I've just got a new monitor. It's fucking massive and ridiculously sharp
I think it's wasted on b3ta.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:53, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

YOU'RE wasted on b3ta
so maybe, you know, try somewhere else?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:53, Reply)

you're wasted on life
so maybe, you know, join your mum.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:55, Reply)

or your wife, when the bloated pumpkin head of your second spawn makes her pelvis explode

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:56, Reply)

Yeah, that's not gonna happen.
I should probably have that conversation with her.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Only children grow up to be non selfish, self centred and spoilt brats. So that's good.

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:01, Reply)

I'm an only child

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)

*closes case*
Thanks your honour
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:27, Reply)

:o(

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:55, Reply)

yeah but some kids are proper fucked up by/about their siblings
the problem is, people. people are cunts.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)

The Doors'zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:54, Reply)

"...when you're cuntier"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:55, Reply)

I do wonder about how they teach reproduction in Catholic schools.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)

THey say "RACHEL STOP TOUCHING THAT YOU FILTHY DIRTY GIRL!!!!!!!!!"
and it makes all the school girls grow up to lust after men who don't want to touch their foo-foos.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:01, Reply)

IF YOU GET YOURSELF PREGNANT YOUR PELVIS WILL EXPLODE!!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:02, Reply)

P Uh-huh-huh!
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:03, Reply)

Now this I'd pay to see

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)

I imagine his 'shitting himself to death' departure from this world was very similar.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:09, Reply)

IT WILL IF AL IS THE FATHER
i am not sure what part of this you aren't getting, you're normally not one of the slowest around here. is it because you haven't seen a picture of his MASSIVE PUMPKIN HEAD?

i would ask al to draw one, but there might be a conflict of interest here.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:06, Reply)

I've met Al
I wasn't particularly struck by the size of his head.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Was he far away?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)

He was playing a banjolele

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)

would you want to eke it out of your pelvis?
and don't even think about lying to us
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Would I like to give birth to a full grown adult?
No.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:11, Reply)

i notice you avoided the question about having al's pumpkin buried in your pelvis

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)

As long as he uses plenty of lube and works up slowly, initially just using one finger, I should be ok.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:20, Reply)

blimey
al, i think you're in here
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:21, Reply)

Too busy marvelling at its shiny hairlessness to notice its size

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:09, Reply)

in actual fact, the nuns had glued all the pages on reproduction together in the library
i reckon we knew more than they did, and we were 10.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Yeah, "glued"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:20, Reply)

these women were in their 70's and 80's
i hope you feel ashamed and slightly sick
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:21, Reply)

DEFCON BONGLE

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:21, Reply)

"Shame Bongle"
The best kind of Bongle
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)

"Our Father......"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:44, Reply)

i didn't go to a catholic school
well, only for a year.

this has nothing to do with reproduction and everything to do with al's massive swollen pumpkin head
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)

monitor bald patch
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:57, Reply)

*long protracted discussion about inputs And relative sharpness*

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:57, Reply)

YEAH! NOW YOU FUCKING OWN IT!!!!

(Bazongaloid, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 9:58, Reply)