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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I watched Magnolia the other day
I wasn't expecting it to be 3 hours long, I wasn't expecting it to be really weird, and I certainly wasn't expecting the torrential rain of frogs.

worth a watch though, if only for Tom Cruise's first line "respect the cock!"

seen anything good recently?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:53, 112 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
Saw 'Amelie' the other day
Had put it off because it looked like a chick flick. It's rather good!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:56, Reply)
I like the bit with the guy doing rolls along the floor with a dog stood on top of him

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:01, Reply)
I like the petty yet genius revenge tactics she uses

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:02, Reply)
Yes, I own a mirror.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:56, Reply)
*snort*

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:59, Reply)
massive drugs

(PsychoChomp, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:01, Reply)
I saw ym, shaking her toosh for small change.
That was quite good. Well, I say quite good. The police turned up before she could get any serious cash together.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:57, Reply)
'Serious gash', you mean.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:59, Reply)
there's nothing serious about it

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:01, Reply)
It's known locally as 'Wookiee Hole'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:02, Reply)
he should be so lucky
she has some standards
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:07, Reply)
You can say that again.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:02, Reply)
there's nothing serious about it

(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:08, Reply)
saw a naked man in a bathrobe cycle by
the second time that's happened to me here
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:04, Reply)
Not really naked then..

(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:05, Reply)
it was flying behind
like a cape. So yeah pretty much
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:09, Reply)
Sounds liberating
I might do that when I get home
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:10, Reply)
That would depend on the colour of your bathrobe

(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:16, Reply)
Mine's black

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:16, Reply)
like the Sith?

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:17, Reply)
That'll do

(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:18, Reply)
pig, that'll do

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:19, Reply)
Brilliant film that is, always makes me cry

(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:25, Reply)
You've now made my bathrobe
10 times more awesome.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:19, Reply)
mine is black and hooded
:-)
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:23, Reply)
Damn, mine lacks a hood
I shall have to buy a new one.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:25, Reply)
you may as well just buy the brown one with the jedi logo on it

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:26, Reply)
Sith are cooler than Jedi
FACT
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:29, Reply)
true
but you can't yet buy authentic Sith bath robes
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:30, Reply)
I was thinking brown and hooded
like a good Jedi
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:26, Reply)
Proper answer:
I really, really enjoyed Frost/Nixon.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:05, Reply)
I might watch Fight Club tonight
I want to see Rec2, but I might poo my pants.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:09, Reply)
They've made a REC 2?!
Is it in Spanish like the first?
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:10, Reply)
Yep
It's set directly after the first one
(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:13, Reply)
Oooooo
Exciting! I need to see that.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:13, Reply)
Oh fucking GET IN!
REC was the first film in ages, and most recent, to actually scare me.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:14, Reply)
Yes
that ending was fucking mental. Worst of all I was really hungover and naturally had the shakes so I ended up shaking like a peadophile in a playground.
(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:16, Reply)
WHY DID HE HAVE TO PUT THE CAMERA THROUGH THE LOFT HATCH!?
And why didn't he dry his hair before he went out!? Doesn't he know you can catch cold doing that!?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:17, Reply)
I am still in shock
that he didn't catch the cold. It goes against everything I ever believed in.
(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:18, Reply)
He did
That's how he ended up like that.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:19, Reply)
Holy fuck
I'm never leaving the house with wet hair again.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:27, Reply)
I really can't recommend it

(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:28, Reply)
Same!
The bit where the firefighter fell over the stairs, I love to rewind that and watch it again cos it's guaranteed to make me jump a foot in the air everytime.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:32, Reply)
in all honesty
it's nowhere near as good as the first one.

it's similar to how Blair Witch went all commercial with their sequel, and was utter shite.

still quite good, and worth a watch (and perhaps a handy pair of spare keks)

and where the film is set is five minutes down the hill from my office
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:00, Reply)
I went to see Drunk in Public last week
(Levellers acoustic spin off) at Tan Hill Inn and they were totally awesome man and Mark the lead singer like totally snogged my face off outside after the gig and I haven't washed my face since well not properly anyway just a baby wipe to get the thick off but I will never wash my mouth again.
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:10, Reply)
Haha!
Poor DG.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:11, Reply)
Poor DG my arse
He was totally copping off with the fiddle player's hawt girlfriend ;o)
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:13, Reply)
You two are a right pair of swingers
It's true what they say about the north.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:15, Reply)
Why thank you!
What were you doing passing through Morpeth, anyway? Had you been to Edinburgh or somewhere nice?
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:17, Reply)
Edinburgh for my stag night

(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:27, Reply)
Canny night bonny lad?

(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:39, Reply)
Ai it were reet canny thanks.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:45, Reply)
can you (or pls ask DG)
repost the link to that article about north east dialect/language please?

I need it to help me have sex with a real live lady. It's very important.

Thank you
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:19, Reply)
The one from your previous posts?
You should totally go for her, she sounds great for you if you can MTFU and get over her accent ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:20, Reply)
I fear rejection A LOT.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:21, Reply)
Welcome to my world.
But you have so much going for you.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:22, Reply)
I have more baggage than a Louis Vuitton warehouse
*SADFACE*
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:25, Reply)
*in cliched American TV ad accent*
"Fear rejection? Shy? Nervous? Try cocaine! Guaranteed to turn any wallflower into a confident behemoth in minutes."
*said very fast*
"Somesideeffectsincludenosebleedshyperventilationlossofmoneyandturningintoatotalfuckingarsehole*
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:35, Reply)
It makes me quite introverted.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:40, Reply)
You are kidding me?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:45, Reply)
No.
I think prolonged heavy use does that. :(
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:48, Reply)
Sounds like she's not going to reject you dude
And everyone fears rejection to some degree. Ask her if she fancies going for a drink one night, and go from there.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:23, Reply)
I think I may.
Thank you for your engouragement (BGB too).

Armed with DG's link I have a non-gay reason to contact her and could combine this with suggesting drinks.

*ponders*
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:27, Reply)
Ask he if she fancies a hot meat taste explosion in her mouth
then take her to Tayyabs and make her give you a blow job in the toilets.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:28, Reply)
I've spotted a problem with this potential relationship
she's not a big gay man, so is unlikely to keep your interest for long
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:31, Reply)
She could pretend by sucking a magnet and dipping her chin in iron filings
and then grasping a large dildo between her thighs and brutally sodomising Monty.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:32, Reply)
HAHAHA :o)
Best Viz top tip EVA!
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:35, Reply)
I suspect that would work well for him

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:38, Reply)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Of course, dear Monty. I shall text him this instant.
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:23, Reply)
You are a wonder of the modern world.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:25, Reply)
He can't access b3ta at work anymore :(
I've asked him to either gaz you when he gets home or point me in the direction of it.
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:37, Reply)
That's really most kind.
If it helps me get some 'fanny' I shall shout both your names at point of orgasm, by way of a thank you.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:39, Reply)
Would that be before or after whispering "awooga" in her ear?
Fingers firmly crossed for some dangly ham action :o)
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:42, Reply)
Before. Definitely before.
I may well bottle it, if I'm honest.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:51, Reply)
Nah, go for it kidda!
I'm off out now for a spot of lunch with my folks. We'll sort that link out for you!
xxx
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:01, Reply)
'You're Gonna Miss Me'
www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B000P0J060/bofc

Harrowing, hilarious, touching - it's fucking brilliant. Not for most people, probably, but I loved it. At one point he's talking to a 'Mr Potato Head' toy.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:11, Reply)
Do you ever read, watch, listen to anything normal?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:12, Reply)
If he did that he'd have nothing left.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:14, Reply)
No.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:15, Reply)
There must be one little thing regarding popular culture that you secretly find interesting or amusing.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:17, Reply)
My money is on Boyzone
the great shirter
(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:17, Reply)
Jackie Chan?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:19, Reply)
Wasn't that an Abba song?

(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:20, Reply)
Yay! I love Jackie Chan so it must be classed as popular culture.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:20, Reply)
"Jackie Chan...Jackie Chan...Jackie Chan
Let me rock you, Jackie Chan
Let me rock you, that's all I wanna do..."
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:27, Reply)
I was thinking
'I like Jackie Chan - DOT COMMM'

JACKIE
JACKIE
JACKIE
JACKIE
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:28, Reply)
This:
www.rathergood.com/abba
(I helped save b3ta! Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:49, Reply)
Ha!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:43, Reply)
Last night Jackie Chan came round, we played pong with him and we hung out

(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:29, Reply)
Mr Miyagi and the Axeman
called in for a while as well
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:49, Reply)
Mr Miyagi and the X-men called in for a while as well.
EDIT - Damn it, always refresh before you reply.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:55, Reply)
I was always told it was the Axeman
who I assumed to be some kung fu god I've never heard of, but I've looked it up and you appear to be correct. Why would the XMen be at a kung fu night?
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:04, Reply)
I love Jackie Chan,
have you seen fobidden Kingdom.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:33, Reply)
No, it is a new one?
My favourite is 'Half a Loaf of Kung Fu'
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:37, Reply)
Yeah it's a new one,
www.imdb.com/title/tt0865556/
it's got jet li in it too, sounds shit from the description but it's good stupid fun.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:40, Reply)
I love Jet Li
he's so hot.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:44, Reply)
He is excellent.
I cannot comment on his 'hotness'
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:46, Reply)
I love him in Lethal Weapon 4
he's so evils.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:48, Reply)
Is it worth the £25?
*sings*
"I'm not comin' home.
Oh, oh, oh, yeah!"
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:24, Reply)
You can get it elsewhere for less.
It's brilliant.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:30, Reply)
I watched 50 Dead Men Walking recently
good old fashiong IRA snitching film.
(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:17, Reply)
I watched Zatoichi
and rewatched The Lives of Others. Both good films in different ways
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:19, Reply)
Zatoichi is excellent.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:19, Reply)
I was impressed
by the bizarre little musical sequence of the people working in the village
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:20, Reply)
Seconded

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:21, Reply)
the Rutger Hauer remake is quite good too innit

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:33, Reply)
its no
Salute of the Jugger though

zatoichi is an ace film, saw let the right one in the other week, wasn't sure what to expect but found it absolutely fantastic

Just waiting for my friend to turn up thgen its back off to the beer festival for day 4!
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:35, Reply)
Get in there!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:39, Reply)
I have drunk
my own body weight in milds, stouts and porters this week!

Egg chasing tomorrow as well, so that will involve obscene amounts of guinness then around a week to detox!
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:43, Reply)
Ouch.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:47, Reply)
ouch indeed!
took it sensibly wednesday and yesterday, and same again today, you can get away with drinking halves at beer fests.

right he's here, have a good weekend all, pray for my liver!
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:51, Reply)
I did enjoy Russel Crowe in Robin Hood
I know it was wrong in every respect historically, geographically, accent, etc. but he bigs it up for the English over the French, so it was a laugh.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:42, Reply)

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