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gah, job interviews are evil.
got into the third and final round of two people out of 200+ applications, so I was told.

The other guy is AFTER me so they can't tell me if I have the job or not yet, they tell me tomorrow.

It's keeping an idiot in suspense!


Someone near me is eating pickled onion snacks. They're vile.
What can you smell?
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:46, archived)
in b4
your mum
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:47, archived)
*rearranges words*
in your mum b4
(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:47, archived)
who's mum?

(I helped save b3ta! Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:48, archived)
Fish and cucmber
with a hint of mayo
(I helped save b3ta! M o D, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:47, archived)
Wet dog and beans on toast.

(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:47, archived)
Nothing. I'm all bunged up.

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:48, archived)
COFFEE AND CHOCOLATE
I'm the birthday fucking queen
(I helped save b3ta! The Baroness The Harlot Pimpernel, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:48, archived)
Happy birthday! I hope you're skiving work today.
I have chocolate too. *choco-fives*
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Todd whee, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:52, archived)
Sadly not, skiving on Saturday tho, :)
*chocoTENS!*
(I helped save b3ta! The Baroness The Harlot Pimpernel, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:54, archived)
You only fuck on birthdays?
yours or other peoples? It could get quite irritating if it was only once a year.
(loutre I've said too much, been too unkind, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:53, archived)
I've like the birthday sex fairy
I creep into your bedroom on your birthday and rape you til you like it.
(I helped save b3ta! The Baroness The Harlot Pimpernel, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:56, archived)
blimey.
*deactivates PANDA alarm*

*puts birthday in profile casually*

*reactivates PANDA alarm*
(loutre I've said too much, been too unkind, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:59, archived)
*luffs*

(I helped save b3ta! The Baroness The Harlot Pimpernel, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:59, archived)
Rain and that shampooey smell of just-washed hair.

(I helped save b3ta! Bob Todd whee, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:48, archived)
whose hair are you sniffing your pervert?

(I helped save b3ta! Damion International - now taking orders., Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:50, archived)
it's not actually attached to anyone
it's just a pile of washed hair
(I helped save b3ta! Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:51, archived)

with poo in...
(I helped save b3ta! Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:51, archived)
DAYS?!?

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:52, archived)
Obvious LOL strikethrough
sham of just washed hair
(I helped save b3ta! M o D, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:51, archived)
Boycott shampoo!
Demand real poo!
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Todd whee, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:53, archived)
Awful

(I helped save b3ta! Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:48, archived)
Pffft

(I helped save b3ta! The Baroness The Harlot Pimpernel, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:49, archived)
Aren't you drunk yet?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:52, archived)
Not yet
7:45pm = malibu o' clock...

BEFORE EVERYONE WHINGES ABOUT MALIBU!!!

I need to be relatively sober and I can't trust myself with wine or vodka or beer.
(I helped save b3ta! The Baroness The Harlot Pimpernel, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:55, archived)
Third round seems excessive to me,
although Spacefish tells me of a guy he knows who once had to go through five rounds, because he's an HR professional who knows all the textbook answers and it took them that long to get a genuine one out of him.

It's competition in the job market that does it, of course. If only 20 people went for every job instead of 200, the selection process wouldn't take nearly as long.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:49, archived)
HR professional
is the biggest fucking oxymoron out there.

HR exists solely to employ people whose only skills are gossip and backstabbing.

Edit - and your last point isn't true, takes about an hour to whittle 200 CVs down to the 20 that you might consider pissing on if they were on fire, let alone employing.

If an employment agency sent any CVs, that saves even more time, as they can just go straight in the bin.
(loutre I've said too much, been too unkind, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:52, archived)
ha
why does anyone even bother using an agency? I haven't heard much good about them from either side of the deal.

Still, don't you think employers are a lot more fussy than they used to be? Presumably because now they DO get that many applicants.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:57, archived)
Mrs HoodButter works in HR...

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:58, archived)
does she gossip and backstab?
I'm sure there are some lovely people in HR. Sadly, all the ones I've ever met have been arseholes. And I've met a lot.

I just think there is some mental shortcircuit somewhere that would make you want to work in a job which is essentially nosing round in other peoples problems. Not massively generalising or anything.
(loutre I've said too much, been too unkind, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:03, archived)
see also: civil servants.

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:08, archived)
Presumably it'd take even less time to whittle twenty CVs down to two?

(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:59, archived)
I think once you've got it down to 20,
you could probably just as well pick one at random, phone them up and offer them the job there and then.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:01, archived)
Nah
20 would be those I'd consider talking to. I might interview 5. I agree it's possible that by missing out the other 15, I might miss someone brilliant who happens to have a shit CV. but, if you're that good and you can't even do a CV properly, why would I want to employ you?
(loutre I've said too much, been too unkind, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:05, archived)
unless the job is writing CVs,
I don't see why it matters.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:07, archived)
because it matters if you want the job or not
if you produce a poor CV, then you either aren't bothered enough about the job to adapt your CV for it, or you don't know how to write a CV for a specific job, which is a fairly basic skill (and if you lack that fairly basic skill, what else do you lack)

It's not rocket science. Even for a basic admin job as you mention, all else being equal you'll take the applicant that actually looks like they give a shit. So if you lead your CV with your education details or whatever, who cares? put the relevant stuff first. Experience, office skills, etc etc.
(loutre I've said too much, been too unkind, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:14, archived)
It's possibly a bit subjective as to what constitutes a "good" CV,
but all the same. If people weren't expected to apply for 100 jobs a week, they might only apply for the ones they actually wanted and thought they'd be good at. People only waste so much paper because of the constant accusation that they're not making enough effort unless they're making as much or more than everybody else. And of course if you're sending off that many, you can't possibly be putting that much care and attention into each of them.

It's not always easy to know exactly what the employer wants either, sometimes the job descriptions can be very brief. It's a bit of pot luck a lot of the time.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:18, archived)
I suppose that's a point, certainly

(loutre I've said too much, been too unkind, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:24, archived)
Possibly.
Chances are that if the job is worth having there will be double figures number of applicants who are worth serious consideration, and the rest are just wasting trees. But, it does vary a lot.
(loutre I've said too much, been too unkind, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:01, archived)
for really basic admin work
that pretty much anyone who can write and count could do, I don't know why they have to make such a meal out of it. But even those jobs involve a second round of interviews these days.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:03, archived)
there was a QOTW answer that I read once
That explained how someone had suggested to their boss when going through CV's that they split them in to two piles and throw half away with out reading them , so as to save time and make sure they don't accidently hire any unlucky people.
(I helped save b3ta! Damion International - now taking orders., Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:52, archived)
yes, I've heard that sort of thing.
there is really no advantage to society for people to apply for more and more jobs all the time. There's still only going to be one person who gets the job no matter how many people apply.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:54, archived)
Did Ricky Gervais post that answer?

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:56, archived)
when I worked for [name of major ISP based in Rochdale]
they used to go through the pile of CVs and throw away applications from anyone with a foreign-sounding name
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:59, archived)
The first one was with their HR director to say hi
second with their network administrator, and last one with their head of IT.

Quite fun though, that I have got this far and it's a good wage.
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:59, archived)
well good luck and that.
I'm sure you've done very well.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 13:04, archived)
Bacon,
I just had a bacon sandwich.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:50, archived)
no

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:50, archived)
Fried egg sandwiches
Now I'm going to replace it with the soothing aroma of tea. Then I may contemplate changing my facebook status.
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:51, archived)
What the Rock is cooking

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:51, archived)
This made me smile

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:52, archived)
I can't smell anything much
because of this damned hayfever
(Dangermouse., Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:52, archived)