meaty

( $$ ✅, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 7:10, 154 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

breakfast japes
ask the kids what kind of apple juice they want so that they hop around the room shouting "I want cox! I want cox!"
(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 7:38, Reply)

doktor avalanche

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:00, Reply)

dosso

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:15, Reply)

dubble ess

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 7:59, Reply)

el dozo!

( $$ ✅, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:21, Reply)

alright mi nigga

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:31, Reply)

First day at new job today!
Wish me luck Internet chums
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:22, Reply)

try not to puke on your boss!

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:29, Reply)

Good luck pal

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:30, Reply)

good luck

( $$ ✅, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:31, Reply)

Good luck internet lad

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:32, Reply)

try not to get gay spunk on your boss's lapel

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:38, Reply)

Good luck!
May HR send you many emails
( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:47, Reply)

Good luck
hope you're further than 30m from the nearest network socket
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 8:52, Reply)

remember it's only handjobs for directors
save the blowies for the board.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:38, Reply)

what's happened to painfully unfunny hipster tosser A Vagabond?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:03, Reply)

caught his moustaches in the spokes of his fixie and fell under the wheels of a vw camper

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:04, Reply)

oh I do hope so.
Most fervently.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:06, Reply)

What a load of fucking shit
www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-29791820

Thats right fucked me off that has! Ruined my day in fact.
( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:07, Reply)

Why? Seems a bit of a strange reaction to yet another "what's your favourite..?" pointless popular vote.

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:08, Reply)

"The death of Tiffany was voted the public's favourite Eastenders episode ever. That's made me so CROSS"

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:09, Reply)

I can actually see you getting your RAGE on at Eastenders

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:11, Reply)

I do, frequently.
Though more due to its continuing existence, rather than any preference as to episodes.
( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:12, Reply)

I like to annoy Mrs Cow by asking loads of questions all the way through it

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:13, Reply)

Frankly, it doesn't take any great leap of deductive reasoning to see me getting my rage on at something.
I'm pretty much the yang to the Dalai Lama's ying.
( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:15, Reply)

My calmness continues
I still dont know why
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:22, Reply)

Brain tumour. Soz.

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:26, Reply)

Thats fine

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:27, Reply)

I did that last night during Coronation Street unfortunately she thought I was interested so she told me all the answers.

( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:15, Reply)

I'm not sure she's the loser in this scenario.

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:16, Reply)

Small victories

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:22, Reply)

Pssst, perhaps Kroners old buddy, I'm not actually as fucked off as the tone of my post suggests
( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:12, Reply)

Nonsense.

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:13, Reply)

Alright I'm fucking livid! I'm going to seek out and kill every single one of these tasteless pricks
Its like Jaysom just sat there clicking over and over again.
( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:14, Reply)

it's almost as if these things are subjective and skewed by the kind of people who bother voting in these daft polls
I mean ... clearly it's either Grace Jones version of Warm Leatherette or Ray Charles's Eleanor Rugby.
(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:11, Reply)

Bullshit
Joe McElderry isn't even in the top ten
( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:13, Reply)

I once saw him in Subway in Newcastle frantically trying to be noticed

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:14, Reply)

I once saw Brian from Big Brother shouting down his phone about hitting a kid with a belt.
Fucking prick
( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:16, Reply)

How did you recognise him?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:16, Reply)

I'm gay

( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:19, Reply)

That would explain why your wife hates you

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:21, Reply)

Shouldn't you be at your new job?

( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:22, Reply)

I got fired already

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:24, Reply)

Were you working in Noo Yoik?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:26, Reply)

We do have interests in America, but no

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:27, Reply)

fuggedaboudid

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:27, Reply)

Did he Belo?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:17, Reply)

Cancer bats - sabotage ftw

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:16, Reply)

that Pete Murphy and Trent Reznor cover of Warm Leatherette is tremendous

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:25, Reply)

^homophobe

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:13, Reply)

Yesssssss! My vote counted for once

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:25, Reply)

Stranglers ftw

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:40, Reply)

Morning chums
It appears that the weather has forgotten it is October. Its been blimmen' lovely up here for ages now
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:12, Reply)

8 of the top ten fattest places in the uk are in the northeast

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:15, Reply)

The last two are South London, including Lewisham.
What I am taking from this is that Stunned is acting as a counterweight to stop Scotland from sinking into the North Sea.
( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:16, Reply)

But having piled on a few metric fuck tonnes too many the authorities has to lol off his fat foot and send it to Macclesfield

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:18, Reply)

He's legally banned from travelling North of Luton in case he knocks the Earth off its axis.

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:21, Reply)

That and him being a Cockerney cunt

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:22, Reply)

He ent cockerney, he's eastern.

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:30, Reply)

South of Hull = Cockney

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:31, Reply)

By that token, I'm a Cockney.
My mother will be so disappointed.
( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:35, Reply)

No more than she is already

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:36, Reply)

Your point being?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:21, Reply)

Try having a salad with your fried fat sandwiches.

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:22, Reply)

I'm currently eating a peanut butter and banana toast sarnie
It looks like cat shit but tastes amazing
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:23, Reply)

^aiming for a dignified Elvis death^

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:27, Reply)

Just nipping for a shite

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:28, Reply)

I was well pleased to hear the weather forecast this morning.
That lass on the BBC who says Englind Irelind and Scotlind said "Its going to be fucking lovely everywhere except cornwall thats going to be a wet foggy mess"

What a load of fucking shit

Its right fucked me off that has! Ruined my day in fact.
( Peej, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:18, Reply)

She annoys the tits off me

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:20, Reply)

Scutlind

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:21, Reply)

She has a stupid face and stupid voice

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:25, Reply)

Her breasts are magnificent

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:27, Reply)

I bet when unleased they mop the floor

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:32, Reply)

Every time somebody mentions the BBC news
I start thinking about Wendy Hurrell and go off into a daydream.
( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:25, Reply)

Hey kroney, I need a new rear view mirror any suggestions where to get one

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:28, Reply)

Warren Evans.

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:29, Reply)

Wow, they've diversifed

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:31, Reply)

Difficult economic climate.
As a plus, it'll come with a nice wooden frame.
( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:39, Reply)

Thanks for your help at this difficult time

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:48, Reply)

just buy a new car
i might get one of these next:

www.audi.co.uk/content/audi/new-cars/a3/a3-cabriolet.html/
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:45, Reply)

They are nice, it must be said

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:46, Reply)

i remember seeing clarkson reviewing them when they first came out
he said, it's great, really fast, nice to drive - but - you NEED to leap out and announce to everyone, "I'M NOT GAY!"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:48, Reply)

^gay^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:49, Reply)

also cf "all the cunts have moved out of BMWs and bought Audis"

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:54, Reply)

I'm a retro cunt

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:00, Reply)

I do fancy an Audi but I do worry about this
Do they send them all off on a 'how to drive like a cunt' course before they get the keys?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:05, Reply)

no, it comes naturally to anyone who desires an Audi
the ultimate cunts car is the Q8, being both an Audi and a shit oversized school run 4x4, narrowly beating the laughable BMW X6 into second place.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:10, Reply)

The X6 is a fucking joke
A massive car but not big enough in the back for anyone taller than about 5'.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:16, Reply)

the new miniature range rover is the same
what is the point of a range rover if there isn't room to fuck an animal in the back?
(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:21, Reply)

just open the boot and do it al fresco
god, do lawyers have to think of EVERYTHING for you?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:24, Reply)

only pikeys fuck pigs outdoors

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:25, Reply)

It's very sad. Audis used to be a classy alternative.

( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:16, Reply)

did they?
my boss has an s8 which makes him a massive cunt but he still has his old 80s quattro

There have always been pricks in audis.
(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:24, Reply)

Yep. They've always had brutish great sports models.
but the saloons were always seen as being less vulgar than BMWs.
( Kroney, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:26, Reply)

spose
Almost all cars are cheap as fuck now though. That's probably more to do with it.
(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:28, Reply)

they're all men, so i wouldn't qualify, but you might just
needless to say, if you want to see a woman drive like a cunt, go and look for a tricky right turn or see someone holding up an entire street of traffic because they can't parallel park. a twat hooning around the motorway like a nob will always be a man, and a twat dithering around like a gladys will always be a woman.

one of the very few areas in life where the gender difference is actually a fact.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:19, Reply)

Not interested in those soz

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:49, Reply)

oh god i forgot you have shitty neon legwarmer taste in cars

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:53, Reply)

whoa now ... you leave the neon leg warmers alone
I can't dance in just my pumps and leotard.
(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:04, Reply)

genesis had some work to do on their lyrics

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:20, Reply)

we're all daydreaming about Phil Collins in a leotard now
Thanks.
(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:22, Reply)

like you weren't already

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:24, Reply)

I'm only human.

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:28, Reply)

Wankers' car
Yeah you should get one.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:07, Reply)

we don't all want to drive co-operative-owned horse and carts

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 10:20, Reply)

snakey

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 28 Oct 2014, 9:46, Reply)