*Grumbleweeds*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:41, 43 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

*Bumbleseeds*
Edit: Seriously, where the very devil is everybody?
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:43, Reply)

I have killed and eaten them.
I only spared you as I don't like the taste of benders.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:46, Reply)

But we come pre-seasoned with a special fish(y) sauce!

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:47, Reply)

You vile creature.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:48, Reply)

You massive homophobe
It's no longer illegal to do what I do!

Well, apart from the fact I use public conveniences for it, and not all my partners are necessarily consenting. Or of a legal age. Or human.
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:49, Reply)

did you wake up on the wrong side of bed today Monts?
I had an afternoon nap because I was sleeeeeeeeeeepy after getting up early to do a chem tute. :(
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:45, Reply)

Nah, I am OK today, albeit knackered due to weeknight stupidity last night.
I've promised to go to my brother's for the evening, too, so that means another late one. Really regret that promise.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:47, Reply)

maybe take a raincheck?

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:49, Reply)

It is pissing with rain...

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:56, Reply)

the perfect excuse.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:12, Reply)

Monty's misplaced space saves him from accusations of mediaevil golden shower party fetish.
A Wee Knight stupidity indeed
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Don't let his anger fool you
Monty has a one-sided bed, just to ensure that he can always wake up on the wrong side of it and continue his mighty reign of grump upon this board.

Let's face it, imagine what this place would become if he woke up on the right side of bed.
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:48, Reply)

it'd be full of LOVE.
sickly, gooey love.

Actually I was having the weirdest dream about that half an hour ago. The love thing, not monty getting out of bed thing.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:49, Reply)

LIKE MY ANUS
(Well, someone was going to make that joke at some point)

So...erm...anyway...was it an interesting dream?
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:50, Reply)

Not as interesting as ours my dear.
Got any hair grips yet?
( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:52, Reply)

Why yes...would you prefer if I...left them in?
*tries to do seductive voice and fails on account of sounding like Rowley Burkin*
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:54, Reply)

I don't remember much about it, just the general gist.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:53, Reply)

Were hair accessories involved?

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:54, Reply)

no. Hands were, if I recall correctly.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:56, Reply)

This is all a bit weird
I'm on the board, as evidenced by my ill-timed thread, and yet you seem happy to assume the position (hehe) of bumder-in-chief. Back off, junior, or I'll bitchslap you into the middle of next week
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:54, Reply)

There is plenty of room for more than one bumder on here.

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:56, Reply)

GAYFIIIIIGGHTTT!!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:58, Reply)

I'm sorry to bring this up Monty,
bu the way you said that was REALLY gay. I can imagine you waving your hands excitedly whilst wearing a pink snood as you say it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:00, Reply)

You keep your perverted fantasies to yourself, please.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:04, Reply)

Too late
Far, far too late
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:06, Reply)

i'm with you
Late night getting sloshed in student bars on sun, mon, last night... then hooning back to london for big client do tonight, drinks with barristerrs tomorrow and a leaving do on fri, I am going to be dead by sat.

Still come on, there are worse ways to go. Like..... That dude who got eaten by a shark in south africa, for example?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:54, Reply)

That sounds quite appealing from where I'm sitting, today.
Have you a hangover, snugglekins?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 8:57, Reply)

good point at least it was quick
Yes I feel like someone kicked my head around the staircase in my sleep and now the same bastard is plucking at my eyeballs with some of your flaming rusty cheesewire. This is why I never ever drink cheap wine....

Who/what did you get up to?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:04, Reply)

I went to a friend's flat in Stoke Newington
where I was regaled (by another guest) with some fascinating/horrifying tales of large scale organised crime, all the while trying not to sound too posh whilst hoovering up cocaine by the metre.

Silly Monty.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:07, Reply)

i can see why you might feel a bit lousy today
My crap warm white wine blues are very pale in comparison! Although we did make the barman drop his tray of pint glasses with the conversation which was funny at the time, embarrassing now (swopping dreadful sex stories)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:13, Reply)

It was extremely entertaining at the time.
Less so at half four this morning, gibbering in my bed.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:16, Reply)

Chin up Monty
After the first spliff and halfway through the third drink, you'll be reaching for the chisel with a spring in your step and a click of the heels.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:05, Reply)

Cheer up Monters.
It'll soon be bash time.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:05, Reply)

*slits wrists*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:09, Reply)

Hmm
Oi, BGB! Does this get you frothing, or not?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:06, Reply)

Well he could do with a wash but yes he does.

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:09, Reply)

Ahh, wasn't sure
You really are a strange lady, aren't you?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:11, Reply)

So I've been told.

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:25, Reply)

It's all part of her charm.

(berk, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:29, Reply)

whatevs Monty
You'll be back to insanely happy soon. Are you bipolar? I think you are.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:31, Reply)

I think it's more "on drugs / not on drugs" than "manic / depressed" though
I imagine if he was teetotal he would fill the world with sparkly hearts and rainbows.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Who, Monty?
are you sure?
(berk, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 9:43, Reply)

*will gasmasks*

( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 10:25, Reply)