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Each week we ask a question. The idea is to generate material that's:
* interesting to read, i.e. we won't get bored of reading the answers after about 10 of them
* not been asked on this site before
* fun to answer
What would you like to ask? (We've left this question open - so feel free to drop in ideas anytime.)
( , Wed 14 Jan 2004, 13:01)
Tell Us Your Story »
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What lengths have you gone to, to bring yourself to the attention of the object of your desires?
From coy flirtations to downright stalker mode.
( , Tue 19 May 2009, 1:23, Reply)
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Mine was when I threw my brothers’ hat to a bunch of penguins in the zoo, they tried to eat it instead of the fish they were being given buy the feeder.
( , Mon 18 May 2009, 21:11, 1 reply, 16 years ago)
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Simple really, for instance this could be the story of the underwear stuck to the light, the story of the local haunted house or the story of the blue Honda accord that ran your grandmother over.
( , Mon 18 May 2009, 21:07, Reply)
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Impulse buying is a horrifying event which befalls men women and children all the like and usually has them scrambling to buy the most inane crap. So I ask tells us what inane crap you have bought under such impulses
( , Mon 18 May 2009, 21:06, Reply)
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All we ever hear about these days is how our grimy elected MPs are fiddling us, the Great British taxpayers,
out of our hard earned wages and spending it on moats, second homes and pet tigers !
But...what great scams have you managed to claim on your own expenses !!
( , Mon 18 May 2009, 19:43, Reply)
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If all that stood between you and a shag/last orders/a lottery win/etc was a Honda Accord?
( , Mon 18 May 2009, 17:51, 1 reply, 16 years ago)
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Crap comedians from yesteryear were known for their mother-in-law jokes. Tell us your genuine stories - good or bad - about your own in laws.
( , Sat 16 May 2009, 22:54, Reply)
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Everybody's got one, the story they've told a million times. The tale they'll never get tired of spinning. The one guaranteed to have everyone laughing.
Or, Gigs/Concerts
( , Fri 15 May 2009, 16:10, Reply)
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apologies if this has been done before
( , Fri 15 May 2009, 13:57, Reply)
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Has QOTW finally "jumped the shark" ?
( , Fri 15 May 2009, 13:39, Reply)
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and someone brought up teachers, I think a good one would be 'the best teacher you ever had.'
Everyone must have had at least one absolute hero of a teacher, and I would feel sorry for someone who never did.
( , Fri 15 May 2009, 12:09, 1 reply, 16 years ago)
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But your Favourite Memories.
What are they and Why?
( , Fri 15 May 2009, 8:11, Reply)
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It's a multiple choice QOTW:
What is the maddest thing you have ever said yes to?
What do you most regret not saying yes to?
( , Thu 14 May 2009, 20:01, Reply)
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The Burma pro-democracy leader faces the rest of her life under house arrest because of someone taking a swim to see her.
What have you done to get someone in trouble?
( , Thu 14 May 2009, 13:41, Reply)
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possibly about what your having for lunch or something?
( , Wed 13 May 2009, 16:57, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
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Your answer must include 'getting the last laugh' 'picture the scene' and 'that was his first mistake' and should end with you having sex with someone.
Bonus points for austism and linebreaks.
( , Wed 13 May 2009, 16:11, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
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I was thinking about when I finally became a real life adult, and I think it was when I had to make a decision my parents couldn't make, that being to put our pet down.
When did you realise you became an adult?
I know this might leave a few b3tards out, but it's less discriminating than penis stories.
( , Tue 12 May 2009, 15:01, 1 reply, 16 years ago)
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what's the longest grudge you've held, against whom (or what) and what's the nature of the grudge?
( , Tue 12 May 2009, 10:16, 1 reply, 16 years ago)
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... but can't be arsed looking back through everything.
Inappropriate Facebook groups? For example, Jews that look like Hitler
( , Mon 11 May 2009, 13:19, Reply)
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About to spend the summer in Japan, I am frantically trying to Level Up my Japanese to avoid massively offending everyone I meet.
When has your knowledge, or lack thereof, of a foreign language dropped you in it?
( , Sun 10 May 2009, 12:05, Reply)
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The best one I overheard was between a rugby player and one of the student union barstaff:
Him (extending his arm and pointing to his sleeve): 'Feel that!'
Her: 'Er...'
Him: 'Feel that!'
Her (touches his sleeve): 'Now what?'
Him: 'Does that feel like boyfriend material to you?'
Her: '...'
( , Thu 7 May 2009, 15:29, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
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So do you have any anatomical quirks - be they hindrances or something you find comes in handy - that make you think your body isn't quite normal?
Do your ears seem to be incapable of fitting standard-issue iPod earphones (they keep falling out)? Does your cock not do that 'pre-cum' thing? Does your mimsy emit rainbows?
What makes you a freak of Nature?
( , Wed 6 May 2009, 22:15, Reply)
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Tell us a funny story that doesn't take a million years to read.
( , Wed 6 May 2009, 9:59, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
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What poor examples of humanity have you had to put up with, either now or as a child? How did you deal with them?
( , Tue 5 May 2009, 21:04, Reply)
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Tell us about the havoc you would cause should you unjustifiably lose your job.
Appreciated this is a bit of an IT-centric question but I would...
a) Ensure my client's homepage redirects to the I Love Horses link. Then write a wee script to ensure that if the content of the page changes (i.e. they fix it), my page replaces it again. Hide said script in their backup scripts.
b) Publish my video that I created to demo their existing security vulnerabilities on YouTube.
c) Take a dump in the server room. All that aircon should make things smell *nice* ...
What about you?
( , Tue 5 May 2009, 17:51, Reply)
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Tell us about that incredible, gorgeous, sexy person whose image filled your every thought but stubbonly refused to acknowledge your existence, or worse still, rebuffed you cruelly.
Tell us about the flowers you'd lay at your 'Phwoarr memorial'.
( , Tue 5 May 2009, 14:09, Reply)
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Last night I dreamt there was a cerberus in the toilet and it killed the plumber. Anyone have anything weirder?
( , Mon 4 May 2009, 17:57, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
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A chat up line beyond all comprehension...
" I'm going to paint your ovaries with my meat paintbrush. Guess what, it only comes in one colour."
( , Mon 4 May 2009, 13:54, 1 reply, 16 years ago)
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