Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
« Go Back | Popular
My mrs gets the results of her exam to be a chartered structural engineer any minute nowit's by far the hardest (7 hours of structural design) and most strictly marked exam I'm aware of (40% pass rate), and as such I'm shitting it on her behalf.
Anyone else experiencing vicarious stress?
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:40,
178 replies,
latest was 16 years ago)
I was worried your mum had got pregnantbecause I assumed she was too old to have kids anymore and didn't use a condom.
She wasn't in the end. Which is just as well as I would have hated to give a kid AIDS too.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:48, Reply)
that's fair enoughI'd be worried too
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:49,
Reply)
Nope, not that stressed.Have to deal with estate agents tomorrow though so that'll stress me out but not tonight.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:48, Reply)
is that resolving your house situation?or moving on somewhere new?
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:49,
Reply)
Really?I'm going there in September (Oyster Festival) and October (canal barge trip)
I'm looking forward to both of them.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:55, Reply)
up her arse(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:18,
Reply)
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:22,
Reply)
-(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:27,
Reply)
I didn't tell you how to do strikethroughs so you could call me a rapist.Stop copying the retards no one's impressed.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:39, Reply)
well I am still practising and as it's b3taEVERYONE IS FAIR GAME.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:42,
Reply)
Congratulations - you have just earned a place in'Andy's top b3tans corner'
Await your prize in the post.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:45,
Reply)
nah it's like a domesticthey're throwing things at each other and hating, then you're the policeman who comes in, and suddenly she'll back in his arms, throwing abuse at you
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:50,
Reply)
everyday this placeseems to throw up a new rule or caveat which make me a dick. I hope one day this will pass and I will be accepted. Until then I will just get used to the nonsense.
edit - it's bloody funny though.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:52,
Reply)
they aren't newthe day it passes is the day you stop being a dick ;-)
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:55,
Reply)
we're in for a long waitit's pretty much hard wired I'm afraid
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:59,
Reply)
No wayI'm fed up of Chompy. Iz neva gettin bak wiv im.
(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:54,
Reply)
It's true, I sent her as close to an apology gaz as I can doand she hasn't replied.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:55, Reply)
penis with sorry written on it?(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:56,
Reply)
'I'm soz babezwil neva hit u agin. Kal the fuz orf"
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:57,
Reply)
You sent "You do know I was just joking""I didn't just put it up afterwards".
That is a lovely apology.
You're reminding me of Bert, you schizo.
Find someone else to poke, Chomp. I mean it.
I can't be arsed.
(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 16:00,
Reply)
My tenants are about to sign the lease on TuesdayI will be a Land Baron once more.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:15,
Reply)
Realised I should be doing thesis workbut have none of the books or journals I need.
Plus just to add an edge, I did some lawnmowing and now my hands are killing me
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:50,
Reply)
aren't all those books that guy lent you at your house in ireland?(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:51,
Reply)
yesbut his area is south-east asia, and general history. He doesn't have many Roman books
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:52,
Reply)
that's no use then(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:55,
Reply)
it came in usefulfor a couple of other modules, but I've picked a useless thesis subject that I can't get out of now
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:02,
Reply)
probably have been less painfulthe vibrations from the handle have set off the sensitive nerve endings in my hands
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:53,
Reply)
thankshopefully it'll die down soon
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:01,
Reply)
I just got chartered as a Chemical EngineerIt was hard, but the interview was a lot easier than that exam you explain.
I'm organizing a wedding with my fianceé living 275miles away in a place that is around 2000 miles away, with my mother calling me every day. What do you think?
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:53, Reply)
I don't think it is vicariousstressful yes, but it's yours, not someone elses
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:56,
Reply)
NONE OF DEEZ BITCHES 'CEPT AL BE KNOWIN WHUT VICARIOUS MEENZ(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:57,
Reply)
Ah, I seeWell, I have to cope with my mum's stress about me getting married. That is very vicarious, as she calls me everyday to tell me how stressed she is with the preparations.
Better?
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:58, Reply)
that must be annoyingwe're lucky that our parents aren't much interested in the organisation of our wedding
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:00,
Reply)
My mother isSometimes that is good, as it means I can go almost stress free until she forces us to make a choice. The downside are her phone calls. A small price to pay for not having to organize it myself.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:02, Reply)
I ain't got vicarious stressI got my OWN bleedin stress.
I should go and get this work done...
(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:54,
Reply)
Now this makes senseNow it does... vicarious... it sounds like vicar in Spanish.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:04, Reply)
hahaThe Vicario won't do my marigio because I turned up late-io.
That's how scousers 'speak Spanish'
(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:06,
Reply)
I was saying Olé!(au lait)
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:14,
Reply)
she's passedthank fuck
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:56,
Reply)
excellentcongratulations to her
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:00,
Reply)
YAY!I actually got a little tiny feeling of elation on her behalf then. I'm so benevolent.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:03,
Reply)
Woohoo!Taking her out to celebrate tonight?
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:07,
Reply)
taking her to band practice and getting her spliffed right upwe're going out tomorrow night (to a gourmet sausage restaurant) then getting on the booze.
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:08,
Reply)
damn straightexetersausageandgrill.com/
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:16,
Reply)
when you're in Bristol nexttry the Clifton Sausage, sounds gay but the best toad in the hole ever.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:19,
Reply)
my mate lives in cliftonso chances are high that I'll be able to do this
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:20,
Reply)
Good manReport back.
edit - and well done Mrs Smug for her exam results too.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:22,
Reply)
I'll be up there in September as wellhad a great curry from a place in clifton. fucked if I know what it was called though.
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:29,
Reply)
well gaz me before you come up as would be cool to meetyou for a beer or cider before you go out proper with your real life friends. I won't touch or rape you.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:33,
Reply)
I'll be up for a work thingand staying with my mate, who will also be at the work thing. So I'd have some defence.
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:37,
Reply)
Good manGive her a congratulatory high-five from me too.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:12,
Reply)
already havealthough that is mostly for her birthday
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:15,
Reply)
I'm stressed about something stupidthe woman I replaced on maternity leave is coming back on Monday and I don't want her to boot me out of my desk because I have the best one in the office, but I reckon she'll just come back and demand that I move. I know this is silly, but it's right next to the window and no one can see my screen and all my cupboards are within reaching distance. Grrr.
I'm a little bit stressed about the next piece of coursework I have to hand in as well because the guy has failed me twice on it so I just feel like I can't do it now. I did get two other pieces back yesterday with 85% and 100% on different subjects though so that was encouraging.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 14:59,
Reply)
85 and 100% are significantly better marks than I ever got for anything(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:01,
Reply)
you wouldn't like it harder(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:04,
Reply)
"it's a bit like shoving a pineapple into an anchovy arse, spikey end first"(
Lisette von Falcon, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:12,
Reply)
Are you saying Kitty's arse smells of fish?(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:12,
Reply)
woah K Swiss, thought you had my backand now this? I'm hurt, sis, hurt.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:14,
Reply)
it's him you should be angry withI was trying to play off your vipros smash
but I see how it is
that's fine
*sulks off*
(
Lisette von Falcon, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:51,
Reply)
they can't grade what they can't remember(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:04,
Reply)
depends on what "relaxant" I'm employing at the time(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:05,
Reply)
No, it depends if you're grasping a vibrator between your thighsin a desperate attempt to pretend your penis can reach inside her.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:10, Reply)
just makes me think that they must be being lenient.Although I thought my history tutor was lenient until I read the college forum and loads of people said she failed them.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:05,
Reply)
get in extra early and just make yourself busy as fucktoo busy to waste time moving for some work shy skank who spent 9 months off to play with kids.Selfish cow should be grateful she has a job to come back to, sit her in the cupboard in the dark so she can think about what she did.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:02,
Reply)
It's not serious Chompy - do I need to put a disclaimer on(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:08,
Reply)
you should put one on your face(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:09,
Reply)
I feel like I need one at the momentit's quite a lot to take in, Chompy, Bert, and being misunderstood. That was a bit too emo even for me. MTFU ac, MTFU!!
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:11,
Reply)
It does bug me a little how much new mothers get nowshe's had a year off and she gets to come back to 33 accumulated holidays, plus flexitime that none of the rest of us get, plus she will undoubtedly have numerous baby-related crises of "I need to go and pick her up from nursery, she's sneezed".
It's mainly the desk thing though, I like my desk. It's got my tiny army of origami post-it cranes on it.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:11,
Reply)
My sister in law has done it and is doing it againI get the whole wanting to have kids stuff but a year is a long time, 6 months full pay, 6 months half.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:16,
Reply)
hows your new book going Bert?(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:25,
Reply)
Have read a whole two pages last nightthen I went out and played xbox with Norm. I have the day off tomorrow and intend to read it then as Dance Dance Dance arrived today.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:30,
Reply)
I thought it was 9 months fullwith an additional 3 months unpaid where the company has to keep your job open.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:47,
Reply)
not sure I know hers was 6 months full, 6 months half last timeI assumed the same for this.
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:54,
Reply)
wrap a used sanitary towel up in its wrapper and leave it on your deskshe probably won't want your desk then, but if she does, say 'but this could have been MY BABY' and start crying
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:16, Reply)
For fucks sakeIf you had read the backstory you would know that Kitty once had an abortion on her office desk and is therefore a little sensitive about such things. Maybe you should consider that before mouthing off like a cunt.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:26, Reply)
It's trueright next to the post-its. It was an awful mess.
You insensitive bastard!
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:49,
Reply)
Right, what you need to do is this:1. Leave printouts of the latest infant-death statistics on her desk.
2. If you have access to her account, leave Google searches for "shaken baby syndrome" on the screen.
3. Stretch a condom over her phone receiver.
4. Make fake blood out of red food colouring and syrup, bite a few small chunks out of a marshmallow, stick the marshmallow on an untwisted wire coathanger, dip the marshmallow in the fake blood mix and leave the resultant drippy contraption in her pen holder.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:16,
Reply)
I like to think of it as 'touched'(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:27,
Reply)
^This^Possession is nine points of the law. Or something like that.
(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:09,
Reply)
I've arranged everything on her desk ready for her return and I've moved the shelves so they're within reach of the deskand I've made sure there's loads of space to get around her desk (she's a bit large), with only a little gap for me to get to my desk in the hope of making her desk look super appetising and mine look all cramped and miserable.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:13,
Reply)
Tell her to fuck offOr preferably get someone else to do it. 'Her desk', bollocks, what does she think it is, Primary School? She's a grown woman ffs, she has shat a baby out her fanny and everything.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 16:14, Reply)
i had an analytical techniques resit on tuesday, i felt sicknot sure if i did well enough to pass
(
weaver., Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:09,
Reply)
I couldn't care less about any of this tripe if I triedI hate my job I am very likely to walk out in the next hour and as you are all in the blast range I hate you all too
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:15,
Reply)
If you do thatYou have to make your exit cooler than that air host who swore at a passenger, grabbed a beer, and slid down the emergency slide.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:19,
Reply)
impossibleunless an explosion and a helicopter are involved
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:21,
Reply)
Very trueBut she can at least try.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:23,
Reply)
how about I cut my boss it to little pieces and then post them around the world in the millions of fucking boxes I have lying around everywhere(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:24,
Reply)
If you can get the boxes sent to specific placesSo that the joining the coordinates spells out "I QUIT", then sure.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:26,
Reply)
I like that idea(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:28,
Reply)
She passed, you delirious ball of oblivion!How are you? I texteded you :(
(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:18,
Reply)
HahaOh yeah, just read it! :)
Aww thank you for the text, I can't check my phone at work so missed your message! :(
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:25, Reply)
Sort ofI'm back at work, but still walking like a robot... which would be cool if it didn't hurt so much... do'h!
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:30, Reply)
:-(glad you didn't bust yourself up irreperably
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:30,
Reply)
Cheers!I am also pleased about this. I managed to miss hitting all the important bits, like my brain and my fanny!
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:31, Reply)
Ooooooo, the idea of bouncing on your bits down an escalator is quite unpleasantI'm glad you're generally ok, apart from the ongoing hurtyness.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:35, Reply)
I want a copy of the security tape for fun times!Ta mr, I'm alright, got a ride in an ambulance and everything! Very exciting! :)
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:37, Reply)
Pffft!Glad to hear you're on the mend.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:37,
Reply)
committed rape?was angry?
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:30,
Reply)
cold, calculated rape is his usual MO(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:31,
Reply)
His face remains emotionlessHe doesn't even blink.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:32,
Reply)
Elijah Wood, Sin City(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:36,
Reply)
Is who I think of whenever I think of Chompy(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:37,
Reply)
That's cuterThrowing salt on Elijah Wood probably won't achieve much.
(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:43,
Reply)
It doesn't with Chompyit makes him froth and bitch and SPEAK HIS BRANES then say he was only kidding afterwards.
(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:45,
Reply)
There's the one your husband does.which is "attempted but failed due to being a big bumder"
I'm going to give him a big hug tonight.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:32, Reply)
I see!Bless 'im! :)
Ah yes, have fun tonight, and bring him back unharmed!
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:34, Reply)
No, I got on and off an escalator without injuring myself.*proud*
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:32, Reply)
:-PThey're dangerous, and not in a Michael Jackson way, although I have heard that they can suck small children!?
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:35, Reply)
*bows*Apparently spinal injuries makes me make funnies, as The Cars say - let the good times roll!
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:38, Reply)
I love you really .(you clumsy spastic)
I hope you're milking it for as much time off and sympathy you can get.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:36, Reply)
Cheers!Well I got two days out of it, so that was pretty good. Can't lift anything or put my arms above my head though, so I'm a bit special needs at the moment... well, more so than usual!
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:39, Reply)
I simply cannot believe that came from your innocent little fingers(
Lisette von Falcon, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:39,
Reply)
All the love has gone nowI'm just a twisted hurty ball of fear and loathing... and sweets.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:41, Reply)
corrected somebody?edit - before and after raping them
(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:31,
Reply)
"NO!""You mean YES!"
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 15:36,
Reply)
« Go Back | Reply To This »