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# Timothy's sense of timing was never that good..
smack it! smack it! YES! YESSSS! SMACK IT! THUMP HIM!
and finally proved to be the end of him.
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:24, archived)
# "there's only one way to kill a mole...
...BLOW IT'S BLOODY 'EAD OFF!
/jasper carrott
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:25, archived)
# With a hairdrier


woooooooooooosh
(Johnny2 Harrumph!, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:27, archived)
# They were showing a lot of him
on Living on Sky and the like on Sunday night, I quite enjoyed it. Then I saw Bill Bailey and have since been singing "Human slaves in an insect nation- ahaaah aaah haa aah aah!" constantly.
(I helped save b3ta! Whillow, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:28, archived)
# bill bailey's ace
he's the inspiration for my cup of cheese
(Johnny2 Harrumph!, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:30, archived)
# and my bottle of chips.
heeeza dude that bailey
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:31, archived)
# new edinburgh show is called
"part troll"
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:32, archived)
# arrr a dude he be



are you by any chance related to him?
(Johnny2 Harrumph!, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:33, archived)
# I wish I was.
My mum ran away before I was born and me dad was a pizza delivery boy who later died eating his own toenails.
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:35, archived)
# tragic story
my dad was a balloonist who just ballooned once too many times and popped. Me mam exploded with grief. And little Timmy the orphan... well we don't speak of THAT
(Johnny2 Harrumph!, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:37, archived)
# I think you should.
Right here, right now.

Bring it on!
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:38, archived)
# oh the pain
little... l-little timmy......

got run over by a rampant horny john major who just wasn't getting enough.

ooh the pain of it all


and cellery
(Johnny2 Harrumph!, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:41, archived)
# fact.
Never keep celery in a cellar under -14 degrees C.

Some russian dude once did that and it all fucked up.

Or maybe it was tin. Hmmmm.
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:43, archived)
# Damn it


i'd better hide the asparagus from paula then
(Johnny2 Harrumph!, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:45, archived)
# Do they still do toenail pizza?
And do they deliver? You've just made a young man very hungry.
(I helped save b3ta! Whillow, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:45, archived)
# ...
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:38, archived)
# I challenge u to find a cup of cheese!
(Johnny2 Harrumph!, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:42, archived)
# i made the bottle of chips
a cup of cheese you say?
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:48, archived)
# Well
I wrote it


YES! CUP OF CHEESE!
(Johnny2 Harrumph!, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:50, archived)
# Good one
and nice to see you again Mr R

Please note that I cannot actually see you
(I helped save b3ta! koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:26, archived)
# i can
heheheh
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:27, archived)
# oi mister
i've had a shite cold/flu thing for a week - nose/head is full of phlegm and voice box is raw - can i please be excused from band?
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:28, archived)
# errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
only if you really want to.

bum.
(I helped save b3ta! koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:32, archived)
# unless
it's not being deadlined for a week or so - have a headfull of snot... sorry to be graphic but it's true.
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:35, archived)
# its true.
it'll take fucking weeks to wash these walls.
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:37, archived)
# There's still time and I would like you in on it
loads of people have colds and exams (or a combo) so no rush.
(I helped save b3ta! koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:39, archived)
# that's good then : )
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:41, archived)
# didnt ask me you fucktard!
I'd refuse anyway, on the grounds of being shite.

but its the principal of the thing!
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:44, archived)
# some theivin muthas robbed our office and freatened us with knives and stuff..
and nicked me laptop.. So I've been away!

But now got a new Uber laptop and am back.

I think I sorta like those bastards now, double specially as I get another go in the unmarked police car on wendesday (I was making little "nee naw" noises last time. I think the rozzers thought I was still in shock :)
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:28, archived)
# Kinell
really ?

Shitting eck.
(I helped save b3ta! koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:32, archived)
# Yep.
The rozzers were ace tho. The turned the "wooo woooo" noise thing and put one of those blue flashy things on the dash and drove realllly fast.

We (they) stopped 5 potential "perps" and fisted frisked them and everthing.

It was ace. Except the robbery. That was bad.
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:37, archived)
# Sounds muchos fun
Robberies, by their very nature, are bad things

FACT.
(I helped save b3ta! koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:39, archived)
# I know.
But I think that I shall now pretend to be the police at every oppertunity and everything.
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:41, archived)
# that's a crime in itself you know.
phone the police and tell them you saw somneone impersonating a police officer, they might take you for another car ride.
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:43, archived)
# even if it was ME
doing the impersonating? We've got a loveley bedroom mirror and I've spent all evening in front of it going "Roight! Yore Nicked!"
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:46, archived)
# sorry dude
they don't let paddies in the met. you'd be sussed straight away.
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:48, archived)
# What what?
My dear chap, thats frightfully uncouth of the MET what what?
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:49, archived)
# that's what i said.
bvut thank you lucky stars you're not black, or they'd have kicked the fuck out of you by now.
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:51, archived)
# awwwwwwwwwwwww
poor bugger - he's about to get a four iron in the skull... bless!
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:27, archived)
# four iron?
that's a six by anyone's reckoning!
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:30, archived)
# you golf as well?
you are old AND gay! loser
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:36, archived)
# i don't know what a six iron is.
but yes.
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:38, archived)
# it must be half a 12 iron...
which in turn is a quarter of copper, which in turn MUST mean that golf SUCKS.

Troo.
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:47, archived)
# i'll buy that maths
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:48, archived)
# ahhhh, implied violence
my favourite kind. woo!
(I helped save b3ta! supermoore: HUNG, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:28, archived)
# i'm going to smack your fucking head in tomorrow
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:29, archived)
# that wasn't really
implied, was it?
(martian, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:29, archived)
# hahaha
great! :)
(I helped save b3ta! rogan, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:29, archived)
# haha
poor sod (no pun intended)
(I helped save b3ta! lemonhead, Tue 17 Jun 2003, 0:31, archived)