New thread not about sweets or old ladies' minges.
What (if anything) would you like to know about me? I am not promising to answer.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:31, 320 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Which person on here thinks you like them but you actually don't?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:33, Reply)

Anyone on here who thinks I like them.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:33, Reply)

Should I apply for a job with a £30k pay rise that I'll never get?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:35, Reply)

Yes.
a) you might get it and surprise yourself
b) if you get to interview that will be a massive boost in itself and will also give you insight into what interviews for £35k* jobs are like


*HAHAHAHAHAHAH
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:36, Reply)

I think I'll suprise the three levels of managment I'll skip over more than I'd suprise myself.
The interview thing is interesting as well, I'd be interviewed by the board, so could be either a good or a bad thing depending how I come accross.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:41, Reply)

It's all experience, good or bad, which is surely beneficial for the future.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:43, Reply)

Nothing I can't access from the sex offenders register my friend.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:33, Reply)

Hmm
Your secret record shame - which song do you like that doesnt fit with the rest of your tastes?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:35, Reply)

'Green Door' or 'This Ole House' by Shakin' Stevens?
I also believe 'Tiger Feet' by Mud to one of the best singles of all time.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:38, Reply)

that's neat

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:49, Reply)

I always thought it was tiny feet.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:11, Reply)

I think you should start doing pole wearing enormous tiger or monster feet slippers

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:15, Reply)

I WANNA KNOW WHAT MINGE IS.... AND I WANT YOU TO SHOW ME !!!!!

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:37, Reply)

*shows minge*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:39, Reply)

I WANNA FEEL WHERE MINGE IS!!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:39, Reply)

IS THIS MINGE
THAT I'M FEELING
IS THIS THE MINGE
THAT I'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:41, Reply)

What is your recipe for Chimichurri?

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:39, Reply)

This one:
1 clove garlic
100 mL (2/5 cup) red onion, chopped
15 mL (1 Tbsp.) jalapeno pepper, seeds removed
250 mL (1 cup) fresh flat-leaf parsley
250 mL (1 cup) fresh coriander
125 mL (1/2 cup) fresh basil
80 mL (1/3 cup) vegetable oil
15 mL (1 tbsp) Selection white RED wine vinegar
Salt and pepper to taste

Preparation:

In a food processor, combine garlic, red onion, jalapeno pepper, herbs, vegetable oil and white wine vinegaR, add salt and pepper to taste. Reserve.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:42, Reply)

Thank you

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:44, Reply)

I will have that
thank you

how much would you douse your steak with?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:49, Reply)

Have a small bowl of it on the table
and just spoon a little on the bit you're about to eat.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:59, Reply)

do you tend to make a batch and keep it in the fridge or something?
I imagine it lasts a while

is it really better than a nice mustard?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:02, Reply)

Yup, keeps in a jar for months.
As a steak accompaniment I genuinely believe it does pip mustard at the post because it has the sharpness and heat of mustard, but with the addition of herby magic.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:18, Reply)

I look forward to trying it
can you recommend it with any other sort of meat?

A lamp chop for example?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:23, Reply)

Haven't tried it
but to be honest it'd be nice on toast.

It would be superb with sausages.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:40, Reply)

most things are
gravy on toast for example
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:41, Reply)

I have written 'floor cleaning buffer' on my notepad, but my handwriting makes fs look like ts, so I keep misreading it as 'floor cleaning butter' even though I know it says buffer
what's your favourite kind of animal?
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:40, Reply)

Beef-producing ones.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:44, Reply)

could you change that to cats please?

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:44, Reply)

I'm afraid not. For, you see, I cannot tell a lie...

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:46, Reply)

oh go on, I promise it'll be worth it

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:47, Reply)

What would you look like with short hair?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:40, Reply)

Ever seen me with my hair up, Samurai-style?
Like that but without the topknot.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:45, Reply)

No, it's always been sleek and flowing around your shoulders.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:46, Reply)

That's how I wear my hair everyday to work. Ooooo Monty we have something in common
*jumps up and down clapping hands* Like a right mong.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:46, Reply)

I wear my hair in a kind of topnot
when I tie it back. Mostly as I don't really like ponytails.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:47, Reply)

same here I hate ponytails on men (which I am one)
so I top knot it for work as down it's in my face too much.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:49, Reply)

My hair is around shoulder length when straightish
but is just above with the wave/curls. Hence I have only a stubby ponytail, and it looks better in a knot/bun then just flapping along.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:50, Reply)

I have the half wavy half curly issue to
Did you ever see the Monkey of Death in the Mighty Boosh. I have his problem.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:56, Reply)

What, that your brother is Noel Fielding?

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:57, Reply)

No, the King of Ape Hell was the guy who played Bob Fossil

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:58, Reply)

Ah, I suspected I was mistaken
It is a long time since I saw that one
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:59, Reply)

Rich Fulcher I think
known as Felcher to his friends
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)

I quite like him.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:58, Reply)

Oh yes I remember him
That is the best episode. And I guess that's not saying much.

I'm interested in the personifications of Death, ok?!

My hair used to be proper ringlets. It's just falling out now.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:58, Reply)

Are you turning into a goth?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:59, Reply)

I hate cats

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

I can see why you think I'm your best bet Bert but not interested fella.
Ignore *click*
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:55, Reply)

Shut up Bert

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:02, Reply)

If I put a gun to the head of someone you loved
and asked you to listen to one David Bowie song or I'll pull the trigger which David Bowie song would you choose and why?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:42, Reply)

'Rebel Rebel': it's a fair Stones pastiche.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:45, Reply)

I used to play that in a covers band and subsequently it now gets skipped.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:47, Reply)

I'd have thought
Under Pressure with Freddie Mercury would have been a good one, since it's only 50% Bowie.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:47, Reply)

or simply
the shortest one
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:48, Reply)

-lights fuse-
-puts fingers in ears-
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:46, Reply)

Oh dear.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:50, Reply)

i'msorryi'msorryi'msorry

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

Have you seen this?
www.b3ta.com/links/515310
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:17, Reply)

hahahahahahahahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 18:00, Reply)

What is your name?
What is your quest?....

What is your favourite colour?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:44, Reply)

1. Montgomery Peregrine St John Boyce
2. To rid the world of idiocy (or at least to have a jolly good time trying)
3. I don't have one
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

1. Winner of the most awesome name 2010
2. Good luck.
3. Really?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:57, Reply)

Yes, really.
I like several colours equally - does this make me odd?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:01, Reply)

Ah right,
I thought you meant you don't like colours. Or something.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:05, Reply)

Not quite, dear
It's coloureds that he doesn't like
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:08, Reply)

Ohhhhh I get you.
That makes much more sense.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:11, Reply)

What do you look like?

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:50, Reply)

A 1970s roadie.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:52, Reply)

I read that in the tone of an exasperated mother.
"Oh Monty, WHAT do you look like?"

EDIT - I nearly added "Have you been tearing the sleeves off your Hawkwind t-shirts to try and look like a roadie again? You KNOW that just makes you look like an idiot." Then I saw Monty's reply, and back in it goes.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:52, Reply)

It was a Ramones shirt,
and it came without sleeves, ye cheeky little cont, ye.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:55, Reply)

Imagine King Charles I
After three months on tour with The Pink Fairies
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:54, Reply)

In my head
I picture Monty to look like Sir Digby Chicken Ceaser from the Mitchell and Webb look.

pds8.egloos.com/pds/200802/17/83/f0004183_47b839f59adb2.png
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)

Ginger! Quick, here comes my nnnemmmesssisss!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:04, Reply)

I honestly think Mitchell and Webb are fantastic. I just saw their Sherlock Holmes alzheimers
sketch which is hilarious and quite moving.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:06, Reply)

I was moved by that sketch
it wasn't really comedy though.

edit: also "There"?

you spastic
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:07, Reply)

I found myself laughing and then being really sad at the end
when he said. "Watson, I know"

Re edit - I know I know!
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:10, Reply)

I think that was the point of it,
you shouldn't be laughing at people with dementia.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:14, Reply)

Unless they are Terry Pratchett.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Hahahah

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:27, Reply)

further proof that they are easily the best comedians around at the moment, if not ever

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:23, Reply)

At the moment.
Ever: Fry & Laurie. Peter Cook is the funniest man who ever lived, though.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:27, Reply)

I feel let down by Hugh Laurie of late
loads of people bang on about House, but I don't approve of it. Don't care that he is making money, it's just that accent.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:29, Reply)

Fry and Laurie
are exponentially better than Mitchell and Webb, who can be funny and also quite boring
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:30, Reply)

you've got to admit that Mitchell and Webb are leagues ahead of all of their contemporaries though

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:37, Reply)

as a comedy duo perhaps
simply because I can't think offhand of any better current ones. But I still don't find them that good
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:42, Reply)

their writing is a cut above
the satirical sketches recently about the faked moon landing conspiracy and the diana conspiracy alone bump them to the top of the list.

I suspect you just don't get their comedy and the Catherine Tate Show and Gavin and Stacey are more your level.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:45, Reply)

I feel sick now
you're far too cruel Vipros.

I cannot stand Gavin and Stacey or the Catherine Tate Show. I find both of them nauseating, and James Cordon makes me want to committ GBH.

I suspect your praise is covering a deepseated love of The Horne and Cordon Show
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:52, Reply)

sorry
I thought that might be pushing it a bit ;-)

Gavin and Stacey make me want to cut myself, then others, then myself again, then a few more others, then myself, then pretty much everyone else
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:04, Reply)

My room-mate last year
loved Gavin and Stacey. I'd never seen it so I bought her the first and second series on DVD for her birthday, and watched one or two with her. Actually made me nauseous. What I couldn't understand was that whenever she was ill/down she'd watch them again and again.

I'd rather watch paint dry.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:07, Reply)

Couldn't agree more
Sadowitz holds the title for funniest cunt alive though.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:51, Reply)

He's probably got that on his business card.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:31, Reply)

yes!

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:06, Reply)

He has an innocent face.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:02, Reply)

The world's customs officials do not agree.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:45, Reply)

for the love of god
why?!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

The voices told me to.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:52, Reply)

who put the cunt in Scunthorpe?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

Ian Botham
www.scunthorpeuk.com/famous_people.php?f=Scunthorpe
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:54, Reply)

I don't know,
but if it turns out to be the same person who put the bomp in the bomp bah bomp bah bomp there’s going to be fucking TROUBLE.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:54, Reply)

apparantly Rupert Murdoch
/Private Eye
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:01, Reply)

What's your favourite sweet to eat out of an old ladies' minge?

( Peej, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

Pickled onion flavour flumps.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:57, Reply)

The amusing part is that they weren't pickled onion flavour when they went in.

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:07, Reply)

What is your favourite film?
and, in true OT style, Alt Q - what is your favourite "mainstream" film? I don't just mean something we'll all have heard of - something that's done serious business at the box office, if you please
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:53, Reply)

Performance.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:57, Reply)

Two (albeit tenuous) admissions of admiration for the Rolling Stones on one page
Is that your answer to both? Because I'm not sure Performance even meets the "something we've all heard of" criteria. Just say Bad Boys II. You know you want to.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:59, Reply)

More likely to be "Rita, Sue and Bob too"

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:02, Reply)

Or "National Lampoon's Vegas Vacation"

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)

European Vacation is a masterpiece.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:04, Reply)

I rather enjoyed the christmas one
Though I found the Las Vegas one a bit tired and predictable - the redneck cousin still makes me laugh though.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:09, Reply)

school reunion was great

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:17, Reply)

But Animal House was the daddy

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:20, Reply)

My father's favourite film.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:26, Reply)

That film is solely responsible for me once asking my then-girlfriend if she fancied a "jump"
At first she was puzzled. And latterly unappreciative
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:04, Reply)

"we're havin' a gang bang"...

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:06, Reply)

Best film quote ever: "When we have sex, it feels like shagging a bag of spuds - you lay there like a bit of wet rag".

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:09, Reply)

or Point Break

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:02, Reply)

Point Break is fucking brilliant

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)

shh we know that
I'll take a bet Monty doesn't. And Darth probably prefers Bad Boys II
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:06, Reply)

Amberl, please
You of all people should know me well enough to know better. Point Break is MUCH more homoerotic than Bad Boys II
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:10, Reply)

neither are as sexy as Top Gun

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:11, Reply)

it's a toss-up between them
but I'd probably choose Point Break. Actually it's too difficult to choose

*Awaits obvious strikethrough*
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:16, Reply)

up off
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:20, Reply)

it's a toss-up between them
but I'd probably choose Point Break. Actually it's too difficult to choose

*Awaits obvious strikethrough*
I've got massive tits!
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Aha
gently without chafing
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Where was gently in the original post?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:24, Reply)

in her sig

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:25, Reply)

Sig

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:25, Reply)

In her sig
I was trying to make the strikethrough as un-obvious as possible

EDIT: Not THAT un-obvious, it would appear
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:27, Reply)

Well it didn't make much sense if that helps.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:27, Reply)

you un-obvious!!
nahhhhhhhh mate.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:28, Reply)

I wish I could resent that with any conviction

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:33, Reply)

but that doesn't make much sense :(

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:28, Reply)

I caught my first tube today... Sir.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:08, Reply)

Back off Warchild, seriously.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:10, Reply)

Would you still be saying that if it didn't have surfing in it?
I think not. The acting was more wooden than a 1940's surfboard.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:16, Reply)

keanu reeves is perhaps
but Swayze, Busey, Lori Petty etc. are all quite good

it's got some great lines, so good action sequences. Singer from RHCP shooting himself through the foot. What's not to like?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)

Its far too long.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:24, Reply)

That's what she said

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:27, Reply)

Time Bandits.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)

Alright, new question;
what is it with you and Dwarves?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:05, Reply)

My brother's influence.
I just love the cheeky little fellows.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:07, Reply)

You blamed your love of AC/DC on him as well
I suppose climate change, British Rail and Michael McIntyre are his fault too
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:11, Reply)

No, that's 'The Jews'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:19, Reply)

Interesting that your persecution of minorities doesn't extend to those who'd be easiest to round up and imprison
Think of the space you could save if your concentration camps were for Dwarves. You could build a Quidditch pitch on the remainder of the grounds
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:24, Reply)

*takes notes*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:26, Reply)

I was about to guess Daddy Day Camp or Howard the Duck

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:05, Reply)

Time Arse
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:14, Reply)

Grudging LOL here

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:25, Reply)

Time Bum
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:53, Reply)

Do you mind that your father is deeply disappointed with you,
and your chronic underachieving?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:00, Reply)

Yes, I really do.
Not a day goes by that I don't feel the eyes of my illustrious forebears glaring down at me in disapproval.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:02, Reply)

Mine too, and they aren't that illustrious.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:04, Reply)

Where are they hidden?

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:01, Reply)

Have you tried down the back of the sofa?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)

Many times, but it just doesn't grip as well as a real cervix
Now where are they hidden?
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:04, Reply)

This is you.
AICMFP.
b3ta.com/questions/pantsonfire/post825839
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:09, Reply)

Good lord...
Has anyone got that Picard facepalm to hand?
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:11, Reply)

I've heard that story or similar stories before.
I'm saying it's an urban myth.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:12, Reply)

Agree.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:14, Reply)

Cromwell Street, Gloucester
I still can't believe my neighbour Fred got the blame. They never found all of them, believe me.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:21, Reply)

*sobs*
*sighs*
...do you think she'll still be...warm?
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:26, Reply)

'she'....?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:38, Reply)

What is the meaning of life?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:10, Reply)

There is none

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:15, Reply)

from you that is a bit of a wild statement.
I would have said 'why does there need to be one?' rather than that.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:23, Reply)

they are both appropriate

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:34, Reply)

Have a good time without fucking everyone off in the process.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:24, Reply)

Every one of the cells that make your fantastically complex, eukaryotic body
contain an identical copy of a set of genes, and that copy desires only to replicate itself, that its form might continue. Plus, through the mechanism of sexual reproduction, it has the opportunity to enhance itself by combination with the genes of another, similar organism, and those benefits will hopefully be expressed in the resulting progeny.

Basically there's a strong argument for saying that you're just a vehicle for your genes, and all of your drives, instincts and emotions, and therefore probably the meaning of life itself, can be traced back to your DNA trying to improve its chances of surviving long enough that a suitable partner might spluff up your mimsy and propagate a combination of both your genotypes.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:25, Reply)

that's what all biological life is after thought isn't it?
That's what I just learnt at uni anyway. Competition and niches and what not all to ensure reproduction.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:26, Reply)

Yep.
And if you look at us quite pragmatically, we're not really that different.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:29, Reply)

HA HA
You're not that different from Bobby Pires!!! HA HA *points*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:32, Reply)

That means you aren't either dear

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:34, Reply)

Fuck off, that's bollocks.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:36, Reply)

I don't agree
that may be the base impulse, but the very fact that we can think about 'the meaning of life' puts us one cut above already. And if the genetic propagation theory was entirely true, then how come there are women and men who don't want children and indeed actively dislike them. Granted they automatically breed themselves out, but still it makes very little sense if it's written into our genes
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:33, Reply)

One cut above
only in that we've evolved one more tool to make sure we survive to reproduce.

Edit: but that doesn't really address your point. Which is a coincidence and an accident.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:41, Reply)

Ok
The fact that we have evolved to question the meaning of life and our own existence is, it's fair to say, something unique.

The other thing that we have achieved uniquely is to separate "sexual intercourse" and "the impulse to breed." We seek sex because it feels really really nice and makes us feel good and all that, but there's a good reason for that - if there's some sort of reward to bonking, then we're more likely to do it and therefore more likely to reproduce. Either way, you must agree that we're all still driven by a libido, albeit to different extents. What we have done differently is separated out the idea of sex purely for pleasure.

And at any rate, that base impulse is still pretty strong. Why have you dressed the way you have today - are you competing for the attention of the opposite sex? Why do you seek the comfort and security of friends - is this the same as pack acceptance and the protection from danger that comes with it? Why are your male colleagues more objectionable towards other men and more career-driven or money oriented, other than by some extension of displaying their suitability as a breeding partner?

Of course, there are things which are written into your genes which don't "make sense" from the point of view of successful reproduction. Not wanting children could be one, but then so is Huntingdon's Chorea. "Written in" is probably the wrong phrase to use, as it suggests some thought went into the genes you were lumbered with - of course, it's a fairly well randomised selection drawn from what your parents offered when they did the dirty, so some of the genes you get may prove advantageous to breeding, some may prove disadvantageous.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:44, Reply)

I like mine better

( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:45, Reply)

Yeah, I think yours gets to the point a bit quicker.

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:47, Reply)

I'm a cynic
rather than a scientist.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:50, Reply)

I'm both.

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:56, Reply)

tl:dr
I really wanted to, but it's ten to five.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:48, Reply)

It's basically what Kroney said, but with extra words

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:50, Reply)

I'm dressed for warmth
in jeans and t-shirt etc. And it doesn't make sense since there are other reasons for all the things you've mentioned. I seek out friends for decent conversation and fun, rather than warmth and security. Etc Etc. It simply doesn't make sense that every argument reduces what we think and feel down to basic animal emotion. Yes you can do it, but it's a massive oversimplification, and like Kroney doesn't really address the point of why
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:50, Reply)

You seek companionship
because you're a social animal. We're not predators like lions, we're opportunists like chimps. We have need of the same security a herd provides because of our hilarious lack of natural defences. We evolved intelligence as a means to defend ourselves and to hunt. Sentience was an accidental by-product.

Yes, there are more esoteric explanations, but they don't make sense from an evolutionary viewpoint.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:54, Reply)

I like mine better

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:56, Reply)

You know what?
So do I.

We should totally become an evolutionary tag team duo.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:58, Reply)

so you're taking a sort of Occams razor viewpoint
the simplest explanation is right?

I don't think it fits. Too many bits are missing, too many assumptions made, too many exceptions elbowed out of the equation
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:56, Reply)

Ok, and not meaning to be arsey about this, I'm just enjoying wading in the middle of the debate
But which bits are missing, which assumptions are being made, and which exceptions have been elbowed out?

I admit, you have to take some rather convoluted routes to explain some of the more 'human' aspects of emotion or behaviour in these terms, but I do believe it can be done.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:59, Reply)

Occam was a very clever man
You are more than entitled to have that opinion of course. I'm not enough of a scientist to convincingly argue otherwise on a message board.

The fact here is that we did evolve successfully to become the dominant species on this planet. We didn't do that because sentience was useful for naval gazing and questioning our existence.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:02, Reply)

Well, to take your counterexample
Aren't "decent conversation and fun" just extensions of "warmth and security"? I am, I admit, very cynical, but I don't think it is a gross oversimplification. Humans are possessed of a remarkable degree of intelligence, but I wouldn't put them on any pedestal that puts them above base drives.

As for this point of why - why what?
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:55, Reply)

I disagree
if you look at us simplistically maybe.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:34, Reply)

Simplistically, you can explain a lot of basic emotions from the need to reproduce
But I think you can extrapolate it to a lot of the more complex emotions if you work from the basic needs for food, shelter, social acceptance and, ultimately, sex.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:46, Reply)

You're using your subsequent arguments to back up your first statement.
We're very similar to all other life if you ignore all the differences, which is simplistic.
Anyway off home now.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:52, Reply)

Fuck's sakes there's a lot of discussion above for a question we all know the answer to
42
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:36, Reply)

He's dead, and his books weren't that good in the first place.
Get the fuck over it.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:37, Reply)

Even by your standards this is an unnecessarily aggressive response
I disagree with your second point although sadly there is no arguing with the first
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:39, Reply)

I see where's he coming from though
I liked the books. Not rabidly, but well enough, and I get bored of people proclaiming that 42 is the meaning of life and then looking all proud of themselves.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:41, Reply)

What are the chances of me looking proud of myself?
Ever?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:44, Reply)

that is irrelevant to this or any other discussion

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:46, Reply)

No it isn't
You made it apparent that people who give the response I gave above and look proud of themselves annoy you. I was illustrating that I am unlikely to have fulfilled the second half of the criteria

Oh, I SEE! You were riffing on my low self-esteem to ensure that I know my place and concede the argument! WELL done, you must be SO proud
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:51, Reply)

I'm not in the habit of using people's insecurities to win arguments.
what I was saying wasn't even aimed at you, but justifying my empathy for Chompy's point.

Frankly, I'm slightly offended that you think I've done what you've described in your post.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:00, Reply)

I don't really, it was meant to be a joke. Apparently not very well-delivered
I wouldn't believe you to be capable of such a thing, you're not Chompy or Bert. Apologies for offending you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:09, Reply)

probably my fault for not getting the delivery
it was only slight. One of the few things that annoys or upsets me is people who should know me better (not that you necessarily fall in that category) totally not being able to predict how I might act or respond to something.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:12, Reply)

Oh, that wasn't a turnabout-is-fair-play manoeuvre?
Then I retract my nice one. As it were.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:14, Reply)

Rest assured that if I ever felt you were acting in a manner I felt to be off
I would gaz you about it rather than having it out here, annoyingly your good opinion matters to me. I did wonder about that post as I entered it. That'll learn me
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:21, Reply)

Nice one Vippers.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:13, Reply)

Especially
given as he was poking fun at people who look for a meaning to life. As I understand it, he was an proponent of evolution and therefore pretty likely to be in the "there isn't one" camp.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:44, Reply)

*rapturous standing ovation*
Douglas Adams = Iron Maiden, Simpsons Tie, Pratchett.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:50, Reply)

nothing wrong with Iron Maiden

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:51, Reply)

Seconded
Just to let Monty get into his much-vaunted flow about why Bruce Dickinson is a twat
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:53, Reply)

especially since they're much better than AC/DC

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:57, Reply)

Substantially so
Have you heard the new album as yet?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:59, Reply)

I got it from my mate for my birthday
there's some filler, but on the whole it's good.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:01, Reply)

Don't hate me for this
But I'm not an Iron Maiden or AC/DC fan. Sure I like a few songs, but I can't sit through a whole album. I'm not much into the NWOBHM bands.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:03, Reply)

they're not for everyone
and not like Tool in that even if you don't like them you have to respect them
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:05, Reply)

Oh I certainly respect the likes of
Iron Maiden, Black Sabbathl, AC/DC, Motorhead etc.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:07, Reply)

I do love a bit of classic rock
But nowadays I'd rather listen to a whole album by VNV Nation or Combichrist and a couple of choice tracks by Maiden or Zeppelin. Ten years ago I'd have lynched my older self for such a statement
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:10, Reply)

what was that about respect?
No respect here
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:07, Reply)

go watch Catherine Tate
you have no place here
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:10, Reply)

fuck off back to Horne and Cordon
and take your Spice Girls tapes with you


Edit: that actually sounded quite angry for me. Sorry. Not been a great day
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:12, Reply)

I wouldn't have thought that was angry :-)
no angrier than your base level anyway
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:17, Reply)

I'm not angry very much haha
I think it's the asthma today, definitely given me a shorter temper
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:17, Reply)

watch fuck
Catherine Sharon
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:13, Reply)

I do have some standards Lab

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:18, Reply)

I haven't no
I've been wallowing
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:01, Reply)

I want to know something silly that you like doing
like jumping in puddles or pulling faces at blind people.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:13, Reply)

I like punching disabled children in the car park of Hackney Tesco.
The look on their parents' faces...honestly it's brilliant.

I'd never actually go into Tesco though, you understand.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)

What's your magic number?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:18, Reply)

I'm not giving you my phone number, you ghastly bender.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:23, Reply)

You know damn well what I mean
But avoiding that, having established your distaste for speed, what's your drug of choice?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:34, Reply)

DMT

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:36, Reply)

...that I might have taken also?
For the purposes of comparison of tastes
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:37, Reply)

Smoke some DMT and get back to me.
I do love a good smoke, but top-quality Peruvian* cocaine gets me very excited.

*It's less harsh in its effect than Colombian, but is the experts' choice
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:52, Reply)

Thank you for your feedback
White Widow is a highly popular (and difficult to obtain) smoke round these 'ere parts. Rumour has it that it's local, I figured you'd be the man to ask. Ever heard of it?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:56, Reply)

White Widow is a popular and established variety
plenty of it available in Amsterdam for example.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:02, Reply)

So I have been lied to by dealers
What a surprise. Obviously it's entirely likely that being Norwich-based dealers they're completely unaware of a world, or varieties of drugs, beyond Norfolk's borders
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:07, Reply)

that's quite a hefty claim for them to make
given that I'm not big on varieties and stuff, it's one of the few well established ones that I've heard of!

Fucking pokey stuff.

you might also hear rumours that it's dipped or sprayed with other drugs.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:08, Reply)

When I was but a young drugged-up whippersnapper
I met a guy at a party who claimed that his E's were cut with Acid and that was how he could justify charging £6 a pop. This persisted until someone who actually knew the first fucking thing about how Ecstasy is produced cut him down to size in a coke-fuelled rant of which I believe Monty would have been proud.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:12, Reply)

Hahah nice tale.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:15, Reply)

The sandblasting of bud by Vienamese gangsters is real.
Very bad news.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:14, Reply)

unfortunately
but I've heard white widow is dipped or coated in everything from acid to ketamine
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:16, Reply)

*shudders*
The idea that I might have unknowingly consumed anything remotely connected to Acid since my first and last trip in 1997 is horrific
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:17, Reply)

I once drank liquid LSD out of the bottle.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:27, Reply)

I very nearly clawed my eyes out in an attempt to un-see those words
I've repeatedly been told that it was "just" a bad tab, that the time and place were wrong for me to be doing my first trip, that with the right people I could really enjoy LSD. Everyone who's ever told me such things has been given phenomenally short shrift. Never again.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:35, Reply)

It's not for everyone, granted.
I am totally suited to heavy psychedelic usage, though. The more the merrier. I could tell you shit I've done that would horrify you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:53, Reply)

Another time, maybe
Sometimes I'm well up for hearing such tales and sometimes they chill me to my core. Also, am going home in four minutes. And DEFINITELY not after InFest, I'll be on a three-day comedown
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:56, Reply)

What do you do at gigs?
Stand there and nod your head? Or do you stumble around and crash into everyone?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)

I'm a head-nodder.
This has not always been the case, though.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:24, Reply)

What is your favourite bread/dough based product.
Who are your favourite three bassists?
(Cave Duck, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:26, Reply)

Lemmy, Entwistle......Mark King from Level 42
*tries valiantly to maintain straight face*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:30, Reply)

You mean to say you rate Mark King over Sting and "Macca"?

*struggling with straight face*
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:31, Reply)

How could I have forgotten Sir Thumsaloft of Ye Frogge Chorus?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:34, Reply)

in a serious list
would you include John Paul Jones?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:35, Reply)

In a top ten I would.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:52, Reply)

that's fair

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:02, Reply)

Bread question: I'm really not that bothered.
Freshly baked onion granary?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:33, Reply)

Oh, I thought Mark King was the answer to the dough based product question.

(Cave Duck, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:57, Reply)

His face makes me feel ill.
Like Michael York.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:59, Reply)

what's your favorite song to sing?

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:27, Reply)

I don't really have one.
When I'm pissing about on my guitar I often find myself singing 'Red House' by Jimi Hendrix.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:34, Reply)

do you have enough guitars that we will be able to jam when I eventually visit Boyce Towers
or will I need to bring one?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:36, Reply)

I have my Epiphone SG and that Tele I bought.
I also have a Westone Thunder 1A (for years my favourite guitar) but it's knackered - and being held hostage by my ex.

I'd need to borrow an extra amp but that's no problem at all. We could pop over to my mate from *that* band, and borrow his Fender Jazzmaster as well....
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:57, Reply)

Bender Jizzmaster?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:04, Reply)

Yes, how can I help you?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:06, Reply)

Oh, sorry, I meant the other one

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:08, Reply)

no way
I love those Westones. My mate has a Thunder IIA.

that sounds splendid though, and I look forward to that day
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:05, Reply)

Me too, old bean.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:30, Reply)

The Cure?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:05, Reply)

good timing
they've just been on my ipod
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:06, Reply)

Shame
They're shit.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:08, Reply)

That's my boy.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:22, Reply)

I only like 'A Forest' to any degree - that's genius.
'Lovecats' is in my 'most hated' songs top ten which has an adverse effect on my judgement of their other work
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:08, Reply)

I'm much more a fan of their dark stuff
Burn from the Crow soundtrack is good, and the album Disintegration.

I don't mind the other stuff, particularly as Mrs V is a massive fan. She and her sisters were The Cure style goths
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:09, Reply)

And here's the first wedding photo of V & Mrs V

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:12, Reply)

*shudder*
that is deeply disturbing
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:14, Reply)

Do they do the gothic two-step dance?
One guy who went to goth/ebm clubs in Manchester dances like he's swimming the breast-stroke while doing the two-step.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:12, Reply)

seeing as I don't know what you mean
I'm going to go with "no"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:15, Reply)

It's a dance goths do
Two steps forward, two back, with some mystical/ethereal/poncy arm waving.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:16, Reply)

Better than the "my boots are so excessive I can barely move my feet dance"
which consists of swaying slightly while scrabbling at invisible spider webs.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:18, Reply)

I can't wait for InFest
Thoroughly looking forward to seeing both in full effect
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:36, Reply)

F c
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 18:02, Reply)

^ THAT'S how to rock the strikethrough style, kids.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 18:05, Reply)

*trigger fingers*
and *belms*
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 18:07, Reply)

Hahah thankfully not.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:06, Reply)

How posh are you, in real life?

(Cave Duck, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:39, Reply)

On the outside, not awfully.
I've learned to keep my inner gentleman hidden, to enable me to proceed through life with the minimum of ripping-off and beating.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:58, Reply)

Let's get this over with
Who's your least favourite B3tan?

APART from me. And SpankyHanky.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 16:57, Reply)

Oooh, tough one - you're all such cunts.
Of all time, it's Bert Monkeysex who behaved appallingly towards me and others so many times that even though we eventually shook internet hands and avoided each other, as a human being I hold the fellow in frightfully dim regard.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:05, Reply)

It's very difficult to know who it's really fair to hate via the internet
I can never tell who's playing a character and who really is much the same IRL as they are online. I'm informed that Al is lovely in real life, for example.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:14, Reply)

That's a damned lie: he's a fucking cunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:18, Reply)

And that's why Monty likes him

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:20, Reply)

Seconded
I'm glad he's dead.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:20, Reply)

He's not on the list, anyway
Not that I've ever met a B3tan. For all I know this whole website might be a colossal practical joke
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:30, Reply)

HE'S ON TO US!
KITTEN SQUAD, GO GO GO!!!!
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:33, Reply)

I know you're not a real person
You're some kind of avatar for the Bristol Tourist Board
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:36, Reply)

Close...I don't work for the Bristol tourist board
but I am a 7ft tall blue cat-type-thing
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:49, Reply)

Fuck Off Cats!
Oops, sorry, wrong login...
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:50, Reply)

Magnificent.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:53, Reply)

Which b3tan would you most like to meet? (who you haven't met already?)
Also, what's your favourite story ever posted?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:02, Reply)

*crosses fingers and hopes*

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:07, Reply)

It's PenguinOfDeath.
Hands down.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:08, Reply)

+ my pants right now.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:09, Reply)

it's a good job I'm not sensitive

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:10, Reply)

Are you ribbed for extra pleasure?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:11, Reply)

ribbed AND dotted

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:12, Reply)

Woo and yay!
I don't care if it was sarcastic, and I'm ignoring Lab.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:12, Reply)

There are loads of you I'd like to meet.
You, Vipros, Christ it'd be easier to make a 'wouldn't like to meet' list (I'll gaz it to you).

Favourite story? Fuck knows. I kind of prefer the banter to the anecdotes on the whole.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:11, Reply)

it's too late to not meet me Monty

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:11, Reply)

Curses!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:17, Reply)

Sorry
I should have issued you with a written warning
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:18, Reply)

Yeah NOW you tell me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:28, Reply)

Much as I like learning things about you,
I'm a little concerned about why it's your This is Your Life.
Are you planning on leaving us?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:08, Reply)

Pearoast

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:09, Reply)

I like this
Possibly more than I like any of you.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:14, Reply)

Who knows when I may be recalled to the bosom of the Lord?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:18, Reply)

stop that talk

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 17:26, Reply)

Don't die before me.
I want you to lead the cortege at mine. It will have a glass sided, horse drawn hearse with a white wreath spelling "cunt" propped up against my coffin.

Say you'll do it, please.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 18:01, Reply)

Of course. You have two weeks in which to die, starting..........................





...............NOW!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 18:04, Reply)

Another pie, and I may not last that long.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 18:08, Reply)