Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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My post lunch shit at work was just interrupted by the fire alarm going off.When were you last interrupted during something pleasurable?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:45,
139 replies,
latest was 12 years ago)
When Gonz interrupted your wife wanking me off while teabagging me.(, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:46, Reply)
His wife teabagged you?Either his wife has testicles, which the existence of micro would seem to discredit, or you don't know what teabagging is.
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Kroney, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:49,
Reply)
She had my balls in her mouth.There was teabagging involved, let's not split hairs.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:50, Reply)
Splitting hairs is disagreeing over minor pointsnot the entire definition of the term. It seems you don't know what splitting hairs means, either.
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Kroney, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:52,
Reply)
alright MontsWevvers mix with some rockabilly in:
www.mixcloud.com/clashmusic/andrew-weatherall-dj-mix/
Couldn't find any pure rockabilly ones, but he's a bit of a musical magpie anyroad.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:55, Reply)
Nono, Battered's wife was doing the teabaggingdo keep up, Monty, there's a lamb
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Kroney, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:55,
Reply)
I'm so confused!I was going to toddle off and make myself a cup of tea but somehow I've gone off the idea.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:58,
Reply)
I know what splitting hairs means and yeah, I meant to say while I was teabagging her.This is just an internet messageboard, not an academic forum.
Extra lols from the man who used the term 'stirling effort' the other day.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:53, Reply)
wow yeah, unpopular with a minority of the posters on an internet forum.Breaks my heart that does.
Stirling insults, here.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:56, Reply)
Lack of self-awareness too, if you think it's a minority.But you are right, I made a spelling mistake. I tend to do that when I'm typing quickly. Most of the time I correct them, sometimes I miss a couple.
That is indeed entirely equal to a fundamental misunderstanding of the meaning behind two commonly used phrases that you've defended by saying "just a message board, innit".
Well done on bringing me down to your level. Congratulations are in order.
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Kroney, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:59,
Reply)
This is just a messageboard though, innit?Clearly teabagging involves the mouth and the scrotum, I'm just pissing about on here while doing something else (as most of us are) and got the teabagger/ teabagee thing the wrong way round, which is clearly the sign of a cretin. I found the er/ee thing to be a minor point, because I'm not really fussed what a pompous IT drone thinks of me, so yeah, splitting hairs was the right phrase to use. What's next?
I dunno, crucify me, I enjoy cocking about online.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:04, Reply)
rabbitrabbitrabbitrabbitrabbitrabbitrabbitrabbitrabbit(
Reginald Donkeyfuck, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:05,
Reply)
No, teabagging is just lowering your bollocks onto someone/something, usually in the face though.(
BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:19,
Reply)
No, a cursory google search shows that it may also involve licking and sucking the bollockbag.(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:24, Reply)
Nail and headHave a click
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:57,
Reply)
I have two kids and no lock on the bathroom doorI can't remember the last time I had an uninterrupted shit.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:49,
Reply)
One day you're putting locks on internal doors in the house, the next you're living in a flat on your own.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:58,
Reply)
this sounds a bit saville(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:53,
Reply)
Pretty sure my kids have never interrupted him on the loo.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:57,
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That's not what your son Youssou told me.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:59,
Reply)
We allow him to roam free about the commune now he is seven.Maybe he has wandered into the wrong yurt occasionally, but it is all life experience for him.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:02,
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You think that the act of love is natural and nothing to be ashamed ofso you make him watch whilst you slap one up his mum, meanwhile your other kid keeps time on a bodhran.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:05,
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Is that not what everybody does?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:07,
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Yossou N'O'locko N'door?From the Irish O'locko N'doors?
Big fan of his, me.
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Kroney, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:02,
Reply)
In spite of my reputation, I'm not sure I've ever heard any of his songs.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:07,
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Absolutely, good old Don.Her daughter is one of the worst people to ever have blighted the planet.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:10,
Reply)
After his son, that is.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:11,
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Who, 'Japs-eye' or whatever his name is?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:13,
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I think this is worthy of a click.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:04,
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I was having a wank downstairs and forgot my mother in law was down and she walked in(
Peej, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:49,
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Can I follow up the lie I just told with another one?If so, yes she got down on her knees and said, I'm the older more experienced version and noshed me off an gave me a finger in the bum.
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Peej, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:52,
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Thing is, this is fairly believable round your way.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:03,
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did you emergency abort and suck it all back in for another time?(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:53,
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Nah, cargo doors were well and truly open. Couldn't smell smoke so took the time to have a satisfactory wipe as well.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:55,
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Good to know. Thanks for posting this.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 May 2013, 12:59,
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Says the bloke that was threatening to text me pictures of their diarrhea not that long ago...(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:03,
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Not according to Google I didn't.www.google.co.uk/search?q=diarrhea&aq=f&oq=diarrhea&aqs=chrome.0.57&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:08,
Reply)
But not man enough to leave the argument in its original context. If you want to have a pop at me, the thing to do would be to do it to my face and leave other people out of it.
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Kroney, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:22,
Reply)
You've made it to the popular page.Just sayin'
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:23,
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Often considered far worse than merely mispelling a word.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:10,
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Indeed.But as Monty is so keen on mentioning at times like this, American English is often closer to older forms of English, for instance 'pants' is from 'pantaloons'.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:14, Reply)
Sounds a bit French to me.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:15,
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Dictionary.reference.com reckons there's an o in it.dictionary.reference.com/browse/diarrhoea?s=t
Whatevs though.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:10, Reply)
There is, on this side of the Atlantic.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:11,
Reply)
None of this detracts from the point that you were threatening to sending me pictures of your runny turds.Deviant.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:13,
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I could still do that at any time I so wish.So no backchat from you or else.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:15,
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I think it's moving towards brinkmanship. Neither wants to see the other's poo.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:18,
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I'd say it's a cold war, but we don't want any more space docking references, do we?(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:19, Reply)
someone on links has died again ! Blimey when will they ever stop dying !(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:36,
Reply)
I see you've been your usual charming self when replying to the news.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:39,
Reply)
they're always a bit touchy when another one of em dies(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:43,
Reply)
I wonder if they'll video the funeral & post it. That would be just in the spirit of /links.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:44,
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Awww, I missed it, it's been modded(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 7 May 2013, 14:35,
Reply)
It would need a an "epic fail" in the middle(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:47,
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I was teabagger you're mom and dun a diarrear in her hare :s(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:37,
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yer...I think I want to learn to make satay sauce, but I can't be bothered to pound up peanuts and using peanut butter feels wrong
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:41,
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oh is it? I'd better not make it or ever eat it again thenthank you for saving me.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:42,
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Mash up a load of satay and dog toffee, then custard pie Battered with it.LOL
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:44, Reply)
fingers crossed he has a peanut allegy eh?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:45,
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b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1954448
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:45,
Reply)
Ha!Coming from Off Topic's second most despised poster, this is gold.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:47, Reply)
Ooh, I must say, you're much better looking than I expected.*panders*
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:43, Reply)
awful photo that, I do not photograph well at all.but it was the best i could find.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:46,
Reply)
I still can't decide which photo from my extensive portfolio to use.I might get a fresh set done.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:51, Reply)
I'm not sure that's wise.One of our IT drones used a picture of himself wearing conical party hats on his ears. I had to have a word with him about the value of visual identity to his brand.
He's changed it.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:55, Reply)
I assume you're talking about Linkedin(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 7 May 2013, 14:00,
Reply)
Why are you gazzing pics of yourself to Dozer?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 13:49,
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It's not the same if it doesn't come from him.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 14:05,
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He's a top bloke a v talented too.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 7 May 2013, 14:15,
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Yeah, I didn't know he'd been in The All Seeing I.Seems to be a pretty solid DJ & producer.
(, Tue 7 May 2013, 14:17, Reply)
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