"What's this new fella's name then?"
"Mo"
"Not short or Mohammed, I hope. Har har har."
"Yes."
( Ungersven would support SpankyHanky's patreon, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 23:56, 6 replies)

My grandfather was always racist. I remember he always had some kind of remark about black people.
Thankfully I don't remember the details. But this story is how he became not so racist.

He had to have a triple bypass heart surgery after a massive heart attack. His surgeon was black, and he caused a huge sensation by vowing he'd die before a nigger was allowed to perform heart surgery on him. My grandfather's physician told him he would do it rather than fight him any longer. The last thing my grandfather saw before falling asleep was the black surgeon looking over him.

When he awoke later, all his racism was gone and he was laughing, kind of, at the trickery. He couldn't thank the surgeon enough and they were almost inseparable until he left the hospital. They stayed in contact until my grandfather died in 2001.
(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 22:52, 7 replies)

She wasnt really racist but...
My late Gran used to refer to anyone of à dusky pigmentation as having "à touch of the tar-brush in him". I am orten tempted to use such a useful phrase but seldom actually do.
(Hurple Pelmet, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 20:44, 4 replies)

Not my grandmother but my mother
(well, she is over sixty now and has grandkids, so...)

Not just her own racism, but her accusations of racism are the stuff of legend. We're from the Middle East and have lived all over Europe. Once, when I mentioned I had hardly ever faced any racism, especially not in Germany, where it was supposedly rampant at the time, she was livid:

"Well, how about those school mates of yours who asked you whether you'd have to wear a headscarf during the holidays? And who didn't know how to eat a pomegranate? Our people have been living here for generations and they know nothing about them, how is that not racist?"

Yes, the way she sees it, not knowing any details about the culture or food of the people living in your country is proof of you being Adolf's direct descendant.

Herself, you ask? Well, again the way she sees it, she is the most progressive, revolutionary and non-discriminatory person that exists. But listen to her for a bit, and you will find that Europeans are filthy (because they wipe instead of washing their bum), Arabs are backward in addition to being disgusting, and Kurds are servile and treacherous, not to mention the reason for half the things going wrong in this country.

Sometimes I wonder how much time I have left before I find myself agreeing with her.

PS - Oh, and my father, her husband of a different country and culture - is famous for insulting his wife's country while in it (often loudly and drunkenly, having caused scandals and public outrage a few times) and adamantly defending it (quite as loudly and drunkenly) while in his own. They seem to deserve each other.
(orangeyouglad, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 17:17, 2 replies)

My Dads Parents
were a pair of miserable fuckers. I remember my dad telling me that they loved Louis Armstrong's songs until they discovered he was black.
(kitescreech still here, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 14:54, Reply)

Just an observation.
"BraynDedd" formerly known as Bryan the Brummie (or whatever the fuck he was called). So you chose a a troll as the best suggestion.

Bryan is an amoeba-brain that has never posted anything even vaguely interesting on QOTW and spends his time writing derogatory replies to, well, pretty much everyone.

Please - check out his profile and read his spiteful crap that is his sole contribution to QOTW...

And you wonder why the quality of the posts on QOTW has gone down....?


Most forums have a "Do Not Feed The Trolls" policy. B3ta QOTW seems to have policy of "Fuck it - trolls rule...."

Cheers
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sun 30 Oct 2011, 14:52, 26 replies)

A friend of mine's very Irish dad
Refuses to eat pizza on the grounds that it is 'foreign muck'.
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 13:38, 5 replies)

Not because she was a slut
Years ago, after splitting up with my fiancée who'd been fucking around behind my back and spending all my money, I was talking to my grandma about it - or rather, she was poking her nose in and asking why I'd lost my totty. So I explained why we split up, without the sloppy details, to spare her oldster sensibilities.
Grandma's reaction? "I'm glad, though, really. You should stick to your own kind."

So being cuckolded, ripped off and exploited wasn't as bad as being slightly different colours.
Still, granny's dead, so who's laughing now?
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 12:26, 2 replies)

This man
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-15330421

Can't get more racist than that.
( ousgg is not seeking approval, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 10:52, 11 replies)

My asian mates family all call me a cracker, grandparents included.....
(shake'n'bake Tally Ho, Biatch!, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 6:28, 5 replies)

My grandad only wears slip on shoes, or ones that do up with Velcro.

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Sun 30 Oct 2011, 5:56, 16 replies)

Bloody badum badum badum Benny Goodman crap all day long.
I hate my bassist grandparents.

PS This may be a bassless accusation.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 1:53, 1 reply)

When I was about 7 I was lying in bed one Christmas eve and I thought I could hear the beautiful sound of Santa's sleigh bells. Turned out to be my drunken grandfather unbuckling his belt behind me. Rapist grandparents.
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 1:39, Reply)

The wife's Grandad...
...was in hospital, in a ward with 6 beds. In the bed opposite was a black man, who was in a bad way. He had bad stomach problems, and was refusing food. On one occasion when I was visiting, a nurse was trying to get the man to eat a sandwich.
Grandad was watching, and suggested quite loudly,
"His sort don't eat our food - get him a banana!"
(Captain Coffee Break, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 1:19, 4 replies)

Not my Grandfather but...
In around 2004-5, while in a "barfly" phase of the "student/barfly" flipflop I lived during my 20s, I struck up a conversation with a middle-aged black plasterer.

He was of the opinion that the then-recent influx of Poles were "coming over here when they had no right to do so, were stealing our jobs, stealing our women and should all be sent back where they came from".

He probably has grandkids by now, or something.
( cs1ca, Sun 30 Oct 2011, 0:17, 8 replies)

Don't know if this counts
my mum told her parents this joke last time they were out here in Oz. They were all born in Great Britain. I was born in Africa.

"How can you tell a plane load of Poms?"
"You can still hear the whining after the engines have been turned off."

Grandad was not amused. He loudly proclaimed that Australia was "full of convicts and their descendants."
His smugness wore off when I then pointed out that they were all British convicts and the only reason they were there in the 1st place was because England didn't have enough room to incarcerate all the criminals that they seemed to be producing at the time.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sat 29 Oct 2011, 21:06, 22 replies)

Is there anyone posting on here
who isn't white Caucasian, with an oh-so-superior story to tell about how their (ghastly, proletarian, white) grandparents told them to keep them away from the (noble, would-be-middle-class-if-it-werent-for racists, non-white) "other"? Seems to me B3TA is in its own self-imposed "Love Thy Neighbour" bubble world here.
(Chiliconcarne's Waiting What place is this, Histor?, Sat 29 Oct 2011, 19:39, 20 replies)

I grew up in Northern Ireland in the 80's....
while the troubles were not just as bad then (compared to the 70's) it was amazing I didn't grow up to be a sectarian twat, however it is the reason why I will never ever live there again and keep visits to a minimum. Hate the place.

Anyway, my point:

When I was young I used to be at my grandparents a lot after school. Watching TV with my grandad he would always flick through the stations and recite the phrase:

"Lot of aul' muck! This is what happens when you give them papishes a vote!'

-When he came across a program he didn't like.

Now I loved my grandfather, but it was years later before I even knew what a papist was....sometimes you wonder what happened to him to make him that bitter.
( Bamboo Steamer, Sat 29 Oct 2011, 17:35, 7 replies)

Not JUST racist....
Bit of a pearoast, however the racism comes in combination with much, much more:

Granny Jackboots

Well, she may be gone now, but she'll never be forgotten... She earned the nickname for a reason.

Every time there was soemthing like the olympics on and there was a black British athlete (say, Lindford Christie for example), she'd peer up close at the TV, and say "Well! He's not British". She abhored comedy of any kind except Jim Davidson....

This wasn't all however... She would take umbridge, and bear a grudge for all eternity. Once, when I was still in the pram, she was staying with my parents and one evening offered to do the washing up. They politely said thank you but it's OK, we've got a machine. Fair enough, off she goes for a bit. Later in, she decides the time is right to be outraged by this refusal, storms into the kitchen with a bowlful of water and chucks it over me, strapped into the pushchair where I can't escape. Apparently she meant to get my dad.

Also, when she was very young, her father came back from a Naval voyage with two teddies, a slightly bigger one for her older sister. She never let her sister forget this until her dying day. Even when Alzheimers had ravaged her brain she remembered getting the smaller teddy and was still incredibly bitter about it.

When my great grandmother died, she left her wedding ring to my mum in her will. Granny Jackboots however decided that my mum shouldn't be allowed such precious things, and snuck into her room one day and stole it - and never gave it back.

This is the clincher though - When my mum announced she was pregnant with my eldest sibling, the response was: "Oh, and when are you going to get rid of it then?" Followed by constantly offering the services of an abortion clinic.

Grandparents, why stop at JUST being racist when you can be so very much more?
( Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Sat 29 Oct 2011, 16:09, 4 replies)

Bloody Hell. I just won at Racist Grandparents.
You all can stop playing now.

You see, aside from the general ambient levels of absolute white supremacy that exists across the entirety of rural Australia, I couldn't remember any particularly stunning displays of overt racism from any of my grandparents.

But then I realised that Nana and Pop were Roman Catholics. And there is seriously no organisation on earth more fucking racist than that.
(Gritty, yet fluffy. kipperpillock is obsessed with me =), Sat 29 Oct 2011, 15:31, 19 replies)

Only just last weekend...
Me and the missus were tripping over to her grandparents to get their laptop back to the state of "not screaming for the sweet relief of fire".

While there, her grandmother constantly commented on the fact that she is not allowed to use the term "nigger brown" to describe the missus' skirt.
(Nirmeth My ignore list is fucking huge. Hint., Sat 29 Oct 2011, 15:02, 2 replies)

Maths class
My grandma once passed on this gem of wisdom from my great-grandfather, who was a primary school teacher. He used to emphasise the importance of numeracy by telling his pupils to "study maths so the Jew can't trick you."
(rogermexico Ah, c'est moi! Je m'ai fait peur!, Sat 29 Oct 2011, 14:09, 2 replies)

Jungle Juice.
Evey 4 years i get to hear my nan, the lovely old bat she is, say how black people have an advantage with running in the olympics because they are so used to running away from lions, regardless of what country they are representing.
(The_Crund, Sat 29 Oct 2011, 14:01, Reply)

overheard while my grandfolks were watching The Comedians when I was about 8
Granny was complaining about the presence of Charlie Williams on the screen which Granddad was enjoying. Eventually after a full minute of racist bitching he turned around, so I thought, to defend Charlie Williams' talent and justification for being on the TV, but what he actually said was 'Well you don't mind talking to the newspaper seller in Feltham and he's a n****r as well'. By which he apparently 'won' the argument. Seeing as granddad was Irish and granny was a Geordie still surprised they got married at all.
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Sat 29 Oct 2011, 12:46, Reply)

A righteous, right on, young, Draino
Had occasion to pull his grandfather up on the use of the word "spook" I told him "That is racist" to which he replied
"I aint racist, I just don't like black people"
(Which, as it turns out was true).
(Draino, Sat 29 Oct 2011, 11:56, 6 replies)

A casual bit of racism at Easter - just what Jebus would have wanted.
One Easter we had to do the big family dinner. Gather up all the old people and sit them down for dinner, await our Easter eggs and crazy crap that was bestowed on us.
Dinner went well, with the usual discussions of what Barbara down the road had been up to - "You remember Barbara!?!" and we thought that another dinner had past quite well. That was until the TV went on.
The oldies argued over what to watch, until it was finally decided that Britain’s Got Talent was the most family friendly and interesting for all. Settling down to watch the horrific renditions of "My Heart Will Go On" and dancing dogs, we were all pleasantly surprised when a very good dancing group appeared on our TV box.
The group danced, crowd went wild and the front room all agreed that they were very good and should go through. Thinking that this day was going to end on a high note, my Nan said "They are very good dancers, especially the little one" to which my Granddad’s girlfriend piped up "Well their kind usually can dance". Stunned silence. The group that we'd just been watching was Diversity.
(pink_kittyboo was killed by many bunnies on, Sat 29 Oct 2011, 10:50, 2 replies)

Does anyone know that experiment
where they got college students to pretend to be prisoners or guards, but then it all went horribly wrong when everyone started acting and thinking like they really were what they were pretending to be?

This QOTW is like an online version of that.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sat 29 Oct 2011, 10:47, 26 replies)