I'm having a great argument with someone who thinks all life is sentient.
I said that there is more non sentient life on the planet than sentient. He's getting all upset but he's going to look a tad stupid when I point out that grass is alive.
( Peej, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:21, 4 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Grass is more sentient than the average b3ta user

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:23, Reply)

B3ta is more sentient than ...
No - hang on.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:24, Reply)

Which one of us is the average user?
And which of us are above and below?
( Peej, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:25, Reply)

You are average, AA is above and Jason is below obviously.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:26, Reply)

AA is the best one on the web

( Peej, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:28, Reply)

see also; showman

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:31, Reply)

*trigger fingers*

(showman, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:46, Reply)

Shut up showman

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:58, Reply)

^

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:59, Reply)

When I were a lad, we were studying geography, and doing averages for whatever reason.
The average person's average wage, average family &c.

The 'thick kid' asked "How many people are average?" and the whole class jumped on him "DUR! GOD YOU'RE STUPID!" &c &c.

I remember thinking at the time "I wonder how many people actually are average."

True story, bro.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:28, Reply)

My wife asked why there are so many idiots around
and I pointed out that nearly half the population are below average intelligence.
( Peej, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:35, Reply)

did she then pat you on your head and say "yes dear"

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:41, Reply)

WITHABOOK!

( Peej, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:52, Reply)

ITS FUNNY COZ ITS A MEME

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:54, Reply)

"Grass feels a form of pain, but its response is to release pheromones
"so when you inhale that beautiful smell of cut grass in summertime, spare a thought for the plants screaming in panic about the madman with the whirling bladed death machine".

/cracked.com
( Kroney, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:30, Reply)

Shut up tangles

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:31, Reply)

Why the aggression? Come over to Coventry and we'll do some motivational yoga
to centre your chi or some shit.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:33, Reply)

+cken

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:34, Reply)

shitcken ?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:42, Reply)

Yeah
They sell it at Aldi
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:51, Reply)

You know what
It wouldn't surprise me.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:54, Reply)

Everyone is tangles today

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:45, Reply)

I love the smell of grass blood in summer.
Also: Petrol.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:37, Reply)

We are having the "if you won a million quid" argument

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:30, Reply)

A million? I'd spend it pretty fucking quick
Pay off the mortgage, new car, college, uni and houses for the kids.
( Peej, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:36, Reply)

plus you could finally pay me for the bins treat

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:39, Reply)

Oh, sorry, I knew you were a slag
but I didn't know you were a prostitute. I'll pop the 20p in the post.
( Peej, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:50, Reply)

thats payment for one and one in advance.

( Peej, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:50, Reply)

You can collect your 5p change later

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:54, Reply)

IT'S EMPOWERING

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 14:01, Reply)

Boats and hoes.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:37, Reply)

and
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:38, Reply)

How big are your boats window boxes?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:38, Reply)

*snigger*

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:42, Reply)

^^TGDGI

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:46, Reply)

+panti

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:51, Reply)

Pantiboats ?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:55, Reply)

pantiand

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:58, Reply)

then why do the fields scream when I walk in them?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 30 Jan 2014, 13:40, Reply)