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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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There's a lot of anger around today
Can't we all just get along?

if not, why not?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:16, 137 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
FUCK OFF YOU FUCKING BEARDY FUCKER

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:17, Reply)
Go away
and eat your 'Wagon Wheel, Hula Hoops, Dairylea triangle, satsuma, yoghurt but mum's run out of Clubs so I have to have a Viscount instead' child's lunch.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:21, Reply)
officelol

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
That is the perfect lunch.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
I wish I had a wagon wheel.
Mummy doesn't pack me chocolate she says I am enough of a fatty already.

I've smoked a lot since earlier so have calmed down calmed down
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:24, Reply)
cancerLOlz

(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
cancerLOlz -lolz

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:32, Reply)
have you fallen to the Communists?

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
Because we're all cunts.
Your advice please. My hair is now long enough for pigtails. Am I too old to be wearing them?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:17, Reply)
Never, I think you'd look even more super hawt

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:18, Reply)
*blushes*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:20, Reply)
No *harbours secret fetish*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:19, Reply)
Pics will be forwarded shortly.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:21, Reply)
*unzips in quivering anticipation*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
I may wear pigtails to the London bash.
See if I can get a bukkake party started.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:29, Reply)
from the number of replies
you'll be in luck
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:30, Reply)
:D

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
I really hope you do this
I love pigtails
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
I used to put my own hair in pigtails when it was long enough
then I'd take photos of the back of my head and wank over them
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
that has disturbed me more than you usually manage
I think it's because I believe it is true
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
*winks*
*trigger fingers*
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:40, Reply)
*coquettes*
oh sir!
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:41, Reply)
*croquettes*
oh working class meal accompaniment!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:45, Reply)
*croquet*
ooh an excellent summer game
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:46, Reply)
Croak-eh
/scouse frog
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:49, Reply)
*Crock-Ay!*
Monty saying hello.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:50, Reply)
It is the one game I approve of.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:51, Reply)
I fucking love croquet
when my family plays we always end up in a massive fight.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:58, Reply)
Last time I played it
was at a stately home in Devon where my family had gone for my father's 60th. I thrashed everyone and then threw up on the croquet lawn, following a rather extensive lunch.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:00, Reply)
good lad
were you dressed in tweed?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:01, Reply)
I was in a suit,
but sadly the tweed Goldfinger suit was (and even more sadly still is) stuck at the 'ideas stage'.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:05, Reply)
that's a crying shame

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:10, Reply)
good job you are all already holding mallets

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:00, Reply)
It's a good game
ideal for playing while drinking champagne
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:03, Reply)
We had an 8-course Michelin-starred meal
My father ad brother-in-law had chosen different wines for every single course. I was fucking stinking pissed.

I remember trying to wash the vomit away with a kettle of hot water - good thinking, I thought, until I went back the next morning to see a small patch of dead grass on an otherwise impeccable croquet lawn. A patch of dead grass with half-digested food all over it.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:08, Reply)
Oh. I thought it was specifically for my benefit.


*feels lonely and dejected*
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
I'll let you pull them.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:32, Reply)
+yourself off over

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:36, Reply)
*emergency trouser-change*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:36, Reply)
never too old for pigtails!
they'd look cute!
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:20, Reply)
no
*also harbours secret fetish*

edit: actually, mine isn't that secret. I've mentioned it several times
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:21, Reply)
pigtails are cute
definitely go for them
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
You in pigtails makes me think of this
Which is not a good thing
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:28, Reply)
I would never wear flesh coloured knickers.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:30, Reply)
I do in summer when I wear my white dress
cos then no one can see them and its just a nice dress instead of a see through dress.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)

flesh coloured
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:32, Reply)

I blame the Jews
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:18, Reply)
I blame you

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:21, Reply)

I tend to prompt that reaction in some people.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
Shrewd thinking, young man.
They're behind all that is bad in the world. They also steal Christian children from their beds and boil them up in a big pot and eat them if they don't say their prayers.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
They crucified children in Norwich...
...and turned me into a newt.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:26, Reply)
It's not the groups I have a problem with it's the individual cunts in the groups
that set me off.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:28, Reply)
Spurs?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
always spurs and flash Arry!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
People are wrong on the internet.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
I tihnk it's more a case of people are stupid on the internet
did you see the racism post on the qotw?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
no not yet, have you got a link?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)

It is pretty frickin unbelievable Chompy.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
been there a few days at least
www.b3ta.com/questions/confess/post842809

I only saw it this morning
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:26, Reply)

I just wouldn't write it. Even if I thought it you know what kind of reaction you're gonna get.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
Canadians are the worst sort of Americans.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
half French, half American
never going to be good.

lolracism!
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:34, Reply)
I've found myself only reading QOTW throught the Archive and Best Of
and only occasionally reading the pages when I'm very bored :/

But at least I see the best and the worst.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:36, Reply)
when particularly bored
I skip to random pages in the middle and have a read.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:37, Reply)
I read one question when on the train
and found the answer about the game with Lions in. It made me laugh a little too much.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:39, Reply)
Precisely.
Rampant stupidity and the desire of other, right-thinking types to point this out*, means your (Vippers') hippy-dippy West Country utopia can never be a reality.

*and the polar opposite of this situation
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
Because this is the ebb and flow of OT
the transition from masses of cake and fluffeh to vicious cuntishness and back again.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
We can't get along
that'd be no fun.

Besides you're a massive cunt Vipros
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
I'm the least cunty one of the lot of you
so fuck you bitch
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
says Mr Cunt himself
it's well known that I'm nicer than you *and* have a better reputation
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:26, Reply)
as if

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:27, Reply)
well known facts
on the internet
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:27, Reply)
you're delusional

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:28, Reply)
stop chucking yourself
against the padded walls
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
Sorry Vippers
she is much nicer than you. Particularly in the breast department.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:51, Reply)
no one would argue with that

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:00, Reply)
ah but he said nicer in general
as well as breast department*

*up the elevator on the second floor
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:04, Reply)
he's been blinded by your breasts

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:05, Reply)
they're good
but not blindingly good
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:07, Reply)
not because of the quality
he was literally, physically blinded by them
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:10, Reply)
they're not lasers you realise?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:14, Reply)
lasers are not the only way that someone can be blinded

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:17, Reply)
nor are they very bright lights
unless you're mocking the fact that I'm very very white
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:20, Reply)
I hadn't thought it through
but if I were to go for any form of blinding it'd be the more direct "Your tits poked his eyes out"
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:23, Reply)
if his face was that close to my breasts
he deserves to be blinded
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:25, Reply)
the point I was getting at
is that if one is near you, then one can't help but get close to your breasts.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:52, Reply)
Stop making me sound
like a massively obese person
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:59, Reply)
ATTENTION READERS
AMBERL IS NOT MASSIVELY OBESE. SHE IS JUST BLESSED/CURSED WITH LARGE MAMMARIES.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 15:05, Reply)
Seems to happen every now and again, doesn't it?
I blame it on a lack of parenting skills. Not enough fruit and vegetables in the diet and too many E numbers all have a demonstrable effect of the behaviour of children.

I don't think TGB's seen a fresh vegetable yet, this week.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
she has
but where it was heading the only way she'd get nutrients from it is through osmosis.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:24, Reply)
second officelol

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:27, Reply)
Must have been
a watermelon.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:29, Reply)

she doesn't need to see it to shove it up her sweaty vag
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:24, Reply)
you need more subtlety

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)

you subtlety she lube
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:27, Reply)
GROUP HUG
*snugglywugglycuddlewuddles*
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
*Joins in *

(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:54, Reply)
If I'm honest, I've got a tad of short man syndrome today.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)

tad of
syndro in
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:27, Reply)
No, V lives with CHCB these days...

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:28, Reply)
I don't know what this means :(

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:30, Reply)
Captain V is the shortest man on b3ta.

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
Shorter, even, than I.
And that's going some.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
how short IS he then?

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:34, Reply)
Well, I'm a MASSIVE 5 foot 7, so I guess he's about 5' 6".
Or maybe my memory is creating falsehoods...
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:36, Reply)
....I'm 5'4.
so he's taller then me.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:38, Reply)
I thought everyone on qotw was a woman
it's all terribly confusing
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:34, Reply)
What, you mean you're not a woman?

(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:36, Reply)
It's complicated
I do have smashing breasts
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:40, Reply)
In that case:
Hello my dear, may I say that's a lovely blouse you have on...
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:43, Reply)
Nice one, ta
material chafes me pits a bit but I think the stripes work
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:44, Reply)
love it.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:29, Reply)
alright poppet

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:30, Reply)
alright broady

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
I like a good bit of banter, it's good to see when it can go both ways
But yes, Bobbychomp is a cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)

like a good bit of banter, it's good to see when it can
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
Not bad

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:35, Reply)
My heart was not really in it.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:44, Reply)
fuck you tranny!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:37, Reply)
You wish

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:39, Reply)
you'd be a more attractive tranny than a bloke

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:44, Reply)
you're an expert judge of this naturally

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:45, Reply)

Yes I have a working pair of eyes.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:49, Reply)
Sadly your logic appears flawed. Either that or your grasp of the english language
Surely it should be "You're a more attractive tranny than a bloke"?

Not "you'd", as I am a bloke, and as you've 'expertly' noticed, have cross dressed. So, get it right, you insignificant little fuck.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:55, Reply)
Here comes a last word again.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:57, Reply)
cheers for pointing that out.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:05, Reply)
BINGO!

(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:17, Reply)
Wouldn't want to disappoint you Al.
You seem to have me down to the letter.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:23, Reply)
Because you touch yourself at night.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
not just at night

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:32, Reply)
Well done sir
*applauds*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:32, Reply)
Because everyone today is feeling bitter and snipey?
I'm not.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
glad to hear it

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:34, Reply)
Me neither.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:37, Reply)
Do one you dinlo.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:38, Reply)
Fuck off, Geordie Racer

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 13:42, Reply)
I took the afternoon off and went to the gym
I've just had a nice long soak in the hot tub and am now lying in the sun next to the pool.
There are women in bikinis but I don't have my glasses on so I'm assuming they're all gorgeous.

I'm not angry AT ALL.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 1 Sep 2010, 14:43, Reply)

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