teh lol

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 16:02, archived)

alrite

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 16:36, archived)

y

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 16:58, archived)

gud gud ttfn

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:43, archived)

wanker

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 16:38, archived)

prick

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 16:52, archived)

bit rude m8

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:08, archived)

fuck off

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:33, archived)

suck my balls

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:40, archived)

i refuse.

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:43, archived)

group hug?

(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:44, archived)

no fingerbum?

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:45, archived)

I’m afraid not

(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:46, archived)

not interested then

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:46, archived)

I can tickle your hoop for £20 if you like?

(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:48, archived)

go on then

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:54, archived)

🤏📯
(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 18:20, archived)

What have we learned?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 21:47, archived)

fuck all as usual

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 21:50, archived)

It’s the journey

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 23:26, archived)

It’s the friends we made along the way

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 23:26, archived)

It’s Literally Hitler and Carol Vordeman’s Arse trading homoerotic insults on a moribund flebsite

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 23:31, archived)

what a time to be alive

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 6 Aug 2020, 11:09, archived)

been eating asparagus, looking forward to having a stinky wee in a bit

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 16:51, archived)

you can pee into a flask and put it beside the bed in case you get a thirst on in the... wee hours!

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 16:53, archived)

idgi

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 16:58, archived)

have some red wine for dark poo too

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:04, archived)

I also recommend beetrot. it gets the job done

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:35, archived)

i don't often have an excuse to eat beetroot but i do now

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 18:46, archived)

w00t

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:04, archived)

houpla

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 20:41, archived)

hello fellow internet forum user

(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 17:44, archived)

hello to you in return, wonderful /chattist

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 20:41, archived)

t’hello

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 6 Aug 2020, 5:13, archived)

morning

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 6:34, archived)

Yep.
Absolutely shattered after having to do a day's work yesterday, so am going to laze about today and do some serious daytime drinking. I should be shouting at postboxes by lunchtime.
(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 7:20, archived)

“You’re a postbox!!”

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 21:49, archived)

morning arse

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 8:05, archived)

what do you do for a living that necessitates multiple visits to court?
if you don't mind me asking of course
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 9:04, archived)

no worries, when i was a yoot i used to work as a rent boy in brentford
used to get a load of trade from judges at isleworth crown court
( broadsword w⚓, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 9:15, archived)

well
i did ask i suppose!
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 9:26, archived)

to this day I can't hear the phrase 'all rise in court' without shuddering a little

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 9:28, archived)

hahaha!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 9:31, archived)

that's more of a lee mack joke

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 11:13, archived)

no real names pls

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 11:45, archived)

sorry i forget myself sometimes

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 13:53, archived)

Say it again

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 11:50, archived)

Fucking hell I bet your hourly rate was low
Brentford’s a scumhole
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 19:43, archived)

goedemorgen!
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 8:08, archived)

morning

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 8:32, archived)

I've got my own office now
what do people with their own offices do? can i wank in it?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 5 Aug 2020, 9:45, archived)

i mean, yeah, but it gets boring very quickly
to keep it interesting you can mark on the wall how far up you can hit, make little targets around the office, that sorta thing
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 9:50, archived)

Lock the door first
Otherwise you will have feminists complaining. But if you are a lady you don't have to. Are you?
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 10:53, archived)

Maybe

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 5 Aug 2020, 12:07, archived)

Morning

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Wed 5 Aug 2020, 10:25, archived)

there's an actual town in america named 'bald knob'

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 23:17, archived)

there is something in your pants you call
, you mean
( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 23:21, archived)

Bald Knob
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 23:24, archived)

You know when you're sitting on the bog while cleaning your teeth? Well
Do you prefer the way a fart gently permeates your nostrils, and gradually fills your mouth as you breathe in, or do you prefer to do a massive inhale so you get the full effect over the fresh taste of toothpaste?
(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 23:31, archived)

bit personal

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 23:32, archived)

Best of all the original internet singles ads.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 23:42, archived)

been using it for ages

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 23:55, archived)

Have you ever been to court?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 18:23, archived)

no

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 18:25, archived)

yeah

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 18:34, archived)

liar

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 18:59, archived)

alrite i haven't then

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:05, archived)

sustained

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:09, archived)

i have tho

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:11, archived)

take the fifth!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:17, archived)

what did you do?
did you merk some blads?
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:23, archived)

i punched a lizard in the gizzards

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:38, archived)

oooo kinky!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:39, archived)

Yes. Once as a defendant (16 years old, gave my girlfriend a lift on the back of my moped while I still had L plates on) and twice as a witness.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:00, archived)

lol i flipped my bike into an oncoming bus and never went to court over it you unlucky twunt

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:07, archived)

When I said moped, I meant sweet Harley, and when I said the other stuff I actually meant I was doing something very illegal and dangerous but they had to let me go because I’m a secret agent but I had to go to court as part of the cover-up

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:13, archived)

that makes more sense

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:23, archived)

Sorry I can’t discuss it publicly

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:24, archived)

Piss of plod

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:16, archived)

snitches get stitches
also points make prizes
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:24, archived)

you're not tending to this thread like you ought to be, young man

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:30, archived)

i'm in the last 50 out of a field of 6000 in poker

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:51, archived)

take them to the fucking cleaners

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:59, archived)

Are you sure? Like, you’re all at a big table together? Do you all get one card each or what?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:09, archived)

top 11 now

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:17, archived)

ahh i finished in 10th place
not too bad
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:21, archived)

Have you ever won?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:27, archived)

i have in smaller online tournies and in live games but not in online tournies that size
best i've come is 5th in a field of 18000

i didn't get to the final table, tables are 9 players so there was 5 on one and 5 on another, when i went out it would go down to the final table
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:34, archived)

no

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 19:43, archived)

Yep - jury service.
Brilliant fun.
(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:15, archived)

Yes, 3/4 times
Just to watch
( Cassius Kray floats like a butterfly, stings like a trout, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 20:24, archived)

Yeah loads, occupational hazard innit

( broadsword w⚓, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 22:15, archived)

of being a crime inal?

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 23:06, archived)

Rabid Rodent hasn't.
(Ooooh_cuntroversials_sockpuppet Make O/T great again., Wed 5 Aug 2020, 0:00, archived)

2D PLATFORMERS THREAD!!!!!

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:13, archived)

SUPER MARIO WORLD OR GTFO

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:20, archived)

whoops, did everyone gtfo?

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:31, archived)

Arcade or shitty console games ?

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:35, archived)

Neo-Geo

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:47, archived)

metal slug obvs

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 16:54, archived)

The Peter Kay of threads
Chuckie Egg 2.
(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:45, archived)

Manic Miner

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 16:57, archived)

super crate box

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 17:36, archived)

SHITCOCK'S
hullo
( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 11:04, archived)

hi queef lol how r u lol

( broadsword w⚓, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 11:10, archived)

gud m8 lol u

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 11:27, archived)

lol im gud 2 rofl

( broadsword w⚓, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 11:43, archived)

lol

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:07, archived)

Hahaha how do you guys think of this stuff?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:50, archived)

lol dunno lmao

( broadsword w⚓, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:51, archived)

lol nice 1

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 14:45, archived)

alright

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 11:17, archived)

y

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:08, archived)

the a-team's on paramount
plus some juvenile long-tailed tits have been eating the sawfly larva on the goat willow just outside the living room window
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 11:21, archived)

lol tits

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:08, archived)

ikr?! lmao!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:11, archived)

How dreadful

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:08, archived)

dread wonder
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:12, archived)

We only seem to get LTTs in the garden during the winter.
I've seen them in the summer too, they're in the woods about 500 metres away, but obviously they don't like to build nests here. Perhaps the sparrows are too ghastly for them.
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:52, archived)

it depends how invertebrate rich your garden is really, like all Tits they swap their diet in the winter to seeds and berries. we've got a lot of willow scrub and british wildflowers so there's plenty of everything for the locals!
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:57, archived)

Plenty of trees and flowering plants for the insects, the coal/blue/great tits all seem happy to raise their young here.
I really do think it's because the long-tailed ones are terrible snobs and don't like associating with more common birds.
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:07, archived)

hahah prissy little bastards!
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:11, archived)

Don't get me wrong, they're extremely cute, but they're completely up themselves.

(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:22, archived)

i would be if i looked like that

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 15:26, archived)

goat willow, goat won’tow

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:51, archived)

the contrary shrub
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:59, archived)

hi

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 11:22, archived)

hullo doc hows the family lol

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:08, archived)

kids are being pricks, I'm blaming lockdown but could just be my poor parenting.

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:01, archived)

Bit insulting to the buggers

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 11:56, archived)

Your face, you mean

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:10, archived)

I have a lovely face "Dicky"
Noble yet unassuming
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:26, archived)

Pfft - 'nob'

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:20, archived)

U

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:29, archived)

Bit bored, might go for a pint

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:28, archived)

good idea

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 12:33, archived)

Restaurants in china town have took over the whole bloody street with tables

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:41, archived)

is wongs still there? that place was great

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 21:05, archived)

No.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:16, archived)

Hello
A month's shopping and bills sorted, now I'm shattered. Bit of cleaning and then settle down to watch Deadpool 2
( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 13:31, archived)

is brb okay i haven't seen him in a while
or maybe i have a mental block
or maybe he has me on lolignore
i dunno. why do all the nutjobs that inject meth into their cocks end up finding /talk? and how? someone must be scribbling the link in snot or blood on the wall of a popular meth den
anyway fuck you etc etc and all that dried spunk
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 23:40, archived)

ok fuck you lot. Good Time is worth a watch. i just watched it. it's on netflix.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 1:14, archived)

No offense Führer, you’re a bit of a spaz m8

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 1:50, archived)

i could take offence to that

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 1:55, archived)

Nah, c’mere you big fascist :)

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 2:30, archived)

i recoil from any kind of affection.

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 2:34, archived)

Affection’s not as turgid as this.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 2:40, archived)

it is in my experience

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 8:00, archived)

hi hitler
what is good time about please?
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 6:44, archived)

it's about crime duo and one of them's a mental

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 18:30, archived)

yes i have seen brb recently so don't worry :)

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 6:45, archived)

phew!
was he in primark?
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 7:59, archived)

no, b3ta! can you believe?

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 8:35, archived)

alright

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 20:44, archived)

Yeah
Peaceful night, just watched the original dawn of the dead and now I'm watching the remake
( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 20:58, archived)

Yeah, just made and ate a really good pizza.
My little boy turns 9 months old tomorrow, so he'll have been "out longer than in", so to speak.
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 22:15, archived)

you make your own pizza? golly!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 6:47, archived)

Is that a question or a statement?

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 22:25, archived)

who the hell are you?

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 22:41, archived)

Well who the devil are you
If you think we're on the run
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 22:44, archived)

i wasn't taking to you fat legs

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 22:46, archived)

i think it's just a general greeting really
the aim is to start a new line of discourse though i'm not sure it really got going this time
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Tue 4 Aug 2020, 6:48, archived)

God bless us one and all
It's a lovely day, the beginning of a new week and I am happy. Is that a crime? How are my /chat chums doing?
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 7:14, archived)

that’s not a crime
but all those murders you done are
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 7:24, archived)

Moi? I Int no murderer

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 7:29, archived)

that’s exactly what a murderer would say
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 7:41, archived)

Back at work.
it's alright
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Aug 2020, 7:56, archived)

Morning wp

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:00, archived)

Morning 🌄 🌅

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:18, archived)

Full time?

(Nicki Minaj, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:28, archived)

Seems so, loads of changes

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:08, archived)

these days, you get arrested and thrown in jail if you say you're happy

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 7:58, archived)

No you don't

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:01, archived)

I did.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:19, archived)

Is that why Pharrell hasn't released any new tracks lately?

( broadsword w⚓, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:38, archived)

Oh My Sweet Lord It’s You! The Super Boring Guy!! 😆 Ha Ha I Am So Excited With Watching Your Character Try To Be Funny Or Conversational And Failing Again! Lol 😂 😂

(Garold Huzzah!, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:19, archived)

This is a story of a woman, fifty. And a chap in his early forties. This woman enraptured this man. Made him feel sixteen again. He thought “I’m gonna wear a t-shirt with Crowded House written on the front of it”. He thought “Yes, I will buy that copy of Punch magazine”.

But then, she committed a gross act upon his person, which was tantamount to vandalism. But he realised that not only must they part company, but that he must also sack her from her job as his receptionist.

I didn’t mention that earlier but part of the problem was that she did work for him and he had to sack her anyway. Anyway, he thanks her for that stolen afternoon. But even that it was stolen, it’s not your property love, You’ve got to give it back. So just to re-emphasize one more time. Her contract HAS been terminated.
(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:38, archived)

Ah haaaaaaa!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:44, archived)

it's not a crime but it is frowned upon
it is a refreshing change to hear that someone is happy though so long may it continue!

i hurt my neck doing archery, i think i might be doing it wrong
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:42, archived)

I can help
˙ǝɹǝɥ sǝsᴉɔɹǝxǝ ʞɔǝu lnɟǝsn ǝɯos puᴉɟ uɐɔ no⅄
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 8:59, archived)

thank you Agent Pr1ck!
that's very helpful of you :)
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:01, archived)

Beautiful day.
Photographing a couple of musicians today (socially distanced, natch).

Then first day of phased return from furlough tomorrow.
(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:00, archived)

it all sounds very noir

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:32, archived)

Not sure, we may need internet lawyerman's advice.
If your post causes someone to reflect on how desperately unhappy they are and they kill themselves would that count as murder or simply manslaughter?
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:01, archived)

is this about brb again?

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:32, archived)

Monday mornings are poo and smell of poo

( broadsword w⚓, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:26, archived)

what kind of poo?

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:33, archived)

the kind that smells like you

( broadsword w⚓, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:43, archived)

Eww, does she not wipe very well?

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 11:02, archived)

v good at maths, v bad at personal hygiene

( broadsword w⚓, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 11:07, archived)

alrite
your medication seems to be working. what you got?
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:35, archived)

Maprotiline, and a KitKat
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:20, archived)

ooh i haven't tried that one. might have a word with my dealer. i bought two multi packs of cookies and cream kitkats in the coop
then i realisd i'm just going eat them all in one sitting because they're too delish

but i couldn't put them back because of the one way sysetm, so i had to buy them. they lasted slightly more than one sitting, but now i have spots :(
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:26, archived)

Chicken coop?
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:40, archived)

i'm sorry my my appalling and upsetting grammar, no i mean co-op the shop

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 12:24, archived)

Eye no

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 13:02, archived)

So you're not a grammar Nazi, just a regular one?

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 13:12, archived)

i'm not all bad

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 13:15, archived)

It is a lovely morning, isn't it?

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 9:48, archived)

dunno haven't opened the blackout blinds yet
not since about 2003, actually
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:16, archived)

It is
And morning
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:21, archived)

Holidayyy, celebra-ate
Looks like a beaut so far. Got the beef ribs on and having a coffee in the garden
( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:05, archived)

Foooooooooooood

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:22, archived)

I really want to have a go at doing pork ribs in me pressure cooker.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 12:54, archived)

I’ve got two weeks off
Might infect an Ibis
( Cheers Cheers, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:24, archived)

Just the one week off here so I only have time to slap a sloth :(

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:32, archived)

Sad times :’(

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:33, archived)

get stuck in to Zelda m8

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 10:49, archived)

Go old school and play ocarina of time

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 11:38, archived)

nah, the best ones are Wind Waker and Breath of the Wild.
Still need to play through Majora's Mask and Skyward Sword.
(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 11:42, archived)

Bored?
Here
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:17, archived)

I still am

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:20, archived)

It’s no use just reading it, you have to live it.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:21, archived)

With the greatest respect for the people of Manassas
I'd need a LOT of meth, butt prostitutes and pizza to stop me from killing myself if I lived there for more than 5 minutes
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:27, archived)

In fairness I think that’s true of most of the people who find themselves stuck in Manassas

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:46, archived)

lol gay!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:52, archived)

Well, yes, quite.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:56, archived)

90% of b3ta

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 21:18, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8271024

Yeah I thought Smash said “black sausage” so this link makes little to no sense soz
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:59, archived)

Ohhhhh
Tad racist though
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 21:12, archived)

?
Can we not?
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 21:15, archived)

I'm bored
but not that bored.
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 21:17, archived)

Due to the travel ban I cant go, siz

(Nicki Minaj, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 21:45, archived)

Try screaming at some airport staff about your rights

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 21:55, archived)

idgi

(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 22:12, archived)

I’m thinking of investing in a confectionary-packaging venture there

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 22:19, archived)

goo.gl/maps/9po9KrprqTD8J9mZ7
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 22:42, archived)

HISANUS

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 3 Aug 2020, 2:32, archived)

Yes.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 23:02, archived)

Bored dot com eh internet creakies

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 23:21, archived)

Rude glass man is on Antiques Roadshow!
Have you got any antiques in the attic worth anything?
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:12, archived)

Who?

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:21, archived)

Rude glass man

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:25, archived)

Rude glass?
GC m8
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:34, archived)

Teh Glasscock!!!

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 22:45, archived)

No

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:21, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8271135
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:46, archived)

Yes

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 22:32, archived)

morning

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:07, archived)

morning

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:14, archived)

Go away

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:18, archived)

go lock and bolt the doors to your shit pub, then set it on fire with you and your family inside it

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:25, archived)

Already done
Thankfully I survived
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:31, archived)

Kiddo loves that Zelda game, nice 1 lol

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:24, archived)

YOUR WELCOME

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:25, archived)

morning

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:16, archived)

Nods

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:18, archived)

alright Cheers

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:25, archived)

alright, Cheers

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 18:02, archived)

Alright
Smoke anything nice yesterday? Food I mean
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:18, archived)

Yep, Aaron Franklin's pork ribs, two types of wings (buffalo and Kansas style sweet bbq)
Chicken tikka drumsticks on the kettle grill. I also made Hummus Beiruti which I was super pleased with although vv garlicky. Fantastic day manning the fire with jr. Then we watched Scoob! in the evening
( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:24, archived)

We have some venison mince coming today, so it's posh nommy burger making in a bit
That did sound very nice though
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:33, archived)

Ooh, mince.

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:38, archived)

Yes popular poster "Frankie Howard"

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:50, archived)

it was a Partridge reference YOU FUCKING FLID

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 9:16, archived)

Howerd

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 9:16, archived)

Pretty meated out after yesterday, might postpone beef ribs til 2moz
I think I'll make falafels for lunch and halloumi kebabs with Turkish rice for dinner
( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 9:11, archived)

Lol gay

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 10:22, archived)

no u

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 11:06, archived)

Posh? It’s roadkill.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 22:00, archived)

Alright

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:40, archived)

alright

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:47, archived)

Hello CVA/D°z°r

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 10:06, archived)

Morning

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:50, archived)

Good hello NSW

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 10:06, archived)

Hullo

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 9:08, archived)

Guten Tag, Herr QR.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 10:07, archived)

What ho!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 11:38, archived)

I enjoy saying "Rather!" when agreeing, to make people like D*z*r twitch.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 12:19, archived)

I shall add that to my regular lexicon

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 14:22, archived)

Chin chin

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 13:09, archived)

Two pints of cider, ice in the cider

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 14:06, archived)

Top hole!

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 14:23, archived)

Bottom hole!

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 18:42, archived)

Milk milk lemonade, around the corner fudge is made

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 20:10, archived)

Morning
Best sleep I've had in years, completely wiped out for 15 hours
( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 11:55, archived)

Oh wow!
I haven't had a sleepathon in years
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 12:10, archived)

It was unintentional
But much needed. Great dream, too, kind of a midwich cuckoos/ stepford wives crossover with me as the leader of the resistance, fighting against the brainwashing
( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 12:40, archived)

So good drugs then?

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 13:10, archived)

Mirtazipine
They give me fantastically weird dreams
( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 13:17, archived)

I dreamed I was with my dad in a DIY shop
I rather think you got the better deal!
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 14:24, archived)

i always have dreams like that
partly due to the amount of horror films i watch and partly due to the sleeping pills
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 14:31, archived)

Hmmm yeah I was a regular taker of zopiclone
That made for interesting dreams! Incidentally, have you seen Hereditary? I'd like to watch something similar but I find modern horror films a bit of a minefield
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 15:05, archived)

I have seen that, it's a bit silly but worth a watch

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 15:47, archived)

Oh yeah sorry I meant to say that I'd watched it
I was hoping for something similar, well at least similar to the earlier bits of the film before it went a bit OTT
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 16:44, archived)

not seen that, no
didn't give me the feeling i'd like it too much, bit of a trying too hard vibe. have you seen ginger snaps? a bit teen angsty, but worth a watch
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 15:49, archived)

That film supplied just about all the period-themed horror I'll ever need to see, I think.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 15:55, archived)

yeah, it was a bit weird
but a nice break from all the "let's kill the babysitter" shit
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 16:22, archived)

Hmmmm I was hoping for a real horror that gets under my skin and doesn't rely on jump scares, maybe more sort of ghosty type thing
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 16:42, archived)

so, more psychological?
let me have a think
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 17:17, archived)

how about repulsion?
it's an oldie but a goodie
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 17:20, archived)

I've not heard of that but I will deffo look it up, thanks Smashie :)

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 17:29, archived)

let me know if you like it
look up Dario Argento's stuff, it's mostly very odd but definitely psychologically based
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 17:32, archived)

A Serbian film, lovely that one

(Nicki Minaj, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 18:48, archived)

2300, nobs

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 23:00, archived)

Is that your tally of Untermenschen for the day, mein Führer?

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 23:18, archived)

nah that would be a lot more

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 23:33, archived)

youtu.be/Obt4exbtvkI
(Ooooh_cuntroversials_sockpuppet Make O/T great again., Sat 1 Aug 2020, 23:35, archived)

how did you find my youtube account?

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 23:43, archived)

I wished upon a star.
(Ooooh_cuntroversials_sockpuppet Make O/T great again., Sun 2 Aug 2020, 0:39, archived)

to find out where i are

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 1:20, archived)

Afternoon all
Cup final, any views/prejudices, or don't care? I'll go for a 90 min draw, Chelsea to lift it and them up ahead at the half.
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:17, archived)

don’t know anything about football
except I was born on cup final day so my dad missed watching the game that year
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:29, archived)

I prefer sumo and marble league.

( brb homonecrobatrachophile, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:41, archived)

arsenal will thrash 'em
also i don't care
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:44, archived)

i knew arsenal would win
i have a buddy that will literally be in tears over this. typical chelsea supporter lol
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 23:06, archived)

The problem with Arsenal is, they always try and walk it in.
Etc.
(Ooooh_cuntroversials_sockpuppet Make O/T great again., Sun 2 Aug 2020, 0:40, archived)

i don't know what this means but i will agree with you

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 1:25, archived)

That and their off side trap.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 8:31, archived)

i just hope that football wins

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:46, archived)

hmmm. the football does usually score all the goals!

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:57, archived)

ho ho ho, you're a one!
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:59, archived)

he he he i am that!

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:59, archived)

Prince William has said their will be goals
Up the Royals!
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:13, archived)

which one is he?

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:24, archived)

youtu.be/45NOP1OA-EQ
(Ooooh_cuntroversials_sockpuppet Make O/T great again., Sun 2 Aug 2020, 0:41, archived)

come on football!

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:56, archived)

eww

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:57, archived)

soggy football
last one to "score a goal" has to lick it dry
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:13, archived)

Ewww

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:14, archived)

Weee

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:19, archived)

"Bend it like Beckham"

(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:23, archived)

it’s not possible to lick something dry
because of all the spit on your tongue
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:55, archived)

yn y/n

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 20:38, archived)

Football is shit and bent and for blobbing birds and woofters.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:49, archived)

Worst. Chant. Ever.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 20:24, archived)

It’s at this point I could perhaps say some lines from The IT Crowd regarding Arsenal, but I don’t want to trigger anyone by quoting the words of a transphobic.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 20:22, archived)

Moss: “Did you see that ludicrous display last night? Also, there are only two genders and it’s not physically possible to change gender.”
The other one: “I’m gender disabled!” *laughtrack*
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 20:34, archived)

morning
been up for ages prepping shit ready for jr. coming to stay, fuck me I'm excited
( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 8:33, archived)

They should remake the original Ghostbusters with Ed Sheeran as Egon.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 8:39, archived)

Unpopular opinion: that film is shit
It's not aged well at all and Bill Murray is a bellend
( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 8:52, archived)

Oh dear.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 8:59, archived)

Yes, dear?

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:26, archived)

What's wrong with Bill Murray?

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:32, archived)

He hasn't been very well since Zombieland.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:50, archived)

you are completely correct
that is an unpopular opinion
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:07, archived)

It's unpopular because it's wrong.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:12, archived)

YOU'RE unpopular because you're wrong, m8

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:24, archived)

Nah m2^3, everyone loves me round here.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:25, archived)

well, I disagree too
but it’s his opinion
he’s not stated it as incontrovertible fact
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:06, archived)

You're opinion is wrong.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:59, archived)

fuck off and watch bridge over the river kwai you fun sponge
alt - what you say is unarguably correct, i think it's time to admit that about die hard too
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:15, archived)

Breaking Bad and Peaky Blinders, too.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:27, archived)

oh no!
breaking bad is still amazing (i think)! i tried watching peaky blinders but i couldn't get past the accents so i gave up
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:31, archived)

Yeah the accents are pretty horrid.
It's good, for a couple of series, then you realise it's the same series every time.

Breaking Bad was ruined for me by all the over-excitement - "OMG literally the best television eva!", etc.
(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:49, archived)

haha yeah fair point, it's a lot to live up to
i think I was quite lucky in that i avoided a lot of the mania before watching it
(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 11:21, archived)

Same here, I knew almost nothing about it. Best way I reckon.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 12:30, archived)

I were on Facebook at the time it was big.
It was impossible to avoid the hype.
(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 13:35, archived)

ozark is better than breaking bad
come at me bro
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 15:58, archived)

oooo that is actually on my list to watch because i've heard similar

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:58, archived)

very very good. i binged it over just a few days or a week, my nephew also said it was better than breaking bad

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:01, archived)

i trust that's some sort of seal of approval in the hitler household

(Chuffer Dandridge Arkell ~vs~ Pressdram, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:28, archived)

it is i rarely watch much other than films

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 1:26, archived)

season 3 was incredible
“fire pink” was devastating
(ozof, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 13:37, archived)

A former colleague of mine in Anstruther
happened upon Bill Murray walking along the road with a freshly-bought bottle of spirits (I can't remember which kind, they're all the same anyway). She fangirled over him for a moment, and appparently he was very nice and exactly as you would imagine.
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:32, archived)

no they fucking shouldn't
had a weird crush on harold ramis as a kid, ed sheeran looks like an exploded muppet
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 13:13, archived)

Jude Law as Venkman.

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 13:35, archived)

not bad, not bad
but tom hiddlestone has to be in there somewhere
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 13:39, archived)

daughter is having a horse riding lesson this morning
so I get to stand in a shed for an hour. yay.
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:10, archived)

You could just get your own shed and save the money on those expensive horse riding lessons, you know.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:13, archived)

Dude this guy has about ten sheds

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:25, archived)

WHOA

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:26, archived)

That's a... wait for it...
....A SHEDLOAD!!!
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 9:27, archived)

I like this, and so have clicked 'I like this!' accordingly!

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:09, archived)

Good lad.
Or ladette, so hard to tell these days.
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:28, archived)

omg can we talk about your transphobia please?

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:50, archived)

k

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 21:08, archived)

many lols

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 11:08, archived)

cor
i WISH
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:09, archived)

it’s more that it’s the wrong shed
and there’ll be horses in it
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:07, archived)

They shoot horses, don't they?

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:24, archived)

shoot bum
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:33, archived)

Sexy s fuck.
Or should I say 'Sexy ass fuck'?
(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 10:51, archived)

You can always find at least one positive aspect to a SHED
No shed is 'wrong'
(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 11:16, archived)

Bloodshed?

(Justin Vagabond is hiding in Richard Clayderman's briefcase, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 13:11, archived)

that's where artisans make black pudding

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 13:34, archived)

Lol applause

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 15:18, archived)

Mourning

(Nadia Sawallah's wotsits Mask me up I'm going in, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 11:16, archived)

just paid the deposit for my next tattoo
gutted that i can't get it done till the 22nd, but i've just ordered myself a disturbed face mask off etsy, so swings and roundabouts
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 13:16, archived)

how much ‘ink’ have you got?
is it all co-ordinated? or do you look like the back cover of a gcse schoolbook?
(sticklebricks it's you daddy!, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 17:34, archived)

7 so far
but the 7th is the start of a sleeve, which will be all cartoon villains. a bit childish, but i love them
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 14:57, archived)

get a seesaw and a slide as well then you can have a whole playground

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sun 2 Aug 2020, 1:27, archived)

Hi Rich
You'll like this twitter.com/GuyFieri/status/1286406897764118529
( Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 15:09, archived)

He seems to be very popular with people who have anime character avatars.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 18:50, archived)

b3ta.com/r/talk
404 wtf
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 1:14, archived)

LitHit
edit: no because lower case, lithit doesn't work
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 3:27, archived)

Littler
Edit: That was the name of my RE teacher in junior school.She was tiny.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 3:33, archived)

Actually Adolf

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 3:45, archived)

Adolf, Actually
it's my new album
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 3:48, archived)

Is it any good?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 3:49, archived)

honestly? it blew me away.

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 3:51, archived)

A simple "no" would have been enough.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 4:11, archived)

alright mofaha what's shaking

( broadsword w⚓, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 4:16, archived)

Stevens in the 70s

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 1 Aug 2020, 12:49, archived)