The Game
Tradition amongst a group of us for the past few years. The whole point of 'The Game' is that you don't think about 'The Game'. If you think about it, or remember that it exists, you have lost The Game. You must then let everyone else who knows about it know that you have lost the game, therefore reminding them of it and making them lose too.

The number of texts I've had saying "I just lost the game", for me to then think, damn, I hadn't thought about it for months!

Oh, and by the way, since you all now know about the game, you are automatically included in it, whether you like it or not, It's too late to stop reading now, it's been done. You're playing...

oh yeah,

I just lost the game
( Hampster Squared has stuff at www.tilla.co.uk, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 19:17, Reply)

Anyone ever heard of the straw bear??
Where i live out in the sticks in a funky town named Whittlesey, we have an annual tradition (in the lovely summer month of January ffs) for a bloke and a kid to wear a complete straw suit and get led from one end of the town to the other by an old guy. This isn't the only fun, oh no, we have morris dancing, maypole dancing and generally people making prats out of themselves wiv their face painted black or red. Apparently it attracts people from 'all over the world' - in other words some Germans accidentally had the misfortune of ending up her once. Upon trying at least to join in with this years festivities by going to the pub, we found this to be impossible as they were overflowing with grannies and morris dancers :(

P.s on the Sunday (the main day is Saturday) they burn the straw suits publicly.

and no sadly, the cunts aren't still in them.
(paintboy, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 19:11, Reply)

When my high school band...
went on away trips, we had two traditions I could think of (among many, many more). First off, we had to be completely silent for the last fifteen minutes of the trip.
Also, when we crossed railroad tracks, we would touch a screw, touch something red (our school color) and lift our feet off the floor.
One year, I was put in charge of one of the buses. On one trip, I saw railroad tracks coming up very fast, too fast to clearly tell everyone, so I yelled to everybody, "SCREW TIME!" I think most people missed it from laughing.
(meeezalch, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 19:10, Reply)

Jimbo, they're going to bulldoze the fucker to the ground
...to build a shopping complex or something (my parents live in Chesterfield and they keep me abreast of developments).

As for traditions, the only family one I can think of is watching "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" every year, at my mum's insistence. She experiences fart-inducing laughs throughout, which is worth every minute of insufferable Chase-lite humour.

Oh, plus I recently got married (certainly a traditional sort of thing to do)and my wife has taken my surname (another tradition, I suppose).
(Nardis, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 19:07, Reply)

Not exactly a tradition...
But whenever I turn on the TV and something irritating is on (big brother, adverts with Michael Winner, regional news etc.) I must immediately turn off the TV and spend the next few minutes resisting the urge to throw it out the window. Once this has subsided, I can turn the TV back on and continue watching something else that isn't, well, shite.
(Flabbergaster laughs at danger (and breaks all the rules), Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:55, Reply)

Whilst in the car
Coming home from the south to Sheffield by car, you'd go over a big roundabout with a factory (called Bryan Donkin) next to it.

When you got there, it meant you were nearly home, and could thus sing the Bryan Donkin song.

It went "Bryan Donkin, Bryan Donkin, Bryan Donkin, Bryan Donkin, Bryan Donkin".
(jimbo_smiff, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:54, Reply)

ah, this brings back memories
when my sister and i were young, there were many family traditions that, sadly, seem to have stopped through age...

* when going over a cattle-grid, you *must* hold onto your knees. otherwise "your bottom will fall off."

* saturday night was always pizza and garlic bread night.

* at christmas we would drive round in my dad's car looking for blue christmas lights (it was my sisters favorite colour)

* after being picked up by my dad from my gran's, tubular bells had to played (or there would be ructions!)

* no cheese on wednesdays - i STILL have absolutely no idea why...

* tuesdays - swimming with my mum, then off to a cafe for something to eat

* if we ever went abroad on holiday we would have to find an electricity substation for my dad...no, i don't know either (my family are werid)

* boring one, but everyone had to be in the house by 5 on sunday for a 'proper family dinner'. traditional sunday roast. hated it at the time but since we don't do it anymore i really miss it...
(Nos coeurs cocaine Montparnasse Le mix de gelée vodka et le beat, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:52, Reply)

New Year's Day
You know it's traditional to bring someone a lump of coal on New Year's Day? Apparently it's good luck or something.

I've tried this and been greeted with the traditional response of "Why the fuck are you bringing me a lump of coal?"
(Pachey, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:50, Reply)

BOLLOCKS!
_/glastonbury
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:45, Reply)

White rabbits
Thanks for reminding me, kiwanotree - my mum passed the same thing on to me, but I must have slowly stopped doing it. I wonder if that's when things started going downhill...

As we did it, you had to say "rabbit" first thing on the 1st of any month with an "r" in it; if there were two (i.e. February) you has to say "white rabbit". What happened if you failed was left unsaid, in a curiously sinister way...

Just found this (whatever did we do before Google?):
"A luck-bringing custom found all over Great Britain is to say 'Rabbits' or 'White Rabbits' once or three times on the first day of the month. It must be said early in the morning, before any other word has been uttered, otherwise the charm loses its force. In some districts it is considered necessary to say 'Hares' or 'Black Rabbits' when going to bed on the night before, as well as 'Rabbits' or White Rabbits' in the morning. If, however, the speaker becomes muddled and says 'Black Rabbits' on rising, bad luck will follow. The looked-for result of all this is variously given as general good luck during the ensuing four weeks, or the receipt of a gift within a few days." From the "Encyclopedia of Superstitions" by E. and M.A. Radford, edited and revised by Christina Hole, Barnes and Noble Books, 1996. First published in 1948.
(user_requested_deletion, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:40, Reply)

for some reason....
when I got into sixth form, I delighted in wandering around school with no shoes on one day every other week, then when the first person to notice would say "Hey, you're not wearing any shoes" or "Where've your shoes gone?" I'd pretend I was distressed that I'd lost them and hadn't realised.

Also, any time I went in during the holidays (usually to pick up art stuff) I would have to make up a new reason why I was actually there if the head came out and asked me what I was doing there. One time I said I'd come to steal the silver and then take over the school in a military style coup.
( Hampster Squared has stuff at www.tilla.co.uk, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:38, Reply)

This is a customer announcement...
I work in Sainsburys and whenever the tannoy thing goes 'Ding Dong' i have to say to myself 'This is a penis announcement' just before the person on the tannoy says 'this is a customer/colleuge announcement...'.

Sainsburys does strange things to a boy.
(Willis86, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:21, Reply)

National Traditions
We have a weird national tradition of saving cheese-eating surrender monkeys from sausage and kraut swilling Germans.

And they seem to have a similar natural fixation on hating us for it.

No apologies...
( Citadel Because the world needs less morons, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:20, Reply)

Hearses and White Rabbits
My friend had a tradition where, on seeing a hearse, he would hold his collar until he saw a dog. His mum passed that on to him.

My mum has a thing where on the first of the month the first thing out of your mouth should be 'White Rabbit' to get good luck for the rest of the month. If you failed, you had to say 'Black Horse' as quickly as possible.

Actually, these, and many other posts, are more like superstitions than traditions... Hmmm...
(kiwanotree Meh, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 18:01, Reply)

Death at sea!
I have a small group of friends who, when we're out on the piss, won't toast each successive pint with your standard "cheers/skol/prosit/etc.", but with "Death at Sea!" Well - everyone knows that if you don't say "Death at Sea" when toasting your mates, someone dies at sea.

Try it - it'll make you feel all altruistic.



*modestly waves away gratitude of countless thousands of sailors
(ring-finger is also a verb, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:56, Reply)

Name Calling
For as long as I can remember, my brother, sister and I have called each other by only the same two names between the three of us. The person coming into a room (the initiator) says 'Hiya Smell(s)' while the residents of a room (the recipients) reply 'Hiya Ugly'. They will be known by those names as long as the scene or episode lasts (e.g. "Do you want some tea, Ugly?" "Love some, Smell"). This also works for emails and telephone calls.
(ShockerMocker, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:40, Reply)

Simon Groom
Me, my mate Stu and his young boys 'special mental image' elder sister Emma.

No idea how it started but every time Simon Groom (children's TV presenter of the early 80's) appeared on screen, if you looked at him for more than 3 seconds you had to (ever more theatrically) writhe and scream in mock agony clutching at your throat, whist dragging your convulsing body toward the waste paper basket in the corner of the room. Upon arrival at which you had to take the drama to new heights and hawk up the most enormous and over the top grolly possible and flob it in the bin.

We were all of 7!?

good-bye...
(Malcolm the Manatee, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:39, Reply)

Shouting at cyclists
My uncle always shouts Allez Ed at cyclists. So now so do all my family. I have no idea why, but it is lots of fun when going skiing and driving up the mountains.
My school also had that thing about prefects growing beards and smoking pipes and the headboy could have a goat on the headmasters lawn. BWS in Salisbury if any one cares.
(d4vestar, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:37, Reply)

breath holding
I've no idea why, but a friend of mine told me it was lucky to hold your breath when you go through a tunnel.

I started doing it and now I can't stop. Road tunnels and train tunnels.

So far I've managed to avoid having to use the Channel Tunnel
(inflateable, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:30, Reply)

I am a member of an "extreme sports" club
which has over the past 21 years developed the excellent tradition of the Pink Pimms Party. This involves large numbers of people convening in a field in Oxford on May Morning, from 7am in the morning. These people will all arrive wearing head to toe pink, and bearing a bottle of Pimms, which is entered into a vat of lemonade, fruit, and more Pimms. The aforementioned tasty beverage is consumed throughout the day, during which the following will at some point occur:

- Bridge swinging
- Dancing round a maypole
- Firing spud guns at passing punts (and on one occasion, Jeremy Paxman)
- Setting fire to a Christmas tree
- Death slides
- Dry ice bombs

..basically continuing until everyone passes out. Juvenile? perhaps. Fun? very much so.
( tipassoi, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:29, Reply)

My new tradition
is to try and get a flat and never get any.
0-2 for the fucking landlords.
Sorry for the rank.
( liverbird, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:28, Reply)

Weird traditions/habits
This seems to be drifting off to personal foibles, so what the hell.

Every time I see a small lamb I try to give it a hint of its' future. How? By yelling "Mint sauce" really loudly at it. They all seem to run away in fear... but I'm not sure if they understand what is being bellowed, more just afraid of my general shoutiness. I never counted bridges though, but my family does have the champagne cork and the first to see the sea traditions... always good.

Working in a summer camp, we have lots of silly traditions. My personal favourite is the singing right at the end of evening activities when we send the kids off to bed, where we sing the camp alma mater, then a little declaration of how we will always be friends, and then another little ditty basically getting the kids in the frame of mind for sleep. The thing about the last one is that it has arm movements, not unlike YMCA (well, it amuses me). The kids also have to line up for dinner, and on Saturday mornings it is tradition for them to have smoked salmon and bagels. Makes a change from pancakes, I guess. One among the counsellors here though is to teach the kids really rude things, without telling them the meaning behind it. My personal contribution to this is teaching the kids the move from "The Spiderman". I now have a division full of kids yelling "GO WEB GO!".

University traditions... well there is the annual piss up known as term time. Wednesday night was drinking night, although come to think of it, so was every other night. Let's just say at uni it was traditional to remain constantly

Legless

(sorry)
( jim_bob can herd cats., Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:20, Reply)

When you have kids...
you develop the most bizarre traditions. Whenever we drive past an automatic car wash, someone needs to inform my wife whether or not the door is open. "Mamma, car wash door's open!"

This has its roots in an incident years ago where Setimrette wanted to wash the car, and sent one of the kids into the gas station to ask about it. They were told that they would have to enter the code on the reciept when they paid for the wash.

I still don't know why that was funny enough to make it into family legend, or why it was funny enough to post as an answer to this question.
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:14, Reply)

Well,,,
THeres the mini game - every time you see a mini cooper you have to shout the colour. First one to shout it out gets to punch everyone else. My mum is fantastic at this for some reason. Also every time i see a lone magpie i have to salute it - "hello Mr magpie, how's your lady wife" Oh yeah, at school we used to have to stand when the head came on stage, then we would sing a hymn...then we could sit down when told to....on one occasion she didn't tell us to sit down.....so we didn't. For 20 mins. And she didn't fucking notice.
(visceralvixen, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:14, Reply)

Witches and Judith from Tomorrows World
When at first school, it was tradition when practising handwriting to close up the gaps in the 'a's or 'g's because, according to the senile old bint-of-a-teacher and I quote "the witches will get out". I shit myself for years.

Also, twas tradition between me and my brother, when watching Tomorrows World in the early 80's, to SPIN AROUND REALLY FAST whenever Judith did her talky-talky bits. We didnt like her and this seemed like the perfect way to waste time until Maggie Philbin or the bloke got back on.

Thanks for reading the length, sorry about the girth.
(haf, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:12, Reply)

A few more
At High School, the same as the yellow car game but substitute them for late 80's British Gas van's.

Touching a button when an ambulance goes past with its siren on, got this one from an ex and can't stop doing it.

Being first to shout shotgun when walking back to a friends car and thus securing the front seat for the drive home, this is more fun when lashed and a brawl ensues.
(El Cabron, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 17:03, Reply)

Knives/coppers
You have to give them the coppers so you bought the knife - if you give someone a knife it cuts the ties of friendship/family/whatever... Oh and also to poke holes in the bottom of your eggshells (crazy people!)
(Mademoiselle_violette, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 16:54, Reply)

Coppering Up
having just bought a house, i had to give numberous family members 1p or 2p if they bought me any knives. not too sure why, brings good luck or something?!

Got loads of champagne corks with coins in too.
(bectoria, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 16:50, Reply)

DrSchnauss/everyone/Dentressangle!
Hmmm, interesting DrSchnauss... My company works with them too. I giggled when I got told and all the French ppl looked at me like I was insane.

There were lots of letters about the Dentressangle thing months and months ago in The Guardian, one family used it to keeps the children quiet on long family drives telling them they were 'Norbert Deathstrangler' lorries to punish noisy kids... Lovely!
(Mademoiselle_violette, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 16:46, Reply)

Jesus Saves
I've just remembered my odd tradition.

I used to drive between the Midlands and London quite a bit. On my way back from London up the M1 there was some graffiti on a M'Way bridge, it read "Jesus Saves".

My tradition was to shout "Jesus Saves!! But Moses gets it on the rebound". It left a glowing feeling in my tum knowing I was only 1/2 hour away from home.

(PS don't do this in a car full it scared my passenger).

And with that my B3TA cherry explodes in a red soggy mess.
(YellowZed, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 16:43, Reply)