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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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The friends I met out in Morrocco were puersuaded to buy a leather "poof" for 1300 dh or around £100
We bought something similar for less than £20. Have you ever been massively ripped off or got a great bargin? Can you haggle or do you get all shy and British?

Alt: Turns out my electricity isn't earthed properly add my flat is a death trap, which is fun. Is your house a death trap?

altalt: I have some raw beetroot, what should I do with it?
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:19, 147 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
Fuck off, you massive bent spastic, no-one gives a fuck about how much your rent boys cost.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:20, Reply)
it's funny because you've taken the word "poof" to mean a "homosexual" rather than the stuffed footstool it was supposed to be!!
great stuff, great...stuff.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:22, Reply)
Was almost ripped off years ago when I nearly bought a Panasoanic CD player
Just noticed before the cash changed hands. I've always bargained and bartered. As they say up North "Shy bairns get nowt". The amount of discounts/freebies we've had over the years is amazing

Alt:
Yes - many light fittings in the pelmets over the windows. Not sure if live or not. Cracked plug sockets, the lot.

AltAlt:
You should boil it for 15-20 mins until soft, then roast it with balsamic vinegar and chilli flakes
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:21, Reply)
alt alt
and then throw it in the bin and get some proper food
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:31, Reply)
I was brought up to believe that talking about money is vulgar.
Splitting restaurant bills in any way other than bill plus tip divided by number of people is the height of poor form etc. The idea of haggling turns my stomach.

As a result I haven't a pot to piss in, so 'thanks, parents'.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:22, Reply)
There's that and the whole 'unplanned baby by a nutter' thing that's contributing to your poor finances as well.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:23, Reply)
that reminds me, where is battered, has he killed himself?

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:23, Reply)
he turned 40 yesterday and isn't feeling very well now

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:25, Reply)
Because he's realised that he's now on a downhill slide to the grave and he's utterly failed at his life?

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Yes.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:30, Reply)
Plus the MASSIVE DRUGS, the 3000+ records, the six guitars, the trainers and books collections.....


The blame rests squarely at my parents' door for all of this.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:24, Reply)
how many pairs of sneakers do you have?

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:25, Reply)
Actually fewer than 25 pairs now, I got rid of fucking loads a few years ago

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:27, Reply)
25 pairs?
I take it back, you're not a massive bent spastic, you're Swipe in a Hawkwind tshirt.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:30, Reply)
I used to have about 60 pairs at one point :o(
I'd buy doubles if they were reduced, to save for later. I still have 3 pairs of red on white Puma baskets to this very day.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:32, Reply)
I read this in the style of Dozer :o((((

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:43, Reply)
Colin Prick is filmed in front of a live studio audience.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:47, Reply)
*Plays canned Cufflink Jingles*

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Anyone who owns more than one pair of trainers is a bent spastic.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Hang on....really?

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:29, Reply)
*bent spastic fives*

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:31, Reply)
Today marks a new low in the Life of Boyce.
:o((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:31, Reply)
Cobblers
Got to have a least a pair for messing about in and a semi-smart pair.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:31, Reply)
A good point. More than two is clearly a symptom of angled cerebral palsy related gigantism.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:32, Reply)
i have 4, 1 for running, 2 for casula wearing, 1 for DIY, gardening getting muckty

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:33, Reply)
I've got 2 for hockey
1 for running. 2 for hillwalking/running. 4 for "going out"

Am I WTN?
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:47, Reply)
oh god do you own those off road cross trainers
beloved of tourists who think they are going somewhere a bit rough, like Greece.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:56, Reply)
what a cunt, eh readers?

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:00, Reply)
facts on the internet

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:02, Reply)
two pairs.
But then I'd climbed the 20 highest mountains in the UK before my 15th birthday, and I still climb and fellrun, so, y'know, probably acceptable.

I'm still a cunt, of course.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:06, Reply)
Yes
But you would have been WTN prior to your Trainer disclosure
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:56, Reply)
YES.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:06, Reply)
I've got none.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:48, Reply)

none AIDS
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:55, Reply)
You can get them free with mobile phones

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:56, Reply)

none a large growth on the side of my neck caused by iron deficiency
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:56, Reply)

none chills, they're multiplyin'
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:59, Reply)

none a brand new combine harvester, I'll give you the key
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:00, Reply)

combine voucher for
key free bottle of Lambrini
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:01, Reply)
hahahaha

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:03, Reply)
I was fine with that until the night some fucking bitch ordered 2 bottles of champagne, drank them both
and then the bill was split 18 ways. I had no idea they were going to do this, I was broke so didn't have a starter or dessert and ended up paying about three times what I expected. Fucking rich cunts.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:26, Reply)
My father pulled a similar stunt on my brother a few years ago,
he had the cheapest main course and one glass of wine, the old boy did his usual four courses, different wine per course etc. Bruv was livid.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:29, Reply)
That's why I always order last and order the most expensive.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:45, Reply)
You're *quite* the catch!

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:53, Reply)
it's this kind of thought process that led to the great chompy/swipe split of 2010

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:54, Reply)
I also had this happen on a hen night
ordered a £6 lasagne (during another period of joblessness) and was expected to pay £22. not a fucking chance.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:52, Reply)
The key is to be clear at the beggining if you must
don't get to the time for the bill and bitch and moan about it.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:55, Reply)
This is correct.
Or just stay at home.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:56, Reply)
the bank took it away :(

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:01, Reply)

bank electric board
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:03, Reply)
I'm sure Darth could have sorted you out for free
My house is fine, apart from nothing being straight, parallel or at 90 degrees to anything else.
alt: earth wire too short, I bet?
altalt: throw dat shit in the bin.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:22, Reply)
earth wire doesn't exist
the only earthing is through the water and gas pipes
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Fucking hell
That needs sorting asap - any other faults and what you think is earthed could end up live, plus your RCDs probably won't work properly.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:28, Reply)
what's an RCD?
The British Gas electrician said he wasn't even allowed to work on the system and when I asked how I could mitigate the risk he said"don't use any electricty" :s
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:32, Reply)
Recordable compact disc
I bet yours don't work anymore
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:32, Reply)
Residual Current Device
Circuit breaker to you and me.

Cuts off the supply if any current leakage. Very important safety device, has to be fitted to any new install these days.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:38, Reply)
Spoil sport
My answer was better
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:39, Reply)
Yours was CD-R

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:47, Reply)
Since when have we ever let the facts come between a silly answer?

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:49, Reply)
Dunno, ask Monty 'scourge of QOTW lies' Boyce

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:57, Reply)
I wouldn't do that, he'll cut your head off.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:58, Reply)
The best thing about it is that the police don't even care.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:03, Reply)
He gets upset if I broach the subject

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Meh, electricians like that won't touch anything that isn't up to current regs.
The kitchen fitters at my place wouldn't touch it until it had been rewired. Which, of course, they were strangely happy to do for the bargain sum of £2K.

Doesn't necessarily mean that you'll die. Earthing through pipes is arguably just as safe as an earth wire. Safer in some cases.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:09, Reply)
Thats not the sort
of sensational "we are all doomed" advice that we want here.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:18, Reply)
Altalt: Cook it.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Cook it real good.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:53, Reply)
*spinderellas*

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:54, Reply)
I bought a couple of concrete blocks off a guy in Ealing
Imagine how fucked off I was when I got home and there was actually speakers in the box.

Alt. No, my house is 6 years old and conforms to all modern safety standards.

Altalt. Eat it? I dunno.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:24, Reply)
lol

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:25, Reply)
I had that 'speakers' con tried on me once.
I told them I wasn't interested and the bloke said 'what, don't you like music?'
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:41, Reply)
I had it tried on me in Ealing,
his response was remarkably similar.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:19, Reply)
alt:alt: Put it in a sock and mug the local sandwich delivery man

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:28, Reply)
We haggle for everything
Pretty much. Hth x
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:31, Reply)
is that why you're banned from John Lewis?

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:34, Reply)

John Leona
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:41, Reply)

Leona Jam &
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:43, Reply)
And Sainsbury's.
'£49.82 please'

'£40 for cash?'


BING BONG, CAN SECURITY PLEASE GO TO TILL FOUR, THANK YOU
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:42, Reply)
Well it doesn't work so well in supermarkets, admittedly
But pretty much anywhere else that I might shop.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:51, Reply)
I wish it wasn't such an issue for me. I simply cannot bring myself to do it, it's ingrained in me

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:54, Reply)
I don't enjoy it nearly as much as my missus does
she's like a bloody rottweiler
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:59, Reply)
Don't let Jeff know this

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:04, Reply)
hahaha

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:06, Reply)
My mates an electrician and I ran this by him
He says "For fucks sake turn off the electric and don't use it until its sorted"

HTH
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:36, Reply)
really?
apparently it's been in this state for 10 years or so...
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:37, Reply)
He also said
stop staring at the children in the school playground. And keep your trousers on in public.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:39, Reply)
you've got me mixed up with barters

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:52, Reply)
I will often have a haggle for items
it makes my missus rather embarrassed. It does however mean I have saved a fortune over the years.

Alt My gaff seems to be sound even though its 200 odd years old. HTH
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:38, Reply)
Me too
Recent ones:

£2000 off windows
£150 off kitchen fitting
Paid £0 to get new back door fitted
Refused to pay plumber at all for bathroom fitting
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:49, Reply)
But how much did you pay to have your back doors smashed in
In the first place, eh?
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:53, Reply)
£10k

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:54, Reply)
Unlimited slushies
THANK YOU COME AGAIN
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:55, Reply)
Oh boy did they come again

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:02, Reply)
Text and might I add Book

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:58, Reply)
not sure why you felt the need to stomp my thread you fucking paki lover

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:40, Reply)
Not enough parrot chat, you fucking cunt.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:47, Reply)
upset^

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:50, Reply)
+ ANGRY

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:50, Reply)
+ impotent

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:58, Reply)
So who watched the Game of Thrones season three finaly last night????
It was really good.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 11:59, Reply)
i looked to dowload season 1, but could find a decent torrent

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:00, Reply)
Have you seen the new look PS4*?
*Awaits Monty backlash
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:02, Reply)
All I know so far is it's cheaper than the Xbox.
I'm never an early adopter anyway, I'm a big fan of hovering up all the bargain bin games from the previous generation when the new one comes out.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:04, Reply)
This
www.techradar.com/news/gaming/consoles/ps4-release-date-news-and-features-937822
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:06, Reply)
Isn't it just going to depend on which one has the best games?
As it always does?
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:15, Reply)
I thought episode 10 was a bit of a letdown after the mayhem of 9
Still fucking brilliant though
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:06, Reply)
I thought it was WELL good, I love little starks turn to the dark side.
And the fact Rob Snow got arrowed.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:07, Reply)
There's no character called Rob Snow.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:12, Reply)
He knows nuthin

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:15, Reply)
haha.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:15, Reply)
I'm only really aware of the existence of Game of Thrones through people on the internet constantly posting messages like OMG WHAT ABOUT THAT EPISODE OF GAME OF THRONES!!! DONT TELL ME WHAT HAPPENS!!!

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:07, Reply)
You should watch it. TITS and DRAGONS and then later TORTURE

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:08, Reply)
I've just looked it up and the word 'fantasy' keeps cropping up with alarming regularity.
I don't think it's for me.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:12, Reply)
it's actually quite good.
I really liked the books, and I don't really like fantasy stuff. I'm just watching season 1 and it's pretty cool TV.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:16, Reply)
Hmm I'm not convinced.
I don't really like TV
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:19, Reply)
it's a Larp TV show pretty much.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:21, Reply)
i believe it is about sean bean and his quest for breasts and swords

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:09, Reply)
Sean Bean was deaded near the end of the first book
So I can't imagine he's in that much of the TV thing.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:11, Reply)
You fucking spoilering fuck!

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:12, Reply)
Isn't it on, what, season fucking 3 now?
how is mentioning something that must have been middle of season 1 at best "spoilering" ?
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:14, Reply)
Not everyone has seen every episode.
Especially Tangles who started this subthread and specifically said he hadn't.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:15, Reply)
and indeed that he had no intention of seeing
so, y'know.

Just be fucking thankful I don't list everything of interest that happens after the red wedding until the end of Dances with Dragons (I assume that was the thing that everyone bangs on about on facebook from season 3?)
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:18, Reply)
So it's basically a rewrite of Sharpe?

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:12, Reply)
Bernard Cornwall is a master of prose and plot
he needs no rewriting
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:16, Reply)
Too fucking sharp was his problem

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:16, Reply)
I still struggle with the fact that people are going OMG don't tell me what fucking happened
regarding the plot of one of the middle books of a series, where the middle book has been published for several years.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:13, Reply)
Because they haven't read the book and want to enjoy the TV series?
It's not that much of a struggle you bent spastic
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:16, Reply)
No, I think you miss my point.
I don't struggle with why they don't want to know what happens. Whatever medium you choose to take the story in is absolutely cool. It would be same with anything.

I struggle with fucking idiots banging on about it in public fucking forums as if a) it's a big secret and b) they can't wait to find out and c) the only way to know is to WAIT FOR THE FINAL EPISODE OMFG.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:20, Reply)
The best thing about it is that the police don't even care.

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:25, Reply)
*nods*

(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 13:20, Reply)
yeah but the kind of people that slavishly watch television aren't likely to have read these books or any others
even if they are full of lordling pricks from "Commeth'daal" on a quest to find the mythical Dragon Axe of "Gwar'neth'Pull"
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:24, Reply)
Again, I'm not moaning about people not wanting the story spoilt
that's absolutely fine. I'm objecting to fuckers who act like it's the most amazing revelation and surprise.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:25, Reply)
I'm gonna be honest here badger
I couldn't give a shit either way.

And with that, I'm off and out to get a chicken, hummus, and chilli sauce wrap thing.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:26, Reply)
Lunch.
Officially better than game of thrones.
(, Tue 11 Jun 2013, 12:27, Reply)

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