How do you be so short?

( Comma, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:24, archived)

Did you get your
message from hoohah yet?

www.b3ta.com/talk/620841
( Dekazer, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:26, archived)

ive already dampened the cloth
And am biding my time
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:28, archived)

are you a priest?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:48, archived)

An acolyte of Cthulhu possibly

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 15:02, archived)

H.P. Lovecraft
Perhaps ?
(Experiment 626, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 15:05, archived)

Eehs,
Ahhs,
I don't know...
( Comma, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:29, archived)

*dons comma outfit*
*goes off to meet hoohah*
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:33, archived)

You keep your filthy hands off her.
She's alll mine.
( Comma, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:35, archived)

I dunno, shes probably only a matter of a few streets away from me
and her all alone in the scary city of Oxford....
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:36, archived)

i thought you were in oxford?
ninja bastard
( Ibstock, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:37, archived)

It wouldn't be half as scary
if it didn't have you in it.
( Comma, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:43, archived)

But thats the fun part:)

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:44, archived)

Give it back to Don
© 2002
( Newington, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:40, archived)

Cut your fucking legs off, thicko.

(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:26, archived)

Circular saw to the kneecaps,
did the trick for me.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:26, archived)

We have to stop meeting like this.

(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:28, archived)

Perhaps we're soulmates?
:¬P
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:31, archived)

Comma! Comma!
Hoohah said she's never coming to Oxford again so don't bother calling her.

www.b3ta.com/talk/620841
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:27, archived)

I beat you
I'm the more caring, efficient, helpful and wonderful b3tan ever. So there.

*sigh* I think I'm bored today.
( Dekazer, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:30, archived)

Are you still bleeding from the cunt?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:35, archived)

That's no way to talk about Fenris!
Tsk.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:36, archived)

Hahahaha
thank you :)
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 15:01, archived)

"Victim of domestic violence?
Still bleeding from the cunt?

Call Mykey's Domestic Violence Helpline and be told to shut up or you'll get another one."
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:37, archived)

They only get the bruises if they have to be told twice
I sure you dealt a few blows to missus catfish when you rolled in drunk the other night, and no doubt she deserved it!
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:41, archived)

Too right.
Bitch was askin' too many question and had to give her a slap.

"Did you have a nice time?"
"Do you want another drink or would you rather go to bed?"
"Do you mind if I fetch an attractive female friend round and we have a threesome?"

Too many questions...
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:46, archived)

If she werent knocked up
I would ask to borrow your wife sir.
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:47, archived)

You, sir,
are showing an unhealthy obsession with ladies' reproductive cycles.
( Dekazer, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:50, archived)

Pssst!



I find it better than hurling abuse at minorities.
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:53, archived)

This is true
and women deserve all the abuse they get
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 15:06, archived)

You did. Yesterday.

Well, you offered your services to knock her up again, anyway...

She declined, by the way.
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:51, archived)

I'm going to
send you a package one of these days.
( Dekazer, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:42, archived)

As shall i madam
As shall i..
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:43, archived)

Sandpaper
on the headboard of my bed.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:28, archived)

At a cousin's wedding when I was younger,
we noticed that said cousin was a little thin on top. Dad turns to me and whispers "denim headboard" - I had to think about it for a while!
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:32, archived)

OK
I give up. EH??
( Dekazer, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 15:00, archived)

I dunno, I just am...
it makes buying trousers difficult because apparently you can only have short legs if you are also fat or really really skinny...at least in Slough anyway...

anyway, its useful cos I'm just the right size to hide in people's pockets...
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:29, archived)

All fat people have short legs.
Surely you knew this?
( toxie, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:31, archived)

well yes
but I'm not particularly fat and I need trousers too and I can't sew to save my life (not even with a sweing machine) which pretty much puts just taking up a hem out...
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:44, archived)

And everyone over 6'2
is a greedy fat cunt.

/things I have learned while clothes shopping
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:47, archived)

I learnt that any women over 5'8''
are under a size 16.
madness.
( toxie, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:51, archived)

Whereas
for some unknown reason, most size 10 clothes are the right length for Dutch women, but God knows who else.
( Dekazer, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:56, archived)

And any men under 5' are Oompa Loompas

( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:57, archived)

Orange?

( Dekazer, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:58, archived)

The future's bright,
the future's Veritas?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 6 Jul 2005, 14:59, archived)