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Home » Messageboard » Celebrity Mutants » Message 8372148

[challenge entry]

From the Celebrity Mutants challenge. See all 450 entries (closed)

(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:04, archived)
# oh dear christ
and i thought hillary below was bad
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:05, archived)
# Her third breast is in a strange place...
Woo!
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:05, archived)
# Pfft!
Would!
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:05, archived)
# How?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:06, archived)
# Cut a fleshy love-tunnel.
Commence sexyfun.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:07, archived)
# Plus the fact that she still has a mouth no?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:08, archived)
# Aye.
If you're comfortable putting your schlong near her teeth.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:09, archived)
# Meh!
I would have about 10 years ago....
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:12, archived)
# You'd be safe,
she never eats anything anyway.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:14, archived)
# and two ears
and eye sockets
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:20, archived)
# OK...
Would! Couldn't.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:08, archived)
# Bagpiping
always good for orifice-lacking partners.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:09, archived)
# *looks up on urbandictionary*
*shudders*
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:11, archived)
# Apparently it's very nice.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:12, archived)
# Maybe...
but can it beat a soapy tit-wank?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:13, archived)
# I don't think many things can.
Breasts were made to be wet and soapy.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:14, archived)
# .......
*runs off for wank cold shower*
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:15, archived)
# Except tiny ones
I would imagine that'd just stop you getting purchase, as it were.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:16, archived)
# True.
But that would be classed as a soapy tit rub, though, wouldn't it?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:25, archived)
# Well you're very right.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:26, archived)
# Asymetry has always been my problem.
I'm considering surgery to have more left added.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:28, archived)
# Asymmetry is NORMAL. It is the way of things.
Your feet aren't the same size as each other, men's bollocks aren't.... etc.

Are you a lady then?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:32, archived)
# Nope.
I just lean funny.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:33, archived)
# Ah.
Well, yes, asymmetry is normal. Anybody looking for a perfectly symmetrical partner will be consigned to either the realdoll waiting list or a plastic surgeon's post-op waiting room. FFS.

(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:35, archived)
# Oh absoloutley.
Perfect symmetry is largely a photoshop trick, these days. With models eyes being fliped from one side of their face to the other, etc.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:43, archived)
# Exactly.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:44, archived)
# Being a flatfish, with my mouth on the side of my head
I'm no stranger to asymmetry.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:47, archived)
# No. Definately not.
Especialy if it's a stubbley armpit.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:14, archived)
# Reminds me a little of
something I watched on channel 4 once

*shudders and bokes*
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:34, archived)
# *does the same*
BUT WHY!?!!?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:13, archived)
# ^This
But *laughs*
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:13, archived)
# ^ Does that ^
*shudders and then laughs*

Joe bagpiped a french woman and had armpit hair stuck to his penis
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:23, archived)
# For fear of boking,
Bagpiping?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:12, archived)
# Shagging your partner's armpit.
Stand in front of partner, get them to put their arm by their side having lubed their armpit and slide your little nozzle in.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:12, archived)
# You sound like you may have let Mr Wow perform this! ;)
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:18, archived)
# Not Mr Wow.
My ex was very into trying new things, though. Including 'where you can fuck ladies that isn't the usual places if they get themselves into uncomfortable positions'.

Bah.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:19, archived)
# Freak!
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:20, archived)
# ear sex?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:20, archived)
# Never done, people can get the FUCK AWAY FROM MY EARS.
I'm deaf enough already.

Knee sex though.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:21, archived)
# i love ears
especially big ears. i'd like nothing better than to nibble on martin clunes' lugs.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:23, archived)
# He looks like my dad, but only when my dad is drunk.
So no, no clunes for me. Or Morrisey, the twat (yeah, both of them).

Caroline Aherne'd get it though.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:24, archived)
# my dad looks like
the bastard offspring of david jason and jack nicholson, with added eyebags.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:31, archived)
# Your dad sounds quite lush.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:32, archived)
# he is a fucking ugmo.
what my mother ever saw in him, i don't know.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:35, archived)
# You said the Jack word.
Now all I see is Jack.



Mmmmm.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:37, archived)
# jack?
jackjackjack
jackjackjack
jackjackjack
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:43, archived)
# Fucking hell.
Even when he's 90 I will still be totally fine with jumping his bones.

(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:45, archived)
# when he's 90
that's all he'll have left!
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:56, archived)
# I had that last time I went to Newcastle.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:23, archived)
# Right
now having said my post OUT LOUD AT WORK in a Geordie accent I'm still RISsing.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:24, archived)
# hahahaha
Nee as in no. I'll get my coat.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:27, archived)
# Scotish you silly man ;)
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:32, archived)
# I was wondering.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:32, archived)
# My ex used to like it in her ear
Every time I pushed Mr Winky towards her mouth, she turn her head to the side so it went in her ear...

www.instantrimshot.com/
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:57, archived)
# Hahaha
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 13:01, archived)
# ^ Oh, a woo to this.
I used to like bus stops. While the busses were still running. Mind you, you had to not check the timetable ftw.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:30, archived)
# Hahaha
I haven't heard anyone use that term for years.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:13, archived)
# *hums Mull of Kintyre knowingly*
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:14, archived)
# A point actually
Do you also have to made strange wailing sounds to the tune of Auld Lang Syne?
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:18, archived)
# OCH WAILYWAILYWAILY
Sorry. Wee Free Captain, there.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:20, archived)
# jings!
nac mac feegle wahey!
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:22, archived)
# I'd make an awesome Kelda.
I'm PERFECT for it. Except for the lack of Scottish. I'll just have to hold onto one.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:23, archived)
# i wouldn't!
i can boss men about until the cows come home, but i couldn't handle having hundreds of kids!
*shudders*
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:34, archived)
# I've been to Edinburgh once.
Wanna hold mine? ;)
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:35, archived)
# Niiiiiiice try.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:38, archived)
# I shall from this day forth be unable to think about Mull of Kintyre...
Without thinking of armpit sexytime.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:19, archived)
# Pfft, I never could.
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:20, archived)
# she's a fucking mutant
without any photoshopping
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:06, archived)
# ^six tons of this
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:06, archived)
# This scares me
(, Thu 15 May 2008, 12:10, archived)