Happy new working week
Draw up a chair, and give us your craic!


( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:42, 273 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

morning
early b3ta risers unite!

good weekend?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:44, Reply)

Morning all
Vipros...Nooooooooo Twiglet fingers are evil!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:45, Reply)

Morning Vipros
Yes, quite good thanks. Lots of mileage on Saturday, but yesterday was spent primarily doing very little.

And you?

Edit@Wanderlust - Morning! And I'm with you on the Twiglets. Horrible things.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:46, Reply)

They are rank.
Oh dear, it's to early to be thinking of nasty twiglet fingers.
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:53, Reply)

I'd forgotten I'd changed my sig...
my weekend had it's ups and downs. had quite an issue with tiling and my shower on saturday, but that's on its way to being sorted.

played with my band in a pub from about 1 till 4 yesterday lunchtime which was fun. a lot of made up jams that went down pretty well.

and they've asked us to be their house band which means regular sunday lunchtime gigs which we get paid for as well as free beer and food!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:54, Reply)

Vipros
that sounds like lots of fun and free beer and food is always a winning situation.
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 8:59, Reply)

indeed
it's basically like having another band practice, we just jam and mess about :-)

also, with the money they are paying we will have enough for significant proper studio time in a couple of months
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:05, Reply)

Morning
my cheap little hos.

Hows it going?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:07, Reply)

hey, what's with the little!?
how are you Ethelred?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:08, Reply)

@ethelred
and cheap?!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:09, Reply)

Value
is always set by the buyer :P

I'm feeling perky today. maybe it was THe almost 20 hours of bedtime yesterday.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:10, Reply)

20 hours of bedtime
sounds like something I could really do with

I have this problem where if I go to bed before midnight I can't sleep. and I have trouble after midnight too.

need a holiday!

however, I'm feeling fairly upbeat today as well. joy!

and it's my birthday on saturday
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:13, Reply)

Well
I must admit, it was to recover from my Whiskey fueled bender on Saturday. I lost pretty much 4 hours, which I'm scared about rather than proud.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:14, Reply)

mediation and nose picking
Morning all.

I have the first session of mediation for my divorce today (boo!) and then have the rest of the week off (yay!).

I'm currently sitting in the waiting room, desperate to pick my nose, which I reckon if I time it right I can get away with it. Not sure I'd get away with wiping it anywhere though...

Anyway, wish me luck :)
( SeasonTicketless is too often the statue, and rarely the pigeon., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:16, Reply)

It's a bank holiday here (Ireland)
and one other person and I are working. I brought my laptop. I'm thinking of watching the new Rambo movie again cos it's ace.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:19, Reply)

good luck
even though I thought it said meditation...

would be an interesting way of going about it

"now you two are going to sit and commune with the cosmos until you can agree who gets the big tv"

Note: not that I want to make light of your situation!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:20, Reply)

Good luck season.
I hope you find somewhere to wipe your nose gunk.
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:20, Reply)

I am still lying in bed
thinking about getting up.

Really should do some work today but it's the school holidays....kids to shout at.

@ Seasonticketless - good luck with that one.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:25, Reply)

@chickenlady
I'm am so very jealous. I had to leave my bed at silly o'clock this morning.
I've already been in the office for 2 hours.
*cries*
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:30, Reply)

@ Season
Morning, you could leave it on your finger until it dries, then wipe it on the door as you walk into the office...

@ Chicken

Moanin'
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:32, Reply)

Helllllloooo!
Good morning one and all! How are we all today? I feel like crap. I have such a bad sore throat and headache, really not perfect for my interview tomorrow.
Oh well, I shall go to Asda (other supermarkets are available) and stock up on yummy food.
Did anybody have a super interesting and exciting weekend?
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:36, Reply)

Good morning
Ladies, Gentlemen and 'Red.

I've been up since half four. Bit rubbish.

Debating going back to bed or not.
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:36, Reply)

Morning Lucy
I'm ok thanks, rather spritely.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:37, Reply)

I went to a fetish party this weekend.
Wanky man wasn't there this time, but I did meet a woman with large breasts who could have possibly been a man.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:38, Reply)

@Kaol
That is rubbish! Go back to bed.
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:41, Reply)

@Kaol
Why the early start?


@ bugger it kev

You did go to a fetish party, yet suprised to find transexuals?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:43, Reply)

Yeah...
I was gonna, but now I'm eating weetabix and watching Dexter.

EDIT: 'Red, I went to take my family to the airport, then had to drop my sister to get a train. Fun stuff.
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:45, Reply)

*displays craic*
Good morning! I don't know what it is about Sunday nights that mean I am unable to sleep, but I sit here with a hyooge database in front of me and 2 hours sleep behind me.

Argh!

Here's to another week! *toasts*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:46, Reply)

*toasts*
I'm annoyed.

I haven't been surfing for over a month and am getting withdrawl symptoms.

the one thing I want to do on my birthday on saturday is go surfing and the fucking forecast is saying flat.

to add insult to injury my brother and my mates are going on wednesday night when I can't fucking go.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:48, Reply)

@ kaol
interesting stuff. no holiday for you then?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:49, Reply)

No, I didn't fancy it.
South of France isn't really my cup of tea.
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:50, Reply)

ta all
Mediation is going well so far. I've been banished from the room while the weird lady goes through the ex's finances.

Still need to pick my nose. Mind you, if the mediation woman keeps talking to me like I'm a five year old I may just pick and flick in front of her hehe.

Now, someone please explain why people are either up early or working on a Bank Holiday? You're all mad!

;)
( SeasonTicketless is too often the statue, and rarely the pigeon., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:50, Reply)

Understandable.
Its full of Frenchmen
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:50, Reply)

@ season
its not a bank holiday here!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:51, Reply)

Not that
Just too hot.

I don't like hot weather at all.
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:51, Reply)

@season
One word...Money.
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:52, Reply)

@ lucy
stay away from the bean aisle!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:53, Reply)

@Vipros
Consider yourself lucky old son... Been well over 6 months for me because all of my surf buddies don't go any more. In fact, I've probably even forgot how to stand up!

I have to go snowboarding soon, too. How I miss the mountains!

Bank Holiday? Oh, in Ireland. Damn.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:54, Reply)

Morning all.
I've only just got up and am sat here eating Alpen. Oh the joys of being unemployed.
What do you mean how the hell am I going to pay the mortgage and for my fancy ass car next month? If I don't think about difficult things like that then maybe it won't happen.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:55, Reply)

@rachel
is that a covert innuendo?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:55, Reply)

@rachelswipe
Now you've mentioned it, I might well go and get some refried beans.
In fact, we are having bean burgers for tea tonight! ha. oh the beany goodness.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:59, Reply)

Bank Holiday in Ireland
Day in lieu, extra dough, fuck all to do. I live fifteen minutes walk from work and I never sleep in anyway. Seems the best possible option to *work*, by which I mean, post on here and watch Rambo.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 9:59, Reply)

ethel
no, sadly not. perfect truth. lucy loves teh beanz and i much as i love teh lucy, i think that beans are what is wrong with the world today.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:01, Reply)

mmmmm
Tis true. I do love beans. But I would swap my bean intake for a job. Gah, this is getting depressing!
Does anybody need to hire a trilingual graduate with years of experience in tea making and fannying about.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:05, Reply)

I am now up and showered
and still thinking about work but not actually doing any.

I may retreat to work somewhere in the house and tell the kids I'm busy but actually watch The Last Emperor which I downloaded because Empress Bob said it was a great film the other week.

Or breakfast.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:09, Reply)

Ning...
Just spoke to my dad and it's pissing down in Cornwall, so let's all have a moment of feeling sorry for Dok on his holidays...

Moving on! Hello all! Here's to another week of fun.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:14, Reply)

'Ning Clendrix!
*invokes sun god in Kernow*

Maybe that'll work.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:20, Reply)

Chickenlady
School holidays is it?
I replied to that question of yours, by the way.
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:21, Reply)

*sun dances*
I too invoke the sun god in kernow! (for slightly selfish reasons though, I am going there next week for a few days!)
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:22, Reply)

Lucy
whereabouts?

Jobs - can only offer you part-time maternity leave cover (not for me!) - so location and freedom to roam fab, but pay crap.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:26, Reply)

Clendrix
Near Perranporth, me and mr vp are going to camp for 3 nights whilst visiting a friend of mine down there. It's going to be ace. I'm going to eat pasties until I have to be rolled back to the tent. I flipping love pasties.
As for the job, anything is better than the big fat pile of nothing I have at the moment!
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:29, Reply)

Perranporth FTW
One of my favourite beaches ever.
Here's hoping the weather changes for the better in time!

Edit: Job starts mid to end of October though, so I'm hoping you have something by then!
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:34, Reply)

Bah!
My boss is back today, so I've spent the last hour and a half catching up with work stuff. Fortunately, he's gone for a cuppa, so I can hang round here for a while.

Which will be my last day for some time, as I'm on holiday soon - woo!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:39, Reply)

@ Kaol
I saw your reply, thanks for that, I can stop pondering that one now.

It's amazing the things a human brain comes up with in the small hours when you're trying to sleep. Things I'd never considered before.

Now...breakfast.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:40, Reply)

K2k6
We'll shall be running riot while you're gone, making scientific claims that aren't true, rubbing each other's Jelly Tot nipples and shooting cans of Irn Bru.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:41, Reply)

Woo-bloody-hoo
Good evening fellow B3tans from the hot, humid and humungousness (in a bad way) of Hong Kong. It's stickier here than a large branch of a tree.

How's everyone today? If I suddenly go offline blame the horde (can't think of a better collective noun) of loud, uncontrolled Chinese brats on the plane over here from Heathrow.

I thought that these fcukers had a one-child policy? There's millions of the bastards and they disturbed my enjoyment of Wall-E, Kung Fu Panda and Iron Man (again).

Chuff chart has been created; I'm back on August 29th (25 days away) so I've made a 5 x 5 box and every day that goes past I get to punch out one of the holes.

Ah, the joys, the joys...
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:44, Reply)

With luck, clendrix
we should still have enough scientists here to keep your claims in check (Rakky, for example) and PoD will protect the interests of the Irn Bru.

But as for the nipples, you're on your own!

I may check in occasionally, if I get access to teh web. Just to make sure you're all (mis)behaving!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 10:45, Reply)

How come
it's suddenly all quiet now I'm back?

*sniffs armpits*

Nope, perfectly fragrant.

*checks flies*

Definitely done up.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:04, Reply)

It is quiet, isn't it?
Tell me something interesting...
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:06, Reply)

@k2k6
maybe those things are the problem

b3tards like you smelly and exposed
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:06, Reply)

k2k6
Bring a bit of smut into the conversation. b3tans love smut.
or poo related conversation.
or a bad joke.
ooooh yeah tell us a joke!
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:07, Reply)

Seeing as you asked for it.
Kate and Gerry McCann are to celebrate being cleared of being suspects in the case of Maddy's disappearance, by having a slap up meal at a local restaurant.

If anyone's interested, the twins are upstairs, 3rd door on the left. The key's under the flowerpot.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:10, Reply)

here's one that will appeal to Kaol should he happen to read it ;-)
Thanks to techno, a whole generation thinks that bass is just a knob on a stereo whilst, for those of us who remember real musicians, bass will always be a knob on a guitar.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:12, Reply)

*groan*
thats pretty bad k2k6, but I'm smiling.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:12, Reply)

Joke
I was in a bar on Saturday and saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah.
Blimey! I thought, he's trying to pull a fast one.
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:13, Reply)

in other news
my diary tells me that dom perignan invented champagne today in 1693...... let's all celebrate that he did!!!!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:16, Reply)

Lucy
What have you done?
*wanders off in search of new thread*
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:16, Reply)

@ Vipros
I like your sig.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:27, Reply)

sorry clendrix
I just love a good joke.
I just frightened my other half, he rung me and my throat is so bad I sound like a man and he didn't believe it was me! i'm going to have a joggers and film day I think. And now I learn my interview date has changed AGAIN. I can't keep changing or afford to change my train tickets!
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:29, Reply)

Greetings b3tans - Gr3tans
How's everyone this week?

My get rich scheme involves me getting a new job. Have been applying for jobs and one of the companies has already responded.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:50, Reply)

Hi Spakka
Hakka.

I have just booked some horribly expensive train tickets which now means I'm not getting new shoes. BOO!

IUt's very quiet in here today. You don't supoose people are working, do you?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:51, Reply)

I'm amused
that we're all telling daft and sick jokes, and rachelswipe tells us about Dom Perignon!

She moves in rarefied circles indeed!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:52, Reply)

@Ethelred
Not surprised. It's a bit of game spotting them sometimes in dark places.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:56, Reply)

I have done some work!
It wasn't much, but I might have to have a lie down. In the park. Under a tree.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 11:58, Reply)

@ kev
takes a lot of digging to find some of them
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:01, Reply)

I HAVE DONE SOME WORK!
Go me!


Now Work is going around in my head.

I think that's unhealthy.


Perhaps I ought to have a coffee and a biscuit to get rid of it.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:02, Reply)

I think it went quiet
because we frightened eachother away with out smutty jokes.

Glad to see everyone's getting some work done. I'm also making good progress in finding some work to do.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:05, Reply)

@chickenlady
Just did a short answer to your evolutionary query.

If you should ever come up with something in the small hours worth pondering, you know where to call.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:08, Reply)

@Chickenlady:
Garibaldi? *offers*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:10, Reply)

Woo yey
Luncheon awaits! *noms lasagne*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:17, Reply)

I've been texting my mates
with wanderlust's cheetah joke. That sort of thing tickles my funny bone.

Damn this work. I've been quite busy today, and now I've got meetings at 1.30 and 2pm. Still, I have nearly three weeks of time off to look forward to.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:22, Reply)

K2k6
Hurrah for rubbish jokes!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:26, Reply)

Hi Wandrelust
Two nights ago, you joined the exclusive club of b3tans who have appeared in my dreams.

@K2k6: Is that three weeks of unused leave or a three week holiday?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:33, Reply)

'Ello
Just finished my 'assessment centre'. Think I did alright on two exercises, but I'm worried I might have fucked up on the written... not because it was badly written, but because I may have placed the wrong emphasis on the third person rather than the first... arse.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:34, Reply)

@spakka
I feel special now!
I hope it was a nice dream!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:35, Reply)

*fingers crossed for you, DG*
I really hope that comes together for you!

I had a dream about a B3tan on Saturday night. It was quite a lucid dream, so when I woke up I couldn't work out why that person was not in my lounge painting the window frame.

Odd thing, the brain.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:37, Reply)

@spakka
It's a three week holiday.

I haven't dreamt of b3tards, except for the HLT incident of several weeks back. Maybe I need to meet you all first. April it is, then.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:38, Reply)

.
@wanderlust
It was a very nice dream - at least until the point where we were interrupted by the sudden appearance of a little kid dressed up as a fireman.

@Davros' Granddad
Let's hope the assessment went well. Is placing emphasis on the third person a major setback in that kind of assessment?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:40, Reply)

I shall remain undreamed about by K2k6
for the foreseeable future as I won't be there in April.

Unless I pop up there later this year...K2k6, could you cope with the miniest of bashes?
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:41, Reply)

Well
the question began 'how would you...' and I wrote the piece based on how the Agency would...

I panicked slightly after 10 minutes when the document I was working on crashed and I lost all the info I had typed already - bit of a pisser.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:43, Reply)

@spakka
What were we doing to be interrupted? Looking at kittens? Drinking cups of tea?
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:43, Reply)

@clendrix
There are other means of apperaing in your fellow b3tans' dreams.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:45, Reply)

Spak
I do have a picture up.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:47, Reply)

*rushes in
with lips puckered*
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:48, Reply)

@ ancrenne
I'll have a snog in the shower?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:48, Reply)

.
@Davros' Granddad:

Yes, that is a bit of a pisser.

@Wanderlust:

* blushes *

Something much nicer.

EDIT: @clendrix:
But that's just a drawing. It doesn't capture the subtleties and nuances that make up your appearance. Nice drawing BTW.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:49, Reply)

Ethel
no, I'm already there.

Unless the shower is quite roomy...
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:49, Reply)

@ clendrix.
only one thing for it. Mud fight!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:51, Reply)

@spakka
We weren't ummm holding hands were we?!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:52, Reply)

*frowns*
Isn't there some kind of system for snogging?
Priority points?

EDIT: I retract that comment, with grinning.
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:53, Reply)

Fair enough!
*grabs mud*

Thank god the the afternoon is livening up!
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 12:56, Reply)

Mud-fight! Woohoo.
* finds muddy patch *

@wanderlust:
We were ... umm ... holding hands ... in the nuddy. Damn those fireman-uniform clad kids.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:02, Reply)

@ DiT
Mmm! Garibaldis - dead fly biscuits just one of my favourites!

Right, back to work.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:04, Reply)

*cannonballs in to mud*
*flings*

*bathes*

Ah, so soothing...

EDIT: Garibaldi FTW!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:04, Reply)

In other news
One of the companies I applied for has just written back asking if I'm interested in football. Wrote back to say that I only follow the football during international competitions, and that I once played for one of my former company's football teams. Yet if they really are a bunch of football fanatics, I'm not sure if I'll fit in.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:06, Reply)

I can't do mud fighting
*panics*

*grabs fire-hose*
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:07, Reply)

Golly gosh, I am a busy little Bob today
Boss is on his weekly trip into my office, shitloads to do, and it's the work summer party tonight!

How are we all? I have'nt bothered reading all the posts in this thread, that would take aaaages.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:09, Reply)

Spak:
Is the company in any way involved in Sport or Sports Marketing?

If they are, then a key requisite of the role may be in interest in football.

Still, if they're just a bunch of football fanatics, it is weird.

EDIT: Ning Bob, good to see read you!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:14, Reply)

.
Ancrenne: You're on!
* hurls a volley of mudballs in ancrenne's general direction *

BTW: In my industry, likeability scores points. Now if only there was a creative media company run entirely by b3tans.

EDIT: Afternoon BobFossil. We're having a big mudfight today and also discussing how we can appear in eachothers' dreams.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:15, Reply)

Health and Safety?
I don't really do that any more...

Time for a bagel and a big glass of water.
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:16, Reply)

*flings mud pie*
How we can appear in each other's dreams?

As in, on purpose? Go to sleep thinking "I'm going to go and sleep-shout inanities at b3tans in their dreams"? Hmmm.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:19, Reply)

I go down town for a bit
and all hell breaks loose. I love it.

*throws mud pies indiscriminately*

*kinks Kaol's fire hose*

*waits for frown*

I saw two slightly bizarre things down the town today. One was a little old lady in a motorised wheelchair buggy thing, driving it like she thought she was Lewis Hamilton. Nearly knocked me over twice, and she almost wrapped it round a bollard at one point!

The other was the usual piss-poor piper who today was playing "My Heart Will Go On" from Titanic. On the bagpipes. Badly.

I couldn't make up my mind whether to laugh or cry.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:22, Reply)

As an ex-recruiter...
It's perfectly within a company's rights to ask a potential candidate if they have an interest in a particular thing, if that particlar thing has a direct influence on the duties/activities related to the role.

For example, if it was a Marketing firm and the role was focused on Sports Marketing, specifically football, it would be beneficial for the candidate to have at least a passing interest in the game.

However, it you'd be on dodgy ground if you rejected a candidate just for that reason - same as if you rejected a candidate for being too old, or being the wrong sex, or being martian.

God I hated being a recruitment consultant. *loves new job*

EDIT: K2k6, when you say she was driving like Lewis, do you mean she had a puncture in the front left tyre?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:25, Reply)

my team leader has just turned 30
and has brought a huge supply of cakes in for the office

I am now liberally smeared with cream from the enormous cream slice I just ate.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:31, Reply)

@DiT
Heh! Yes, at one point she was driving like she had a puncture, actually. But she did get down town in good time, as the red buggy in front of her had catastrophic engine failure a bit later!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:32, Reply)

Yes, you're right about that,
as it would have no bearing on your ability to do the job.

Unless you were applying to be a prostitute or something, and I'm not sure there's a strict application/interview/human resources induction process in that particular career path...
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:32, Reply)

Hello
I'm back at the hotel now watching discovery channel. I'm such a geek.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:36, Reply)

.
The company I'm applying for does lots of stuff related to football. They just want to find out if I'll fit in, although to be honest, if they're that into football, I may not feel like I fit in.

I've found that when working for an office-based job, I often went out drinking or doing some other outside-work activity with my colleagues. In a creative line of work, team-bonding is desired. Ideally, we don't want to be a bunch of drones who work from 9-5 (but in practice, we often feel this way).

BTW: if you're still feeling I'm being a bit too enigmatic, Gaz me for more details.

@ancrenne: Asking if you had a boyfriend is taking things too far, but asking if you're a sociable person does help paint a picture about the sort of person that you are. But I agree, ability to do the job should be the foremost consideration, but I've seen or heard of many examples where this isn't the case.

@BobFossil: See a few posts above for my link to a top-tip. But the 'on puropuse' thing doesn't always work - if it did, there'd be no damned kids in fireman-uniforms invading my dreams.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:37, Reply)

I love football!
Yay! Foorball FTW!
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:39, Reply)

@ancrenne
I wasn't, merely highlighting that I was covered in cream. as you do. :-)

I must have missed the mud fight; I haven't read back through a lot of the thread
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:41, Reply)

When
has ancrenne been covered in cream?

no pics = didn't happen :(
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:42, Reply)

Also need pics
of Vipros covered in cream.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:43, Reply)

unfortunately I've got a meeting
so I had to wipe the cream off before I could take any pics....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:46, Reply)

Waste
of 2 perfectly good creamy subjects.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:48, Reply)

Ethel
we'll just have to use our imaginations.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:48, Reply)

Clendrix
Do you like cream? ;-)
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:49, Reply)

.
* sneaks up to ancrenne's feet *

* Throws mudpies upwards in the gap between the visor and the face *

@K2k6: If she knocked you down twice, was she doing laps?
Re piper: I'd laugh.

@Vipros re the mudfight: It started off with people fighting for their place in the queue to snog ancrenne, but escallated into ancrenne wanting to take wanderlust from my dreams. I am now fighting this mudfight on two fronts - b3taland and my dream-land. If necessary, I'll use cream too.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:50, Reply)

Ethel
as it happens...
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:52, Reply)

@spakka
you dreamt about me in the nuddy?
Sure it wasn't a nightmare?!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:53, Reply)

*dreams*
of ancrenne dreaming of wanderlust in the nuddy.

*swoons*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:56, Reply)

Yay, Friday!
Good stuff.
( Cawl, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:56, Reply)

Friday!
Can't wait!
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:56, Reply)

expect
massive hugs!
I am very, very excited.
Four more sleeps till fun times!!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 13:59, Reply)

I got a reply back from the company.
They're asking me two questions. One's about C++, and the other is asking me to pick the starting formation I would play in my favourite team and to state the reasons for my decisions.

I can manage the C++ one but I don't follow football enough to properly answer the second question. Perhaps I should skip this company.

This epic mudfight sounds much more fun than composing my favourite football team.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:00, Reply)

Spak
Attacking mid-field. Team player but with appropriate forward thinking.

However, even better, perhaps drop out of this one. Obviously wrong for you.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:04, Reply)

Wow, they really *do* like footy, don't they?
If it sounds like it's a bit too much football for you, I'd say give it a miss.

Wait for the right opportunity, otherwise you'll regret it!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:05, Reply)

.
@wanderlust:
It wasn't a nightmare, although things did get a bit surreal at one point. * blushes *

@ancrenne:
I won't be there on Friday. I think two fronts is enough for me on this mudfight. Opening up a third front in the real world will exhaust my supply of mudballs.

@ethelred:
So now you're trying to bring this into "dream inside a dream" land. This is one of the best mudfights ever.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:07, Reply)

OMFG
I've done nothing. Fuck all! I am going to be sacked if I don't start pulling some motivation out of somewhere.
*sighs*
*resumes staring out of window*
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:18, Reply)

.
@clendrix & DiT:
I think you're right there. I may give this one a miss. I only follow football when there's an international competition going on (European Cup or World Cup) and I am by no means a football fanatic.

Anyway, I've applied to four other companies (one of whom wrote back to me to say they'd be sending me an assessment sometime during the week) and am thinking of sending off more applications soon.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:20, Reply)

*offers clendrix bag of motivation*
*becomes muse*

What do you need motivation for?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:22, Reply)

Spak
Send off as many apps as you can bear to.

DiT: I have lots of work, but I just can't seem to get on with it. Nothing to do with my b3ta friends! Just need good solid kick up the arse. Please help...

*offers arse*
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:22, Reply)

Very soon
ancrenne and clendrix will be living under the railway arches.

*prepares to grow beard*
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:24, Reply)

Hello everyone.
Poor Spakkaman.

I dread having to go throught the rigmarole of looking for work again.

*shudders*

I didn't need an interview for my current job. I work for my dad.

@Clendrix - maybe it's because your going on your hols soon. That can be a bugger for motivation.
( girlinthehole, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:25, Reply)

@clendrix
You've probably not missed much when you missed staring out the window, but now that you're looking out again, I'm sure that all the interesting happenings have been saving themselves up for when you next look out the window.

* gives out the hug of motivation *

Do you think 20 applications is too much or should I limit myself to 10? Bear in mind that some of these companies are likely to send me some do-at-home assessments.

EDIT: * Throws mudballs at clendrix's arse *
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:27, Reply)

@ancrenne
He's already adopted one and taken on 3 other daughters so I don't think he's looking for any more : )
( girlinthehole, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:28, Reply)

mister spakka-ka-ka-ka
I did 111 applications over 18 months when i left college. Got 9 replies, 1 interview.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:29, Reply)

Ethel!
Hahahahahaha - I love your encouragement style!
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:30, Reply)

Clen
No beating around the bush, the boy needs to see real life.

Did destroy my confidence a fair bit though I must admit!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:32, Reply)

@Ethelred
I had my share of confidence-destroying when I was searching for jobs post-uni. Must have sent off more than 200 applications and gone through 20 interviews. Did get a job out of it in the end.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:36, Reply)

Real pain
is trying to escape the career of recruitment consultancy. 2 years I did, and it took me 18 months and well over 300 applications to get out of it.

If your a graduate and reading this: unless you really, really want to be a recruitment consultant, never take the job as a stop-gap, because it's anything but.

But still, I'm happy now! (Although I'd be happier if I worked for Aston Martin...)

EDIT: Good luck to the jobseekers! *vibes*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:47, Reply)

@ancrenne
Looking for work again so soon?

How's the pants going?

EDIT: Thanks DiT
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:48, Reply)

ah
I see I've turned up at an appropriate time. Job seekers advice!
Good luck spakka, I am too applying for every position that looks suitable.
*deep breath* and back to the recruitment websites.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:52, Reply)

@Ancrenne
I would imagine it will take quite a while for your pants idea to get off the ground.

How about filling in as a barefoot pole dancer : )
( girlinthehole, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:56, Reply)

How about...
Temping, ancrenne? I know it's poo, but it does mean you have no responsibilities to the company so when your pants do take off (fnar!), you can just drop them (the company, not your pants) and get going.

Apols if I'm preaching to the choir, here.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 14:59, Reply)

I've just had a meeting
and now I'm back. So let me get this right -

The mudfight has turned into thoughts of dreaming.

People are dreaming of others dreaming of others.

Most of this is in the nuddy.

Ancrenne's waiting for her pants to be taken off.

Have I got it correct?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:02, Reply)

K2k6
^I think you could write that on any given day and not be too far off the mark.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:10, Reply)

btw - can anyone
explain the world's oldest joke to me?

"Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap."

it is going on about queefing? or men blaming women for farting? or what? argh!

i am dumber than a 3908 year old. this cannot be good.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:11, Reply)

@ rachel
I'm at a loss with that also.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:14, Reply)

@rswipe
I don't get it either....

I just had a slightly tense meeting, but it was ok because I got to listen, then sit forward stroking my beard and deliver my I'm-an-expert-listen-to-me bit while everyone nodded along.

it was fun :-)

how is everyone elses monday going?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:16, Reply)

Apparently
the women of ancient times were more openly flatulent than they are now. So the implication is that young women invariably farted on their husbands' laps.

The joke was akin to saying "For the first time in recorded history, a French woman did not smell like stale cigarettes and garlic."
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:17, Reply)

@Rswipe
I think the joke got lost in translation : )

*ancrenne. - thinking man's pole dancer.....could happen.
( girlinthehole, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:19, Reply)

ah, loon
thank you. that has been irritating me for days!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:24, Reply)

I do like the idea
of a thinking man's pole dancer.

Although it would help my thought processes if she got her tits out, so it's probably not the job for you, ancrenne.

@rswipe - I have no idea what that's all about. It's not nearly as good as wanderlust's cheetah joke from earlier today. I've been chuckling about that ever since.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:26, Reply)

No prob.
It took me a few minutes to figure it out as well.

This just in- Generalissimo Franco is still dead!
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:28, Reply)

@ancrenne
I know....but it did make me smile to myself at the thought for a while.


My most favorite joke in the whole wide world is the 'what's brown and sticky' joke.

First time I heard that, (and it wasn't that long ago), I thought I was going to die

laughing. I found it in my nephew's children's joke book.


I am a women of simple tastes....even with jokes.
( girlinthehole, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:31, Reply)

Simple Joke Ahoy!
What's big and white and if it falls out of a tree it'll kill you?

A fridge.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:34, Reply)

Why did the Dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens weren't invented yet.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:36, Reply)

Why didn't the ghost go to the dance?
Because he had no body to go with!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:39, Reply)

Why did Snoop Dogg need an umbrella?
Fo Drizzle
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:44, Reply)

How do you know you've got elephants in your fridge?
footprints in the butter.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:44, Reply)

Why did the shore blush?
Because the sea weed.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:46, Reply)

Why do cowboys ride horses?
Because they are too heavy to carry.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:46, Reply)

Oooo! I forget to tell you all.
Going home on Friday afternoon I actually came across a chicken crossing the road to where I live.

It looked lost, poor thing.
( girlinthehole, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:46, Reply)

According to Wikipedia
these are the world's funniest jokes.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:46, Reply)

@BGB
Were you expecting fowl play?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:47, Reply)

What do you call a fake dog turd?
Sham-poo.

/Coat...

*EDIT* 200! Woo!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:48, Reply)

What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:51, Reply)

This is worse
than work.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:51, Reply)

what's orange and sounds like a parrot?
a carrot

@Ethelred: that one is excellent
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:51, Reply)

@Al
I daren't click that link in case the joke is deadly!

EDIT: What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:53, Reply)

What do you call someone who covers their rude bits in chickpeas?
A humousexual
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:53, Reply)

What do you call an Egyptian carpenter?
Ahmed Ashed...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:54, Reply)

What do you call
a deer with no eyes?

No eye deer. (Say it aloud.)

...a deer with no eyes and no legs?

Still no eye deer.

...a dog with no legs?

Doesn't matter- it's still not going to come when you call it.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:54, Reply)

what do you call
a chicken in a shell suit?

an egg.



edit: i LOVE cracking this shit joke... a-hen and a-hen... even if it makes people think i am a cock... which is eggsactly what they were eggspecting... etc etc...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:55, Reply)

what do you call a russian with three testicles?
Whodya Nickabollokof
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:56, Reply)

Why does Rupert the Bear wear checked trousers?
'Cause he's a cunt.

(courtesy of Legless).

'lo ancrenne.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:57, Reply)

how do you define adultery?

putting yourself in someone else's position.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 15:58, Reply)

Why did the chicken cross the möbius strip?
To get to the same side.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:01, Reply)

3 dog shites on the pavement
Which one's the musketeer?

The dark tan yin.

(Yeah, OK, it's a Scots one)
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:04, Reply)

@al
that penguin joke is genius!
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:04, Reply)

a man came home to his wife and told her that his
manhood was caught in the pickle slicer and he was fired.

she unzipped his pants and asked him, "why, its alright, where's the pickle slicer?"

"oh, she got fired too!"
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:07, Reply)

@al
I actually can't stop laughing.
My boss asked me what's so funny and she just gave me a blank look when I told her.
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:08, Reply)

What do you call a man
with a spade in his head?

Doug.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:10, Reply)

OMG! What have I started.
I'n off home folks....byeeeeee!
( girlinthehole, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:12, Reply)

it is a good 'un
it got forwarded to the rest of my band, and that only happens with the best jokes :-)

what do you call a man with 50 rabbits up his bum?


warren
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:16, Reply)

Long one (ish)
So, this guy is involved in a horrific accident, whereupon his manhood is severed. The surgeons try in vain to reattach it, but fail spectacularly.

On being told the news, the poor bloke is more than a little upset. “Isn’t there anything you can do?” he asks. The surgeon thinks for a bit, rubs his chin, and replies, “Well, I have heard of a revolutionary new technique, where the trunk of a baby elephant is grafted on. It’s a long shot, but may be worth a shot”.

“I’ll try anything,” comes the desperate response.

Six months later and the op is a resounding success. The guy is invited to parties and is generally a big hit with the ladies. One evening, at a particularly well attended party, all the guests are enjoying dinner, including our elephant-proportioned hero. He’s regaling his audience with amusing tales, when suddenly he feels a stirring in the trouser department. Before he can do anything, his trunk bursts forth from his flies, waves around in the air for a bit, then homes in on the nearest bread roll, grabs it, then snakes back inside his trousers.

The guests are dumbstruck for a few seconds, then one of them remarks, “That is probably the most incredible thing I’ve ever seen. Go on, do it again”.

“I’d love to”, our hero replies, “but I don’t think I can fit another bread roll up my arse”.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:18, Reply)

@DG
*applauds*

that's brilliant
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:21, Reply)

I can't take the credit
but forget where I heard it.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:22, Reply)

last one from me
A snail walks into a pub and orders a pint.
"Sorry mate" says the barman, "we don't serve snails."

The snail is not happy at hearing this and starts mouthing off to the barman, saying rude things about his mum and his ability to satisfy his girlfriend.

The barman eventually gets bored of the snail's aggressive ways so picks him up and throws him to the bottom of the pub garden.

A year later the sail returns to the pub and approaches the barman.
"Oi you prick!" He shouts, "What the hell did you do that for?"
( wanderlust, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:22, Reply)

Why shouldn't you wear Russian pants?
Chernobyl fallout.

Ahahahahahaha.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:23, Reply)

what is the lightest organ?

a penis, a mere thought can raise it.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:23, Reply)

FFS!
Stop!
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:26, Reply)

Sorry
Miss Clendrix :-(
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:27, Reply)

I need a beer and a smoke.
Then I will be fine.

*grumps*

Edit: *apologises*
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:27, Reply)

*Proffers beer and cigarettes*
Help yourself, lass.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:29, Reply)

@DG
You're a gentleman.








Despite all we've heard.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:30, Reply)

*tempted by cigarettes*
No! No, I mustn't!

OK folks. I would like to get myself a handheld entertainment device for when I go on my holidays. I was thinking about a PSP.

While I like gadgets and computer games, I don't know much about handhelds. Is this a good one?

EDIT: Noon DG. Any feedback yet?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:32, Reply)

@ Clendrix
You askin'?

I get out of here in an hour.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:34, Reply)

Oh Wookie
Thank the lord!!!!!!!!!
Where? When?

Gaz me, for the love of all things BEER!

OK, as you were everyone. Huge sorries for my bad humour. Big stresses, big, big ones. But all work-related, so not really that important in the Great Plan.
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:35, Reply)

clendrix
I shudder to think what you've heard...

@DiT - nope, not yet. HR have fucked up as apparently there was supposed to be a third candidate being interviewed / assessed, but who wasn't there on the day. The person in question has been on leave for a bit and they're not sure whether they got the notification or not...

Did I ever mention that our HR leave a bit to be desired?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:37, Reply)

@ DiT
Not really delved into the realms of the handheld devices, always used my smart-phones for most things.

I'm guessing the PSP is a better all-rounder as you can watch movies and surf using wi-fi, but the Nintendo DS is the gaming market leader for a reason.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:38, Reply)

DG
Teasing - you sound lovely.

How to restore calm:
*listens to eponymous track from 'Heaven and Hell' album*
*smiles*
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:39, Reply)

I've used a PSP
and a DS and I'd go with the DS definitely.

the PSP is basically like a playstation 2 with annoying controls, whereas the DS has a big range of engaging stuff to do on it.

plus, the new mariokart game is quality
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:40, Reply)

Aw, thanks clendrix
I am a veritable gent of the old school order, laying down my flappy coat so delicate ladies don't get their feet wet in puddles.

I've also been known to hold doors open...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:41, Reply)

ancrenne
That's a pisser.

I shall crack open a bottle tonight and together we can toast those who fuck up on a regular basis. It could be days before I hear anything about this morning.

The useless bastards!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:49, Reply)

Why the hell do they do this to us?
What's wrong with people?
*sighs*
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:52, Reply)

Just sent off 4 more job applications
Would have been 5, but one of the companies are using some stupid web-based contact form instead of offering an e-mail address.

@al: I get that penguin joke too, and I like it.

@DiT: Depends on what games you want to play. I keep thinking of getting a PSP just so I can play Loco-Roco. You may also want to consider getting a Nintendo DS or even an iPhone to play games with.

EDIT: @ancrenne: That's just Gah!
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:52, Reply)

There we are then.
I shall go for a DS!

(And as I was really let down by the PS3 I suppose it's a good idea I don't try Sony again...)

EDIT: That's really crap, ancrenne. *shares an internet beer*. Sorry to hear it, I hope it's sorted out ASAP.

DOUBLE EDIT: My iPhone comes on Sept 11th, Spak, and I can't wait! *apple whore*
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:53, Reply)

@DiT re: iPhone:
There's an iPhone developer programme going on that makes it easy for independent developpers to produce games for the iPhone. So expect to see lots of original and groundbreaking games.

EDIT: @ancrenne: Aaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhh too
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:58, Reply)

hey all
I'm back. i've been having ill sleepies. And i'm sorry to ask this but...
Al - i don't get your penguin joke, can you explain it to me please? I think i've had too many painkillers today and am malfunctioning. And it's really going to bother me if I don't find out the joke.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 16:58, Reply)

Everyone seems to be having a bad day
I wonder if this is caused by an abundance of little kids dressed up as firemen doing something behind the scenes?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:01, Reply)

Lucy
basically, all penguins look alike. Therefore asking "What's he look like" is a somewhat redundant question.

I now await al to tell me different...

Which reminds me; A white horse walks into a bar and asks for a whisky.

"What kind?" asks the barman.

"Dunno" says the horse, "What kind have you got?"

"Well" says the barman, and proceeds to rattle off a long list. "We've even got one named after you!"

The horse is amazed. "What, you've got a whiskey called Allan?"
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:03, Reply)

100?
Woo!
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:03, Reply)

Thanks DG
In my fuzzy headed state I thought it was something to do with the Tony bit. I tried saying it aloud a couple of times.
Oh deary me.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:04, Reply)

I thought the Penguin joke
worked due to some anti-climax mechanism (a bit like my "head that looks like an orange" joke from a few weeks ago).
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:06, Reply)

Spak
100 what? Applications?
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:06, Reply)

@clendrix
That's just me claiming the 100th (in Hexadecimal) post.

Am up to 9 applications. Would have been 11 had some of the websites not fucked up.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:08, Reply)

Good grief!
:)
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:14, Reply)

Right
I'm off. Still no news, so I assume it's going to be at least tomorrow now.

Bastards. Again.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:16, Reply)

whoops
I have made the monumental mistake of putting on Charlie and the Chocolate Factory even though there is no chocolate in the house.
Schoolboy error.
Anybody in the London area who can hear suspected earthquakes, don't panic, it's just my tummy rumbling.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:16, Reply)

Bye DG
And bye all - I'm off too.

See y'all tomorrow!
( thealternativefact, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:18, Reply)

One of the websites
had a list of e-mail addresses for different parts of the company (including one for job-applications). But the e-mail bounced saying that the user was not a valid user. Tried the one for general enquiries and the same happened. In the end, had to use some crappy web-contact-form just to say their e-mail addresses were broken. Still not heard back.

EDIT: Bye DG & clendrix
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:19, Reply)

Afternoon folks
How are we all?


I liked the penguin joke. It involved penguins.

Wow, that makes me sound really simple.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:24, Reply)

@POD
We've all been stressed up at work or fustrated trying to find work, so have retreated to b3taland for a massive mudfight.

And you?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:29, Reply)

Hullo PoD!
And bye!

See you all later on, folks!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:29, Reply)

happy happy!
The world isn't all bad people! I have just had a phone call about another group interview on Wednesday. Although this does mean i'm going to need to buy a third ticket home.
anybody need a ticket to the west country from london waterloo on tues or wed?
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:32, Reply)

Sounds like it's been a fun day
I was at work from 7:30. It wasn't fun.

Stupid customers.

I did consider quitting, but didn't think I would be-able to find something else to keep money coming in until I go back to uni.

I also discovered that a fun side effect of my anti-inflammitory things is that it makes you feel like a man is standing punching you in the stomach. Oh, and they don't work as anti-inflammitories either.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:32, Reply)

@Ancrenne
Normally I like the world too. But today I've been feeling crappy and have been applying for jobs since March and this is only the second interview I have been offered. So the world looks a bit shinier now.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 4 Aug 2008, 17:38, Reply)

I'm trying to not think about getting a job
I am paid up to the 31st of August. After that, fuck knows what's going to happen.
I've sent out 30 applications and had 3 interviews.
I've already talked to the mortgage company about putting the payments on hold.

It all sucks.

But the upside is I'm having 6 weeks of paid holiday!
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 4 Aug 2008, 18:02, Reply)