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# mothers day
ive been too ill to go and buy my mum a card, so i made this



used google for inspiriaiton... my dad said as long as it had me in it, shed be happy. im the one behind tigger :D
(bobulatorm, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:02, archived)
# What IS that funny car thing??
I followed something just like it through shepherd's bush a few months back! It was mad..
(I helped save b3ta! E.S.Blofeld, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:10, archived)
# weirdness
god knows. its like the bastard son of a sinclair Z5 and one of them bmw bike things. i cant even vaugly remember what the search was for and how it was related to mothers day...
(bobulatorm, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:17, archived)
# heheh
never mind - i think that card looks better than any you can buy in the shops
(I helped save b3ta! E.S.Blofeld, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:59, archived)
# :D
cheers :D. come to think of it it might have been under a search for "foale" out surname. hmmmmm.......
(bobulatorm, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 15:16, archived)
# i sent my mum a printout of this:

cos she thinks that cards are a waste of money, and i thought it might brighten her day.
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:12, archived)
# If I sent my mum an email
she wouldn't get it - cos she hasnt
got a PC.
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:51, archived)
[challenge entry] Best thing to do with this
is leave it on full blast then go to work. Revenge!
(I helped save b3ta! Lum, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:59, archived)
# Hmm...
Something tells me you didn't get much sleep last night :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:22, archived)
# Nah..
They only do it on nights when I really need sleep.
The other nights I just get a gang of drunken people thumping their way up the stairs to the flats above mine at 3AM
(I helped save b3ta! Lum, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:40, archived)
# Well
about a month ago, some people in the flat below me started playing music. Not really loud, but with loads of bass which carries through to my flat... grrr...

so I booted up my Amiga, loaded Protracker, selected a low frequency loop as a sample, put my speakers to the floor, started the sample, and cranked up the volume.

Every time they turned their music down, I turned the hum down. when they restarted the music, I turned the hum back up, so they would think their stereo is fucked.

5 mins later, music stops, I go to bed. Wooo!
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:51, archived)
[challenge entry] Ahh yes..
There's only one thing worse than someone else's thumpthumpy music.

I designed this as a cure for it...
(I helped save b3ta! Lum, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 15:10, archived)
[challenge entry] Fresh Princess of Maidstone

'inspired'
(minoltion, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:32, archived)
# That's very scary
Lots of neck scagg in the middle of the many headed beast. Also isn't that Patrick Troughton aka as Dr Who No 2.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:40, archived)
# Seperated at birth ?
(minoltion, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:54, archived)
# That's more disturbing
Than what I had in my head, for a change.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:18, archived)
# in searching for
just the right pic of leo sayer, i found this
(skagg, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:30, archived)
# leo
I took that at Caesars in South London two years ago, Leo loves his strippers!

studio71
(Charlie, Sun 10 Mar 2002, 4:49, archived)
# I want...
what these guys were smoking.

torm3ntor.com/
(I helped save b3ta! Umojan, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:27, archived)
# paul calf is till funny. Yay!
don't forget to watch this tonight. Wonderland is pretty good too (afterwards)if it's the same film I'm thinking of.

BBC2 advert finished. Thank you
(I helped save b3ta! pete, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:22, archived)
# I'd say "The Fisher King"
on Channel 5 is tonites must-see...
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:29, archived)
# everyone
should watch Home Movies (from the same people who did Dr Katz) on cartoon network

it is quite possibly the wittiest program ever made.
(I helped save b3ta! DaWolfey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:52, archived)
# agreed
agreed
(spatchcock, Sun 10 Mar 2002, 14:31, archived)
[challenge entry] Glub O O o o o
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:19, archived)
# yay!
pure class on a stick!
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:31, archived)
# Extra bonus track?:
"The weird looking ones with the big cheeks..."
(Elisabeth Parma Ham, Parma Violets, Parmesan, Robert Palmer, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:46, archived)
# Fantastic
That is fantastic.
(637sabs, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 19:16, archived)
# Oh Yeah - OI ROB!
Where's the newsletter ?
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:14, archived)
# Right, shepherds pie deployed to oven
How's the b3ta m3ss3nger going...

Everyone like it ?
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:05, archived)
# all
i can say is well done that man/woman/thing! Now i'll never get any work done........
(redifusion, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:09, archived)
# FYI
man, sometimes thing too...
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:11, archived)
# sorry,
i thought you were all three =P
(redifusion, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:14, archived)
# Oy, REDIFFUSION!
Grab Scabby Dog and head down the Fishbowl! Should be there at about 8-8.30ish. C ya!
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:16, archived)
# coolio!
will be there 8-30 9-00..........
(redifusion, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:18, archived)
# Nice
The Wife just made Shepheards pie and we have scoffed it it. Yum. Must be a Shepheards pie vibe spreading over the land.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:17, archived)
# I cheat outrageously mind you.
Been cooking the mince etc all day.

Secret Ingredient: Bisto gravy ganules & regular water top ups. Fantastic!
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:21, archived)
# i might take a crack at the shepherd's pie thing myself.
thus proving that it is indeed sweeping the nation. mmmm... pie....

got to clean my jelly-filled frying pan, too...
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:25, archived)
# Woo
Me and Boy 1 had Blackcurrent jelly and Evaporated milk for our 4o'Clocksies today. There must be some kind of cosmic alignment thats causing all this food synchronisity, probably.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:35, archived)
# i made this food to get to #1 on foodex.


or something.
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:37, archived)
# Ahh I just checked
That is a site about the tropical fruit exports of Colombia, I see how your plan is working now. Underpant Toast is my most impressive culinary exploit
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:48, archived)
# i didn't even bother checking if it existed.
woo!

incidentally, this site is quite a good one about fruit. i like it, anyway.
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:08, archived)
# Those people
Are into apples in way that would seem to demand therpy
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:24, archived)
# but it is the king of fruit
i assure you!
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:36, archived)
# Ah I have to differ on this one
It's the Orange, on account they named a whole colour after it. Also it smells orange it tastes orange and its about the same size as an Orange. All of this gives it a very special place in the universe, probably tying together the very structure of space time, like those special plastic tag things that you can use to close jiffy bags. Lemons have long been jealous of Oranges status, only just missing out to them as undisputed citrus overlords. These were some of the themes I explored in Prawnzilla vs Citrus sheep.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:50, archived)
# they named a member of royalty after prince
and where is HE now, eh? orange is segmenting. clementines, mandarins etc. NO LONGER WANT TO BE A PART of the once proud orange family.
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:55, archived)
# Orange doesn't want Mandrins and Clementines
They have crap peel that comes off too easily, and have to go round in bags of six or more. Orange doesn't give up his peel with out a fight and will happily go out by himself. Don't even mention Kumquats.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 15:07, archived)
# The Wife
Knocks hers up in about 45 mins, lots of Worcestershire sauce is involved, and the lives of many many brave potatoes.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:29, archived)
# That's
very cool!

Bravo!
(I helped save b3ta! E.S.Blofeld, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:19, archived)
# Annoyingly
buttocks.com AND frontbottom.com AND EVEN feltup.com have all been taken.
I wouldn't mind if they were doing something good with them...
(Jesus, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:58, archived)
# Speccy!!!!
And I don't mean glasses...
Sinclair!!!
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:57, archived)
# In that case.....
Binary Dinosaurs!
Just fired up my "new" Vectrex last night.......hehe.
(I helped save b3ta! witchy is covered in BEES, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 18:23, archived)
# Hmm
My Sister (a mac user) has told me that my flash tony blair style guru thing (here) looks funny.
She sez the clothes are all huge to start with and overlapping and crap. They aint meant to be!
Anyone else looked at it and found the same?
Cheers in advance to anyone who can be bothered to take a look and let me know! :)
(I helped save b3ta! E.S.Blofeld, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:40, archived)
# Just looked on my Mac
And they are big to start with but it doesn't look crap at all.

Good stuff. Some crap comedy noises would be pleasing. I've used dropping things (pecan nut) in saucepans and sampling it is ace for drag and drop.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:24, archived)
# Thanks
More noises will probably be added. :)
It's strange though. They are meant to be small to begin with and then
enlarge when you click them and put them on Tony. That's what it does when I view it on my PC.
Any PC people have the same prob?
(I helped save b3ta! E.S.Blofeld, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:35, archived)
# Actually I just realised
I had my Mac on mute.
BTW My Flash plugin is right up to date so its not that.
(I helped save b3ta! nicey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:56, archived)
# my mate
on a PC reckons it all looks normal to him, so now I'm really confused..!
I'll try tweaking the actionscript.
(I helped save b3ta! E.S.Blofeld, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:08, archived)
# What the bejebus
is this?
www.jodi.org
(I helped save b3ta! helmetcream, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:36, archived)
# Someone with too much time on their hands?
???

and whats this bit about?..
(Elisabeth Parma Ham, Parma Violets, Parmesan, Robert Palmer, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:40, archived)
# The links from there
do stuff like log what you type, removing the vowels - This is the best site ever!
(I helped save b3ta! helmetcream, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:01, archived)
# what the hell
is that ???

some sort of bizarre teletext style representation of binary files or something ?

it make no sense!!!
(I helped save b3ta! DaWolfey, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:50, archived)
# As far as I can see
it just showes all the vowles out of the words you type at the bottom, probably really handy if you er.... um..... nah.
(Mint_Sauce, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 15:09, archived)
# It looks like
Teletext in a blender
(I helped save b3ta! E.S.Blofeld, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:41, archived)
# too good
for words.

erzagizidp
oiphpoizhtpht
zdejoiziptghhpngtz
90360wq4596u54
e5sr0yu5409 j
------------
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:52, archived)
# I reckon
it's one of those things like in that move Mercury Rising.
If you are a super-intelligent autistic 6 year old, you can see that it's a message
containing top secret national security info!
(I helped save b3ta! E.S.Blofeld, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 13:10, archived)
# quick dumb html question -
just about to go out, but you know background images in a table cell, do they repeat, you know, tile?
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:32, archived)
# yes...
making them much bigger than the table itself can stop this kind of problem though

I found this out yesterday!
(I helped save b3ta! pete, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:33, archived)
# ah ha! i actually do want them to tile
so that's cool. Thanks alot! I can go out now and stop worrrying about it! (i have a feeling there is much wrong with my life...)
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:35, archived)
# hmmm
you mustn't let these things worry you!
(I helped save b3ta! pete, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:35, archived)
# what happens when you fry jelly.
it melts. bad jelly! did it not know that it was expected to do something interesting?

i'll wait til it cools and see if it re-sets. if it does, then i'll eat it and see what it's like. it smells caramelley...
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:05, archived)
# I'll
have to have a go and get some footage, perhaps setting it on fire or something, I don't know.
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:15, archived)
# try deep frying it
b3ta could do a recipe book.
(I helped save b3ta! tomdog, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:18, archived)
# Could do
but don't have a a deep-fryer. How 'bout a microwave? Oh no, that's crap, it even gives you instructions on the packet I think.
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:24, archived)
# boil up a load of fat on the hob
dip the jelly in some batter and throw it in...

do it.
(I helped save b3ta! tomdog, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:27, archived)
# My contribution would be..
Mashed Potato sandwiches.

All i had in my cupboard yesterday was: one onion, the end of a jar of pasta sauce, 2 pieces of bread, mayonaise and a minimal amount of mash.

So I improvised by mixing them all together.
I am horrid.
(Elisabeth Parma Ham, Parma Violets, Parmesan, Robert Palmer, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:28, archived)
# might i suggest
carrot cake soup.

or a kitkat and cucumber sandwich (which is perhaps the most filling thing a human being can eat in one sitting).
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:43, archived)
# put it..
..in the microwave. see what happens.

marshmallows in the nuker are sweet:)
(pissycocks GIRAFFETASTIC!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 14:34, archived)
# Right, I'm off
to peel some spuds for me tea.

If anyone gets any ideas for b3ta m3ss3nger post em
here or drop me a message from b3ta m3ss3nger
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:03, archived)
# I think i need to get out more...
I just attempted to do a normal search on google and automatically clicked on image search.

I think I may have even dreamed of this place last night...

I am sad. Damn you b3ta...
(Elisabeth Parma Ham, Parma Violets, Parmesan, Robert Palmer, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 11:58, archived)
# Mwahahahaha!
We have you now :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:02, archived)
# No, you'll really be sad when
you start wearing luminous pink makeup, to look like your profile pic :-)
(I helped save b3ta! SqueakyG, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:06, archived)
# oh not this again:)
I can't help my face. Hush.
(Elisabeth Parma Ham, Parma Violets, Parmesan, Robert Palmer, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:09, archived)
# b3ta dreams!
i'm not the only one! hooray! who else here has b3ta dreams?

i used to look forward to dreams about sophie ellis bexter, but you've all ruined them...
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:11, archived)
# Need an excuse?
I liked this one.

14. I'm sorry but I have to break our date tonight. Y'see I kinda got my penis stuck in a rusty toaster.

nice.

clicky!
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 11:55, archived)
# OK. For those who aren't logged in...
-Just turned off auto-notify.
-Loads of message stuff - next, prev, reply, reply all - just like real eamil
-embed HTML in messages.
-delete messages
-"shit, it's the boss" link

Anything else anyone ?
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 11:51, archived)
# how about..
a random google image search? is that possible?
(I helped save b3ta! tomdog, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 11:52, archived)
# Untitled
givve da page a title :P
(minoltion, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:25, archived)
# shit it's the boss
= funny as fuck
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 11:26, archived)
# I haven't had to use it
(nsert rant here)

Because as we know, all bosses are part-time and the people that they're bossing do the real work.
That's right, I'm here at work, on a Saturday, no bosses, no shit to take from them, but also half the pay at the end of the month, whilst they sit on their fat arses drinking and watching football, which I should be doing. But no.

(finsh rant about here, get coat)
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 11:50, archived)
# TV Footy results...
Newcastle 0 : Arsenal 1

after 15 minutes
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 11:52, archived)
# .
Yay!
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 12:13, archived)

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