Can I get this in first?
I had a dreadful childhood, we were poor, never had anything, I was grateful for every single thing we possessed. Sure we were poor, but we had love. I had some bad times. But we had love and friendship. We all died of starvation, but at least we had love and friendship and family. My parents sold their kidneys to buy me the bus fare for my Uni interview. Fortunately we had love and friendship and families and hope.

It's made me a better person. Kids today, eh, don't know they're born. All they need is love and friendship and families and hope and self-belief. Etc, etc.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:47, 24 replies)

And fanny
they all need fanny.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:49, closed)

Your like a more bitter and cynical Jack Dee.
and funnier.
( girlinthehole, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:49, closed)

:)
I love it when you're splenetic.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:49, closed)

I love it
when you use big words Enzyme. I imagine those words of yours are like a big vocabulary penis that you use to first gently tease the internet before them plunging them all the way in.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:51, closed)

Erm...
Yeah. Possibly.

I think.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:54, closed)

Mmmmm
Possibly is a good word to get your tongue around.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:58, closed)

So
is cock. If you're a girl and like cock. Or a bloke that likes cock.

It is the 21st century after all.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 9 Oct 2008, 20:52, closed)

Ah,,,,,,
CHCB; all you need to recover from teh fluffeh.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:51, closed)

Kids today need...
...fucking Birching. Nothing more, nothing less.
(Avalanche - Purveyor of sexual deviancy since 1976, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:53, closed)

Should kids really be getting birched by a purveyor of sexual deviancy?
(Musuko, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 16:35, closed)

PAh! you were lucky!
We had to bloody well share a dreadful childhood between eight of us!
(Rich T has a clever and witty sig, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 14:56, closed)

i've got to ask
is your sig from The Stand? it's got the smell of Tom Cullen about it.

M-O-O-N, that spells moon...
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:02, closed)

it's a line from a Tom Waits song -
a dark and rather twisted song called "Don't go into that barn"
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:05, closed)

i may have to keep a look-out for it.

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 2:39, closed)

@ CHCB
Is that off Real Gone?
I like that track.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:11, closed)

aye
that's the one
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:13, closed)

Hmmm
Still don't know what to make of that album.

Small Change is still my favourite.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:31, closed)

Swordfish Trombone
And Raindogs
(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:37, closed)

Both good too
He's generally pretty ace:D
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:43, closed)

Both kidneys for a bus fare?
That'll be an 8 hour, 2 mile journey with Firstbus then.
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:34, closed)

Firstbus
are the reason I bought a car.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:35, closed)

Firstbus
are the reason I am no longer a virgin.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:45, closed)

Firstbus
killed my parents.
(LickOutTheJamsMotherfuckers!, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 15:47, closed)

Firstbus of Fight Club is...
... you do NOT get the bus to Fight Club.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 9 Oct 2008, 16:01, closed)