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	Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW?  Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
	
	(
 rob
 rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
 
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	 School reports
	School reports
 	After a filling at the dentists I have to go to my daughter's school for her parent's evening.
What were you told in school?  Were you never going to amount to much?
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:38,
	
120 replies,
	
latest was 12 years ago)
 
	 I was alright at school. Middle of the road.
	I was alright at school. Middle of the road.
 	I sort of flitted between groups of people. was definitely more of a chav. Did the whole drinking on the streets thing.
Hell, we even drank before assembly sometimes.
Ahh... Council.
	(
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:45,
	
Reply)
 
	 Where were you from in Newcastle again?
	Where were you from in Newcastle again?
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:46,
	
Reply)
 
	 behind teh bins
	behind teh bins
 	pizza hut 
bigg market
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:00,
	
Reply)
 
	 There actually is a Pizza Hut at the top of the Bigg Market
	There actually is a Pizza Hut at the top of the Bigg Market
 	Although I'm not sure how to access the bins
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:01,
	
Reply)
 
	 Grew up in Fawdon, moved to City Centre, then Benwell.
	Grew up in Fawdon, moved to City Centre, then Benwell.
 	Classy lass
	(
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:02,
	
Reply)
 
	 Nothing says class like Benwell
	Nothing says class like Benwell
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:02,
	
Reply)
 
	 It was near the river though, in a nice bit.
	It was near the river though, in a nice bit.
 	
	(
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:06,
	
Reply)
 
	 I've not seen that "bit"
	I've not seen that "bit"
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:08,
	
Reply)
 
	 "Whilst AA is clearly full of ideas, we wish he wouldn't share them quite so readily"
	"Whilst AA is clearly full of ideas, we wish he wouldn't share them quite so readily"
 	i.e. Shut the fuck up you little shit.
	(
 Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora
 Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:47,
	
Reply)
 
	 i.e. Gobshite
	i.e. Gobshite
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:48,
	
Reply)
 
	 One of my favourite Northern terms
	One of my favourite Northern terms
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:48,
	
Reply)
 
	 I learned it as an Irish term
	I learned it as an Irish term
 	Interestingly*, the Dictionary of Slang gives an alternative definition of "market trader"
*Interest may go down as well as up
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:05,
	
Reply)
 
	 It just sounds really offensive with a Northern accent
	It just sounds really offensive with a Northern accent
 	as does everything, etc...
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:06,
	
Reply)
 
	 Can you edit a mod edited post?
	Can you edit a mod edited post?
 	Could tangled sneak back and change his post back to what it was without shitmod noticing?
	(
 Peej
 Peej, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:51,
	
Reply)
 
	 Probably, yes
	Probably, yes
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:51,
	
Reply)
 
	 No problem mate
 	5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post2253124
	No problem mate
 	5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post2253124
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:03,
	
Reply)
 
	 lol
	lol
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:04,
	
Reply)
 
	 I should probably edit that out again
	I should probably edit that out again
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:15,
	
Reply)
 
	 Might be a good idea
	Might be a good idea
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:15,
	
Reply)
 
	 I was told I would most likely get a job that allowed me to be paid for sitting on a puerile digital arts community's Off Topic board.
	I was told I would most likely get a job that allowed me to be paid for sitting on a puerile digital arts community's Off Topic board. 
 	
	(
 Peej
 Peej, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:53,
	
Reply)
 
	 I was taught the importance of good oral hygiene.
	I was taught the importance of good oral hygiene. 
 	
	(
 Muns
 Muns, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:53,
	
Reply)
 
	 Me too
	Me too
 	but I chipped a tooth
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:55,
	
Reply)
 
	 Teacher had a Prince Albert, did he?
	Teacher had a Prince Albert, did he?
 	
	(
 The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner
 The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:58,
	
Reply)
 
	 Not any more
	Not any more
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:59,
	
Reply)
 
	 I gave YM a dose of oral hygiene last night
	I gave YM a dose of oral hygiene last night
 	
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:58,
	
Reply)
 
	 YM gave me unhygienic oral last night.
	YM gave me unhygienic oral last night.  
 	
	(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:59,
	
Reply)
 
	 Yeah that one works better
	Yeah that one works better
 	
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:00,
	
Reply)
 
	 xx
	xx
 	
	(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:01,
	
Reply)
 
	 So you know in school if you die you get a full page in the yearbook.
	So you know in school if you die you get a full page in the yearbook.
 	Well so many kids in my year died that they took up most of the book.
	(
 Peej
 Peej, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:58,
	
Reply)
 
	 But they never caught you, eh?
	But they never caught you, eh?
 	
	(
 The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner
 The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:59,
	
Reply)
 
	 They must have left you with a Colum(bine) though
	They must have left you with a Colum(bine) though
 	
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 14:59,
	
Reply)
 
	 Someone in my year was murdered by Sunderland's very own gay serial killer
	Someone in my year was murdered by Sunderland's very own gay serial killer
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:00,
	
Reply)
 
	 Beat them to death with a box of Weetabix.
	Beat them to death with a box of Weetabix.
 	He was also a bad speller.
	(
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:07,
	
Reply)
 
	 That took me far too long to work out
	That took me far too long to work out
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:07,
	
Reply)
 
	 steven grieveson?
	steven grieveson?
 	
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:22,
	
Reply)
 
	 Thats our murderer, yes
	Thats our murderer, yes
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:23,
	
Reply)
 
	 A mate's cousin spent 6 months locked up as he and his bird were fucking in a house that he killed one of the boys in
	A mate's cousin spent 6 months locked up as he and his bird were fucking in a house that he killed one of the boys in
 	He left a bloody fingerprint there and his lass wouldn't fess up to being there with him
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:25,
	
Reply)
 
	 Well he shouldnt have gone for the ol stink finger
	Well he shouldnt have gone for the ol stink finger 
 	if she was blobbing
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:26,
	
Reply)
 
	 tggi^
	tggi^
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:26,
	
Reply)
 
	 Ah now, thy found Jason not guilty.
	Ah now, thy found Jason not guilty.
 	
	(
 Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U
 Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 17:51,
	
Reply)
 
	 Yearbook?  WTF?
	Yearbook?  WTF?  
 	Like in America?  
Did you all write gay farewells to each other?
	(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:03,
	
Reply)
 
	 In spunk
	In spunk
 	on his back
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:05,
	
Reply)
 
	 Hahahahahaha.
	Hahahahahaha.  
 	After a few Ziders.
	(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:11,
	
Reply)
 
	 No, most school I have worked in have had a yearbook with photos of all their year in as a keepsake.
	No, most school I have worked in have had a yearbook with photos of all their year in as a keepsake.
 	Its surely not that unusual. I got mine 16 years ago.
	(
 Peej
 Peej, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:40,
	
Reply)
 
	 I was told to leave and never return.
	I was told to leave and never return. 
 	I was expelled when I was 13.
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:02,
	
Reply)
 
	 Expelled as a miner then?
	Expelled as a miner then?
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:05,
	
Reply)
 
	 No wonder your folks used to beat you up
	No wonder your folks used to beat you up
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:05,
	
Reply)
 
	 I am seeing my parents in a few days time.
	I am seeing my parents in a few days time. 
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:06,
	
Reply)
 
	 Its off to home you go
	Its off to home you go
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:07,
	
Reply)
 
	 They've sold the family place. Never seen the current one.
	They've sold the family place. Never seen the current one. 
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:10,
	
Reply)
 
	 Don't bang your head on the table when you walk in.
	Don't bang your head on the table when you walk in.  
 	
	(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:12,
	
Reply)
 
	 haha!
	haha!
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:12,
	
Reply)
 
	 My final R.E. report stated that I have a warped and perverse sense of humour.
	My final R.E. report stated that I have a warped and perverse sense of humour. 
 	The teacher had taken offence to me drawing a picture of Jesus holding a blood soaked chainsaw, with the words 'suck this' written on his robes, also in blood. 
I had issues with religion as a child.
	(
 Muns
 Muns, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:08,
	
Reply)
 
	 I like this
	I like this
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:09,
	
Reply)
 
	 They made RE so boring!
	They made RE so boring!
 	If they included all the genocide I may have listened.
	(
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:17,
	
Reply)
 
	 
	
 	listened produced testosterone.
	(
 Muns
 Muns, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:19,
	
Reply)
 
	 You want testosterone?
	You want testosterone?
 	I may be queer but I'd still knock you into next week.
GRRRRR!
	(
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:24,
	
Reply)
 
	 
	 
 	knock bum
	(
 Muns
 Muns, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:25,
	
Reply)
 
	 Isn't baldness linked to high testosterone levels?
	Isn't baldness linked to high testosterone levels?
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:48,
	
Reply)
 
	 No, due to hair falling out.
	No, due to hair falling out.
 	
	(
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 16:04,
	
Reply)
 
	 Mrs Cow works in a Catholic school
	Mrs Cow works in a Catholic school
 	They have all the prayers, etc.
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:19,
	
Reply)
 
	 Our church is so boring.
	Our church is so boring.
 	Hymns. No.
	(
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf
 GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:25,
	
Reply)
 
	 So does Mrs Hats!
 	SPOOKY DOOKY!
	So does Mrs Hats!
 	SPOOKY DOOKY!
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 17:08,
	
Reply)
 
	 I was consistently told from early school reports right up to the end that I was doing well but was a lazy shite who could and should do even better.
	I was consistently told from early school reports right up to the end that I was doing well but was a lazy shite who could and should do even better.
 	I'm not convinced this was a great lesson as I have continued to do alright and am still pretty lazy.
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:20,
	
Reply)
 
	 Thats pretty much the same as me
	Thats pretty much the same as me
 	Apart from Biology which simply said 
***** has no interest in this subject
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:23,
	
Reply)
 
	 Alright *****
	Alright *****
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:25,
	
Reply)
 
	 five star are fucking shit
	five star are fucking shit
 	
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:27,
	
Reply)
 
	 Alright Eliot
	Alright Eliot
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:28,
	
Reply)
 
	 *phones home*
	*phones home*
 	
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:30,
	
Reply)
 
	 blah blah blah
	blah blah blah
 	
	(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:24,
	
Reply)
 
	 I got expelled.
	I got expelled.
 	I was told once "What you are doing is desperately trying to prove to the world that you are a grown up. When you finally are a grown up (which might well never happen), you will know it, and no longer feel the need to try to prove it to anyone."
	(
 Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob
 Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:31,
	
Reply)
 
	 still not had chance to test that theory, huh?
	still not had chance to test that theory, huh?
 	
	(
katie hopkins telling it where its at, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:33,
	
Reply)
 
	 Absolutely not - as evinced by my going on b3ta.
	Absolutely not - as evinced by my going on b3ta.
 	
	(
 Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob
 Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:34,
	
Reply)
 
	 at what age are we supposed to be grown up
	at what age are we supposed to be grown up
 	I think I passed it by accident
	(
 Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity
 Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 16:36,
	
Reply)
 
	 I won the Stan Spencer Award for music.
	I won the Stan Spencer Award for music.
 	
	(
 Peej
 Peej, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:33,
	
Reply)
 
	 
	 
 	stan frank
	(
katie hopkins telling it where its at, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:34,
	
Reply)
 
	 
	 
 	spencer skinner
	(
 Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob
 Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:40,
	
Reply)
 
	 
	 
 	 frank  Dennis
	(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:40,
	
Reply)
 
	 
	 
 	skinner Bin lorries
	(
 Muns
 Muns, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 15:42,
	
Reply)
 
	 
	 
 	orries aden
	(
katie hopkins telling it where its at, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 16:05,
	
Reply)
 
	 I can't believe that he'd accept an award with that cunts name on it.
	I can't believe that he'd accept an award with that cunts name on it. 
 	He disgusts me.
	(
 Muns
 Muns, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 16:08,
	
Reply)
 
	 i always had a good report, apparently I was a pleasure to teach.
	i always had a good report, apparently I was a pleasure to teach.
 	Well, except for PE where I complained about a PE teacher on a local radio 'comedy' show.
	(
 Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity
 Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 16:36,
	
Reply)
 
	 In my careers advice meeting my results came out as "mutha fuckin hustla"
	In my careers advice meeting my results came out as "mutha fuckin hustla"
 	
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 2 Apr 2014, 17:02,
	
Reply)
 
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