With it being Friday morning i am, as usual, at the soft play centre. What regular routines do you find yourself in?
Other than boffing MM obvs.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:20, 142 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

I regularly get the 05:58 to St Pancras, where I regularly take the Piccadilly line to Holloway Road, where I regularly have a coffee before ambling to work.
I don't have any regular weekly activities I can think of.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:24, Reply)

Sheena Easton lost her touch.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:26, Reply)

Well played

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:29, Reply)

Work, bitch.
Weekends are a bit samey, but I much prefer them to the old ones where I was poppered up in some gay club at 5am.

Dog days are over.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:26, Reply)

WAtch out for the loose bumflaps.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:28, Reply)

Sinks ships

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:29, Reply)

I lile when it's my turn to take daughter here.
Catching up on the yummy mummies, for a deposit in the wank bank. Does this make me dirty?
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:26, Reply)

I can't imagine the 'yummy mummy's' being too dolled up for soft play.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:27, Reply)

You'd be surprised. There's some tidy ones here most weeks.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:29, Reply)

You get some good tit shots and thong peeks

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:37, Reply)

Y'know, I can't for the life of me understand why we don't get more women posting on here

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:42, Reply)

Made me laugh!

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:47, Reply)

Divorcees trying to ensnare their next meal ticket.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:42, Reply)

I like the sweaty look.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:29, Reply)

How long has it been since your wife last allowed you to touch her?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:28, Reply)

Been together 11 years.
Gets a bit samey
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:31, Reply)

I'm off to our local one tomorrow with Son #1 as he has a party there

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:37, Reply)

Terrible child favouritism.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:43, Reply)

boffing YD

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:38, Reply)

Soft play centres are awesome.
They really do need to make one solely for adults.
( Muns, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:41, Reply)

Through the technology of magic and blessings, would you rather be
A: really really rich, but unable to ever have sex with anyone ever ever again.

or

B: completely penniless for the rest of your life but able to have sex with absolutely anyone you chose?
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:41, Reply)

I've been 'B' for 33 years so I'd give 'A' a go.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:42, Reply)

+ent
+nal
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:44, Reply)

Excellent strikethroughisming here.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:46, Reply)

id be a pretty poor quality bender if i hadnt done bumming by now

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:47, Reply)

Have you boffed Rachel yet?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:45, Reply)

no you fucking wouldn't

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:49, Reply)

yeah i might

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:59, Reply)

A.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:44, Reply)

Isn't that your current situation anyway?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:45, Reply)

A. You can always wank off to paid for live whore action.
You can still touch, right?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:44, Reply)

NO!
NO TOUCHING!

TOUCHING EQUALS INSTANT HORRIBLE DEATH!
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:46, Reply)

Still rather be a rich wanker

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:05, Reply)

A.
It's worked out quite well for Cliff Richard.
( Muns, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:49, Reply)

interesting
he looks like a creepy plastic doll
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:50, Reply)

True.
But he's got enough money not to give a fuck.
( Muns, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:52, Reply)

Living Doll.
So *that's* what that documentary was about...

Sicko.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:53, Reply)

That was a fun documentary.
As usual, it invited you to point and laugh at the freaks.

Which we did.

In the end, however, it just struck me as gimp fetishism. It was a bit uncomfortable, sure - imagine going 'round to see your mate and they insisted on wearing their gimp outfit - impractical for one thing, but it also raised the questions - are these men (they were all men) trying to be ... their ideal woman? Be a woman? Think they are women?

We concluded they were just freaks, and resumed pointing and laughing at them.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:02, Reply)

That pensioner one too... Takes all sorts.
To each, his own.

I like the way they had it on right after Benefits Street. In case you weren't already riled enough.

I love Channel 4.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:06, Reply)

I didn't get through all of Benefits Street.
It struck me as very, very divisive. "Look at these scum! Look at them!"

It's dolies and forrins - the tories are proper going for the divide and conquer routine at the moment - immigrants! Arrgh! Dole scum! Arrrgh! YOU, THE WORKING PEOPLE OF BRITAIN, ARE PAYING - PAYING for this, this ...

this FILTH!

Pretty nasty stuff.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:11, Reply)

You can say that but at the end of the day, isn't that what they are?
I know it didn't show two sides to the story but I know estates exactly like that, as I'm sure you do.

Who knows, maybe they will have a lovely ending and get jobs.

The pitch fork reaction was a bit extreme though, people tweeting them death threats and the like.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:19, Reply)

It's nice that C4 are fulfilling their public service remit by helping us to hate poor people and the mentally ill.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:12, Reply)

why have they singled me out?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:12, Reply)

They can't be cutting edge all the time.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:17, Reply)

and who's to say them dolly chaps are mentally ill?
Terrible bullying.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:18, Reply)

To be fair, I only saw a two minute clip someone posted somewhere.
But the chap in it who was injecting saline directly into his chest didn't strike me as particularly mentally stable.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:23, Reply)

That I don't understand.
People shoot that stuff into their cocks and allsorts.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:32, Reply)

Not licorice.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:32, Reply)

i had to go to one of those ghastly head over heels places with my friend's kids the other week
talk about the seventh circle of hell - screeeeeaming kids everywhere, stressed parents, boiling hot, nowhere to sit, 30 min queue in the café, 75 min wait for food... vile. but it was worth it all to see our other friend, who brought her newborn. when she realised she was staring into her future weekends, her face was a fucking picture.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:49, Reply)

Hahahahaha I like this!
Of particular lol is parents who complain about having no sleep/money/time, and make snide jokes about "Take my kids - please!" but tell you that they're the best thing that ever happened to them.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:51, Reply)

lawl
www.airsexworld.com/
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:51, Reply)

Not clicking that. Could be a virus, soz.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:53, Reply)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:55, Reply)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:54, Reply)

Oh... Ok.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:57, Reply)

this is actually a thing?
why?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:58, Reply)

Apparently according to the DM, it's coming to Britian too.
Best get practicing.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:02, Reply)

I'll stick to my *actual* sex, thanks.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:07, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2180060
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:09, Reply)

anal cock wank

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:11, Reply)

Still a damn sight better than sucking air.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:16, Reply)

I saw this and for some reason thought of Rory

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 10:55, Reply)

I suppose the only real routine Ihave is work

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:15, Reply)

Washing down a handful of fentanyl
with half a bottle of scotch is not really a routine
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:17, Reply)

Hey I do shit!
Surgery, meetings, night cover, bum fingerings. ..
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:20, Reply)

you still aint diagnosed my numb toe though

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:21, Reply)

Hansons I told you

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:23, Reply)

are you a gp?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:25, Reply)

No I am a proper doctor

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:32, Reply)

oh okay, thanks doc. im off to join the colony!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:34, Reply)

I would shake your hand and wish you good luck
but we don't want to risk anything falling off do we
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:41, Reply)

I wouldn't trust a 90's band with my medical issues.
Though they have made their own beer.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:33, Reply)

Did they incorporate their vaginal yeast?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:44, Reply)

Mmmhops, apparently

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:46, Reply)

It is if you do it to a jaunty soundtrack.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:20, Reply)

Yakety sax

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:33, Reply)

alright
I just did a nice poo.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:22, Reply)

Can't beat a good birthday poo

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:24, Reply)

Birthday shit! nice work xx

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:25, Reply)

I even wiped my bum until there was no more brown on the paper!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:26, Reply)

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=draw%20an%20ace
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:28, Reply)

But not as good as:
www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=perfect+poo
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:30, Reply)

As a doctor I contenx there os no such thing.
Unless jizz is involved.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:37, Reply)

No, the perfect poo is real

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:38, Reply)

indeed, its a rare treat

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:39, Reply)

^new bear pookie^

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:40, Reply)

You learn something new every day on here.
Moreso if you are me.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:34, Reply)

its nice that we can educate you and help shape you into a better person

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:35, Reply)

It does improve my life.
I have decided to take my gardening matters into my own queer hands.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:48, Reply)

these things never take as long as you think they will, you feel a good sense of achievement when you do stuff youve been putting off innit

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:49, Reply)

What ribbity bollocks here says

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:52, Reply)

I dunno, I quite like it when I get home from work and the man I pay to sort out the garden has done it all for me.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:55, Reply)

thats no way to talk about your wifes bush

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:57, Reply)

Wuthering tights

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:58, Reply)

what?
you pay someone to hurt those poor little plants?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:01, Reply)

He's very tender.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:03, Reply)

i am really surprised at you
what about all the poor insects whose homes and habitat you're so cruelly destroying?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:04, Reply)

Don't be silly, they are welcomed into the yurt as friends.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:10, Reply)

urgh
i'm itchy just thinking about insects now
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:11, Reply)

i.imgur.com/1N8ySU4.jpg
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:16, Reply)

He also sorts your missus out while you are at work.

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:05, Reply)

She seems quite satisfied with the arrangement.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:11, Reply)

I'm decorating too so I was kind of putting it off, but I'm glad B3ta has taught me not to be a lazy cunt.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:53, Reply)

The chances of your ruined anus clearing a perfect poo
are less than 3% sorry to be the bearer
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:40, Reply)

I don't take deliveries up the back, dear.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:48, Reply)

^ half hearted gayer ^

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:53, Reply)

*gapes for acceptance*

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:53, Reply)

That's what you people do isn't it?
Ihave a 'homosexual' patient, and have interviewed him extensively.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:54, Reply)

interviewed fingered
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 11:58, Reply)

Its the only reason I go there

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 10 Jan 2014, 12:06, Reply)