b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post767207
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:01, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

I agree with every one of those things

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:02, Reply)

same same

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:03, Reply)

I came up with a fairly nice punishment for them all as well.
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post767191
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:04, Reply)

But...
...you seemed so nice IRL.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)

I'm lovely.
Just don't piss me off, yeah?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)

What is this, a Simpsons flashback episode?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:06, Reply)

Everybody Dance Now!
*steelworks*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:06, Reply)

It can be if you want
I just couldn't be arsed typing it all out again.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post771069
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:13, Reply)

'Apparently' hot? APPARENTLY??
Harrumph.
And I reckon I should be worth more than +500 reputation points.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:16, Reply)

+700 I reckon

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:17, Reply)

So she's hotter than one of your boobs
But not the two combined.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:20, Reply)

One boob looks a bit lonely
two is just right.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)

good point
she can be +1000.

So technically I'm only +500
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:23, Reply)

This is better.
And you're +1000 without the boobs. Add those on, and its like +2000.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:30, Reply)

ah
but we're talking rep points after Lampito.

So she got +1000 rep points for snogging you ( for your hotness)
and +500 rep points for snogging me. If she'd have gone in for the boob grope, that would have supplied more rep points.

Sadly none of this cancels out Chompy
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:32, Reply)

I'm going to score you thussly in a totally creepy and borderline rapey manner
Applebite (including both boobs) +1000
Amberl (without any boobs) +800
Amberl (including both boobs) + 1800
Applebite (if you give her ten pounds for the whole night) +2000
(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:34, Reply)

AmberI with Applebite's leg on her chest
5,000.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:37, Reply)

Amberl with Applebites leg on her chest when you give her ten pounds for the whole night
+7000
(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:41, Reply)

I won't be impressed if you turn this ten pounds thing into a meme.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

I'm already doing it

(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:45, Reply)

I hate you.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:49, Reply)

But if I give you this crumpled tenner
you'll love me all night long
(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:54, Reply)

If I give her an extra fiver
Do you think she'll love me for a bit of the morning too?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:56, Reply)

No, she has her dignitiy
but if you give her a fiver she'll leave her knickers behind when she walks home.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:57, Reply)

Oh alright then

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:02, Reply)

That's still 300 less than both your breasts put together.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)

I say "apparently"...
cos I haven't met you. Or seen any photos

EDIT: That sounds a bit molesty. Am not after photos, just explaining myself from the bottom of this ever-deepening hole
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:24, Reply)

*hands spade*

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:28, Reply)

*puts hands on hips*
*raises one eyebrow*
*taps foot*
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:30, Reply)

Are you watching me dig? It's not worth your while
By all accounts (ie everyone I know who HAS met you) you're absurdly attractive, but it would be remiss of me to awaken Pandatron based on hearsay alone
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:33, Reply)

*dons hardhat*
*consults clipboard*
*tuts*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:33, Reply)

I had my hard hat on earlier
I'm still wearing my work trousers
(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:35, Reply)

my a hat
'm still wearing spluffed in
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:38, Reply)

What?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:40, Reply)

she clearly wants you to be saying
I had a hat my hard hat on earlier
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:43, Reply)

Ssshh
fixed it now.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:45, Reply)

on a seperate note
nice bikini. I'm searching for one at the moment
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:11, Reply)

Cheers
It came yesterday. It's ace. Tiny though, I loves it.
You should have a look at asos, they've got some really nice ones. Or Next, they're good.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:13, Reply)

I'm getting a new bikini!!!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:14, Reply)

podjtpwioidh

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:15, Reply)

stuck on the 'wio' bit...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:16, Reply)

pictures of djtrialprice wearing it, or it didn't happen

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Haha!
No way dude. It took me a long time to find it.
I'm not having him looking better in it than me.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:20, Reply)

My pecs could probably fill Applebite's bikini
But I've no chance with yours
( djtrialprice, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:43, Reply)

do you and Roota
want to be March and April?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:45, Reply)

I'm game
Although really I should be February as that's when I was born.
And he was born in April.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:47, Reply)

February and April it is

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:58, Reply)

I shall wear heart pasties on my nips
In honour of St. Valentine
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:01, Reply)

I think that means
I have to wear dead leaves. October isn't the nicest month
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:02, Reply)

Halloween's in October
So, little pumpkin or skull pasties are in order.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:04, Reply)

I want May
So I can be in a wood, maybe in a tree in a leaf pasties and flower knickers.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:06, Reply)

I'm ok with that.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:10, Reply)

Hmmmmm
Bjork + Leaf = Hotness
( djtrialprice, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:12, Reply)

Alright Mr. De Mille,
I'm ready for my close-up
( djtrialprice, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:52, Reply)

Now I'm imagining you with a big pompadour wig
and a parasol.

Oh, and you're winking coquettishly at the camera, you naughty thing you!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:55, Reply)

It's all about the face daaahling!

( djtrialprice, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:58, Reply)

That's good, then you don't need to wax your legs

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:00, Reply)

Giggity

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:46, Reply)

this word
reminds me of Noel Streatfeild
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:48, Reply)

Who?
Why?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:53, Reply)

she used to write oldfashioned books
like Ballet Shoes and White Boots and that was an exclamation of happiness in them
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:59, Reply)

How things get corrupted...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:00, Reply)

This makes me think "B3ta swimsuit calendar". Standard version= good, drag version=hilarity.
( Labmonkey last thought about having another coffee on, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)

I like this idea.
Dibs on October. Or May.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:26, Reply)

if you take May
I'll have October
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:30, Reply)

*Looks at watch expectantly*
*realises watch only tells time*
*abandons all pretence at allegory*

Is it October yet?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:34, Reply)

Dunno, is AA awake yet?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:36, Reply)

I actually could poke him
but only in a really tragic tweenage way
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:40, Reply)

Hahahahaha

( djtrialprice, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:42, Reply)

you beauty

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

Masterful.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 18:10, Reply)

I want September
I will be pictured asleep.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:29, Reply)

Ooo, what's it like?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:16, Reply)

I'm a vintage type girl, so it's red with white polka dots
Shortsy type knickers all ruched at the sides with a bra top that actually comes in my cup size!

I'm thinking of getting it in black too, because it's SO rare that i see a shape of swimsuit that suits my old fashioned taste and doesn't cost £75
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:19, Reply)

that sounds amazing
any bikini I buy ever is rubbish and yet horrifically expensive. Maybe I should just stick to one pieces
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:20, Reply)

I'd prefer a one-piece in a lot of respects,
But the high street stopped making them in that shape I like years ago. And now you can only buy the type I like for millions of dollar on 'vintage' websites.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)

I have a lovely salmon pink large polka dot halterneck swimsuit for my hols.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:27, Reply)

Does it have shortsy legs or knickersy legs?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:29, Reply)

Knickersly legs.
But it is a bra sized cup which is what is most important for me.

I also have a turquoise swimsuit with frilly bits at the front of the cup and they make my cleavage FUCKING AWESOME.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:35, Reply)

I prefer shortsy legs y'see
Knickersy ones give an unflattering line
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:36, Reply)

I have a long body and big boobs so I'm stuck for what I can get to fit me.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:38, Reply)

I have a very short body and comparatively big boobs
Fitted dresses don't fit me :(
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:39, Reply)

*croissants*
( djtrialprice, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:59, Reply)

Hahaha

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:59, Reply)

Wit woo!
Sounds awesome! I love bikinis like that, but I don't think I could pull it off.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:23, Reply)

you could wear a shellsuit and look fit.
I hate you
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:23, Reply)

^ this
on the other hand Roota, you can wear all the vintage clothing and look fantastic.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:26, Reply)

Ta la!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:29, Reply)

You do need a certain something to pull the vintage look off.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:30, Reply)

You can do the boho/hippy vintage thing
We saw the photo! You could still work that one.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:36, Reply)

I know : )
I've decided to become an old hippy.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:39, Reply)

Do it!
I may have to turn into a 1950s pin up as I don't seem to be able to work any of these new fangled fashions.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:42, Reply)

To be honest, apart from when I went a bit clubby, I've always been a hippy.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

I just searched asos
apparantly only thin people are catered for :(
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:14, Reply)

Surely not.
I get stuff from there.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)

I meant bikini wise
I searched by size. One match. Checked the actual product and that size doesn't exist for it. Lies on the internet

Also! www.thebigbikinicompany.com/ load of bollocks.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:24, Reply)

Bravissimo.
Expensive but fit fantastically and will last years.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:25, Reply)

not so sure
I handwash my bras from there, and they're still showing signs of wear and tear after only a bit.

I just want a really cheap bikini that I can chuck if necessary, because I'm quite broke
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:26, Reply)

Well I don't know what your doing to them.
My stuff last ages.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:28, Reply)

Maybe I'm a bit rough on them

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:32, Reply)

One of the very greatest benefits
of having next to no boobs is £5 bras from matalan.
(berk, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:33, Reply)

*seeths*

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:35, Reply)

^this
and really pretty ones as well
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:37, Reply)

Sorry
but at the same time, one of the very greatest downsides is having no boobs to speak of. I would gladly swap my 'ping pong balls in a sock' for a decent pair of funbags even if it did mean paying £40 a bra. Sadtimes :(
(berk, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:37, Reply)

Oh well.
We're never satisfied with what Mother Nature gave us.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:40, Reply)

I am
Cockwise, anyway
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

you are giving mother nature credit for all the gay sex you get?


yes, I realise this isn't getting my work done
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:46, Reply)

I'm worried that you anticipated my first response
Mother nature had nowt to do with the development of poppers as far as I know
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:48, Reply)

if my mrs were in her office I'd find out where she got hers
because it fits all your criteria.

sadly she's not, so I can't help you.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:34, Reply)

I'd love to hear that conversation
"Oh hi dear, how's your day going?"
"yeah good thanks, how's yours?"
"Yeah it's going alright, listen, where do you get your bikinis from?"
"Why?"
"Well, there's this girl on the internet that I'm"
"WHAT!?"
"No, No, it's not like that, there's this girl right, on this"
"You're talking to girls on the internet about their bikinis!?"
"Well, yes, but like I said it's"
"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!? YOU CALL ME IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY AT WORK TO TELL ME YOUR BUSY WANKING OVER GIRLS ON THE INTERNET AND THEIR BIKINIS?"
"NO! No, listen, babes, calm down okay It's not like that"
"CALM DOWN! CALM FUCKING DOWN! I'LL GIVE YOU CALM DOWN YOU FUCKING CHEATING BASTARD! HOW DARE YOU! I WANT YOU OUT OF THE HOUSE WHEN I GET BACK! DON'T CALL ME AGAIN YOU FUCKING ARSEHOLE!"
"Babe, wait, no listen"
"click ...... brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr"
"Babe? Babe? Are you there babes?"
(Bazongaloid, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:39, Reply)

Hahahahaha!

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:41, Reply)

Hahahahahaha!
Whoops, BGB beat me to it.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

amusing as that is
it'd go: "someone on b3ta is after a bikini. where did you get yours?"
and then she'd tell me.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:45, Reply)

If I ran that by Ms Foxtrot
I think she'd want to know the hotness level of the people involved
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:46, Reply)

well go on then
tell us which version becomes real.

And then I'll have the name
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:47, Reply)

she's out on site today so won't be till tonight
if I remember than I'll find out
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:53, Reply)

Ugly girls
are so much more placid because they're grateful
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:50, Reply)

Strue that.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:52, Reply)

that's as may be
but mrs V isn't ugly.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:53, Reply)

She pure ain't

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:59, Reply)

I know V
I'm just pulling your leg. Congrats on your engagement by the way, when's the wedding?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:11, Reply)

thanks
not until september 2011 I think. need time to save. mostly for the honeymoon.

today the mrs got offered a discount if we have our wedding at a fancy hotel she has designed the structure of. could be interesting.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:21, Reply)

Ah, oh dear.
I recommend next then.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:23, Reply)

Just realised your talking about bikinis.
I don't do bikinis.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:25, Reply)

Me neither
Only in the USA do I wear them - most of them are like beached whales so one extra won't be noticed.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:30, Reply)

I went topless once years ago on a beach in Tenerife.
*shames*
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:36, Reply)

I did it once on a Greek Island
I got banned.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:37, Reply)

Rubbish
You've got most excellent funbaggage.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:39, Reply)

It wasn't them so much as
a)the glare and
b)the rest of the acres of flesh
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

I wouldn't dare go topless on a beach
for fear that the whales would start singing 'We are family'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:40, Reply)

There were ninety year old German women walking around topless.
I felt stupid being so prude about it. I'd probably do it if I was not with anyone I know.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:42, Reply)

I ain't showing a beach full of strangers my raspberries

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

What about your grapes?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:49, Reply)

Nor them

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:56, Reply)

90% of them wouldn't be bothered about your raspberries.
The other 10% will be looking at nothing else but your raspberries.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:50, Reply)

I just couldn't
I've had burlesque lessons and considered showing a room full of people my raspberries covered by nothing but tassles.
But just wandering around on a beach, no fucking chance.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:57, Reply)

It's only in the last year or so that I can get undressed in the gym changing rooms
without running into the corner.

There's only so many times you can see old, overgrown minge without thinking, 'Fuck it, I'm not that bad'
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:45, Reply)

^This
It was a bit embarrasing when I had my nips peirced though.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 14:48, Reply)