Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Good morning internets.It's been a while since I started a thread, so I'm not sure of the correct etiquette anymore.
I just wanted to say hello.
Edited for TGB
Daddy, chips or Vag?
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:18,
117 replies,
latest was 16 years ago)
Things is good.I'm not working til tonight so have a wonderful day of flomping about in front of me.
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:23,
Reply)
Damn it!I can't even try the "yeah but when you get to work I get to go and get pissed" thing because so do you.
What the hell are you doing up this early?
(, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:38, Reply)
Where's the question!!*snogs*
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:22,
Reply)
I put one up for you.I was going to write a bitty about townsfolk revolting in your vagina after a noticed was pinned to the vaginal cathedral door, but I couldn't be bothered.
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:27,
Reply)
That would be a liemy townsfolk are very happy in Monstvagopolis
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:29,
Reply)
Aw there there, I was only joking, I'm sure you have a lovely minge.(, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:39, Reply)
Yours is pretty darn lovely too(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:42,
Reply)
Morning LustyStill randomly getting attacked by strangers for your hair?
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:26,
Reply)
Oof, I don't envy thatAside from that, how are we?
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:30,
Reply)
Very well,drinking tea and chain smoking out of the kitchen window.
Later I have to go to Argos, tis a thrilling life indeed.
Yourself?
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:32,
Reply)
Not too bad, had a decent laugh last nightGot a not too enjoyable phone call to make at lunchtime, I have to get a few details off my landlord, so I can apply for housing benefits. If I don't get those, I'll be homeless by this time next month.
Aside from that, I'm not too bad, as I have a large bag of Galaxy Minstrels, NOM! Want one?
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:42,
Reply)
Oh dear. I hope it works out.I'll pass on the chocolate thanks. Never been much of a chocolate fan, with the exception being a KitKat Chunky.
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:50,
Reply)
The Kitkat Chunky is fairly magnificent, so I'll let you off!(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:05,
Reply)
I don't like chips*waits for the tide of wot u no likely chippychips*
I will very occassionaly eat proper chunky homemade ones if I'm out but I never eat them at home.
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:32,
Reply)
Chippy Chips = GodlyHomemade chips = Pretty fooking fantastic
McCains = Average
Micro Chips = Shite
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:42,
Reply)
Curly Fries = Bestest variety of chip ever.(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:46,
Reply)
Sorry, they are 2ndThe winner of that category is the waffle
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:46,
Reply)
The waffle is not a chip!!!Completely different category of potato based snack. You may as well say the best chip is a crisp! pah. French fries are the best easy. With mayonnaise and salt.
Edit - not entirely sure why I got so heated about chips. I think this diet is making me insane.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:48,
Reply)
Mayonnaise? Get out.And the waffle is the best potato derivative behind Chips, which are clearly sub-par when compared to roasties.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:06,
Reply)
You sir,are mental. I would have a whole other category for roasties. Waffles would be miscellanious and roasties would be under potato not chip/fry.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:08,
Reply)
It goes1. Roasties
2. Jackets
3. Sautees
4. Dauphinoise
5. Stovies
6. Wedges
7. yawn.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:12,
Reply)
What in the name of greek buggery is a Stovie?(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:16,
Reply)
If I was the high-fiving type I would be high-fiving you RIGHT NOW.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:20,
Reply)
I hate it when you do that.(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:25,
Reply)
The best chips I ever had was when I was about 12 and we spent every evening of the summer going to the local Chinese chippy.I can still remember their chips now. Big and thick, all crispy on the outside and fluffy in the middle.
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girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:08,
Reply)
My friend Hamishwas chased out of his local Chinese in Aylesbury when he was about ten, because some older boys made him go in and ask for 'Bruce Lee on toast'.
For some reason I think this is one of the funniest tales ever. I think it's the 'on toast' bit.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:14,
Reply)
Of course, because you would never get toast from a chippy.(
girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:15,
Reply)
prawn toast(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:16,
Reply)
I think the word chinese confused me. Do you get Chinese chippies?(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:25,
Reply)
You can get chippies run by chinese.You can also get chinese takeaways that supply fish and chips etc.
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girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:27,
Reply)
I don't like chips either.Occasionally I will walk past a chip shop and am seduced by the aroma only to find myself disappointed once again, when I realise I have purchased a large bag of potatoes as a snack.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:46,
Reply)
We are so perfect for each other Monty(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:49,
Reply)
Star-crossed chip-haters, we are.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:56,
Reply)
Oh God, it's starting all over againVicious circle, which incidentally is another term for TGB's vag.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:57,
Reply)
that and 'the Pink Hole of Calcutta'EDIT sorry, that's incredibly coarse.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:02,
Reply)
You could probably fit the whole of Calcutta inside(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:04,
Reply)
LUSSSSSSSTYYYYYYYHave you moved?
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:41,
Reply)
Yups.It's not as much of a shithole as first thought. Which is nice.
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:45,
Reply)
No.I'm useless.
Tomorrow night I am being sensible and staying in, so I will then.
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:52,
Reply)
LIES!You will accidentally ruin yourself with gin and end up having shenanigans, as you well know.
(, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:54, Reply)
I miss shenanigansmy life is properly dull and shit *cries again*
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:55,
Reply)
Aw.I intend to get so hammered tonight that I will be unable to see for the rest of the weekend.
(, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:00, Reply)
how will you watch the grand prix?shall I phone you and describe what is happening?
nothing...yamamoto lapped...nothing...yamamoto lapped...nothing... yamamoto crashed...
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:03,
Reply)
"All the wheels have come off Senna's car so he's kicked a hole in the floor and is running it around the track, Flinstones style, and yes he's just lapped Yamamoto again..."(, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:06, Reply)
Come see me whenever you want.I'll treat you like a right little darlin.
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:07,
Reply)
I bet you willand you'll make me all naughty
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:09,
Reply)
*grins*You love the naughty
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:11,
Reply)
I think you'll find that it's actually you who makes me naughty.I have to go now. I want toast.
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:12,
Reply)
Only if I don't have to pay for the gin.I'm trying to think how to word 'maybe I should hang around the bus stop and see if anyone wants to take me to the pub' without sounding like a slag.
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wanderlust, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:57,
Reply)
I can't even be bothered to strikethrough that.Although I will be impressed if you can manage it without acting like a slag.
(, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:02, Reply)
Mornin' Lustyface!(and morning all)
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:42,
Reply)
fuck off you cuntI'm still angry at you
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:43,
Reply)
Is it the story about you and Vipros I posted yesterday?(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:51,
Reply)
I told you that in confidenceand you blabbed it all over the internet
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:52,
Reply)
The NDA you made me sign had expired(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:56,
Reply)
The one where Vipros was singing along to the Cheeky Girlsand TGB touched his bum and he got all outraged because he was just singing along, it wasn't actually an invitation?
(, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:53, Reply)
I was saving that for another time(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:55,
Reply)
Hahaha he does like the Cheeky Girls A LOT, doesn't he?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:57,
Reply)
When he found out one of them was banging that MPHe had a proper spazzy flip.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:58,
Reply)
I love how he looked like a concentration-camp Brian Blessed as he furiously bellowed "LEEEMBIIIIIIT!!!" at the heavens.(, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:03, Reply)
Orright'Ow am yow?
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:09,
Reply)
I've started the book you gave me.It's rather good.
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girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:10,
Reply)
EeeeexcellentI might pick up a few more copies to give out as presents.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:15,
Reply)
Eh up Lustville!I dreamt it was the end of the world or something last night.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:25,
Reply)
Seriously, like all the RAF planes were flying to Cumbria (I dunno why)And the army barricaded us into a big branch of HSBC and I wanted to find my loved ones, but I was with a bloke I work with and I felt bad leaving him because his son's dead, so I said he could come with me but he slowed me down. Then he disappeared and I was locked in the HSBC and I worried I'd get rapified.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:28,
Reply)
The amount of armaggedon type books I read, I'm surprised I don't get more dreams like that.Last night I dreamt about not being able to find something to wear and then I kept going to the toilet so I woke up wanting to pee.
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girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:30,
Reply)
I hate those dreamsEvery time I need a piss in a dream, the toilets are always incredibly manky, full, and offer no privacy. THAT'S a nightmare.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:41,
Reply)
it was a bit like threadsThe nukes were on their way, that was the implication anyway
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:38,
Reply)
Sounds like an awesome dream!(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:28,
Reply)
Well you can have all my nightmares from now on(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:30,
Reply)
If they're all like the one you describedThen gladly!
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:39,
Reply)
You need to start controlling them a bitStart arming yourself in the dreams.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:42,
Reply)
Very occasionally I can realise that I'm dreamingMost of the time though, in my nightmares, I'm being chased, or my teeth are falling out, or I have to pee in a skanky public loo.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:46,
Reply)
I don't want those dreams in the first placeI'd like to control it so I don't have them.
I only like the ones where I'm having sex or I'm flying or I'm Debbie Harry.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:48,
Reply)
I haven't had a sex dream in AGESAnd the last one I remember was disappointing, the sex was purely mechanical and I didn't feel a thing.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:50,
Reply)
I did have one the other day where I woke up before the best bitBut it was good while it lasted
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:51,
Reply)
Was DJTP lying next to youGrinning in his sleep and prodding you in the back?
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:54,
Reply)
Poor Rootatron :(Are you gonna see him soon, like?
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:58,
Reply)
No dude.Not until his sis's wedding, which is almost three weeks away.
But then we get to spend a whole week together and go on holiday too.
After a whole week in my company I reckons he'll give me the elbow.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:02,
Reply)
Or you himHe'd be daft to kick you t'up kerb. Of course, I've never met you, maybe you've got some intensely annoying habits, like eating with your mouth open, or saying "pacifically", or your nose whistles when you breathe.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:05,
Reply)
No but I am flatulentand I'll wager I've done it in my sleep and disgusted him.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:07,
Reply)
God my Lady is the sameLike, all the time. She got stranded in town after she was let out of work late yesterday, so I drove her home (was having an evening to myself). As she thanked me and got out to leave, she paused, and leaned in to kiss me goodbye. Or so I thought, actually she farted, laughed, got out and slammed the door, trapping me inside.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:12,
Reply)
I wouldn't do that to himI do it to everyone else. But I try not to fart around him.
I like to jump onto my dad's lap, let one rip, then run away.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:13,
Reply)
Hahaha! I like how childish that is.The Lady was good for the first month, now she doesn't even try to hide it. Me, I leave the room if I feel a bad one coming on, it's the decent thing to do.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:17,
Reply)
You know calling her "The Lady"makes you both sound like pompous twats
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:20,
Reply)
You know I'm a pompous twat thoughI also call her "The missus", does that rile you too? I hope so.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:22,
Reply)
Doesn't rile me at allIt riles me when people consistently ditch their so called friends for their other half who they see at least every other day, but people being pompous twats doesn't. Which is why I do actually get on with Vipros
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:29,
Reply)
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