Grumpy Old B3tans...

Got a complaint? Want a good old moan? Something / somebody pissed you off and left your metaphorical cheese out in the wind?

LET IT OUT!

No matter how life changing or insignificant you may think it is, please feel free to insert your frustrations and general anger at the world into this flushable depository.

I offer no solutions…it’s just that sharing makes you feel better, you know. Also, seeing other people’s problems might make you think that yours aren’t quite that bad after all.

Let me get the ball rolling with….this week’s QOTW. I mean, what were they thinking?
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Fri 15 Aug 2008, 12:54, 28 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

*puts up hand gets microphone*
People who ask me time related questions via email or facebook when they have my phone number.

Whilst a trivial point it annoys me further when they the phone me up after it's too late for me to answer and ask why I didn't answer!!

Why the fook did you just not call me in the first place!! arrrrrggggghhhhhhhhhh

*sits back down*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 12:58, Reply)

^this
if something is important DON'T USE FACEBOOK

landline answerphones are the same. mrs vipros and I never answer the landline, because it is a non-wireless one on the floor in the living room, too far away from the kitchen or the bedroom to get to in time.

still our parents persist in leaving messages on there and getting arsey with us when we don't respond.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:04, Reply)

Any answer phones
I hate it when people leave answer phone messages anywhere. Am i being unerasonable? It cost me money to pick up, my voicemail clearly says I won't be listenign to them, and to either try me again or send me a text, so why oh why do I still get them?
(weekirst23 Is broken! Silly ice. Silly High heels!, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:09, Reply)

emails
with the annoying little phrase at the bottom like

Think Of The Environment - Please Think Before You Print

How about, turn off your printer and just not buy any A4 paper, that'll save the environment a lot quicker than a smug tag line you dumb fucking cunts!!

nb. Please do not do this, I work for a Stationery wholesaler and will get laid off.
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:16, Reply)

Toomany people are moaning about this week's QOTW

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:20, Reply)

*Vents spleen*
Families - why do I love them so much but have an overwhelming urge to slaughter the lot of them after spending more than 1/2 a day with them?

Men - why can't they say what's going on in their heads. I don't want deep and meaningful, just the nitty gritty of what they feel about something so I don't have to second guess all the time.


Hair - why won't it grow faster?

There's more but I think I better stop now before I get carried away....literally.
( girlinthehole, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:22, Reply)

arf.
I think all right-thinking people in this country are sick and tired of being told that ordinary, decent people are fed up in this country with being sick and tired.

I'm certainly not... but I'm sick and tired of being told that I am.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:39, Reply)

White people pretending to be black (and vice versa).
I believe they’re called ‘wiggers’ or something?

It is cringeworthy, I have just seen a gaggle of kids with their bling, their poses and their pointy finger ‘pretend gun’ action…no doubt 'hanging' before they go home to their middle class families to be tucked into beddybyes by mumsy with some ovaltine.

Grr

And so called ‘R&B’ music having fuck all to do with Rythmn and Blues
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:40, Reply)

What Madam Marlboro said!
Wish I could click replies.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:48, Reply)

@BGB
men have no feelings.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 13:58, Reply)

You really asked for it didn't you?
What'll come as no surprise:

1) This fucking dreadful government and their continued battle against civil liberties

2) The fact that we won't get rid of them anytime soon

3) Guy Fawkes. Where are you now that your country really needs you?

What you probably aren't expecting:

1) The lack of an update from my Job Agency regarding a second interview I was supposedly a favoured candidate for.

2) That our ISP has got problems accessing certain sites, including my hotmail account so I can't fire off an email chasing the above.

3) That I'm writing a long and emo post that simply won't come together in the way I want it to.

I'm quite angry today, me.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 15 Aug 2008, 14:00, Reply)

men
Perhaps feelings is too strong a word indeed, but they have opinions that sometimes would be better voiced sooner rather than later... You're just as hard to understand as women!

-Edit- my hotmail is buggered today too! :(
(weekirst23 Is broken! Silly ice. Silly High heels!, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 14:01, Reply)

Government adverts
on the radio about "Alcohol - Know your limits"

The likelyhood of someone willing to pull her best friend's hair out after having a tipple, or "get them out for every passing car" is unlikely to stop such activity after hearing a stereotype "cool bird" ask her if she does it via the radio medium.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 14:03, Reply)

damn you PJM
for getting me to read those articles

now I'm bubbling with fury
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 14:06, Reply)

Men don't say what's going on in their heads
because quite a lot of the time nothing is beyond the normal background "she'sgotanicebum/boobs/legsifancyapintIhopetheteamwinstonightshe'sgotanicebum" burble.

Edit: If we say "I don't care" believe me, we don't. Keep pushing it and you'll just get wound up.
( Kroney, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 14:52, Reply)

PJM
I'd like to say I was surprised, but once again this piss-poor bunch of ex student union activists, Oxbridge educated lawyers pretending to be socialists, union reps and over-privileged never-had-a-real-job-in-their-fucking-lives professional politicians have greased there way out of the cack. Good on the two chappies who demanded the dosh back, the rest, well, just like PFI, this will return to haunt them (and us). I wonder what the incentives were this time around? Peerages are tres obvious these days...

To up the geek factor a smidge, Broon et al (and previously Dubya and the Florida result) have exhibited behaviour worthy of President Julito Zapilote. A virtual shiny penny for those who can ID the source. No Googling please.
(osok Rebel without a clue, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 14:55, Reply)

Ooh ooh....
Zapolite.... Isn't he a fictional third world dictator satirised in a famous post war play?

Damned if I can remember who wrote it.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 15 Aug 2008, 15:08, Reply)

Not so high-brow
Fictional yes. Dictator yes. Published in 1982, allegedly influenced by the whole Watergate malarkey and various South American chaps in ornate uniforms, and it's a comedy.
(osok Rebel without a clue, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 15:18, Reply)

@Mr TwistyCheeky
Re: 'Wiggaz'
Does this work in reverse?
Are black people who pretend to be white called 'Blonkeys'?
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 15:37, Reply)

townies
or chavs, whatever. They don't work yet they can afford to buy big fuck off plasma TVs to play their X-Box live on in between watching Jeremy Kyle and Loose Women, all whilst I'm at work paying for that privilege.

They pop out children annually and teach them how to shoplift instead of how to read and for every child they spawn into the world they get another neat sum tacked onto their weekly scrounge, again paid for by my hard work (ok not hard work, but in the very least my attendance at my place of work on a daily basis).

They're rude and threatening, like some of the less intelligent species of ape, to anyone who is from a different square foot of territory than them. They take over entire estates with this attitude which they then destroy with their petty vandalism, littering and general disregard for the environment and anything else in the vicinity. They pay little to no rent on these places, another sweet benefit they receive that I am funding with almost a quarter of my wage every month.

They are a blight on society and an aggravation if not direct threat and cause of suffering to me on a daily basis.

So basically, because of the townies of society I am paying to piss myself off, steal my own car and vandalise my own property.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 15:40, Reply)

^^What Kitty said
I've never been unemployed (thank dog) but my friend works in the JobCentre (or whatever they're calling it this week) and these scumbags come in and turn down every job on offer. Then turn around and moan that the Polish are "stealing their jobs".

She got threatened with disciplinary action for asking one such bone idle oxygen thief how someone could steal something he'd never had.

Also, could someone do a "Final Solution" on the junkies who're currently blighting our wee local shopping centre? I think it's now part of the local ecilop routine to show up at the same time every day and move them on. I did suggest to the pharmacist that he slip something extra into their methadone, but so far he's resisted temptation.
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Fri 15 Aug 2008, 16:03, Reply)

@ Al
I was going to say about that when you mentioned the M25 earlier, but noticed your post too late :(
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 16:32, Reply)

I'm currently on hold
awaiting the delights of Orange customer 'services'. I've been waiting for 30 minutes to point out I'm paying for services I cannot access.

I swear to fucking god I'm going to stab someone.
( thealternativefact, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 16:35, Reply)

Bloody foreign tourists!
Took my Daughter to techniquest yesterday.

There was this family of fat Germans with nasty fat German kids who had no concept of waiting their turn and think its acceptable to laugh when their big fat 10 year old son pushed my 4 year old Daughter flying to butt into the queue for an exhibit.

I have a rule to never intervene in my Daughters squabbles with other kids but when I saw that fat fucking Nazi father and his heffer of a wife laughing and pointing at my Daughter being thrown to the floor by their hellspawn who was 3 times her size I gave them a right fucking piece of my mind. Scared the bastard father silly in fact and got a generous round of applause from surrounding parents who had also had to put up with little fucking Herman and Hilta or whatever their kids names were behaving like little arseholes.

Fucks sake! and people try and say that Brits abroad are the worst.
( RadG Drinking Mojitos in the sun, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 16:39, Reply)

M25 Protester
Well, when I'm running the country, instead of getting the H&S obsessed out to say "Quick! There's a leaf on the M25, let's close two lanes immediately!", I'll have a Police marksman on hand to remove the pillock protester from the gantry.

Anyone got issue with that?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 15 Aug 2008, 16:41, Reply)

@PJM
As long as you let me horsewhip the clunker Broon out of Downing street, up the Mall and all the way back to Scotland, sending him homeward where the traitorous thief can think again, then I will vote for you and give you carte blanche with the snipers.
( RadG Drinking Mojitos in the sun, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 16:47, Reply)

People using facebook for when email/phone/msn is obviously better
People leaving answerphone messages to say they will call back.
>..<

Charvas (chavs for you southerners).

My parents after 12 hours.

My parents inability to do anything sensible if there's a more expensive/laborious/convoluted option.
(Shippy likes linebreaks and doesn't care what you think, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 16:52, Reply)

Update
I just spoke to the most amazing woman in customer services - she calmed me down, fixed everything and sent me on my way (and she was lovely!).
*puts away knife*
( thealternativefact, Fri 15 Aug 2008, 16:55, Reply)