Weekend plans
This weekend I appear to be repairing the fence. Hail, hurricanes and snow apart, I'll be out for the first run of the year now I seem to have recovered from t'lurgy. Got three races booked in already so my 40th year will be fitness based

On the negative side, the first overtime of the year this weekend for some kind of cockney bellend who works round the corner from McBeef's old place

Alt:
Worst hangover cure
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:20, 153 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

The only crime that bites
www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-30743371
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:25, Reply)

I did not see this on the official 808 state facebook page.
Ex:El and 808 Ninety are great albums though.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:47, Reply)

people approaching a decade birthday are considerably more likely to have a heart attack or summat

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:33, Reply)

So does that mean I am safe now seeing as I have passed the decade one?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:34, Reply)

dunno
It was newspaper pseudo science twaddle about people taking up riskier hobbies when approaching a big birthday
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:36, Reply)

PHEW!
I took it up a few years ago so I'm safe
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:37, Reply)

imma take up base jumping and smack when I'm eighty

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:46, Reply)

next year you mean lololold

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:46, Reply)

facts

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:34, Reply)

hunt

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:38, Reply)

meh

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:35, Reply)

what is it that you do sporto?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:34, Reply)

IT shit
*works it IT*

Got some database wizardry to perform for a customer this weekend
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:35, Reply)

THRILLING ENDEAVOURS

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:37, Reply)

I'll be reducing a 95GB database to 45GB!
GET ME!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:37, Reply)

Holy fuckoly ... that sounds almost as exciting as plumbing regulations

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:43, Reply)

you think that's exciting?
I'm actually plumbing.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:55, Reply)

yeah ... but you prolly get to wear a manly tool belt and nip out to screwfix for parts

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:29, Reply)

And I'm spent.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:44, Reply)

In the amount he's paying you he could just buy more storage and say 'fuck it'.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:46, Reply)

11 pence is pretty cheap for 50gigs of storage

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:48, Reply)

The problem is they have runaway processes so by next month it'll be about 120GB

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:52, Reply)

It sounds like you're curing the symptoms and not the cause.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:02, Reply)

No, this will be doing both
Terminating rogue looping processes, dump and reload to reclaim space
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:03, Reply)

I dumped my reload in YM or saink.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:23, Reply)

is weekend work common for you in IT then?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:54, Reply)

Yeah, all the time
Customers don't want any downtime on their systems during the week
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:56, Reply)

what cunts
Poo in a drawer in the archives room.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:11, Reply)

I'll be working from home so I'll do it there

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:15, Reply)

CPS winders
He is on here spying on bad dads YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:35, Reply)

SHUT THE FUCK UP!
You'll ruin my cover
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:35, Reply)

Soz
I meant he works in IT
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:36, Reply)

The DA will have your fucking badge for this

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:37, Reply)

By which I mean, 0101101010

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:38, Reply)

001100010010011110100001101101110011
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:40, Reply)

lol

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:46, Reply)

101

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:52, Reply)

I'm taking the sprog to a birthday party and looking at kitchens
Alt. Worst? Well I imagine smacking yourself over the head with a cast iron skillet would be a pretty bad cure.
( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:50, Reply)

Got the builder coming round this weekend to finalise extension plans
That'll mean I can order my new kitchen!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:53, Reply)

I don't want a new kitchen
but I am fed up with the sink not being under the window. So we are taking new carcasses, plumbing and sink. It just got to the point where its easier to just get the lot done
( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:55, Reply)

This is a full new one
Getting a 4.5m long wall of cupboards, 100cm range cooker and a 2.4m island with integrated sink. American fridge/freezer being set into another wall and surrounded by cupboards.

5m of bifold doors out into the garden \o/
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:57, Reply)

Yeh we're going full new now
Not getting a range through, considered it but really don't see the point I cooked for 10 people in my dual fuel double oven with 4 burners and I don't expect to be cooking for more. We had an american fridge freezer. It was a cunt. No-one would repair it when it broke, "Sorry mate we don't do American" in the end we gave it away and got a Smeg.
( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:00, Reply)

you smegging smegger.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:01, Reply)

I love Star Wars!

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:05, Reply)

Its terrible that you pick a favourite child

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:08, Reply)

Click!

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:17, Reply)

I want more than 4 burners
I had a 6 burner Smeg in the old place and I miss it. I like having two ovens
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:01, Reply)

Two ovens makes a massive difference.

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:03, Reply)

This is correct
I thought about getting two built in ones with a 6 burner hob but a range is easier to sort
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:04, Reply)

I thought you only ate raw carrots, Worzel?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:58, Reply)

Thats a turnip for the books

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:58, Reply)

Swedon't like it when we're insulted like that

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:04, Reply)

(par)snip it

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:05, Reply)

Listen mate, I'm getting pea'd off here

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:07, Reply)

(sav)oy!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:08, Reply)

I thought I was going to see Stuart Lee tonight but that is next Friday. BALLS!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:56, Reply)

Hi Stunned Poster!

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:57, Reply)

Coooeee!
*waves*
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 11:58, Reply)

I like Stewart Lee
My Brother in Law is a Jock and hates him. LOLZ!
( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:08, Reply)

is he a scottish paedophile.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:15, Reply)

the very worst type of paedophile

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:16, Reply)

coming at you, across a bothy.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:18, Reply)

He's not coming to Aberdeen for this show, so I may have to go to Dundee to see it.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:08, Reply)

I am unsure how to respond to this.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:19, Reply)

Alt: rotting flesh

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:06, Reply)

41st, isn't it?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:11, Reply)

Way to spoil my day

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:15, Reply)

this weekend im going to lounge about and wear my sexy burgundy tracksuit bottoms and eat beef burgers

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:12, Reply)

no you're not

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:14, Reply)

i am on sunday

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:15, Reply)

You have to chill not lounge on a Sunday

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:16, Reply)

i dont play by the rules

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:17, Reply)

you laugh in the face of convention
and tweak the nipples of the establishment
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:21, Reply)

looks like we might be going shopping on sunday...
.... although i did just get this cracking reply from one:

"not this sunday, i'll be out flying my hawk."
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:28, Reply)

Wowsers lucky snakey

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:28, Reply)

not boring shoe shopping or jumper shopping
that's his domain. this is EXCITING shopping.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:29, Reply)

shopping is only exciting if you spend your days doing something incredibly dull and oh right never mind

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:32, Reply)

i could be into grave rubbing and stamp collecting
i'd still be more fun than a half-dead deadbeat dad who can't even brush his kids' skanky hair
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:36, Reply)

alright Fairholme

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:37, Reply)

i don't know who posted the pics
i just remember thinking, blimey, haven't you heard of a comb?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:38, Reply)

nobody posted any pics, fatlass

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:40, Reply)

course not greybeard

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:42, Reply)

is this what keeps toyboy in your granny flat?
a shared creepy obsession with other people's kids?
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:44, Reply)

yeah.....
i don't think you need to worry. even jim wouldn't have fixed that.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:48, Reply)

^posted pictures of a strangers children after stalking and Internet hardmanning

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:05, Reply)

hooray! creepy junior is here to share his surrogate granny's paedo fantasies

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:18, Reply)

weeeell
as we're both younger than you when your neglected looking kids were born, what does that make you?

apart from a probable cuckold?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:47, Reply)

you'll do what Granny Grumps tells you, young man

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:31, Reply)

She's a serious Granny.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:34, Reply)

hang about...
look out...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:36, Reply)

She'll do things that you never saw your Granny do
Is there nothing that she cannae do?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:40, Reply)

she can lol at dr deletion like the rest of us

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:43, Reply)

who's been deleting?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:46, Reply)

I replied to the wrong post
this is very exciting for very dull people
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:47, Reply)

someone didn't get the supergran reference and didn't like having his idiocy pointed out
someone who THINKS B3TA IS SRS BZNESS
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:47, Reply)

bit harsh now I think about it
my grannies were both quite interesting
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:41, Reply)

both quite interesting sisters
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:44, Reply)

They can be nuns and be interesting.

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:49, Reply)

like robbie coltrane

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:50, Reply)

Not really
He's a fat jock up himself cunt
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:06, Reply)

nuns on the run was ok if you were 10
but wasn't there a terrible sort of follow-up, the pope must die?

the pope must diet, more like
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:07, Reply)

have some cheap European lager with that

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:29, Reply)

birthday this weekend innit
Got various things lined up eh.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:38, Reply)

slouching in your pants singing songs to yourself and then eating a Barbie birthday cake for twelve in one sitting

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:39, Reply)

... again.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:47, Reply)

actually, this sounds alright.
I might do this.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:04, Reply)

who isn't meeting you for a drink?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:40, Reply)

Me

( Kroney, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:42, Reply)

Me

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:43, Reply)

Me.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:47, Reply)

me four

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:48, Reply)

+toes off a full set

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:49, Reply)

Me!

( Peej, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:49, Reply)

And me!

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:51, Reply)

I have a bottle of hibiki 12, I'll just tan that by lunchtime

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:53, Reply)

Ah a traditional Scottish celebration

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:06, Reply)

aye

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:07, Reply)

I'm definitely not.

(dozer's mommy likes big dick, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:57, Reply)

depends
is he wearing that shit sweatshirt and shit nosering again?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:58, Reply)

I'll be wearing my BAPE camo hoodie, carhartt jeans, trainers by Fallen and prolly smelling of Givenchy Gentleman

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 12:59, Reply)

you BAPE RABIES!!!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:01, Reply)

haha the 'suga' is in tiny letters!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:01, Reply)

Givenchy destitute
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:03, Reply)

I think you should stop worrying so much about labels,
And just get quality fabrics.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:03, Reply)

Don't look, feeeeel the quality.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:04, Reply)

many labels equate to good quality

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:04, Reply)

this is why you're a cunt.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:05, Reply)

oh come on windy, be fair
it's far from the only reason
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:07, Reply)

I occasionally start to think dozer is alright,
And then this sort of thing happens.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:24, Reply)

i dunno, compare the fabric and the cut of jeans by George at Asda to a pair of Carhartt.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:08, Reply)

one of my favourite ever pairs of jeans were bootcuts by Cherokee, from Tesco
Great quality but cheap jeans.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:09, Reply)

chea jee
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:20, Reply)

no one said that your only options are George or Carharrt

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:23, Reply)

Yeah I mean he forgot Matalan

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 9 Jan 2015, 13:29, Reply)