I need cheering up.
Remind me again why I bother looking for someone special, apart from the sex thing obviously.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:45, 74 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Same reason we all are
so we're not eaten by our pets
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:46, Reply)

So there's someone
To flick the kill-switch when you finally turn explosively mental?
That's my reason, anyway.
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:48, Reply)

Just think about being held
Strong arms encircling you. Lips kissing your cheek and whispering in your ear that everything is ok, you're safe and loved. You hand being held as you walk down the street. Know that you are the skining light in someone's eyes, you and nobody but you. That is why.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:49, Reply)

That and brown love.
:)
(TheColonel, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:55, Reply)

Pfft!
You've been reading too much Mills & Boon.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:55, Reply)

Not reading
I just write them. One day they'll let me out of my cell and disconnect the electrodes from my testicles.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:04, Reply)

I count that as foreplay.
Maybe that's where I'm going wrong.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:08, Reply)

I agree. (with the too much mills & boon)
I personally find it's not about that, but about being grateful that *this time* when they've let off an explosive fart under the duvet, they haven't wafted it.

Think on that instead.
(Psyche finishes work at the end of June! Yay!!!, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:11, Reply)

so you don't have to get out of bed to turn off the light

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:50, Reply)

Or make your own coffee all the time.

( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:53, Reply)

coffee is for pussies

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:59, Reply)

Whatever.
Tea is gay coffee.
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:01, Reply)

tea and coffee are both gay
and so is everyone who drinks them

in other new(t)s: I'll have a song for you to listen to later Kaol. singer is drunk, but you'll get the idea
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:04, Reply)

Ah, that's
Frogtastic news, thanks!
you've got my email, so just wang it over at some point.
*thumbs up*
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:09, Reply)

Tea is for nonces

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:04, Reply)

That's why I drink coffee.

( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:13, Reply)

^This
.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:53, Reply)

A good question
Which I don't have the answer to, regrettably.

Maybe staying single for the rest of eternity *is* the way forward for me.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:54, Reply)

Eternity is a long time Edmund.
Maybe just until you die : )
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:57, Reply)

Indeed.
Until I die? Hmm. Not too horrid an option, tbh.

Well, I've got a dog. She's a terrible conversationalist, but a great listener.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:02, Reply)

I worry though,
If I had a dog, and died, that it'd eat me.
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:04, Reply)

It's
only a shell, nothing else. The dog'd be welcome to it, although I'm pretty confident my dog will be gone before me.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:06, Reply)

I read this with
listener = lover
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:04, Reply)

Freak!
:)
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:06, Reply)

Stomach butterflies.
The good ones :)
(TheColonel, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:56, Reply)

Not the kind that
Grow from flesh-eating colon-maggots?
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:57, Reply)

Potato-potato
Wait....that doesn't work on the internet.

Tomato-tomato.....

....ah shit.
(TheColonel, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:01, Reply)

Yeah...
It's gut-destroying-time :(
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:15, Reply)

Man the fuck up
It's only company and sex - it's not like it's meat or anything....
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:00, Reply)

Actually...
It can be...
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:01, Reply)

Validation.
You just want someone else around so you can say "Look, I can't be that bad."
*Projection and self-reference*
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 18 May 2009, 15:04, Reply)

Nope!
I know I'm ace, it's just convincing guys I have problems with : )
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:06, Reply)

The only answer
Because someone special is looking for you, but is obviously looking in the wrong place. Therefore, by looking for someone special you are increasing their chances of finding you and then you'll be both be very happy little peoples.

And get a cat.

And a guinea pig called Alan.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:11, Reply)

Just to clarify?
When you say you are seeking 'someone special' you do not mean it as in 'special needs' do you? Because that would be weird even by B3ta standards.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:12, Reply)

No, not special needs.
Been there. *grin*
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:15, Reply)

Aaaarggghhh!
Pictures please!
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:27, Reply)

Yeah
I don't need to look.

I already know where they are
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:16, Reply)

How about getting someone ordinary
and pretending they're special?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:14, Reply)

Perhaps your expectations are too high?
Nobody is special, it's just that some people are more bearable than others.

Edit - Oops, sorry, you wanted cheering up. Here, have a pic of lucy, one of my rescue hens. (ignore, the "cock", I was messing around with paint)


( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:15, Reply)

I'm special

( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:16, Reply)

+ needs.

( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:18, Reply)

You sure are

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:18, Reply)

Cheap window cleaning?

(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:18, Reply)

Always remember
I'mThere's somebody out there waiting for you.

Waiting for you to turn out the lights and go to bed.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:23, Reply)

Night Vision goggles and
A litre of chloroform.
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:24, Reply)

I never leave home without them.
I mean, there's someone out there who doesn't leave home without them.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:28, Reply)

I do have an internet stalker but he can only manage part-time.
.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:29, Reply)

Reasonable Rates?
.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 18 May 2009, 15:35, Reply)

He does it for free so I shouldn't complain really.
.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:38, Reply)

Because
humans are designed to want to be in a couple. Although inevitably fuck it up so they can spend the rest of their time kicking themselves.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:33, Reply)

I'm on the same boat here
Although it's mainly my doing fucking most things up.

I mean, it could be bloody Scarlett Johannsen herself but I'm just far too busy doing my own selfish stuff like drinking, working, watching/playing football, playing nerdy games, travelling, hanging about with friends, working, spending money on pointless shit, etc etc.

What do you mean you want to come round tonight? I've been breaking my back all day and want to watch the season finale of The Wire before falling into a snoresome sleep for the pissy 6 hours I get.

Come round at the weekend, we can do the deed preferrably while drunk and then get the fuck out so I can have a showr, watch the Sunday football, drink copious amounts of tea while playing the Xbox.

Whoa reading that over this explains why I have trouble with girls. Although the current one seems to be bearing up alright.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:39, Reply)

Ah the ongoing
personal time Vs sexehtiem battle
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:43, Reply)

Yes
but what of those of us who have a surfeit of personal time?
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:44, Reply)

Then you need to get
some more hobbies? Get a Marina they are good time hoggers
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:45, Reply)

I've got some hobbies already
- but thanks.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:47, Reply)

I think there are people
who just want to spend every single moment with someone and other people who get to a "fuck off and give me my space" point.

Opposites do not attract in this instance.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:50, Reply)

Agreed.
And yet, I seem to be in the middle ground.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:53, Reply)

Stuck in the middle with yoooouuu
clowns to the left of me jokers to the riiiiggghhhhhht.

Oh and in answer to the original question: Morning snuggles.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 18 May 2009, 15:55, Reply)

Especially morning snuggles that lead to morning rogering.
.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:00, Reply)

In my book morning snuggling is an open invitation to rogering
Can anyone comfirn this as the trufax of life?
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:05, Reply)

Definitely not.
Written invitations only, in triplicate.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:06, Reply)

I just realised
That I spelt "confirm" as "comfirn".

That has to be one of the most hideous spelling errors that I've ever made.

Anyway back on topic, if that's the case then people better not hug me in the morning unless they fancy 4 inches of hard man-meat weasling it's way around your orifices.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:12, Reply)

Anything is an
open invite to rogering if you're insanely horny.

why is everyone looking at me like that?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:07, Reply)

Stop looking
Seriously, stop looking. My own experience is that it'll happen whatever you do. I met my G/F all through not feeling arsed to cook for myself on a random wednesday evening.
4 years next week!
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:01, Reply)

I'm not looking though.
All my past relationships have happened because I wasn't looking. I think that like Edmund, I'm destined to be alone.
( girlinthehole, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:04, Reply)

Destiny?
Pah!
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:09, Reply)

This!
What you need to concentrate on is meeting new people and being affable. Oh and being genuine, happy, confident and nice and showing why you're awesome.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:13, Reply)

Tried all of the above, in various combinations
I come across as being:

(a) arrogant wanker
(b) stuck-up twit
(c) lying

I've had some immensely powerful experiences in my life and have a materially comfortable life; I mean, at HDLs 40th birthday someone accused me of being an investment banker (Puh-leeze).

Why do I still end up sounding like a twat?
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:17, Reply)

You came across very well
at Dok's bash. I didn't think you were any of the above
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:34, Reply)

Thank you
That's very kind of you to say.

But - trust me - if you'd gotten the chance to know me better, I'm sure that I'd eventually come across as "Tim nice but dim" from the Harry Enfield show.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:39, Reply)

Enjoy
thechive.com/2009/05/scientific-evidence-chicks-are-crazy-25-photos/#more-35154
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 18 May 2009, 17:19, Reply)

Im special
... Maybe not in a good way, but special none the less!
(Is this a good idea? ... Yes this is definitely a good idea, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:15, Reply)

+ 2 cents
Mrs V and I were on the same uni course for 4 years, as mates.

Realised that on leaving the course we'd most likely not see each other much, if at all, and decided that would be shit.

5 years later here we are. both weirder than we were before thanks to each other's influence.

My point is, you need someone else around so you can blame them for how weird you have become.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:22, Reply)

If you don't mind me judging
That's a bit rare going from 4 years of friendship to shagging.

Usually once you enter "friend" status with ladiees it's impossible to get out!
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 18 May 2009, 16:42, Reply)