Hi scrotum's, hows it going
Another glorious day here in glamorous Chelsea. Might go for a pizza l8r

Prolly perform an alliterative sex act on an as-yet unspecified animal
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 11:19, archived)

up-the-arse an ungulate

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 11:33, archived)

nosh off a narwhal

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:17, archived)

Muffdive a marmoset.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:18, archived)

tease a weasel

( vladimir, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 16:21, archived)

Might pork a porcupine.
*lascivious wink*
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:18, archived)

Might tittyfuck mr. teacup chihuahua.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:37, archived)

Might dock with a dik-dik

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 13:01, archived)

Might rectum-wreck a reticulated python

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 13:26, archived)

Dr. Lascivious Wink MD

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 13:12, archived)

Might aanally aassault an aardvark

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 13:02, archived)

Celery, celery. Old football chant for the kids out there

( mongychops, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 11:43, archived)

I'm struggling to see the football angle here, to be honest.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 25 Jul 2026, 11:57, archived)

Celery and Chelsea. was an old chant. Probably 80s.
Celery, celery, if she don't come I'll tickle her bum with a lump of celery
Celery Celery...
( mongychops, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:00, archived)

Oh well that makes perfect sense now that you've explained it.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:20, archived)

STICK of celery is the version I learned. Heartening to recall how the terraces put female pleasure at the heart of things back in the day. It really was like wall-to-wall erica jong out there
( vladimir, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 16:21, archived)

A deeper dive into the bottomless pit of weirdness that is football.
( .Yeti., Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:14, archived)

Lol bottom

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:18, archived)

heh, lol

( .Yeti., Sat 25 Jul 2026, 12:19, archived)

Going to see my mate today
It's the first time we've had his late husband's birthday since he died
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 13:14, archived)

There are so many 'firsts' to get through eh
First Xmas, birthday etc

Fucking tough
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 13:43, archived)

Wham!'zzz

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 13:46, archived)

Wham! New Kids on the Block
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 15:05, archived)

Yeah
Definitely not a day to leave him on his own
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 15:41, archived)

Liverpool bollocks

( Cheers Cheers, Sat 25 Jul 2026, 14:06, archived)