I'm baking a cake.
a whole cake. this is the first time I've baked a whole cake and not just batches of fairy cakes or muffins before. I'm not entirely convinced I'll know when it's cooked in the middle. I won't know until tomorrow when it gets cut (gannet's birthday) if the marbling has worked (trial run for the ratbag's birthday cake).
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:07, archived)

poke a knife into it
if it comes out clean it's cooked, if it comes out with cake mixture on it, it's not.
( asparagus time Is in Brazil., Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:08, archived)

is it likely to sink
if I do that before it's cooked? fairy cakes only take 10-15 minutes to cook, I'm assuming a whole cake takes a lot longer
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:11, archived)

I work on about 20-30 mins
always seems to work...
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:16, archived)

B3ta/talk is so edgy. it pushes the boundaries of good taste.
i mean... marbling.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:09, archived)

she wants a pink cake
so I'm compromising with pink marbling
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:10, archived)

mr kipling does a cracking cherry bakewell.
and could save you hours in which you could do something less devestatingly domestic.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:11, archived)

no no no
the best birthday cakes are made by your mum, you can't have a cherry bakewell as a birthday cake! philistine.
( Fergburger, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:13, archived)

this
I loved the birthday cakes my mum used to make, and bought cakes just don't have that delicious crunchy top under the icing

I will also be experimenting with making pink butter icing using Crusha
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:15, archived)

this makes me know that at the age of 28
i am at least 15 years off the possibility of having kids.

"daddy, will you help me blow out my candles?"
"do it your fucking self, i'm playing poker with the boys. and don't piss yourself tonight as i'm having a threesome with your mum and her bisexual friend and i don't want interruptions from a piss-drenched little shit like you".
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:17, archived)

when *was* the last time you had a threesome
that wasn't in your head?
( blinder back for good, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:20, archived)

never
but at aged 43, the ruined old crones will be gagging for it.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:22, archived)

We all clubbed together so JV could have her sprog's party,
so who reckons we should all chip in to provide dorty bib with a couple of semi-lesbotic hookers?
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:25, archived)

sounds good
can i have a slice please? wrapped up in a piece of kitchen roll in a party bag with a little toy and some sweeties and a balloon? can i, can i, can i, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaase?

/5 year old
( Fergburger, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:20, archived)

I am considering starting to bake things
I think this might make me a homosexualist
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:10, archived)

Well if it's any consolation
I'm a lesbian
( Dugs - The artist formerly known as Dugsybaws, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:10, archived)

Tell me about it.
I could lez for England.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:14, archived)

Try flower arranging
or ballet instead
YOU BIG SHANDY DRINKING PUFFTY.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:12, archived)

no, pushing them into other mens bums with your cock will

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:12, archived)

I don't think there's been much doubt about
your homosexualness for some time.

Now stick your cock back in my bum, there's a good chap.
( Benny on the Loose; a permanent solution to a temporary problem, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:13, archived)

We must go drinking in Reading at some point soon
You poof
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:16, archived)

I shall be at a shindig in Reading this very Friday.
Unfortunately, my diary is full every weekend after that until the beginning of August....
( Benny on the Loose; a permanent solution to a temporary problem, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:18, archived)

stick a skewer in it
if it's got gooey cake on it it's not ready, if it comes out clean it's cooked
( Fergburger, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:10, archived)

use a stick, and poke it

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:10, archived)

Ask a suitably endowed male friend
to stick his cock into it. If he gives a litte wry grin of pleasure, and a bit of a grunt, then it's cooked to perfection.
( Benny on the Loose; a permanent solution to a temporary problem, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:10, archived)

plus
free icing!
( chobb ,ø¤ºGREATº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRAPISTº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRECOMMENDEDº¤ø, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:12, archived)

Yay!
Extra protein for the kiddies.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:13, archived)

and it's then
creamed as well....

can I have a slice when it's cooked*?



_{*I don't want any of the cream though}
( umbongo I vote for Evil Lu as Mayor of /talk, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:13, archived)

that's how to tell when it's cocked
not when it's cooked. but I can see where you got confused
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 11 Jul 2005, 16:17, archived)