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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Congratulations you've won a million quid, but you only have 48hrs to spend it
What do you do?

EDIT: No houses - it takes weeks to buy a house.

Alt Q: Transformers or Mask?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:09, 152 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
Buy the first million pound house I can find.
Wait a bit. Sell the house and then use the proceeds to live comfortably.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:11, Reply)
Buy a house. Buy my parents a house. Fill them both with nice stuff. Give to charidee, pay off my bills, do something about this Gran situation
hook my family up, pay off my friend's house. I reckon that oughta cover it.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:11, Reply)
you see I don't think you could buy a house in 48 hours too much admin

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:13, Reply)
With a million in cash you can.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:13, Reply)
You'd nver get the peperwork done, I don't think

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:15, Reply)
you don't know for SURE
what does the paperwork involve? all you'd need is a deed of sale right?
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:17, Reply)
Ok then....
I'd give it to Jeff for 48hrs of his private company.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:17, Reply)
hahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa loves it

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:19, Reply)
I'd have so many happy memories to live on.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:21, Reply)
That's more like, more friviolity
Who needs a house anyway
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:20, Reply)
I'm fairly certain you can.

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:16, Reply)
Buy land. Much quicker transfer of title.
But in anticipation of your edit to this 48 hrs being a Sunday and bank holiday - Diamonds or gold, Whisky, cloth, or drugs.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Gold's not that good an investment
It's too expensive just now.

That said, it's pretty safe, so you can sell it again to get money to buy a house once the paperwork's done.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:27, Reply)
Good advice from Mum -
in times of strife, buy whisky and blankets.
- as the wagon train pulled out.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:38, Reply)
Big tall house or top-floor flat
Must have roof-terrace.
Erm, some nice furniture and cushions and china, and STUFF.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:13, Reply)
I find your Alt-Q too insulting to warrant even the most contemptuous of replies
BGB's idea is pretty top-notch except that there's no such thing as just buying a house in a 48 hour period. Does the cash have to be spent, or can I simply stick it in a high-interest savings account? 5% on a mil is £50K a year
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:14, Reply)
Unless it's spent it's gone after 48 hours

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:16, Reply)
Ok then I'd buy lots of cars, then I'd sell them and begin the process of buying aforementioned stuff

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:17, Reply)
In which case, having had enough of this sensible investment malarky
I'd stick it all in my account and go MENTAL on the internet with my debit card

I'd pay a builder, cash up front, to stick an extension on the house

I'd fill it with shoes before Ms Foxtrot got home from work

Then I'd remind her that she said if I could ever afford to buy her a room full of shoes she'd marry me

Best keep a few grand over
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:20, Reply)
"Pay a builder , cash up front, to stick an extension on the house"
A-ha-ha-ha-hardy-har-har-har-ha.
Obviously never dealt with a builder from round here.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:27, Reply)
Don't even know where "round here" is
but the answer would still be no.

I see your point, but it was the only way I could think of to get it done! OK, I'd hire a REPUTABLE builder... oh, I see where this is going. Dang.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:34, Reply)
Mainly, I'd spend it
Mask for me, as I never knew Transformers when I was a little un
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:16, Reply)
Christ
No wonder you're so disturbed
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:18, Reply)
You're enjoying the fact you're not the only pariah on here aren't you?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:02, Reply)
Casino
whisky
high class prostitutes

edit: With whats left after I get a DB9 or vanquish
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:18, Reply)
Have a big
fuck off party. What I'd do with the rest of the money depends on what happens after the 48 hours. Death, give it back, what?

*EDIT* Halfy has the right idea - I'll have a V8 Vantage thankyou so very much.
(berk, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:19, Reply)
V12 - think big!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:21, Reply)
I'm only
wee - I think a V8 is plenty. Not that I'd turn down a V12 if I was offered one.

I'm sure there's a length gag in there somewhere...
(berk, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Not any more there isn't
*closes Big Book of Sex Puns*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:27, Reply)
Scrooge McDuck style moneypit

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:21, Reply)
try harder
You could have the worlds biggest croissant made for you, hollow it out and live in it?
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:22, Reply)
Like a smug french Bear Grills

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:27, Reply)
I've always wondered
how a ballpool style money pit would work. I mean, coins would be too sore and heavy to frolic in, and notes would be a bit flimsy.
(berk, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:27, Reply)
i would hire necker island for a month
and take you all

(except you. yeah, you. you know who you are.)
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:24, Reply)
I don't do hot places
Would you pay for a weekend at the Grand Hotel in Llandudno for me please?
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:26, Reply)
but on necker
you could have your own personal slaves to carry around the air conditioner and silk hangings to protect you from the sun?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:28, Reply)
But in Llandudno
I could stand in the moonlight on my balcony at the Grand Hotel in my diaphanous nightgown, gazing off at the Great Orme, as my gentleman caller fixes me a drink and puts The Eagles on the stereo.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:32, Reply)
there has to be a happy medium
how about a five star in antarctica? free penguins!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:36, Reply)
Can I have Llandudno,
but with penguins shipped to my room?
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:38, Reply)
you are taking more than your share of my million
this means someone else doesn't get to go to necker. who should i cut from the invite list?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:39, Reply)
My dude
I need somebody to duet with on Stay by Shakespears Sister on the karaoke in the Autumn Lounge on the pier.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:51, Reply)
The good thing about hot places though
is that the surrounding water is a nice temperature for swimming in. So you could spend all day in the sea and only come out at night once it's cooled off.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:30, Reply)
and get BURNT by the sun as I swim

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:32, Reply)
There is such stuff as sunscreen, y'know.
You can even get waterproof versions. And rswipe might be nice enough to hire some young blokes to rub it in for you.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:34, Reply)
I hate being covered in grease just so I don't burn
Roasting hot places just don't do it for me.
And what need have I for young blokes?
In Llandudno they're all old.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:37, Reply)
Fair enough
Each to their own!

I don't like being covered in suncream either, actually. But I see it as a fair price to pay for being able to go to nice warm places on holiday.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:38, Reply)
I went to school with the branson children, they never invited me to Necker

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:27, Reply)
my parents went once
it does look fucking awesome

but maybe it was still a nasty mosquito infested swamp when you were at school?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:29, Reply)
Too long ago, I left in 2000 I guess

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:32, Reply)
Did you get any free jars of pickle?

(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:30, Reply)
I was going to post that and thought better of it.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:31, Reply)
Carpe diem
In for a penny, in for a pound.

And other such expressions.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:35, Reply)
You ain't going nowheres, rswipe.
You've got a mountain of conveyancing to do by Monday.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:29, Reply)
argh
don't remind me. instead i am lounging around my flat like Fat Bastard on steroids. well, rowntrees fruit pastille lollies.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:30, Reply)
I'll be somewhere on Denmark Street if you need me

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:27, Reply)
Ooh - I've got a list for you while you're there.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:28, Reply)
I've a list as well
Trouble is, my flatmate generously promised me that, if he won the lottery, he'd take me to Denmark Street and let me buy any guitar I wished.

In the meantime, so runs the deal, he would be out purchasing a woodchipper, through which he would then put said recently purchased guitar, "but I could watch."
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Is that
Tin Pan Alley? I went there the last time I was in London to have a cheeky try on a saxophone I knew full well I would never, ever be able to afford. It was so beautiful I nearly wept when I had to give it back.

/sigh
(berk, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:29, Reply)
'tis
And I have a similar heartache every time I walk past the specialist bass guitar shop and see that gorgeous 1972 Fender Precision in the window.

Only 2 1/2 grand, last time I looked...
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Yeah
I would cheerfully sell a kidney for this: www.sax.co.uk/acatalog/shadowtenor.html

can someone tell me how to do that blue hyperlink thingy, please?
(berk, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:50, Reply)
That does look absolutely gorgeous
As the owner of a dirt-cheap alto, I can appreciate your pain.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:52, Reply)

Denmark Old Compton
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:29, Reply)
Next stop. Just bring that gear over
here Mr Crow.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:32, Reply)
My friends love that place, I've not been yet
I'm usually found here
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:37, Reply)
Million quid should last nearly a week there.
- we're going for outright depravity, not mere dilettante toying, right?
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:41, Reply)
White Heat? Nah, fuckin' expensive
£7 for double gin? Sad fucking face.


I guess I'd be buying drinks, and if we went back to Camberwell, there'd be M.D. involved.

Lampito in no way endorses Massive Drugs. In my experience people on coke are wankers, but Ket's all fine and dandy
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:48, Reply)
Probably best if I hit Denmark Street *before* I go anywhere near Gerry's or the Whisky Shop

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:42, Reply)
I'd buy a small Greek island
There're a lot of them being sold off, and it's likely you'd get a good deal because Greece is a bit skint.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:29, Reply)
Pretty small
for a mill, surely? You'd be lucky to get three rocks and four square feet of sand.
(berk, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:31, Reply)
So long
as it's big enough to plonk a wee shack on to live in, it would be fine.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:33, Reply)
MASSIVE DRUGS
and supermodels.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:30, Reply)
and a fleet of honda accords

(Halfy By light alone, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:31, Reply)
I believe the collective noun is 'A Retribution of Accords'

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:35, Reply)
I'd buy B3ta and ban everyone who wasn't nice to me.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:30, Reply)
you could get the same effect by just not coming on here

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:32, Reply)
Yes but where is the fun in that.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:33, Reply)
But then what would be your raison d'etre?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:33, Reply)
I'd be nice to you. Reeeal nice.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:48, Reply)
CRACK ATTACK!


Alt Q: neither. I am an adult.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:32, Reply)
no you aren't

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:33, Reply)
Oh. Bugger.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:34, Reply)
That you are.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 21 May 2010, 14:50, Reply)
OBJECTION
if you paid in cleared funds and weren't fussy about things like local authority searches, you could indeed buy a house in a matter of hours!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:35, Reply)
Hooray!!!!!
Money talks!
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:35, Reply)
fair enough, too easy an answer though!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:36, Reply)
I know.
I already have a house so I'm going with the Jeff idea.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:37, Reply)
Listen up, everyone
to someone who knows what they're talking about.

*buys hypothetical house with hypothetical £1M*
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:36, Reply)
i might frame this
and show everyone at work
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:38, Reply)
Heh.
You are the only property lawyer I know of on here, so I'm assuming you know more about this sort of stuff than the rest of us.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:40, Reply)
not if you want to buy in that there scotland
wouldn't have a clue
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:40, Reply)
It's the same
Only different.

Other legal opinions may be available
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:42, Reply)
I'd buy a new arse.
This one's got a crack in it.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:39, Reply)
I'm sure Monty
would offer to rip anyone a new arsehole if they asked.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:40, Reply)
I'm here to help.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:56, Reply)
I'd buy a Figaro, and prepay a year's worth of driving lessons
I'd hit Beyond Retro and Oxford Street, with a whistlestop trip to Portobello for nice undies.

Get my hair done nicely, and maybe a really luxury spa day with my bezzies.


OOH, and a Steinway.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:40, Reply)
invest it in iraqi dinar

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:42, Reply)
An Iraqi diner?
Is that like Burka King?
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:43, Reply)
*comedy trombones*

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:47, Reply)
*comedy space docking*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:57, Reply)

space
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:59, Reply)
I would hire Alyson Hannigan, Katherine Heigl and Kate Beckinsale
and a giant paddling pool full of jelly

And then I would make them fight
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:43, Reply)
to the death?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Nah
If I wanted them dead I'd have to insist it be done by Donkey Punch
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:55, Reply)
Even that sounds gay.
How do you do it?
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Years of practice baby
David Walliams has made a career out of being camp as tits and in no way funny. Sooner or later it'll be my turn
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:56, Reply)
go to vegas and live like Paris Hilton

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:48, Reply)

like off
+ 's corpse
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:49, Reply)
there's not much to go on there buddy

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:51, Reply)
Just enough to shit down her severed neck

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:04, Reply)
I'd rather get her drunk and pay her to suck my cock
if it were real I'd spunk in her lazy eye
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:06, Reply)
POTD

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:06, Reply)

eye brain
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:07, Reply)
I think she could have fun with Super Blue, I'm sure there's some way I could get it to jizz all in her hair
I'd smear her make up with it, make her my bitch
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:09, Reply)
I like your style
You should join me on my grammar-rapes
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:13, Reply)
cool
think I need a lie down first though
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:19, Reply)
I would bet it all
but spread bet it so that I couldn't lose, then I'll keep the million to spend at a reasonable rate.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:51, Reply)
"Loose?"
Like your anal ring?

Well ninjaed
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:54, Reply)
Coming from you!

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:56, Reply)
I will enforce the correct usage of the words "lose" and "loose"
even if I have to sentence every offender to DEATH BY BUMDERING
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:58, Reply)
*dons executioner's hood*

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:00, Reply)
I'm pleased to see you are finally embracing the fact that you are a gargantuan Bertie Woofter

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:02, Reply)
If I hadn't said it someone else would have
Better to make the joke and take the plaudits than to endure the joke and the jibes that follow thereafter. Learnt that in school. It was there that my crippling self-esteem issues began to manifest themselves, forcing me to seek out the company of my fellow social inadequates.

In short, the reason I'm here, annoying you, is because of people like you.

You bastard.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:09, Reply)
You poofter

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:09, Reply)
I was referring to the fact you commented on the slackness of someone's anal passage
I'd imagine yours was so roomy you could house a family of Tibetans.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:11, Reply)
Oh, I know what you were referring to
But you assume I'm the sort of bumder that receives.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:12, Reply)
You blatantly are.
Your last boyfriend made you grow your hair so he could hold on to it while he was rogering you.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:13, Reply)
Actually,
I think you'll find my last boyfriend made me shave my head after I misplaced the itchy marrow
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:15, Reply)
Two fruits and a vegetable.
Could almost be a crap sitcom.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:18, Reply)
Sounds like a potential spin-off from Will and Grace
if one of the actors ever has an accident which leaves them slobbering in a wheelchair for the rest of their natural life
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:21, Reply)
Wheels and Grace

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:21, Reply)
^ nice

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:24, Reply)
You set them up, I knock 'em down.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:25, Reply)
That is one of my most hated spelling mistakes.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:57, Reply)
It really makes me want to rape people

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:59, Reply)
till they're loose?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:07, Reply)
It would teach them the difference
A "lesson" they'd never forget.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:08, Reply)
a sexy lesson

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:10, Reply)
Deeply sexy
And always, ALWAYS grammatically correct.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:18, Reply)
Thanks!
One tries one's best.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:23, Reply)
You can't really get away with using that as your excuse.

I've tried, believe me. 'It was the spelling mistakes, your honour'
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:08, Reply)
"Your honour, I present, for your consideration
the prose submitted by my accuser. Note how she has not only used the archaic present participle 'loosing' where she clearly meant 'losing,' but has also, in the same sentence, reverted to so-called 'Americanised' spelling and at least one 'grocer's apostrophe'. Does it not just make you tumescent with rage?"
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:12, Reply)
if he doesn't bend her over the bench he's insane

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:13, Reply)
I hate 'swop'.
Apparently it's allowed, but then so are neon legwarmers. Doesn't mean you should.
And I certainly don't want to see it it in my local newspaper.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 14:59, Reply)
It's not allowed by me.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:04, Reply)
good

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:10, Reply)
me too
unfortunately my mrs does it frequently....
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:02, Reply)
AND YOU WANT TO MARRY HER!!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:06, Reply)
Well he doesn't want to loose her

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:07, Reply)
too late for that
IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:11, Reply)
AND YOU STILL WANT TO MARRY HER?
That's dedication...
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:14, Reply)
I heard
her farts have dropped a whole octave since you started seeing her, you randy goat. Brings new meaning to 'slacker chic'.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:17, Reply)

cache.jalopnik.com/cars/assets/resources/2007/06/Ariel-Atom-2-Clarkson.jpg

I think the cars about 30k, (maybe outrageous lie).

Alternatively I'd spend the £1m on a hitman to kill the cunt driving it.
(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 21 May 2010, 15:16, Reply)

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