If you could be brilliant at one thing
What would you like to be brilliant at and why? It can't be for financial gain.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:06, 118 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

music
I hate that I am not much of a musician.

also sleeping. Off to bed now, night night
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:09, Reply)

tarra pet

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:11, Reply)

Skratching.
Chicks dig it and it is an ill skill if it pays the bills.

Fo sho.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:13, Reply)

Is that the DJ'ing thing?
How does it work exactly?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:15, Reply)

How does it work?
One moves a record back and or/ forth and cuts up the sound with the X fader, the up fader or the phono/line inputs.

Sounds easy but is bastard hard.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:16, Reply)

Would that type of scratching account for that 80s
'A-A-ah-yeah' type thing that was popular on some shitty pop hits?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)

I wouldn't know Jeffrey.
I do not listen to 'shitty pop hits'.

You tell me. Watch some Q Bert or DJ Craze stuff and tell me if it's similar to what you listen to.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:20, Reply)

I'm an aging Indie Kid
Crappy pop hits from my youth are as a result of listening to the radio 'back in the day'.

This sort of thing. www.youtube.com/watch?v=EgjNb-6EOYw&feature=related
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:25, Reply)

Bomb the Bass were never crappy
Yes, that is scratching.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)

Well, I was trying to think of something a bit more credible
Than some shitty pop song, as you might know it!

So is it a timing and movement thing? Knowing how far back to pull a record and when to release it, or are there other elements to being about to 'read' what to do?

Also, doesn't it fuck up the needle on the decks?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)

Timing and movement very much so.
And yes, knowing where and when to wind back to- that's why turntablists put stickers on their records. Mark it and count the revolutuons.

And no, if using direct drives (Technics or Vestax) and proper cartridges and needles, there's no real damage to the records or the needle.

And it just sounds cool.

Monty's the guy to ask about scratching really.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:35, Reply)

I've got friends from back in the 'rave days'
Who were never off their Technic 1210's (why I remember the model of the decks in beyond me) in their bedrooms.

What is 'direct drive'? (Sorry).

Also, they all had this thing about collecting 'white label' records, if you know the answer to that as well, I'd welcome it.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:40, Reply)

Direct Drive means that the platters are driven by rotating magnets rather than belts.
That way you can wind a record back and forth as much as you want without losing torque and they maintain a constant speed.

White labels are advance/ promo copies of tunes.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:46, Reply)

Are they worth any cash?
I'm sure a couple of them have 'Charley Says' by the Prodigy on white label.

The records are probably in a loft someone, as they are all having kids and stuff these days and not dancing in a field 'till the early hours.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:55, Reply)

have a look on discogs and ebay.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:07, Reply)

I will do.
Thanks.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:17, Reply)

I'd be brilliant at romancing
Because I'm fucking hopeless at it
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:15, Reply)

Me too.
At the moment, I'm a hopeless romantic. And not in a good way.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:16, Reply)

For Gods sake, man
grow a pair and go and invite her down to visit you.
(berk, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)

Who?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:26, Reply)

Oh, I'm alright at asking people out
I'm just a massive shitcunt so no one wants to know after that
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:21, Reply)

Lol, self-deprecation

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:24, Reply)

self deprecation emo-ing, now pack it in.
(berk, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:25, Reply)

yes, boss

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:28, Reply)

Being a national treasure

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:15, Reply)

Are you not content with being a B3ta treasure?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:16, Reply)

urgggh pass me the sick bag.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:17, Reply)

Bob
I was leading up to a 'Cash Converters' joke and you've ruined it.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)

You shut up the pair of yez.
I would be like Gracie Fields and Paul O'Grady with a touch of Ethel Merman, but not Vera fucking Lynn.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:22, Reply)

Hello scouse, stopped looking at your finger now
that prince twat stole your thunder?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:24, Reply)

The ring is in Hatton Fucking Garden getting resized
We shall be reunited on Saturday and I'll have it in time for Grandad's funeral. In yo FACE, WAG cousins.
Apparently I should not take time out of the eulogy to say "I'm not a spinster no mo'!"
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:27, Reply)

Sorry to hear about your grand father.
You okay?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)

this
x
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:30, Reply)

Will you stop putting kisses after ever post of mine you reply to.
Save them for your boyfriend Felix.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:31, Reply)

It's not a kiss, it's a target for my sniper you helmet
x (NOW HANZ, NOW!!)
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:31, Reply)

*ping*
That bounced off his helmet.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:32, Reply)

You're not wrong.
It's gone a bit purple.

I'll put that down to bruising.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)

bruising excessive masturbation
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:34, Reply)

It's like a bloody stump Bob.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:38, Reply)

We expected it a long time ago and he'd defied all the doctors' predictions
He had a good long happy life, then got ill, but went peacefully in the end.
Nervous about the eulogy but I'll just have to get on with it.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:32, Reply)

I had to do the eulogy for my father in law.
I hate to say this, but reading it was one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do.

I hope it goes well for you.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:34, Reply)

I did Nana's last year and my shoe fell off as I got up from the pew!
But as they've asked me again I'm guessing I was ok.
I found it harder writing it than reading it, but my cousin was on standby in case I went off my cake.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:40, Reply)

I'm sure you'll do a fantastic job.
It is the worst job in the world, but at the same time, you do get to say your own, special goodbye. And people will acknowledge your thoughts.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:42, Reply)

Just got to make sure I get a little memory from each kid and each grandkid
so it's not all about my view of him.
We used to sneak off to pubs, drink port and smoke roll-ups while I was meant to be studying.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:47, Reply)

What a fantastic memory.
Smoking and drinking and avoiding work will all remind you of him. With that sort of behaviour, he'll never be far from you.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:56, Reply)

We also shared the guilty pleasure of Sunset Beach
Ah, it'll be fine. Ta Jeff :D
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:00, Reply)

No problem mate.
When in the funeral?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:02, Reply)

Monday
Gets me out of a meeting where I have to do a presentation.
He's helping me skive again.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:05, Reply)

You'll be giving a much more difficult presentation.
I hope it goes well.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:17, Reply)

your mum
not really, I'd like to be the worlds best drummer.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:17, Reply)

If you could have
played/written (I don't know what the term is) on any popular song, what one would you have loved to have been responsible for?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:20, Reply)

What a fantastic question.
Can it be a song I like rather than a popular song?
Song I like - Passenger, Deftones or You've got a killer scene there man, QOTSA
Popular song - Milk, Kings of leon, not for the drumming as there is fuck all but love the song.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:23, Reply)

I had you down as more of a Topper Hendon type.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:28, Reply)

STOP MAKING ME GOOGLE SHIT!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:32, Reply)

You don't like The Clash?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:35, Reply)

yuck no, shite.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:36, Reply)

What do you hate about them?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:37, Reply)

Not my kind of music at all, shouty crap rock with nothing interesting going on.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:43, Reply)

I don't think you've ever been more wrong.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:45, Reply)

you obviously didn't mark my Philosophy A level then my friend.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:45, Reply)

hahahaha
What did you get?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:57, Reply)

*Tipi Hedren

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:40, Reply)

I'm a passable musician
or at least, I am when I practise, but it'd be awesome to be properly good. Or a comedian. Normally when people laugh around me, it's at and not with.
(berk, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:18, Reply)

What do you play?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:21, Reply)

Piano and tenor saxophone
and a bit of guitar.
(berk, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:24, Reply)

Check out the multi-talented berk!
I'd love to be able to play anything. Even the triangle.

But I'm too much of a mong to manage that.

What grade piano did you get to?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:28, Reply)

Self taught
but about grade 5ish
(berk, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:38, Reply)

So you've got Chop-sticks nailed then?
Ever thought of having lessons?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:45, Reply)

Nope
I took a few months of sax lessons but they were really expensive. And besides, I can play the piano fairly well so how would I benefit from lessons?
(berk, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:53, Reply)

You'd get even better again and learn to read music?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:02, Reply)

I can read music!
I'd never have gotten to grade 5 or thereabouts otherwise, nor would I be able to play the saxophone. I'm not so great at counting, though.
(berk, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:09, Reply)

I can't do rhythms for shit.
And I had about 10 years of lessons.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:10, Reply)

Haha, I'm glad it's not just me then!
Once I've heard the piece I'm fine, but sight reading is a struggle. To be fair, I'm not sure lessons would help that overmuch anyway, it's just practise...which I very rarely do.
(berk, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:13, Reply)

I failed grades 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6 sightreading
(there's a small section in the exam, worth 18 marks out of the hundred I think, not a separate exam)
I passed grades 1 and 7 though ^_^

I often have to listen to work out how sections go. But often the pace is much faster than what I can practice with, so I have to slow down, and I get it wrong yet again.
I was meant to take my grade 8 at soem point this year, but no pianos at college meant I didn't practice so can't do it. I played my pieces over the weekend and loved how my fingers just slipped back into the notes...
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:17, Reply)

My piano is my pride and joy
I only ever play it when I'm hammered though - sad times :(
In fact I think I might go and have a tootle on it now and then go to bed. Night!
(berk, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:18, Reply)

Night night!
I'm going to get one when I get my own place. I love playing :D
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:20, Reply)

I'd like to have a fantastic memory
An eidetic one. Or be brilliantly funny.

Although I can't 'do' music, I'm now used to that so not bothered
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:28, Reply)

Not a chef then?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:30, Reply)

no point
I don't want to cook for a living
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:36, Reply)

But your love of the SuperNoodle?
(Did you get any super noodles? And did you enjoy them if you got some?)
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:37, Reply)

i eat them
At 4 in the morning while watching dvds in the mcr. Tasty but I only eat the curry ones
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:41, Reply)

I told you they'd stop you wasting away!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:44, Reply)

ha
i haven't had supernoodles since i was a student!

i do have a very lazy soft spot for uncle ben's microwave rice, though.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:53, Reply)

supernoodles are so bad for me
But they are also easy to make
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:17, Reply)

What not branch out a bit?
www.youtube.com/user/terrytheoddjobman?feature=chclk#p/u/3/NF7LDN7k9vw
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:22, Reply)

I would like to be proper good at sewing and dressmaking and possibly art and sculpture
so basically my grandma before the early bereavement and brain disease.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)

You can only have one.
Them's the rules.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:30, Reply)

Just the dressmaking then. As sewing has to come into that.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:31, Reply)

My mother is a talented seamstress
For years she made her own clothes.

Eye sight is fucked now though, so it rarely happens these days.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:36, Reply)

I only really knew the artist grandma in the later years of her life
when she was dying. But she always used to make me nightgowns out of Liberty lawn. My dad used to make dresses for my mum when they were first dating. I can sew a little but it seems to be fading with each generation :(
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:38, Reply)

Do you have time to enrol on a course?
I know my mum is thinking of buying a new sewing machine, she has had her current one (a Singer) since the early 80's!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:43, Reply)

I have a sewing machine I got from Gumtree
bought with said grandma's will money. Back in manchester there's a good-sounding course at one of my favourite vintage shops. I'll see if there's a good WI in London, there seems to be a resurgence of that. Or I'll just join the KCL one.

I'm reasonably nimblefingered, I just have a problem with cutting in straight lines.
edit: the last time I tried sewing things it was a tear, and I failed, but I was hammered at the time...
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:47, Reply)

I remember as a kid not being allowed to have my toys out in the living room
As mother was pinning a pattern to some material.

Ahh, memories.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:58, Reply)

Same, but for mother's marking.
Bloody teachers.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:00, Reply)

Were you a pupil at the school your mother taught at?
I always felt sorry for kids who had a parent teaching at the school.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:04, Reply)

No, I went to the BETTER school about 5 mins walk away.
My mother's post there was a major choice in me not going there. And the other school was better.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:07, Reply)

You think she'd have made the shit school better with her SKILLS
And given you the chance to get the top education!

What did/does she teach?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:16, Reply)

It's not shit at all, it's an excellent school.
But ours- it's insane. My year got 97.6% A*/A grades at GCSE the year I took them, or something.

Oh, she's a history teacher.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:18, Reply)

Dressmaking skills would make my life complete

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)

I have so many beautiful plans but no way to execute them.
Hope everything's going ok in Rootaland and that Mr Roota is being nice to you.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:35, Reply)

Mr Roota, I likes that!
He's a good lad he is.

I only want to be able to make shift dresses y'know Lamps.
You alright?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:41, Reply)

There should be some good patterns online
If not I could photocopy one of my sewing books that have a good guide to it.

He is, and I wish you both the best of luck and happiness and all that sentimental guff but I do mean it.

I'm fine, just sleepy and not yet into the work mindframe I need, but for the moment I have Harry Potter and fags and I'll wash my hair with cinnamon shampoo and it'll ALL be dandy.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:44, Reply)

I have got a bastard few days ahead of me, but RARRRR I CAN DO THIS!
*slaps own face like 'Enry putting on aftershave*

I need to learn to follow patterns. It looks mental, but I'm slowing down and understanding instructions more as I get older.

And RARRRR YOU CAN DO THIS!
(Thanks for the soppiness. It's appreciated.)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:50, Reply)

Best of luck. Keep your shoes on.
I often get confused by written instructions, which is why I can only purl as I was shown how to, and cannot knit despite how many tutorials I read. But patterns seem ok. Cut along the lines, eh?

No problem. b3ta weddings are always cause for celebration. Unless you're Edmund.
Let's hope you can beat his record.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 16 Nov 2010, 23:59, Reply)

He keeps trying to kid me that he's really Edmund and that it was a revenge-proposal.
Sometimes the look in his eyes is quite convincing.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:01, Reply)

One day you'll come home, take off your hat and shoes,
and dj's skin will be hanging on the coathook, next to a TA's uniform...
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:03, Reply)

I just peed the bed there
With fright.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:04, Reply)

No, that was just gush.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:08, Reply)

EEEEEEEEEE

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:10, Reply)

Sorry love.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:10, Reply)

Splash it all over Rooty.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:06, Reply)

I'd like to be able to draw
Proper "catching the sunrise over the mountains" type drawing. That or be able to really sing well. Those two things just don't work for me however much I try, especially the drawing.
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:07, Reply)

one of my good friends from school is an artist
she can just sketch something stunning in about 3 strokes of a pencil. very unfair!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:09, Reply)

I can sketch something stunning in three strokes
If by "something stunning" you mean "some sort of rudimentary club".
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:33, Reply)

So I crept into the palace with a sponge and a rusty spanner.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:11, Reply)

I wish I was good at gauging how people feel.
Because at present I'm rubbish. That or being good at football, I'd play for Fulham for nowt.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:13, Reply)

Oh hiya
I'm off to bed y'all
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:14, Reply)

Sleep well lar.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 17 Nov 2010, 0:15, Reply)