl.jpg
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:28, Reply)

offices do sound horrid.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:24, Reply)

I never want to work in one again
But I'm old and shit and I dunno what else I could do, maybe the Buddhists are right, start over with a new life, this one's wrecked.

MISERY FRIDAY
( Theoban What of it, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)

Mine is full of nice people so is alright
I guess it depends on the industry as much as anything
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)

We all know that Badmons Dukas
Single handly puts down coo's in unstable parts of the world that the SAS are to scared to go, for a living
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:28, Reply)

do you mean a coup?
or a scottish cow?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)

yes both
and noisey Doves
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)

they give me a pounding headache

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:35, Reply)

Thats no headache
It was you headbutting a RGP out of the way
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

Rocket propelled grenade>?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:38, Reply)

Really grumpy Penguin?
Yes I ment RPG :(
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:39, Reply)

My office
is full of me and radio 4. Worse ways to earn a living
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:32, Reply)

Could the problem be
That you are a cunt...

HTH
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:30, Reply)

They don't know who I am, they're just upset with the company and their lives
I don't feel any ill will towards them.
Or you, my foul mouthed little doggy friend.
( Theoban What of it, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)

I was merely suggesting a potential line of enquiry
I wouldnt dream of suggesting that you are, Mr The Oban, are anything other than a true gent...
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)

I do worry that it's my approach that causes some upset
But then I stop worrying and dick around on the internet for a while
( Theoban What of it, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)

Hello there!

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)

32 minutes until the end of the day
that's what a great employee I am today
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:28, Reply)

Fuck that shit.
I'm placiding right now.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)

you always scoot early
fucking council working jobsworth
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)

I've been on the CP most of the day

( Kroney, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)

Hi captain!

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:30, Reply)

I know, I know, but it's been a shit week and I've run out of energy to do or care about anything anymore

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)

I'm in the juicer.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:36, Reply)

The gay bar in Vauxhall?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

Not going south of the river.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:39, Reply)

Stephen will be disappointed

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)

^ this

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

I NO RITE

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

I speak to a lot of people that don't speak a tremendous amount of english
Sometimes that can cause problems. Hope this helps x
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)

I never Knew you lived in Bradford

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:46, Reply)

Al will call you racist for this comment

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)

or battered will and then he will delete it

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)

Yes.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)

Are you implying Battered is a terrible thread deleting prick?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)

Unequivocally

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:51, Reply)

I'm gonna call you racist for implying hartley is a racist.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)

I'm going to call you a racist for talking to a Nigerian Prince in those tones

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:50, Reply)

AH AM TRENNING TO BE A NOSS

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:55, Reply)

My son has an african friend who speaks just like that

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:57, Reply)

African? Is that a country now?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:58, Reply)

How can i be racist? My son has a black friend!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:59, Reply)

Is he allowed in the house?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:59, Reply)

He has to go straight in the bath
because he's so dirty.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 16:02, Reply)

If by bath you mean river
then yes
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 16:04, Reply)

I'm all cool with him and greet him with
"WHATS UP MY NIGGA"
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 16:02, Reply)

There was a midwife at the hospital who talked just like that
I know most of the time it's not right that people working in Hospitals get attacked, but sometimes the fucking useless cunts totally deserve it.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:59, Reply)

You allowed a negro to touch your child?
*phones social services*
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 16:02, Reply)

The midwife who delivered her was a lovely big west indian woman.
In fact all the midwifes were lovely, with the exception of this one really aggressive and rude fucker with a very thick accent.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 16:13, Reply)

(◉‿◉) ?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:54, Reply)

Wanking.
To all of them.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:55, Reply)

keep life simple eh?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 15:56, Reply)

Funny you should mention that
I've just got back from lunch, and need to call an idiotic customer.

Possibly the truest line from any film ever; "This job would be great if it weren't for the fucking customers"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 15 Feb 2013, 16:02, Reply)