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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Hello "Off The Topics", we all good? That's Lovely.
What you up to this week?
I will be mainly transferring music to an external hard drive so it's not making my PC run slow. Lovely. What else is lovely?

Alt. Anyone like Gogglebox? Who do you like? I love the pissed up couple.
What else do you like?

AltAlt. What's on your mind? Ask B3ta anything.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:02, 122 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
mantronix is like a pretty gay name for a band innit

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:09, Reply)
Very.
Not kurtis Mantronik? 'How Did You Know' was a tune.
A lot of things in the 80's were bent though.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:13, Reply)
kurtis blow is like a pretty gay name for a band innit

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:20, Reply)
I always thought oasis was a really gay name for a band

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:15, Reply)
Bum loving felch bandits
is a very gay name for a band
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:17, Reply)
Fudge Tunnel is a very bent name

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:18, Reply)
I saw them live
They were "shit"
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:18, Reply)
I heard an album of theirs too
It was complete "arse"
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:22, Reply)
I like Nailbomb, that thing Alex Newport did with Max Cavalera

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:22, Reply)
Did they play the Admiral Duncan in London?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:25, Reply)
no

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:26, Reply)
free to b3tans

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:28, Reply)
it sounds like somewhere your hamster might live

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:18, Reply)
Sparkly Rainbow Shit Nuggets

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:21, Reply)
Why are children allowed on trains during rush hour?
And why are they allowed seats?
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:15, Reply)
because everybody hates you

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:16, Reply)
:(

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:23, Reply)
as long as you have a face there will always be somewhere for a child to sit
You filthy noncer
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:17, Reply)
I hate kids in restaurants.
That should be adults only unless it's a TGI Fridays or some other council hole disguising itself as a restaurant.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:20, Reply)
Gah. Pubs, restaurants, cinemas ...
I liked that story that went around last week about the chap in America who shot someone in the cinema for playing on their mobile 'phone.

The reaction seemed to be "Yeah - to be honest; I'd do the same ... "
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:23, Reply)
He was an ex copper or something too.
The guy he shot was texting through the ads. Some people are so touchy.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:26, Reply)
I bet the phone was a Motorola Startac

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:27, Reply)
+old people.
+muzzers.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:20, Reply)
+women

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:21, Reply)
You mean "cunt".
As in, "Why is all this cunt on the bus? When it should be home sucking my dick!".
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:23, Reply)
They don't need seats, they sit down all day anyway, because all women(or 'cunts') do secretarial or administration work, if they aren't too lazy to even get a job in the first place.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:24, Reply)
They sould just stay on their backs.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:25, Reply)
That should be the assumed position when all the housework and cooking is done, and when I say 'done' I mean done PROPERLY

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:26, Reply)
Fucking slags.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:36, Reply)
This week I will be mainly doing fuck all
Alt:
Gogglebox is ok. The pissed couple are the best ones on there

AltAlt:
Olives stuffed with jellypenos
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:19, Reply)
I want to stay at their hotel but you'd never see them.
and it's pricey.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:21, Reply)
Work, rehearsing, gig, er... that's it
Alt: Don't know what that is, soz.

Altalt: How can you tell if a girl likes you?
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:21, Reply)
she pisses in your mouth

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:22, Reply)
^

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:27, Reply)
Girls are a hard one to fathom. Men are a lot more straight forward with how they are feeling.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:27, Reply)
yeah, you know all about women, eh

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:28, Reply)
I know more than most do. Who do you think they moan about you to?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:33, Reply)
other women

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:33, Reply)
Not really.
Look for a patch on the floor. Like a car with a leaking radiator.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:38, Reply)
'dripping like a fucked fridge'

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:39, Reply)
As little as possible until pay day on Friday.
Alt: No idea what that is.
Altalt: The burrito I will be having for lunch.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:22, Reply)
What kind of cunt gets paid in the middle of the month?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:25, Reply)
a monoped Jew cunt

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:25, Reply)
Merkin firm.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:26, Reply)
actually, our payday is the 20th.
Three weeks in arrears, one week in advance.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:27, Reply)
We are 2 and 2.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:31, Reply)
You and Monty (4evainrhartz) were 'trending' on facebook yesterday

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:33, Reply)
Eh?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:33, Reply)
Your ugly mugs were on there, as posted by LiC

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:36, Reply)
Ahh. The one where we look deliberately miserable?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:38, Reply)
You look like a couple of guys who lost their homes

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:39, Reply)
That's it!
I don't think I've been on twatter before. This seriously compromises my internet security.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:40, Reply)
Your mug has been on FB loads of times.
Enough that I am considering closing my account, you ugly fackin' cahnt.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:41, Reply)
Whaaaa?
I had no idea.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:42, Reply)
Yep. The One-Legged Lummox of Lewisham.
You're a fucking legend on there. Children no longer worry about the bogeyman, that's fo' sho'.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:44, Reply)
It's not all bad then.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:45, Reply)
That's why it was on Facebook.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:42, Reply)
The one where you're giving the Fonz a run for his money on the slick hair front.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:40, Reply)
It's well long. I need to get it cut.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:41, Reply)
Or....
....PONYTAIL?
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:43, Reply)
Hahaha. I suggested this to the Mrs, she was less than impressed.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:44, Reply)
Personally, I think the Monty style 'top knot' would also work well with your 'unique' look ;)

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:46, Reply)
Can't really see it.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:47, Reply)
Use a mirror.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:49, Reply)
Quite short at the front though, eh

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:45, Reply)
MULLET!

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:45, Reply)
It's almost at mullet now.
I used to love a mullet. In the 80's and early nineties.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:47, Reply)
MULLET SOLUTION

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:45, Reply)
i showed it to a friend
she thinks you're fit.

that's about 7 of my mates who have expressed a similar view when they've seen you on my fb.

what is the matter with my friends?
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:12, Reply)
Were you both at Lusty's birthday?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:43, Reply)
Yer.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:44, Reply)
Cool

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:45, Reply)
100% True Story -
I took a screenshot of Stunned's face, put it into google image search, and it came up with this.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2506292/One-man-crimewave-boasted-outrun-10-police-officers-jailed-again.html
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:40, Reply)
*something about London drunks*

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:38, Reply)
haha the mad old tosser Lee Scratch Perry is playing York on Thursday.
The waqqi twat.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:33, Reply)
Lovely.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:35, Reply)
I hear Doctor Best Troll had a shit time in York, what were the chances eh

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:37, Reply)
He must have went to the wrong places. Where did you send him?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:38, Reply)
I gave him genuine reccomendations
Fuck knows where he went to the pub, his 'hotel' was miles away from the city centre
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:40, Reply)
I like staying central and having a nice walk round the wall in Summer.
I reckon he got some abuse off the locals.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:41, Reply)
yer I stay near enough to the centre and like sitting in the lamb & lion beer garden in the summer
He prolly went to a shit tourist pub like Olde Starre Inn or Kings Arms.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:43, Reply)
was the weather shit?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:39, Reply)
no, he just went to a pub with 'wankers' in it or sutin

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:40, Reply)
Your local?
Hahahahahahaha.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:41, Reply)
nah, my local is alright.
Plus, Holgate ent on the tourist trail, unless you're a windmill enthusiast.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:42, Reply)
There's too many Sam Smith's pubs.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:43, Reply)
in York? um, the Burns Hotel is in the centre, what other ones are there?

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:44, Reply)
The Hansom Cab

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:46, Reply)
...now renamed the Burns Hotel.
Prick.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:48, Reply)
How do you non-driving pricks cope?
I've been without a car for over three weeks now and I'm going out of my God-damned mind.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:49, Reply)
I vent my rage by being an internet forum wanker

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:49, Reply)
I just deal with public transport, plenty of peasant wagons round mine.
I do like to silently vent when they are filled with students but that's the price I pay for where I live.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:52, Reply)
I don't mind public transport, but it's only because I don't have to rely on it.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:54, Reply)
So what are your main gripes then?
Just not having a car?
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 12:58, Reply)
Yep.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:06, Reply)
typical frog, always complaining

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:08, Reply)
The joy that is adding an hour onto my commute to allow for four buses each leaving anything up to quarter of an hour early.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:07, Reply)
Anyone for a Putin butt plug?
www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/political-sculptor-creates-novelty-sex-toy-that-allows-you-to-stick-it-to-vladimir-putin-9181356.html
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:10, Reply)
How does a plane full of people just disappear?
and, will moving a fuckload of music off my laptop increase its performance speed?
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:14, Reply)
No
Is it running slowly all the time?
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:15, Reply)
Nah not really, just sometimes.
I've done a virus check and it appears to be clean.
Ah well, Im moving it all to an external thingy anyway.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:31, Reply)
it would only affect it if you had more than abou 95% of the drive full
In addition to the below once you have moved everything do a full defrag and file clean
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:45, Reply)
No, it's all the spyware and so on you downloaded
along with your violently offensive grot, you disgusting deviant.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:25, Reply)
They all escaped through the exits here, here and here.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:25, Reply)
check your background programmes
see if any are running without being "open"
download Superantispyware and run full system scan, it will find loads from all the deviant porn your lot like to watch.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:44, Reply)
this^

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:45, Reply)
See how quickly he has said thanks to all the helpful advice
I tell you sporters those Navigators of the Windward Passage are an ungrateful lot
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:53, Reply)
You are on fire with puns today!

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:54, Reply)
THANKS!!!
High maintainence prick
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:55, Reply)
you're welcome

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 14:00, Reply)
Don't tend to download porn but I guess there could be summat on there.
This gets rid of any viruses too?
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:54, Reply)
It is mainly for spyware rather than viruses
Same thing in essence but its the sort of thing that fires pop up etc. Your virus software will deal with them.

If you need a good free one try Avast, AVG was quite heavy usage when I last looked.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:57, Reply)
Ive got avast :)
uSED TO USE avg BUT IT STARTED DEMANDING RESTARTS ALL THE TIME.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 14:02, Reply)
a vast gut more like

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 14:03, Reply)
You music will not be making your computer run slowly.
HTH
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:18, Reply)
HIS music would make Usain Bolt run slowly.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:27, Reply)
Nakers advises this will help your computer run faster
www.chord.co.uk/mobile/product.php?product=chord-sarum-ethernet-tuned-aray
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:24, Reply)
Ew. Who does Ethernet these days. Wireless baby, all the way.

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:32, Reply)
Anyone who needs decent bandwidth
People who use wireless for non-mobile devices and then moan about low speed and high latency are stupid.
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:38, Reply)
Dozers bird is becoming a psychologist.
www.theguardian.com/society/2014/mar/08/sian-williams-bbc-host-trauma-psychologist
(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:34, Reply)
she's gorgeous

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 14:00, Reply)
NEW (not very good) THREAD

(, Mon 10 Mar 2014, 13:54, Reply)

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