bruiser
Do not attempt to climb over an 8 feet high corrugrated iron fence in a pair of Converse and a shortish dress. That way lies purple thighs:



(I got over the fence though. But I can't sit with my legs crossed now. Not that I spend much time with my legs together, let's face it.)
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 12:58, 34 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

FFS
Ouch!
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:08, Reply)

aye
the fence was sharp at the top and I had to put my weight on it to swing over. One wrong move and there would've been mimsy-slicing.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:10, Reply)

I imagine you were taking a shortcut
Was it really worth it?! That looks horribly painful.
( Captain V, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:15, Reply)

Ouch
Oh dear lord woman, mimsy-slicing?

You escaped lightly (not that I'm belittling that horrific looking bruise).
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:17, Reply)

@Captain V
Shortcut... fishing... maybe a little trespassing...
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:20, Reply)

That looks nasty
Just as well you didn't cut it open. Imagine the raft of 'gash' jokes that would have precipitated.

Maybe we should have a b3ta bruise challenge, to see if anyone can get one to look like a CDC. You've got the colour right there, CHCB, but the shape's a bit wrong.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:26, Reply)

Oooooww
That's painfully impressive. I wish we'd got a photo of Tourette's knee after she gashed it open taking a short cut home through the cemetary a couple of Christmases ago. It looked like a fishes gob...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:28, Reply)

Ow
Owowowowowowowowow.

My gods that looks nasty.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:29, Reply)

Am I the only one that finds this
Vaguely arousing?
( Cawl, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:31, Reply)

@Kaol
heh, heh. No. :)
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:32, Reply)

Hahaha!
*grins*

*pokes bruise*
( Cawl, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:37, Reply)

lol
I did that a couplwe of months ago. forgot the code to my apartment security gates. got stuck at the top for about 15 minutes though, when i kind of impaled the back of my knee to one of the spikes. Had to get a random passwer by to unhook me, where i promptly fell about 8 feet down ovewr the other side. Still at least i gotr into the apartment complex :)
(weekirst23 Is broken! Silly ice. Silly High heels!, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:39, Reply)

You go fishing in short skirts?
CHCB.....you rock!
( girlinthehole, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:45, Reply)

Ouch!
This looks really very sore. But a good tale from getting it! ;)
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:50, Reply)

@BGB
Fishing... cavorting on river banks... I hadn't intended to go fishing, it was spur of the moment thing, and I was still wearing clothes from the night before. We didn't catch anything though. Well, not fish.

@weekirst - lucky someone came along to unhook you! You could've been stuck there all night.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:53, Reply)

Is that
the inside or outside of your thigh? I'm trying to picture how you did this.

(Bruises on the arse, on the other hand, can be quite sexy. Especially if they're the shape of a hand.)
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:53, Reply)

^
or belt-shaped.

Inner thigh, btw.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:54, Reply)

ooh nasty
Although it is going to look worse when it goes through the "green phase" :p
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:55, Reply)

^
I think I'll take photos every day and do a time-lapse animated gif of the colour change
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:56, Reply)

How 'bout a riding crop?

( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 9 Sep 2008, 13:58, Reply)

^
sure. But those outfits do nothing for me.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:00, Reply)

I'm not with you there CHCB
The red hat really gets me going.
( Captain V, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:01, Reply)

How 'bout this then?

( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:02, Reply)

^THAT WOMAN HAS NO NIPPLES
and I find that disturbing.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:05, Reply)

If you squint a little
it's got kind of a 3d effect.

Looks painful though *sympathy ouches*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:09, Reply)

But not as disturbing as this!

( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:09, Reply)

I am stunned
that no honest and kindly gentleman on here has offered to kiss it better yet.

contemplates

..

offers

and flees before raahed at by chcb
(Halfy By light alone, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:48, Reply)

Aw, ta
but it's okay, I had it kissed better shortly after it happened, which is how I ended up with muddy knees as well.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:53, Reply)

thats ok then
It does look like you are trying to hide Gorbachov under your skirt though heheheee



sorry
(Halfy By light alone, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 15:24, Reply)

Ow, fuck!
That looks painful!
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 19:29, Reply)

Christ woman
that looks sore.

Get some arnica cream on it pronto!
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 20:23, Reply)

*sympathises*
That looks nasty.

I tried to do something similar once on my way back from fetching lunch - hopping over a 5ft wall carrying a jacket potato with cheese and beans. In my defence, I was taking a short-cut as it was raining.

Unsurprisingly, I ended up in a wet, undignified heap on the floor, and then had to walk through the main college building to my car to go home and get changed, nursing a dislocated finger, dripping blood from my hand and bean juice from my hair.
( le brian, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 20:33, Reply)

Every time I come to Off Topic
I see CHCB's bruised thigh and find myself getting oddly aroused...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 9 Sep 2008, 21:33, Reply)

@Kaol & CHCB & TRL:
If you find that sort of thing arousing, I suggest you take up a martial art ASAP. When we're down the pub for post-session drinks, we often compare bruises.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 23:04, Reply)