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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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You wait til you wireless from the loo.
Your life will be complete.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:06, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
I've done that
I was having a poo but had a long email to get on with.
:)
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:09, Reply)
Nothing like a poo to compose a long email.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:12, Reply)

to compose a long email.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:12, Reply)
This too.
The holy grail is a Plumpkin.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:14, Reply)
Is that a Magic Poo?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:18, Reply)
What's that?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:18, Reply)

A Plumpkin.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:20, Reply)
I just looked at that. That's fucking grim

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:22, Reply)
I'd be more satisfied with a magic poo.

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:25, Reply)
You weren't complaining last night, duckie.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:27, Reply)
But seriously, I'm not sure I could maintain tumescence while having a poo.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:28, Reply)
I always like to have a wee before pooing
and if you've got a stiffy you'll be weeing at the bathroom ceiling, and I don't like mopping the bathroom floor more often than once a month.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:29, Reply)
Evolution got that really wrong, allowing wees to happen even when a stiffy is in operation.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:33, Reply)
I didn't think that happened

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:36, Reply)
Neither does that precum thing.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:37, Reply)
*bokes*

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:40, Reply)
It can do

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:38, Reply)
Oh my god
Could a man have a wee in you if he was doing sex to you???
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:40, Reply)
Only if he really tried hard
but I suppose it could happen.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:41, Reply)
I suppose.
He'd have to be a colossal pervert, though. Just make sure you stay away from al.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:42, Reply)
Not by accident though??

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:45, Reply)
Yes. By 'accident'.
"I'm sorry love, I pissed up your chuff by accident."

I mean, that's what I'd say if I had been so uncouth as to use a Woman's vagina as a urinal.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:47, Reply)
I think I'm developing a new phobia
Oh my god, I'm holding out way longer than Lent at this rate.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:48, Reply)
If he tells you it's an accident he's lying

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:48, Reply)
If he does
you can always wee back at him and have a wee fight.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:46, Reply)
Most. Disturbing. Post. EVER.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:47, Reply)
I agree

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:48, Reply)
Oh.dear.god

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:50, Reply)
Evenin', becky!

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:52, Reply)
smooshes

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:54, Reply)
Thank GOD you're here

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:52, Reply)
I'm about to fuck off and have pizza, but I'll come back

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:54, Reply)
See that you do

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:55, Reply)
I once posted on b3ta
from the bath. It was a liberating experience.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:09, Reply)
I'd fear dropping my laptop and ruining it
Or giving myself a mild electric shock.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:10, Reply)
I put it on the laundry basket
to avoid such a possibility.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:12, Reply)
I thought you said you put it IN the laundry basket
Like some sort of basketcase! But you didn't, my eyes just don't work properly.

I would not be-able to do this though, as I don't have a laundry basket. Or a bath for that matter, so it's all for nothing really.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:18, Reply)
You could put your laptop in a plastic bag
and post from the shower
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:19, Reply)
Or get an umbrella.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:22, Reply)
Did you post that you were in the bath?
The internet would have gone wild.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:12, Reply)
I think I did
but I've been naked on here before and no-ones ever really cared.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:17, Reply)
I have but I wouldn't tell them
Do you have to lean out of the bath to reach the laundry basket?
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:19, Reply)
a bit
but not much, or I'd get cold and wouldn't bother.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:20, Reply)
OMG ROOTA
Prepare to receive some sweaty gazzes from internet menfolk.

A GIRL. NUDEY. ONLINE.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:21, Reply)
I'm not NOW!!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:23, Reply)
LIES!

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:26, Reply)
This is brilliant.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:30, Reply)
Oh my god no
It reminds me of one of my exes.
When he's doing it.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:33, Reply)
What, 'it'?
I thought you were pure!
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:34, Reply)
I meant when he was touching himself
I have never had sex
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:37, Reply)
He pointed at you while he touched himself?
Smooth mover.

*points* "See, baby? See what I could be doing to you?"
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:38, Reply)
HOUSELOLZ!
I meant the face, not the pointing.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:40, Reply)
I'm going to try this next time me and mrs get it on.
So, probably next year sometime.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:42, Reply)
You and 'Mrs Al' get it on all the time
Surely. I mean she's right there on the end of your arm.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:46, Reply)
Ahahahahahahahahahaa
ha
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:52, Reply)
WINNAR!

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:55, Reply)
I totally just gazzed her
asking for a naked picture of her in exchange for one of me
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:23, Reply)
Oh my God, I haz 1 unread message in red

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:24, Reply)
Ah, I may have failed.
My opening gambit was my cock.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:24, Reply)
Giving it away for free
Man-whore.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:26, Reply)
*gazzes*

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:27, Reply)
Thankfully, that link hasn't turned red yet
I don't want to see Devil-meat (and I don't mean quorn).
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:29, Reply)
You should
it's really cute, like a little cocktail sausage that hasn't been cooked yet. Only about half the size.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:30, Reply)
I prefer describing it as a 'dead bird'.
You know, the ones that fall out of the nest before they have feathers or anything.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:33, Reply)
It has a beak?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:33, Reply)
Hasn't everyone's got a beak?

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:35, Reply)
Aww, I hope mine didn't fall off
That wouldn't be good.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:35, Reply)
I found one of those and buried it
And a boy went past and laughed but I still buried it :(
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:34, Reply)
Awe.
Poor dead cockbird.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:37, Reply)
Its poor neck

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:37, Reply)
Ha, tiny cock joke
I've heard all the stories about what you and DiT got up to at that there Christmas party. For shame, that Geordie. For shame.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:33, Reply)
Look there's nothing wrong if two consenting adults want to bounce their testicles together to see what it's like

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:37, Reply)
It made me feel warm and safe.
And afterwards, sore.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:39, Reply)
That's how he does it
He makes you feel safe, then ups it until you're left as a crying wreck, cowering in the corner, and afraid to venture near the rest of humanity ever again.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:42, Reply)
I only felt sore
when your wife was spanking me. But you were asleep by then.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:43, Reply)
I sleep with one eye open.
I SAW IT ALL.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:48, Reply)
I'VE SEEN AL IN HIS PANTS

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:51, Reply)
My pants have seen you!

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:52, Reply)
Oh shit we're all doomed now

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:53, Reply)
My gosh
And you saw my pants on my wedding day!
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:54, Reply)
Oh bollocks, I appear to be a horrendous slut.
It was all innocent, honest guv
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 21:08, Reply)
That's why you were wanking like a chimp

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:51, Reply)
And flinging my poo around.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:54, Reply)

And this is why iSmell never took off.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 20:11, Reply)

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